(Random) SONG OF THE DAY
Alex & Jisun – “너무 아픈 이말…” (these painful words…). If you’re a fan of either Clazziquai or Loveholic, you probably already know this song, which was a collaboration between the lead singers of both groups. [ Download ]
Can you FEEL the anticipation in the air?? (This chapter’s super-short, probably the shortest in the book.)
CHAPTER 19: “That Day”
We start Chapter 19 by going back to the events of that fateful day:
That day, after hearing the news that he was a third-generation chaebol, Eun Chan had cried till her eyes were puffy. At that moment, she realized just how much she cared for him. It had happened little by little as they worked together, squabbling and arguing with each other. The way he spoke, the way he laughed, the way he walked… how precise and clear he was, how fun, how handsome… She’d learned of his past and his family, and started to understand him. Without realizing it herself, she started acting similarly, and helping him, and leaning on him. Like the colors suffusing the sky at sunset, love had spread in her heart.
Eun Chan’s reaction is so intense because, just at the same time that she realizes her feelings for him, she’s made aware how lofty his position is, how impossible. The sense of loss is keen and painful.
That day, Min Yub once again arrives to challenge Eun Chan to a fight — for once and for all. But at the arrival of the other guys looking for Sun Ki, Min Yub brashly yells at them to wait their turn to fight, and makes things worse. Finally, Eun Chan can’t hold back anymore, feeling indignant at their nerve for busting into someone’s business to create trouble. In retrospect, perhaps she wouldn’t have been hurt if she’d acted a bit more rationally, or at least not injured quite so badly.
Eun Chan undergoes surgery and comes out successfully. Afterward, as she recovers, she waits for Han Gyul to come by, but he never does. Finally, she works up the nerve to call him. The moment she hears his voice, she trembles in nervousness and fear, and holds back the question, “Why haven’t you come to see me?” Han Gyul speaks coldly, asking why she’s calling, and she tries to explain that she’d meant to tell him the truth. She didn’t mean to keep deceiving him. But Han Gyul responds:
“If you’re talking about hiding the fact that you’re a girl, forget it. I’m not your boss anymore. Mr. Hong’s going to be the one to decide if he’ll keep you on or not, so it has nothing to do with me. If you’ve got to explain yourself, do it to him. Then, take care of your health.”
Like that, he hangs up. And afterward, he won’t even answer her phone calls.
Those words were like punishment to her — the ones that seemed to say, “I’m finished with you!”
Eun Chan gets more information when Han Sung visits her to tell her that he’d seen Han Gyul the night before, and he’d drunk himself practically unconscious. Han Gyul had said he felt like he’d been played with, hustled: “He said he’d faced someone with his true self for the first time in his life, and the girl had ended up playing him.”
Wiping tears away furiously, Eun Chan feels betrayed at those words, knowing she’d never played around with his feelings.
“I… I tried to tell him. I saw the chance, so I was going to say so… It was my fault for not being able to say it, but it seemed like I’d be kicked out of the cafe if I did. I knew this is how angry he would be, so I couldn’t tell him… I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to see him anymore…”
Han Sung knows Han Gyul well enough to understand his coldness, his ability to cut himself off and act distantly. He’s also still got a bit of childishness in him, and like a child, he won’t listen to anyone because he’s angry.
“I knew he’d be like that……”
When Eun Chan had found out Han Gyul was a third-generation chaebol, she’d cried from the sadness and waste of all those feelings she’d been building up. She had felt the blow of realizing that he was too far away. She’d been afraid knowing he’d leave eventually, crying because someday, she wouldn’t be able to see him anymore. But now, that had become reality. She felt desolate. This was what it felt like to have everything in front of her turn black, and the sky come crumbling down.
/end Chapter 19.