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Scent of a Woman: Episode 12

We knew it wasn’t going to be an easy road for Yeon-jae, but the moment she gives in to her despair, it cuts like a knife. Her hope and her desire to fill her time with meaning starts to give way to resentment and fear of what’s to come, and everything around her that points to the future starts to magnify the damning truth… that she’ll never have one.

What aggravates me is that it’s getting harder to watch the couple continually angst when there’s such precious little time left for them to even do anything. We’re on a clock here, people! Not just a drama clock, but the grim reaper kind, and not a friendly neighborhood Scheduler version either. I just want to smack some sense and some urgency into somebody, or everybody. Except for Poopypants. He gets a hug.

 
EPISODE 12 RECAP

Ji-wook asks one last time if Yeon-jae really wants him out of her life, and she sticks with Operation: Die a Noble Idiot, and says yes. Aaaaaargh. *stomping of feet*

He cries, she cries, and Eun-seok can only watch and be frustrated like me.

Eun-seok asks if this is really what’s right, and she tells him that she loved her dad, but sometimes she resented him. She wondered why he had to have cancer, why he wasn’t like other dads. And every time she caught herself laughing, she immediately felt guilty. Aw. My heart breaks for little Yeon-jae.

She says that she couldn’t do anything without feeling that survivor’s guilt – eating, sleeping, laughing. Ji-wook will have to go through the same, and long after she’s dead, which she can’t have. When she puts it like that, it’s hard to be mad at her for pushing him away.

The next day Mom catches her cleaning out her closet, and she takes Mom shopping to fill her closet as she empties out her own. Mom eyes a new winter coat for Yeon-jae and insists she try it on, but Yeon-jae looks at it wistfully and says, “I don’t think I’ll need it.”

I don’t know why, but that’s sadder than when people are crying in this drama – I love the implication of something so simple as a winter coat reminding her that she won’t be around to see winter.

The moment stays with her, and at home even the ticking clock on her nightstand starts to take on an irritating power, as she starts to envision it ticking faster and faster and taking precious seconds off her life.

She runs out of the house and back to Teacher’s bakery, and this time as she looks in from outside, we see a bit of the backstory in flashback. Yeon-jae ran away crying from Teacher, and then Mom later asked if he did anything inappropriate to her. He was promptly fired.

This time she blurts out right away that she’s sorry. She tells him that she hated the fact that he liked her mother. It reminded her of Dad and she wanted to split them up, so she lied. She asks for his forgiveness.

He asks why she’s doing this now, after so many years, when he’s buried all that in the past. She tells him that it’s been weighing on her all this time, and asks again for his forgiveness. But he’s not ready to forgive, and walks away.

Hee-joo congratulates Eun-seok on his impressive tango, as does the entire hospital, now that they know the stony-faced doctor moonlights as a latin lover. Who knew a little tango could go such a long way?

Hee-joo asks why he danced with Yeon-jae, and he tells her that they’re grade school friends. She gets adorably jealous, asking how serious Yeon-jae’s cancer is. Pfft. I really love how this girl doesn’t treat death like death.

Eun-seok stays too preoccupied with Yeon-jae to enjoy his new popularity though, and calls her out for a walk. She sighs at all the happy people passing by, now just reminders of what she’ll never have. She tells Eun-seok that she’d prefer if time just passed quickly now. Oof.

Ji-wook is as depressed as Yeon-jae, barely even registering the people around him. Sae-kyung shows up to ask for another chance, admitting that what she’s shown him thus far isn’t her true self. Yeah, that’s not a comfort really.

He walks away, but then apparently a shower changes his mind. Damn that shower. I have equal love and hate for you right now.

He takes Sae-kyung out, but then proceeds to just drown his sorrows in drink and she tries to stop him. He asks what it is she wants – to marry? “Fine. Let’s get married. Within the month.”

She can read the situation well enough to know this isn’t what she wanted. It hurts her pride something fierce to have him use her as a bandaid when he’s clearly a wreck because of Yeon-jae.

He scoffs at her, asking if she wants to date or fall in love, as if she just asked for a purple unicorn that lays eggs. She confesses that she was serious when asking for a chance, and tells him that she doesn’t dislike him, but he doesn’t have the right to step on her pride, and storms out.

Hye-won comes to see Yeon-jae with news, and Yeon-jae gives her a brooch that she’s been wanting for a long time. Hye-won thanks her for making her reconsider the guy who proposed, because it turns out that she’s pregnant.

She’s getting married within the month because of the shotgun nature of the whole deal, and Yeon-jae happily congratulates her. Hye-won says she’s sorry and Yeon-jae does the right thing, refusing to let her feel bad for her own happiness.

Mom gets suspicious when she sees Hye-won crying yet again, and Yeon-jae tells her the news. Once Hye-won leaves Mom blows up at Yeon-jae for being the last to be married, wondering how she can just be happy for her friend with no recourse for her own dead-end life.

She screams at her to get a job this instant, because she’s too embarrassed to even introduce her to people. Yeon-jae refuses and blows up right back, saying that Mom doesn’t even know what she’s going through. “Do you think I’m just endlessly happy for Hye-won?” She sobs into her pillow.

Ji-wook continues his zombie existence, until he finally can’t stand staring at Yeon-jae’s plant any longer, and asks the housekeeper to get rid of it. He shows up at Sae-kyung’s place, intent on starting over with her.

Eun-seok calls and Yeon-jae tells him that she’s going wedding dress shopping with Hye-won today, and he tells her not to eat anything bad or drink anything, and she tells him that he must be busy, so he doesn’t have to call every day to check on her.

He stammers, genuinely surprised, “Did I do that?” AW.

Hye-won tries on a wedding dress and Yeon-jae looks up at her happily, but with mixed emotions fighting beneath the surface. When Hye-won gets a call from hubby-to-be and has to run off, Yeon-jae starts to walk away, but then stops in front of the window.

She goes back inside and asks if she can try on a dress, and the sales associate is really sweet about it, saying that she’ll probably be married soon, since trying on a dress is a sign that she’s ready to be married.

She opens the curtains and Yeon-jae looks at herself in the white dress, barely able to hold back the tears. It’s heartbreaking and lovely, all at the same time.

Ji-wook gets called to dinner by Dad, who jumps the gun and invites Sae-kyung, wanting to skip the engagement this time and go straight to the wedding. Exasperated, Ji-wook tells him that they just barely started, and that if they end up liking each other, they’ll date, and maybe get married, just like other normal people. Seriously, Dad.

When Ji-wook drops her off after dinner, she asks when he’ll start being happy to see her. He wonders the same thing, and drives off. Ha. Way to tell a girl you have totally indifferent feelings towards her.

Yeon-jae comes home and goes through her bucket list, adding the picture of her in the wedding dress and marking that one with a teary face. Aw.

She starts to cry as she looks at the page, the tears turning into angry sobs as she comes to resent the fact that she even has a bucket list to cry over. She tears it in half, wailing out loud.

She grabs her half of the plant she gave to Ji-wook and shatters it on the ground, and knocks down the rest of the plants along with it. She goes straight for the kitchen sink and starts gulping down soju straight out of the bottle, desperate to numb the raging anger and heartache.

She ends up in front of Ji-wook’s house, but hides as he arrives. He stops and turns around, perhaps feeling something, maybe just missing her, and she stays hidden from view, tears falling.

Mom comes home to find the empty bottles and the mess in Yeon-jae’s room and gasps. Yeon-jae comes home and just collapses on the floor, washed out from her emotional tornado.

She admits to having a really tough time, and Mom just hugs her and apologizes for making the Hye-won situation worse when she’s clearly upset about it already. God, I don’t even want to think about how sad it’s going to be when Mom finds out.

Hye-won invites Ji-wook to her wedding, and asks if he’s really going to end things with Yeon-jae this way. He says that this is what Yeon-jae asked for, and she tells him that Yeon-jae fell for him at first sight, and she’s doing this to protect him.

He knows and doesn’t dispute it, and says that he’s doing what she wants.

Meanwhile Eun-seok gets an invitation to dinner from the chief of staff, who was impressed with his tango and wants to thank Yeon-jae for giving other patients hope. He calls but Mom picks up her phone instead.

She says that Yeon-jae went out without her phone, and then she looks around the room feeling that something is off – she’s been weird the last few days, and then overnight she cleaned up the mess and left without her phone.

She calls Hye-won, who calls Eun-seok, who paces and worries, and then calls Ji-wook. He asks if he’s with her and to call if he sees her, but doesn’t say anything else. But Ji-wook knows it’s serious enough that Eun-seok would even call him, and starts pacing too.

It turns out she’s skulking outside Teacher’s bakery. This time she sends in a note – that she knows asking for forgiveness with one “I’m sorry” isn’t going to cut it, but that she really wanted to say one thing…

She thanks him, for covering up her absurd lie, and for taking the fall. She tells him that she always wanted to say thank you and sorry, but never had the courage to do so. Her letter finally moves him, but when he comes outside to find her, she’s gone.

Day turns into night and everyone’s worry turns to fear as they sit and wait for word from Yeon-jae. Eun-seok runs all over town looking for her, in the dance studio and in the neighborhood, but can’t find her.

Ji-wook runs out to do the same, and finds her at the Han River, sitting there in the place where he proposed and got rejected. He walks toward her, but then he remembers her pleas that he not be around to watch her die.

It rips him up as his heart races toward her, but his feet stay firmly planted in their place. Just then Eun-seok calls to see if he found her, and he tells him where she is.

And then Eun-seok walks up to the same place where Ji-wook was just standing. God you boys are taking turns just gutting me. How can you both be so heartbreaking one after the other?

Eun-seok storms over to Yeon-jae, pissed at her disappearing act when everyone is worried sick. I don’t think his worry is unwarranted since he knows how depressed she is right now, but technically, she’s a grown woman who just forgot her cell phone for a day. His worrying is cute nonetheless.

She wonders how he found her here, and he doesn’t lie about Ji-wook being the one who found her. I love this guy. She’s clearly disturbed to realize that Ji-wook came and went, and Eun-seok gripes about her breaking up with him if she’s going to be like this.

Yeon-jae: “Eun-seok-ah, I wish my life would just end right now, like this.”

Nooo! It’s crushing to hear her be so sad that she doesn’t even want to cling to her remaining days.

At home, Mom starts putting more of the pieces together and decides that something is definitely going on with Yeon-jae. She asks Hye-won if she knows, and Hye-won tries her best to play dumb to Mom’s worries.

Eun-seok brings her home, and Mom wonders what the hell is going on with her, but Hye-won intervenes and takes her to her room. Mom does get distracted long enough by the presence of Eun-seok, and walks him out.

Her Future Son-in-Law Radar goes off, and she asks what his relationship to Yeon-jae is. She’s a little disappointed to hear that they’re just grade school friends, but when he asks her to take good care of Yeon-jae, she sends him along cheerily, practically plotting their wedding march in her head.

Hye-won asks if she shouldn’t get married, and that maybe she should’ve been more considerate about Yeon-jae’s feelings. Yeon-jae tells her that’s ridiculous and assures her that it’s not because of that.

Eun-seok calls Ji-wook, who’s now sitting in the spot where Yeon-jae was. He tells him that Yeon-jae is home safe and sound, and thanks Ji-wook for his help. Aw, such a well-mannered curmudgeon.

It’s time for Hye-won’s wedding, and her coworkers stream in, but Yeon-jae is nowhere to be found. Hye-won worries and waits, and Yeon-jae finally arrives just before the ceremony starts.

Yeon-jae looks at her friend and tells her that she looks beautiful, and tells her to live a long and happy life. Hye-won cries and Yeon-jae walks her into the room.

She turns to see Ji-wook arriving, and they stare for a charged moment, until Yeon-jae walks into the room. He steals glances at her throughout the entire ceremony, which she watches in a mix of happiness and utter despair.

She makes a quiet exit before it’s over and he goes too. He drives along outside and then sees Yeon-jae doing a zombie walk right into the middle of an intersection, ignoring the cars zooming at her.

It’s unclear whether she’s dazed or actively trying to get hit, but Ji-wook sees the oncoming car and swerves in its path, taking the hit to save her.

She stops at looks up at the accident not two feet from where she’s standing, and sees blood streaming down Ji-wook’s face as he stirs.

Her jaw drops in shock.

 
COMMENTS

I’m not gonna lie – this episode was pretty much the definition of a downer, with Yeon-jae falling into the worst of her depression. It kills me to watch her come to resent even the little time that she has left, to the point that she’d rather die now than go through what’s ahead.

At this point I’m just desperate for anything to change her mindset, even if it’s something cruel like false hope of remission, just to get her living again. It’s like she’s already dead, which pains me more than the fact that she’s dying. Perhaps with Ji-wook’s reckless but heroic act, she’ll be jolted out of her misery and grab hold of something, anything, to live the rest of her days instead of just wishing they’d end.

It breaks my heart that Eun-seok is there for her but it’s not enough, and he knows it. To call Ji-wook, despite knowing what it means… it’s the kind of love that really gets to me, because it’s asking for nothing in return. This really is an interesting untraditional love triangle because I think Eun-seok is the better man, but Ji-wook is the person she loves, no question. And the fact that she only has a few months to live means that both get to be by her side in a way, and then both have to lose her. Without that traditional one-guy-winning-the-girl sort of setup, it’s a great way to not have to split loyalties. Sometimes you CAN have your cake and eat it too. For a hefty price, of course.

Just… somebody, please do something happy soon. I’m going to start picketing if this stupid denial continues any longer.

 

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Is Episode 12 preparing us for an ending wherein both Kang Ji Wook and Lee Yeon Jae die?

There are worse things than death, and this might be the predicament in which Kang Ji Wook finds himself at present. Just as his love for Lee Yeon Jae reached its full-blown stage, she brutally broke up with him. (As he pointed out, the timing was most cruel.) Obsessed and unable to let go, he managed to make things far worse for him by uncovering her cancer in the ugliest possible way. Yet, it is too late for him to pretend that he never knew her. The upshot of Episodes 11 and 12 is that, in the end, he is damned whether she remains in love with him or not, and whether they are together or not. For him, the purgatory has already arrived, and she is not even dead yet. At this point, I can see why he might prefer death.

That is, unless Schweitzer (a.k.a. Dr. Chae Eun Seok) invents a miracle cure for her just in time and wins a Nobel Prize.

In Episode 11, Kang Ji Wook accuses Lee Yeon Jae that she MADE him fall madly in love with her. Even worse, she did so without full disclosure. Naturally, he now hates that he is crazy about her. She does not deny the accusation but meekly counters that she never thought she could make him fall for her. But that is like saying she didn’t know that she could hit a mark from 1,000 feet away. It was her bullet, she pulled the trigger and now the blood is on her hands.

Moreover, upon realizing that death will liberate her from all consequences of her actions but not him from his eternal misery, what does she do? Her way out of taking any responsibility for the terrible tragedy she has unleashed upon him is to break up in a hurry under false pretense and hope for the best. Wrong again! It is too late for him to forget her and the damage is already done.

Don’t be led astray by any of the above red herrings that Episodes 10, 11 and 12 let in. Before the fateful night when she finally proposed romance to him, Lee Yeon Jae never did anything affirmative to pursue him romantically, other than telling him what was her on the mind, and even ended things between them once. It was Kang Ji Wook, aided by many implausible coincidences (possible only in Korean dramas), who could not stay away from her. Being no idiot, she knew he was already head over heels in love (if not obsession) with her when she proposed romance (not marriage) to him. She did not initiate anything new. She merely gave her consent to what he passively-aggressively sought. I disagree with everyone who holds her responsible for not disclosing her cancer sooner or for any and all that followed from her proposal.

But a separate question remains. Should they be in love with each other? Are they good for each other?

At first, my answer was no, and not because of the disparity between their socio-economic status or age. Both were new to dating and totally ignorant of arts of love. Despite his good looks, he possessed numerous traits that made him a boyfriend from hell. She was mainly attracted to his looks and status, as one might objectify a Ferrari. When they met by accident in Okinawa, both were flawed, needy and seriously deficient. At best, they were attracted to, and intrigued by, what the other had. Sure, they would learn some valuable life lessons from what is first love for both, but the novelty seemed certain to wear off sooner or later.

Then, against all odds, their mutual attraction began slowly turning into genuine, powerful, unconditional and eternal love. So far, much (or all) of the credit goes to Kang Ji Wook. Had it not been for the core and the backbone that he grew along the way, the two would not be where they are today. Episode 12 is a prime example of his love for her: 1) he knew where to find her, when she went missing and 2) he threw himself in the harm’s way to save her, willing to give his life. My heart goes out to all his pain, sorrow, and tears that he has already suffered. Unfortunately, I have no doubt that more is on its way.

In the next four episodes, it is Lee Yeon Jae’s turn to sublimate this love for both. It takes two to tango. She needs to step up to the plate and prove herself worthy of his love rather than continue to play victim. Otherwise, Scent of a Woman will end up becoming yet another drama about unrequited love between two ill-matched lovers. What a pity that would be.

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Dominique, you comment totally explained why my heart ached much more whenever I see Ji Wook than when I see Yeon Jae. Yeon Jae needs to stop playing victim and prove that she is worthy of the love from Ji Wook!

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Yeon Jae has her hands full coming to terms with the fact that she is very likely dying of cancer. She's working through a process of grief and at times she may be selfish, she may self-victimize, she may be emotional, she may be harsh or distant... Really, she's entitled to play any role she wants at this point (to the exclusion of, you know, becoming a serial killer or something) and doesn't need to prove anything to anyone.

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I don't think the scriptwriters are foolish enough to let both leads die, but this is enough schocker for YJ to realize that she needs to live while she's alive, coz there are people who appreciate her and are willing to die for her...pls let this be the last slump before her death, or i'll join the picket with girlfriday!!!!!

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i wish this story is not going to be like stairway to heaven which both main leads died...and please no more amnesia thing............

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hey, i thought the male lead survived in stairway to heaven? I dunno, it was all blurry bcoz of all the crying...

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I completely agree with your response, Dominique! Yeon-jae tried to get away from Ji-wook many times after she found out that he was to be engaged/married, but he always came back to find her. Perhaps she did not tell him that she knew him and her condition in Japan, but seriously, who makes friendly and hangs out with someone new abroad for a few days and tell that person that she actually has terminal cancer? And being friendly and traveling together for a few days considered seducing? :|

But seriously, she is going through all the stages of grief in the classic order: Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance. She will be in the acceptance stage soon, so no worries about her being depressed for too long. I think that the drama does a good job with the pace and doesn't spend too much time on one issue or another (besides Yeon-jae keeping her condition from her mom).

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Thanks for your sharing. I went look up at Wiki and now it makes me appreciate the writer more - that she's trying to describe the various stages of dying in this drama.

Yes it may be ugly to watch but it's also so realistic.

I am also optimistic that YJ will be in her acceptance stage v soon and finally we get to see some lovey dovey moments of the couple.

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most epic first comment evaaaaaaa

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Yes, about time. For a second, I actually forgot that I was reading the comments section.

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yes absolutely!
i've gotten so used to seeing one-line/one-word first comments... (not that i'm saying they are not amusing... but just that this is a trend only recently begun here...)

anyways, i had to check and double-check if Dominique really was the first... it must have been a slow day at DB for her to have been able to respond at length and articulately, without somebody else's FIRST!!111 or Thanks :-) beating her to it.

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Thanks for your thoughtful contribution.

A few times while watching episode 12 I felt myself thinking that of OTP, Ji-Wook was the one more in love.

Before Yeon-Jae he was suffering from soul death, a man going through the motions. I think she tapped into a reserve of passion he didn't know he had. And as he respect her wishes and tries to sever the relationship I see him slipping back into his personae of the living dead-Instead of the past where he was indifferent to everything now he only feels pain.

Yeon-Jae has so much to care about, her health, her mother, setting her world right before she goes. Although she loves him and would love the comfort of being with him, he is a piece, not her whole life. Also she knew the situation before she started and was therefore able to possible protect her heart. She didn't believe she could be so deeply in his heart. His father, SK the world tells her she is out of his league. She didn't seduce him. You are right, once she knew he was spoken for, she backed off. She knew he was attracted. But she also knew he was engaged. She figured while he might be her last love, she would be his pre-marriage fling/distraction. His feelings/commitment through her off balance and forced her to try and correct the situation. Unfortunately since she can't turn back time, she can't stop his pain.

At this point it seems that the only thing the keeps him from Zombieland is her. He committed his heart before he knew he shouldn't. And while he doesn't like the situation, he realize there is nothing he can do to unlove her so he'll do the best with the time she has left--even if that means respecting her unsatisfying decision to stop their relationship.

The thing that is heartbreaking is that she knows he loves her. AND he knows she loves him--which is why he knew where to find her. But now they just spend their time watching each other suffer across rooms instead of providing each other with whatever comfort they can.

All I can say, for the pain it puts me through, this drama, better give a good ending.

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"All I can say, for the pain it puts me through, this drama, better give a good ending."

Yes, I totally agreed with you there. It better have an awsome out of this world ending (preferrly a happy ending--which might not be likely but 50% chance a yes I hope)!

If it end up a happy ending, shoot, this drama will be on the list of my top k-drama ever!

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I'm with you , craving for a happy ending although I know it's impossible. What hapy ending can we expect? A "deus ex machina" who arrives at the last moment with a new cure looking for voluntaires who have nothing more to loose and who are ready to have this drug experimented on them. Does it sound veridic? Not very much. But I can't bear any longer this pain, it's heartbreaking.I don't know for whom I ache most, Yeon Je or the two guys. I always appreciated Kim Sun Ah, but now I'm an unconditional fan. So let's have a happy ending!

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Well, I read this true story about how a woman gave half her liver to a patient with liver cancer ... so maybe a cure isn't that impossible. (Cross fingers)

SOAW is just a hard drama to watch though. I keep trying to avoid it cos I know it'll hurt in the end, but I keep getting drawn in. Argh!

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I actually see there is always that possibility. I think the little plant is the simbolism for that "hope", and her mom said that it was going to die but it made sprouts... Now she's losing her hope and at the same time she broke the vase with the plant. But Ji Wook still has (somewhere? Maybe his maid) a bit of hope... I don't know if we're supposed to think that these little plants are only the hope or if they are the chance for a recovery.
I actually don't mind seeing her die as long as she will be very, very happy in the last months. I'm just following the drama and I like how it is going, but please give us some good moments soon!

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I love what you have to say about Ji Wook's development and the intricacies of their relationship.

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I love your comment...I thought of the same thing...but of course you said it better....thanks for sharing

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That was a brilliant commentary. You took the words right out of my mouth. Agree on all counts. :)

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girl, i don't know you but that comment deserves the top spot and a round of applause. Brilliant. Just Brilliant. You said everything that i ever wanted to put into words. :)

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This is exactly why comments saying something like "first" should be promptly deleted and buried. There are tons of readers who have something intelligent and interesting to contribute who deserve a chance to be heard. So thank you so much for showing first comments can actually be worth reading. :)

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You're absolutely right. It's a fact that I learn nothing from "first" comments and feel all the more pabo for just looking at them.

Kudos to Dominique for an epic first post.

JW and YJ have now trade places, so YJ really has to snap out of her zombie state. Her shocked look shows that she's reached rock bottom of all rock bottoms. The only way out is too look up and don't look back.

An appropriate ending is all I ask, chaebal.

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thank for the recap.heart break after reading these..its make me sad T^T

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I just happened to stumble upon an article on Jang Jin Young and read some related articles... and surprisingly her lovestory was sorta the same with this drama's plot...

She met a guy then she discovers she had stomach cancer so she breaks up with him until she tells him the truth but then he stays beside her and even tied the knot abroad... but then she passed away...

so does this mean the wedding scene in Japan is going to come true? I hope so...

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I hope so. As long as they are happy for however short that happiness is, it's better then a sad ending all around.
(sigh) It seems no matter what, this drama is going to end up sad. It's too bad. It's a drama--Please have a happy ending!

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Ooooo....incidentally, Jang Jin Young is a close friend of Suna's. There is a possibility this story might go there or end there.

A sad happy ending is all I can handle. Gosh, I've already cried me my own Han River.

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Dominique, do you you have a blog?

IF not, can you start one?—I'd "stick" to your blog like "white on rice!" :)

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I just caught up to all 12 episodes after beginning to watch this drama accidentally last weekend. It's such a treat for the eyes, what with the scenery and of course the eyecandy. I am seriously frustrated with the realism of the drama seeing that we are only four episodes away from the finale. But if we are to take this drama at face value, the way LYJ rejected KJW is true to form. When she learned of her diagnosis, she was in pure denial from episode 1 through the episode when she and KJW kissed on Wando Island. Then she experienced the anger and now is in the acceptance phase...I wish there would be a happy ending...so, please Show give me more fantasy all this crying is seriously making me dehydrated

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thank you for the recaps girlfriday...i've watched this episode...it was sooo painful :(

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omg! they can die together!

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what.... no.

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LOLL

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YAYYYY i can read this before going to sleep :D thanks for recapping so fasttt. i start school tomorrow, so i was worried i wouldn't be able to read it. thanks jb and gf :]

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Thanks for the recap!this ep totally killing me with full of tearing eyes!love the all scenes very much..hv a nice day!

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Oh my, yeon jae is seriously going to die if hye won is going to have a baby. Right? And the baby will be totally named yeon jae, right? I'm really hoping soaw does not follow suit and changes up the game. I can't handle it anymore!

And kang ji wook, what could his head have hit for it to bleed so suddenly? Ha, but besides that, what's going to happen to him? Unconscious? Coma? Finding something when running tests on him too? I think having us wait a week is inhumane. And only 16 episodes?! Gotta be kidding me. The ending better not be too rushed like too many other dramas.

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Ha, can you imagine if they put him in a coma. YeonJae has a few months left to live, but the guy she loves isn't even awake for it. That would be hilarious.

I wish I had waited until this was fully complete before watching it because the waiting every week just kills me!

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hahahahha... maybe that was what the director thought thus they called it a rom-com earlier..

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@ Caitlyn.... hahahah! that's what i thought too, that he would be in a coma and that he'll be awake just in time to witness YJ's dying hours. at least they could both say... hello and goodbye, saranghae. lol

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I hope that the writers don't make him suffer from amnesia ... though that would make for more angst. Like, if, because of this incident, Yeon jae decided to live but ... Ji Wook doesn't remember her.

Should she help him regain his memory or leave him as it is?

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That's what crossed my mind. But I wouldn't want this drama to touch BOF territory, or any other kdrama territory. I like that it has somewhat of it's own storyline. So if the writers find some jaw dropping way to finish the story, soaw wins over a bunch of other dramas in my book. :)

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Thank you ep 12 was so unexpected.I think it made me so sad like you wouldn't believe.

SIGH.

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ughh, i feel the misery, my heart breaks too. that red car being crushed...

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Lol. The car! What about Ji Wook?

But I don't think we need to worry. I watched the scene twice and I think they used another car for the crash; they only show closeups of the actual crash, and in the wider shots the angle makes it look like the cars are touching, but you can't really tell. I think. I may be wrong, but I seriously doubt the people behind this drama would crash such an expensive vehicle.

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oh my.. ive been waiting for this since last night (as im from the Philippines ^,^)

its breaking my heart already.. :( i just hope the writers/producers would make a really good ending on this.. ive been disappointed so many time in the past.. :)

thank you girlfriday

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so sad. i wish that YJ would just choose to spend the rest of her days with JW and help him prepare for her imminent death by making real good memories which he can cherish when she is gone. i can't bear watching this ..... i hope something happy happens between now and the remaining 4 episodes. is it just 4 episodes to go? and here i thought that it's at least 20 episodes in all.

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Quote: "i wish that YJ would just choose to spend the rest of her days with JW and help him prepare for her imminent death by making real good memories which he can cherish when she is gone."

Yeah. That was what I learnt from watching 49 days. In the context of dying soon, love is not about leaving the person so as to diminish the pain when one's dead. It's about making enough good memories to prepare him/her to overcome the grief from one's departure.

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Yeah, for the first time, I found myself angered by Yeonjae. She has so many people who love her. Who are going out of their minds because they love her. Her life was so much richer than Jiwook's ever was.

Live. Let people share your highs and lows with you.

So snap out of it. I want Cher to come over from Moonstruck and give her a good slap.

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I agree. Yeon jae said she didn't want Ji wook to watch her die, but she should give him the chance to watch her live and be there with her.

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"i wish that YJ would just choose to spend the rest of her days with JW and help him prepare for her imminent death by making real good memories which he can cherish when she is gone."

I remain hopeful that this is the direction the show will wind up taking in the end.

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and oh, i hope no more amnesia this time :)

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hi

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Wow...what an angst fest this is D:

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thanks :)

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Thanks for the recap of the hopefully it's the-darkest-before-the-dawn episode. I'm with you on how awful it is to watch despair. If it doesn't get better soon, I'm done. Too much pain for dumb reasons.

It's like the two are walking around in invisible boxes that keep the other out. Both needing the other to break the glass that separates them. Both doing stupid "hurt you now instead of later" things to each other instead.

I'm hoping the car accident did the trick for YJ. If she sees that he almost died, it should set off all kinds of dying is bad alarms. Cause dying is bad. Living is good.

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I can never get behind the "let's break up now because we will break up eventually" approach once hearts have become involved. And that choice only happens after hearts become involve.

I understand Yeon-Jae's (stupid) impulse to protect Ji-Wook from the pain of her passing. Her mother only confirmed her decision with the "hammering a nail in the heart" metaphor. But what she can't see is that it's too late to protect him. From "how can I/you/we put my/your/our feelings aside when we are like this" he gone. What her decision does is leave him with pure heartache, without the pain tinged joy of being together to help him bear the emptiness.

During my favorite foot-washing break-up seen ever MLKSS, Hee-Jin tells Jin-Heon that Sam Soon with become familiar and boring too. I remember his reply as (to paraphrase) people keep on living, even though they know they will dies someday. I wish the spirit of Jin-Heon would seep across dramas and inspire Yeon-Jae somewhat.

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so depressing!!!

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I cracked up when I read this line: "He walks away, but then apparently a shower changes his mind. Damn that shower. I have equal love and hate for you right now."

I replayed the scene a few times to try to pause it at the right time (when the light hits and shows all his abs) but I kept missing it. Then I just decided to check out Tumblr later because you KNOW they're going to be all up on that good stuff.

I think the actress that plays Yeon Jae's mom is really good at acting out complaining and screaming scenes. It's like, wow, mom. Her character seems like she didn't emotionally mature past high school in a way when she throws tantrums.

Sae Kyung needs to get her head out of her a$$hole. She needs to realize that things are not always about her. Like the previous episode, she thought all of Yeon Jae's motives had something to do with her, getting revenge on her. She can't even process sarcasm. Granted she doesn't know what the viewer knows, but she really makes me want to punch her nose. And pluck her eyebrows. At least she doesn't have the seaweed hair anymore.

I hope the ending doesn't result in amnesia, because that is WAY too old school for this drama, and the drama really can't afford time to go down that path. Well, the drama is pretty good about going through problems quickly, but... amnesia... blah. I hope it doesn't happen. I don't think it will.

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about the mom part - actually it was painful for me to watch because mine is just like that. it's a mom thing, i think

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I think that Sae Kyung experience has honestly led her to the conclusion she reached.

Also the actress playing Sae Kyung is the living embodiment of many Indian (South Asian) painting of female beauty I've seen. Small face, huge eyes that take up a disproportionate amount of the face and well defined brown. She beautiful as is, brows and all.

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I can see I wasn't the only one wishing that instead of replying "yes that must be it" to Sae Kyung's question of "So this was your revenge?" that the reply would be "Not everything is about you, princess." Funny thing was that her real revenge was to donate the money to charity.

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Oh yes, I get stressed whenever I see the actress playing Yeon Jae's mom: she has a knack for hysterical screaming which (reminds me of my mom, shh) makes my hair stand on end every time.
Even in dramas where she's supposed to play the nice mother of the even nicer heroine, I don't get fooled, I know the screaming is coming, sooner or later >_> <_<

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I agree completely. Especially about the part where she needs to pluck her eyebrows. Seriously... they need to be shaped a little lol.

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this ep was a bit too much....she is suppose to live out the rest of her days in a positive way but she chose to live it in a hell and caused injury to the people around her...it just made me mad that humans cant seem to accept that we will all die some day and to live the best of our lives better each day....

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That's easy to say if you are not dying of cancer.

I don't think anyone can understand what it means to have your life cut short like that. And one can only be brave for so long, no? She was positive enough in the beginning, but when reality sinks in it's when depression hits, which is exactly what happened to her. Dying is the easier way out, because everything else is too painful.

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i've had 3 relatives who have died of cancer... one of them was particularly close to me... and i have seen her go through many emotional stages -- from being determined to win against cancer to being so depressed and moody about the unfairness of it all...

so from what i have been seeing in SOAW, Yoon Jae is going through very normal reactions... i just wish she finally tells her mom... there will be a lot of angst but it's not fair for her to be the last to know...

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You can tell 200 strangers that you are dying at the drop of a hat but it's most agonizing to tell your parents that you are dying. YJ wants to tell her mom but hasn't found the courage to do so.

A friend of mine took 3 months to tell her dad she has a debilitating illness (not even life-threatening). And that's even after she sought for a second opinion. The irony of it all is that his health deteriorated with no know cause. He passed away 5 months short of her wedding. Coincidence? I don't know.

I think YJ will tell her mom when she knows her mom can handle it. It also shows in her desperation to find her mom a mate. Methinks that when teacher S hooks up with mom, that's the time she'll tell her.

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Few things are sadder than a child dying before their parents. That doesn't change no matter how old you are.

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I actually think it's good that Yeon-jae is going through this period of anger and depression even if it's difficult for us to watch. It's inevitable. We're the ones who are observing her; we're not Yeon-jae. So we gotta think about what she's going through in her shoes. It's reality that keeps smacking her in the face that she's got no future: she's not gonna get married and make babies, she's not gonna need a winter coat, the list goes on. It killed me to see the photo of her in her wedding dress. She looked so sad and pathetic I just wanted to hug her and cry with her. This is a necessary evil that we had to endure and watch bc that's what happens in real life. People aren't always happy and positive. That's why I love this drama. They don't hesitate to show what real people have to endure everyday, especially real people who only have months to live. I'm sure they're not going to keep Yeon-jae's depression going on, obviously, but this episode hit the right spots for me, however painful it was to watch.
It was definitely sad to watch Yeon-jae tear up her little book in despair. She has that sure feeling that she won't be able to accomplish all those things in her bucket list and realizes how pointless it all is even though we all want her to stay positive. She's now creating a fine line between her and the world of the living and it totally sucks that Eun-seok's caring and love isn't enough to save (will it??) her or get her love in return. It's heartbreak + impending death. Gosh...heartbreak is enough to get someone depressed.
I didn't have much care for her before, but I really like Hee-joo now. She's a clear juxtaposition of Yeon-jae now since she's more experienced than Yeon-jae in terms of being diagnosed and suffering from cancer. It's like she makes me reminisce of the once-happy Yeon-jae who was still full of life and feeling positive. I hope Hee-joo doesn't die too!
This is random, but I'm happy they changed Sae-kyung's hairstyle. But I still can't stand why they make her where such short dresses that are so inappropriate as business attire. Seriously, I bet she has to make sure she's not giving an inadvertent peep show to the other actors.

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I am totally with you. Episode 11 and 12 are so necessary to show what Yeon Jae really go through. Afterall she is a woman with heart.
The fact that she has love she has been longing for her entire life in her hand, but has to let it go -- this is so painful to watch. I can't imagine if that happen to me.

Ji Wook's accusation that she is selfish especially hit her on the sour spot. She has known it, and having it proven to her is so painful. She is also pained from watching Ji Wook's pain, adding to her own fear and sorrow.

I believe part of her is happy to have been loved, but part of her is so sad that it happened because it means she hurt the one she loves.
She wants him, but she does not want him to cry for her, yet she knows he is crying now. At this point, there is already no happy way out.

I just hope that she will eventually realize that it is impossible to stop other person' heart. It is his choice to make -- whether to be with her all the way or to turn around. She should embrace his decision too to help him not regretting anything.

Saekyung dresses are definitely wayyy too short for business.

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oh...poor yon jae.....i agree with dominique, it's worse than death. but, in the end, (i'm sick to tell this) yon jae must be death, so every human being in the world, hehehe....
But, this story is about to fulfill the list, and yon jae have a change to do that, that's a gift. This drama make us rethinking again about how can we make live a beautiful life....

can't wait the next episode.......thanks girlfriday...

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I know that yeon jae is the main character and therefore the centre of pity, however i can't feel sorry for a person who let a false accusation of something 'innapropriate' happening to her come to light, inducing the firing and humilation of her teacher. Also, i've changed my bias to hee joo, yeon jae is too terrible. Even if she only has a few months to live, it isn't justified to take this kind of weight of her shoulders because she knows she's dying and wants to go without regret. This apology should have been made decades ago. and furthermore, shouldn't she have told her mother at least, if she didn't want to tell the authorities.

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That was definitely a shitty thing YJ did, but I can understand her not apologizing in the last few decades. I find that the longer you wait to apologize, the harder it is. I don't understand why, but that's just the way it is sometimes, even though it is wrong. And death is the right motivator to give you a shot of courage.

Even though YJ is the heroine, she is still human, capable of bad things even if it leaves a bad taste in our mouths.

I think YJ will tell her mother by the end. I think, in the end, she wants her mother to find happiness with someone who can take care of her and perhaps hope it will be this guy.

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"I find that the longer you wait to apologize, the harder it is. I don’t understand why, but that’s just the way it is sometimes, even though it is wrong."

...the president in City Hunter stated something similar to this very eloquently when he was talking to Yoon Sung.

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I totally understand where you're coming from. I'm also just a bit interested that they allowed such a blemish for the main heroine.

It doesnt make me hate her but I do dislike the way she lived before.

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It just means she is human like the rest of us.

And imperfects make a character more real to me.

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Imperfections I mean.

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for a child to see thru he dad go thru cancer treatments and death.. is very hard.. (cancer treatment is no joke i tell you, it not only affects the patient but their caretaker as well). thus i do understand her resentment at the teacher trying to replace her dad. she was just a kid and she has to also care for her "kid like" mother. so although i don't think what she did was all correct but i can understand her and how she was not able to apologize earlier. growing up under a single parent household is tough and most kids turn out badly (depending on each situation). she grew up losing her self-confidence and sparks after her dad died.. feeling even guilty for being happy.. that is sad for a child.

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Thanks you for that.

False accusations are horrible, they not only destroy the life of the innocent accused, but they also disturb they justice of future victims whose whose rightful accusations are viewed with suspicion.

that being said,

I'm not sure how old Yeon-Jae was when it happened
-She was a child who was just 'abandoned' by her father through cancer
-her somewhat flight mother was the only security she had and she probably was trying to keep as many changes away from her life as possible.
-and we don't know what she actually did,
--- if she lied
----or was misunderstood.
Whatever she did might have resulted in consequences that she didn't anticipate and it seems she was not able to stop or turn back those consequences. At this point we don't even know if she tried to or not..

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Actually, that whole bit kind of reminds me of the movie Atonement

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I think she was misunderstood. She didn't actually maligned the teacher. But she didn't speak up and correct the situation.

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was she a TEENAGER or a "child"?

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I don't care how old Yeonjae might have been, but you do not falsely accuse someone of sexual misconduct. Especially a teacher. Makes my blood boil.

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It was shitty of her, but everyone is human. She knows she was wrong and is trying to apologize for it. Because Yeon jae did something wrong doesn't mean she shouldn't ever be allowed to have love. It's better that she confronts all the things she's done wrong in her life rather than pretend they didn't happen.

Who is Hee joo?

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haha Hee joo is Yeon jae's roommate at the hospital! Brain fart on my part! Hee joo was way cute in this week's episodes. She needs for air time. :)

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Dear Scent of a Woman sexy times and happy moments...

Annyeong! It’s me, remember?

The one who fangirled and spazzed over you guys and adored you like crazy?

I was just wondering where you went as you have not been around lately.

I know that in both your absence you sent your cousin ANGST to keep me company instead, and though he’s cool and good there are just times (like episode 12) that he brings me such unbearable pain and heartache that i wish he would have just killed me instead.

Does he really enjoy making me cry?

Well, i hope you’d tell him he’s succeeded (BIG TIME) and i wish he’s happy now.

I really, really miss you. Enough, that i can let ANGST hang around just as long as you show your face some time.

Don’t enjoy your vacation too much okay?

I need you as a breather otherwise, i’d just shrivel up in a corner and die.

Love Sincerely,
ME

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My thoughts exactly. My old heart can't take much more of this! *sigh*

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thanks for the speedy recap! i just finished watching ep 12 and i have used tissue paper around my laptop. what a heartbreaking episode!

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this.is.soooo.sad.... arrgh No simple answers to this conflict at all!

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Suffering so much here!!! Now we gotta wait a whole week to see if YJ finally steps up...
I agree with you guys she's receiving unconditional love just like she wanted. She has to take advantage of the remaining time she has left. What's done is Done. There's no point of both suffering when they can be happy together. It will hurt but is better to know instead of wondering. He will be left behind but if they enjoy their little time together he can say his goodbyes and move on with out regrets. :(

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Thanks for the recap!!!

I was just enjoying this episode, even with YJ falling into depression (I feel like she needed to go through this stage- cuz who wouldn't be severely depressed abt dying before they've really lived their lives?), but the car accident really just tee-ed me off! I don't mind the angst over dying. But what I do mind if the continued angst between YJ and JW. I'm rooting for ES, but if YJ and JW are going to get together, please let it be soon because time is ticking! YJ deserves some happy moments! And now she's probably going to feel all guilty over JW. Maybe his dad will throw a fit and blame her for JW's accident. So will Sae-kyung! Love Seo Hyo-rim, but we need to get rid of Sae-kyung. The character is extraneous to the plot - which is about these characters trying to deal with death.

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this episode is a downer indeed.

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Oh Yeah, I think those are earrings that Yeon-Jae gives Hye-Won because Hye-won wears them on her wedding day.

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Her letter to the teacher is so poignant... I've been very brave and only have tears rimming my eyes in most of the scenes but when I read the recaps on her letter, my heart just go to ground zero...

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I have watched WAY too many dramas. My first reaction to the car accident w/ head injury was OMG! NOOO! Not amnesia! :)

I cried so much this weekend (I"m such a wuss!). That thank goodness I have a week to rehydrate! :)

On a lighter note... Check out the mv on you tube for this drama called "Insomnia". If you haven't seen it, I thought it was well done and it really cheered me up after all the trauma and drama this weekend. I'd post a link if I wasn't a complete computer moron. :)

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this whole dying together deal is not going to fly and i would rage if the writers'll go that way (altho i highly doubt it). i think the incident with JW will definetely jolt her out of her depression. she must realize that life is fleeting & people can be taken away just like that ex. the somewhat random accident. with this i hope she cherishes the time she has left and throw the noble idiocy hat she's been wearing out the window.

even tho she's going thru this resentment, "owoeisme" period which i think is realistic since not everyone will just be so accepting of such a thing... it just breaks my heart to witness her metamorphesis from a doormat to iamwomanhearmeroaruslapmeislapyouback&takeurman&livelifetothefullest into a miserable :'( noble idot.

i agree with bringing on the happy. because my tear ducts are tired.

poopy seok... how i love thee. the patient who has the mad crush on him is adorable. her reaction when his name was called for the tango was precious.

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I was planning to watch this drama once it's finished, but reading the recaps.. I think I better not. Too many angst I don't think I can handle it >.<

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me, too. though i'd love to see more of wookie. but it's so depressing. i don't want to see both he and sun ah cry buckets full of tears every single episode.

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Same here. I thank everyone for their recaps and insightful comments, because there is no way I am watching these episodes. Real life has tears enough...it is a lucky person who can cry for someone in a drama.

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Try to watch this when you are so happy with things that is going on with your life, then that will lessen the pain, but if you watch this with a heavy heart, you might get a heart attack, but U know, not watching this could make you feel you missed something wonderful or like you haven`t tasted the most delicious food on earth. Think about it...be brave enough....lol!

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Such an unfair drama. I cant even hope that the good doctor gets with the other love interest because she's dying too.

There is no happy ending in this drama which only breaks my heart even more. It's too close to reality, :(

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Thanks for the recap.

I already watched episode 12. I have been waiting for the recap to get what I thought I saw.

Red cars almost always signal trouble.

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Thank you for the recap!

Another sad sad episode. When will there be if any happiness in this drama?
Great drama so far even if it's sad but gosh, at least have a bit of happy thoughts would help. It's just sooo depressing this episode.

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I'm hoping that this was the emotional nadir of this drama. I hope that seeing KJW almost die makes LYJ remember how precious life is, and enjoy the rest of the time she has left. Because there are only 4 more episodes!

I'm with you GF, I thought her explanation of survivor's guilt made me a lot more sympathetic to her Noble Idiocy. She's seen the whole cancer thing from both sides now; I can't imagine dealing with that, period, much less with any grace.

I like that they are two flawed people going through something and growing. It feels realistic despite ... the drama-ish-ness of it all. But I really hope it picks up at least a leeetle bit next week.

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To be honest, I do not see why Eun Seok is in love with Jeon Jae. He is grateful for what she had done for him in their childhood days and that makes her a little special to him. He likes her, is attracted to her, but that is not love. From what I see, he is a good friend who treats Jeon Jae well and worries for her, because, ultimately, she is special. Perhaps, in a different situation, if she were healthy, his feelings for her might develop further. But right now, I think he is doing a good job staying by her side as a loyal friend. If Yeon Jae hadn't pushed Ji Wook away, it will be Ji Wook doing the job in Eun Seok's place. Eun Seok is there because Jeon Jae doesn't want Ji Wook to see her die. I am not saying I dislike Eun Seok, in fact, I find him really endearing and I was impressed when he didn't take advantage of the situation and try to pull Jeon Jae further away from Ji Wook. But whenever I see comments rooting for Eun Seok instead of Ji Wook, I just can't stay calm anymore!

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but the same argument can be made with Jiwook YeaonJae

How Long has he known her?
how fast can it develop into love?

In this drama we're supposed to believe YJ fell for JW at first sight

Personally of all four characters if find Dr.Eun Seok to be the most endearing

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I have to agree with ami.

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But Ji wook and Yeon Jae have shared many deep personal moments talking about their parents and past memories and struggles. Ji wook was able to open up to her about his mom and her passing and the relationship he has with his dad. They've been to Wando together and the process Ji wook went through while there (finding his time capsule etc.) is really important. Also JW and YJ have had a mutual sexual attraction that they've played out to a certain extent, being romantic, dating, kissing and being affectionate towards each other.

Yeon jae and Eun seok are close, but their relationship revolves solely around her illness. Who are Eun seok's parents/family and what kind of relationship does he have with them? Does YJ know? What are his personal struggles that he shares with YJ? When have they dated or experienced some palpable physical attraction? ES has missed YJ, but when has he ever stood outside her house longing for her?

I think Yeon jae is an extremely important person for Eun seok, but I'm not convinced he's in *romantic* love with her. If she were healthy I think he could let himself fall in love with her, but since he knows about and is treating her cancer, I feel like he's actively keeping his emotions in check. Love, but not *in* love.

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Spot on, your analysis of the relationships of YJ and her 2 guys ! Good job.

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OHH MYY!
when i saw the last screen cap i had to gasp.
but really thanks for the recap. you guys are awesomee.

and they better not die together. that will be the point when i say "hell with you drama''

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Gahhhh!!!!! I cant deal with how depressing this ep is!!!! Hope next week will be better!!

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Will really hate if they killed JW, he really has no reason to die.

It willbe even more ridiculous if ES finds a cure for her cancer overnight.

This drama has to end, and if there is an open ending, it wont be good.

As they say, we need to enjoy the journey and not be anxious of the destination, this is one such drama, were the ending seems obvious, but i feel all of us are curious as to how the director is going to take us there.

I watched My name is kim sam soon , where YJ played the lead role, she did have some comedy scenes in there, but this show seems to be very heavy,and somehow i get the feeling that she has been crying constantly in the last few episodes or she has this constant expression that she has been wrong.

I do not know if there is a chance to expand her spectrum of emotions, if not, i feel the director has not completely utlized her talent. my 2 cents.

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Will really hate if they killed JW, he really has no reason to die.

It willbe even more ridiculous if ES finds a cure for her cancer overnight.

This drama has to end, and if there is an open ending, it wont be good.

As they say, we need to enjoy the journey and not be anxious of the destination, this is one such drama, were the ending seems obvious, but i feel all of us are curious as to how the director is going to take us there.

I watched My name is kim sam soon , where YJ played the lead role, she did have some comedy scenes in there, but this show seems to be very heavy,and somehow i get the feeling that she has been crying constantly in the last few episodes or she has this constant expression that she has been wronged.

I do not know if there is a chance to expand her spectrum of emotions, if not, i feel the director has not completely utlized her talent. my 2 cents.

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There are moments when I think this show is brilliant. Like the wedding dress scene, or ES tango-ing his way down the hospital hall. Those quiet little beats are when this drama shines. But then it goes Kdrama cliche with long-suffering heroines, Noble Idiots, super-bitch second females, egotistical chaebol parents hurling insults, Big Misunderstandings, and now even a car accident. This is when the drama starts to lose me. It doesn't seem necessary. Like a super-size order of angst. No thanks, just a regular size will suit me fine. I hope next week we get to see more of what made this drama so special in the first place.

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Yes! You took the words right out of my mouth.

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One of the best comments here.......... totally agreeing.

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Aaaaaaaaaw, this damn episode was so freaking Sad (capital S). Mom, I hate you a lot sometimes, but my heart breaks for you because I know you love Yeon-jae and I know how much it'll hurt for you when it's time for you to know her secret.

Yes. Really. Someone do something to make everyone happy.

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Yes, agree. Give us scenes like that hot tango, the tent kiss and that lovely bike kiss, even the blowing of JW's finger, presenting himself as a gift to YJ. Ooh, those are such sweet sweet scenes. We will be happy then.

Thanks for the beautiful recap, girlfriday.

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Wow everyone has a lot to say about this episode. I, on the other hand, am going off on a tangent to rank. I am so sick and tired of every k-drama protagonist going to the fracking Han river to wallowing in whatever pity party they are throwing that week. So sick in fact that I officially hate this River, it is dead to me, die Han river die! Since nothing forthcoming ever happens at this river, I have started fast forwarding through these scenes, the down side is, ha who am I kidding there is no downside to fast forwarding through this crap. Is there some South Korean law that states that every drama has to feature a shot from the river of doom and despair? Phew I feel so much better now.

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could be that filming by the Han River gives you beautiful scenery, little permit expense, and is a relatively cheap outdoor shoot.

Could be the studio is right next door and they camera man doesn't have to leave the building to do the shoot, just point the camera out the window.

Could be they don't have a location scout or the location scout is lazy.

Could be . . .

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So true! NOTHING good ever happens at that river - people get beat up, or they break up, or they plan something illegal, or they think about suicide and wallow in aloneness - truly, half that river must be tears.

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Hopefully the accident isnt serious. :(

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I assume the accident won't be serious and that it will work as a cosmic thunk on the head for Yeon-Jae.

Unfortunately my IRONIC hormones are jumping all over the place, thinking how twisted it would be if Ji-wook predecease Yeon-Jae. You are working so hard to avoid the tractor trailer truck you see heading your way that you don't notice the bicycle coming behind you that eventually takes you out.

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I will not be able to handle that crap. I do not need ~A Story Sadder than Sadness~ thank you very much! This needs to go a Flowers for my Life/49 days route.

Death is painful and sad, but life persist and so must we! Yeon Jae Fighting!

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Thanks for the recap!

Writer/PD, have pity on KSA and LDW, they can be dehydrated from crying in every scene. Don`t over do it!
Though episode 11-12 are just great..mind you, you drained every single fluid in my body.

Just start in a lighter mode for the next episode.
Enough of the bitter part, now let us taste the sweet part of this drama. i hope you can come up with an original ending that we can remember even years have passed.
Just like in MNIKSS and CH!

I still wishing for a wedding and honeymoon of our lovely couple!

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@ GF..."Yeon-jae gives her a brooch that she’s been wanting for a long time."

It`s a pair of earrings not brooch.

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It was hard to tell during the scene itself. That they're earrings doesn't get clarified until just before the wedding. If I remember correctly, GF writes these recaps as she watches.

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I read somewhere that KSA fainted on set. I don't know if it is true, but I would be surprised. ROK has to treat their television actors better.

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Yes it`s true, but briefly according to KSA...

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The only way I'm getting through this is watching without subs. That was I get to distance myself from the pain. Argh. This is ENTERTAINMENT folks! It's supposed to be LIGHT! you promised! ARGH.
They have one last chance. One more Ep of pointless angsting and I'm DROPPING this show. ARGH.

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sooo I'm wondering where all the happy went?

I watched this without subs early in the morning and though I understand next to nothing I was feeling depressed because I could sense the Noble Idiotic-ness pulsing out of Yeon Jae. HOwever I every time I saw Eun Seok and Ji Wook I'd be wanting to cry for them, even when JW was with Royal Bitch because I could feel his despondency over the YJ situation. aah I'm looking for the happy, the uplifting version of SOAW...

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I must say when I see how Eun Seok cares for her my heart actually hearts.

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u min hurts?????

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lol yes

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As much as I dislike all the angst the past 3 episodes have been transmitting, the drama is actually reflecting the reality of life.

Put oneself in YJ's shoes - if you are given just 6 months (or even less!) to live and to lose every on your last breath, how would you feel? She had started out wanting to live her life to the fullest but never did she expect that it would bring her more heartache along the way. Her wanting not to let people around her especially those closest and dearest to her know about her condition is her expression of love to them. She doesn't want them to see her life seeping away like the often heard metaphor "hammering a nail in the heart” . She wants to leave them when she is still her - healthy, happy, pretty YJ.

I have seen relatives and friends having to watch their love ones battle with cancer and to see their life ebbing away. The patient themselves suffer both physically and mentally and they go through prolonged stages of denial and depression.

This drama is attempting to display the emotional rollercoaster ride the patient and her love ones albeit a condensed one. I think the production team and actors have done a damn good job so far! As for the actors, I think it's even more emotionally draining to keep having to act such depressing roles ... check out KSA and LDW interviews

Kudos to them!

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Well said.

There are 2 categories of viewers when watching a drama. One set will be the ones from the outside looking in. The other set are the ones from the inside looking out. From the comments here, you can obviously tell which is which.

I've seen cancer patients turn into human monsters just so that they have their loved ones hating them at the very end. They think that will help in making the final parting less painful. Noble idiocy or warped thinking whatever. Must be hard for people who are dying to think straight especially when they are in their prime.

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I think part of cancer patients lashing out is that it's difficult to continually accept love at the end of life. It's painful. All that love calls attention to what you are leaving behind and makes it that much more painful and difficult for the person dying. When you die you die alone even with all your love one's around at the end you're the only one leaving.

So I think it's often actually about the cancer patient rather than their concern for others. This is why I don't think it's noble idiocy, but a kind of warped psychological self-preservation in the guise of noble idiocy. I think that it's acceptable and should be expected to act like that when death is right in front of you. Life and death are shitty and hard and you won't live up to *every* aspect of your ideal self....so no need to try to be a saint. Anyway saints are already dead.

Look at Ji wook and Yeon jae. Who is the one who doesn't want to be in a relationship? Yeon jae. Ji wook is still in shock over her revelation, but Yeon jae hasn't really asked him what he wants to do. When Ji wook was talking to Hae won in his office, he said that it's Yeon jae who wants them to be apart. Granted not much time has passed, but Yeon jae made the decision for him about their relationship because *she* doesn't want him to see her dying. It's about what she wants for Ji wook. So it's not necessarily some noble act, idiotic or not.

Yeon jae is doing the same with her mom. Yes, mom is a bit weak, but it's Yeon jae who can't handle bringing that pain to her mom. Yeon jae doesn't know how her mom would react. Yeon jae was talking about the guilt and pain she felt while her father was sick, wondering if it was ok for her to laugh with her friends etc. She went through that pain and anger towards her father, but she got through it and continued to live and so did her mom.

Yeon jae's decisions about her relationship with Ji wook and revealing her cancer to her mom are about her, Yeon jae, and her desire not to deal with the pain of that situation being her last memories. It's not about sparring other's but herself and that's ok in my book.

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Too much melodrama, seriously SOaW, you lost me with these last two episodes of back-to-back misery. What happened to the balance between happy fun sexy comedy times and realistic cancer drama?

Since everyone's already talked about Yeon Jae, Eun Seok, and Ji Wook, I have to mention even Hye Won's wedding depressed me with how defeated to her fate she seemed. 'A baby? Guess I have no choice.'

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Same here. SOAW was steaming along nicely until the middle of episode 11 and then it just went downhill since then.

Maybe because I can't deal with all the SAD or just because I just can't get on board with the 'I'll hurt him now so I won't hurt him later' crap that YJ is pulling. Everyone acknowledges that her time is short, so there's no point in wasting it in complete misery. So far, she's given JW a little bit of the HAPPY (uh... 1 and 1/2 episoides) and a lot of the SAD... needs to reverse that so at least he has a lot of good memories of her before she passes. I say, bring back the happy... NOW.

I've also read that alot of this drama was suppose to be set in Australia? Did I read wrong or are they gonna jet off somewhere and live happy for the last 4 episodes?? I hope so. I hope the writers reverts back to the bucket list and a happier YJ with JW who completes the list together. I think that depite the stellar performances, there is only so much angst/ despair that the audience can watch before they switch off.

Even if she is to die in the end... I hope it is written to be thematically closer to 'Flowers for my life' which actually left an uplifting message rather that going memorable but super depressing like 'Love Contract' (Taiwanese Drama), which left me shell shocked for days.

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