EPISODE 359. Broadcast on November 6, 2011.
javabeans: So Tae-woong is put on dishwashing duty, which takes a while. When he finishes, Na PD comments, like a restaurant owner talking about a busboy, “This guy’s good. Where’d you find him?”
girlfriday: It’s just extra funny because he’s running around calling Tae-woong “hyung,” and then assessing him like a donkey for hire.
javabeans: Seung-gi comments about the time crawling by today, and Na PD notes that they’ve got a bit of free time today. I wonder if they didn’t prepare enough, or if the dinner cooking/gaming process sped by too quickly, because the staff convenes to think up more activities for the evening. Inside, the members brainstorm for ideas too.
girlfriday: It might be a rain thing? Or maybe Na PD’s in a weirdly lackadaisical mood. I mean, let the boys come up with their own game?
javabeans: Ji-won proposes a game: You streeeeetch up with your arms…then lie down. It’s the Sleeping Game!
girlfriday: I rest my case.
javabeans: The guys start feeling hungry again and call out to Na PD for ramyun and coffee possibilities. Soon there’s a chorus of “Director, director!” Tae-woong wants a toothbrush because he forgot his, and it’s sort of hilarious how he isn’t even trying to be polite and meek. He’s just, “Yo, Director! Gimme a toothbrush!” I’m sure it helps that the director calls him hyung.
girlfriday: They’re so whiny, like five little boys bugging Dad because they’ve got cabin fever. I love it.
javabeans: Seung-gi wonders, “Should we make a game out of calling out, ‘Director’? Let’s just keep calling him for any little thing.” Ha, I like this Annoy Na PD game.
girlfriday: It would be extra annoying (and therefore effective) if Ho-dong were here. He has the best full-grown man to whiny child ratio.
javabeans: Seung-gi calls out that they’ve got a game, and Na PD perks up, all ears… until Seung-gi starts explaining, and then Na PD shuts the door in his face. Haha. Tae-woong calls out, “Director! Marry me off!” “Director!” “Ramyun!” “Coffee!” Na PD: “Why are you just asking for stuff?” Tae-woong: “Director, I’ll pay you.”
girlfriday: Aw, something about the way they mess with Na PD just makes them seem like one big happy family.
javabeans: Finally, Su-geun comes up with an idea that picks up some interest: Identify each other by breath. Ewww. Is this what happens when you put boys together and give them too much time on their hands? I enjoy that the soundtrack is “Smells Like Teen Spirit.”
girlfriday: Groooooooss. Seung-gi actually volunteers to be the first smeller (smellee?) and covers his eyes. One whiff of Tae-woong’s breath sends him reeling, but hey, he identifies him immediately. I’m gonna go ahead and say that being identified by breath is not the most flattering way to be recognized. Though it DOES open up the question of how close you have to be, bromantically, to identify each other by breath.
javabeans: A brief montage shows us the guys breathing on each other and then recoiling in revulsion, ending with the concern that this probably won’t make it to air. Take 2 involves a round of petty violence (feet slapping, forehead flicking), with the caption that the show’s just inviting complaints about the violence.
girlfriday: What’s hilarious is that it seems that the “game” part of it is to reply to your attacker, “Thank you very much!” after he hits you. Pfft. Boys.
javabeans: Jong-min gets the idea to try a variation on the Elephant Trunk game (you make a trunk with your arms, then spin in circles), and Su-geun revises it to suggest a hybrid Elephant Trunk Dart Game, where you spin in circles till you’re dizzy, then try to hit a bulls-eye with your trunk. Ha, these games are so lame. It’s like peeking behind the curtain to see these guys trying to figure out what will be entertaining, instead of just cutting straight to the entertaining.
girlfriday: I like seeing their process, because the question isn’t what’s an entertaining game to play, but an entertaining game to watch. Su-geun demonstrates and they agree that it’s funny, so they prep the game themselves.
javabeans: Su-geun MC’s the event, which he announces as the Small Room Olympics. Ha. And the song, naturally, is “Hand in Hand” from the Seoul Olympics.
girlfriday: That’s it in a nutshell, right? The We’re Stuck in This Five By Five Room Due to Weather Olympics.
javabeans: The boys file into the Small Room holding their index fingers like torches, and Tae-woong literally wonders as he’s doing this, “What the hell am I doing?” Su-geun proceeds to introduce the event, which he declares a form of Index Finger Appreciation and Awareness. Pffffffft. I wish I could translate all of Su-geun’s puns, but I guess they don’t all work. He’s so witty on the fly, though.
girlfriday: He’s cracking me up. I especially like shi-sohn (hand ceremony), to officially open up the games.
javabeans: Jong-min’s the first to go, spinning ten times and then pointing his finger at the wall, managing to score….0 points. At least he got on the paper at all, because for a moment there it looked like he was gonna stick the VJ in the corner. Tae-woong goes next (getting some spinning help from Seung-gi, to make him go faster) and misses the wall entirely, falling to the ground. It looks like he hit his head so Jong-min asks in concern, “Are you okay, hyung?” Tae-woong scrunches his face, “I’m fine but I’m embarrassed as hell!”
girlfriday: Anything less from Dog Feet would’ve been disappointing, really.
javabeans: Su-geun introduces Ji-won next, who he describes as the silver medalist in their last fictional elephant-trunk-target competition, losing out to Seung-gi. Alas, he has a history of drug doping, and is currently under suspicion for excessive use of vitamins. Ha, Su-geun cracks me up when he’s being random and off-the-cuff.
girlfriday: I love Ji-won’s reaction to finding out his fictional athlete self lost out on the gold medal due to doping. Heh.
javabeans: Ji-won scores 2 points, and then it’s Su-geun’s turn. He does a whole practice bit, and then ends up turned completely in the wrong direction.
girlfriday: I love the whole X-files sequence that points out there’s something wrong with his practice theory (of spinning left and then heading right). Clips of all the other guys also spinning counterclockwise… and sure enough, he does the same, and nearly mistakes Jong-min’s face for the dartboard.
javabeans: Seung-gi, the “Index Finger King,” gets prepped for his round…and then soils the wallpaper with his red fingerprint, missing the target. The scoreboard flashes: 2 points, 0 points, 0 points, disqualified, disqualified. What a bummer of an Olympics.
girlfriday: Hahaha. They edit in clips of Seung-gi’s weight-lifting from the last episode set to sad music. All that training… gone to waste. Ji-won wins the gold medal (Seung-gi’s cooking stopwatch) and gets his winning finger tied with a ribbon (which I’m pretty sure is made of toilet paper), as he bows.
javabeans: They file out singing “Hand in Hand,” wrapping up the end of this Olympic cycle…and then Su-geun turns right around and declares that four years have passed, so now it’s time to revisit the games. Caption: “Youngwol Gajung Village, thrilled to host two consecutive Olympics!”
girlfriday: HA. The idea of the game itself isn’t that funny (minus the sight gags) but the commentary from Su-geun is cracking me up.
javabeans: This time they come in flaunting their big toes, because apparently the game has evolved since the last quadrennial. Seung-gi scores 2 points, saying he managed due to all the training he’s done, while Jong-min says, “I’ve lived almost entirely using my feet” since the last Olympics.
girlfriday: At least Seung-gi’s flying kick makes up for the pitiful showing in the finger olympics. Omg, Jong-min’s attempt to recreate the jump kick is priceless. He lands flat on his ass, legs stretched out to high heaven, like a cartoon.
javabeans: Ji-won’s next, and dude, has that boy always had such pretty legs?
girlfriday: Whoa, they’re so shapely, and toned. He’s also pointing his toe something fierce, so he pretty much looks like a ballerina. Too bad pretty doesn’t earn him any points. Haha, I’m pretty sure they lower the dartboard for Su-geun’s turn, but he fails to make contact with it anyway. And then Tae-woong takes the cake, with his super earnest “AJA!” as he kicks his toe as far as it’ll go… gettin’ nuthin’ but air.
javabeans: This time the scoreboard reads: 2 points, DQ, DQ, DQ, DQ. Ha. Who knew such a lame game could be so entertaining? That’s the whole charm of this show, though, which really is about giving the personalities a platform to be hilarious.
girlfriday: Because last place is a four-way tie, they decide to do a final round to declare the loser, with a new rule — while they spin, Seung-gi moves the dartboard anywhere he wants. What? I don’t think making this game any harder is the way to break this tie. On Tae-woong’s turn, he spins and Seung-gi puts the board in the far right corner, causing Tae-woong to bust out swearing. HA. Well it’s really the grumblings of an almost-swear, eh-ra-ee-sshi, which the captions transliterate as L.I.C. Hehehe.
javabeans: Suuure, he’s not swearing, he’s just…spouting a random, nonsense acronym! Ha. Way to get around standards and practices for that one. I love that Seung-gi asks Su-geun to demonstrate how high he can kick for reference, and it looks like Su-geun’s on a shin-attacking mission. So everyone fails and Seung-gi’s announced the winner, and crowned…with a roll of masking tape.
girlfriday: After the olympics, it’s bath time, which consists of dousing each other with cold water, and giving each other shampoos. Ji-won demonstrates his one-step process of washing his face and then using the foam to lather the rest of his head, which Seung-gi takes issue with. But I’m thinking we should be grateful he’s washing at all.
javabeans: I know, think of the head you have to sleep next to. Ya want it to be clean or not?
girlfriday: And then when it’s Seung-gi’s turn to be shampooed, Ji-won decides he’s going to make him do push-ups into the bucket of water, leading to a hilarious shampoo-as-training-montage, replete with “Eye of the Tiger.” Gah, I know I say this all the time, but I friggin’ love this show.
javabeans: Omg, it’s so random and hilarious. Ji-won’s the drill sergeant, and makes Seung-gi chant along to a round of: “Hair!” (Down.) “Wash!” (Up.) Rinse and repeat. (Literally. Snerk.)
girlfriday: While the boys have some more downtime in the room, Su-geun sneaks out to make a secret deal with Na PD. Hm. Nefarious dealings? But it turns out it’s for the greater good. Su-geun strikes a wager with Na PD that he can guess how any of the other members would act, in a given situation. Situation 1: If someone comes in and spills coffee on Jong-min’s leg, Su-geun guarantees that the first words out of his mouth will be: “Ah, it’s okay, it’s okay.” If he’s right, ramyun for all.
javabeans: Hehe. Na PD sounds nervous: “What if Jong-min gets mad?” Su-geun assures him he’ll assume responsibility for the whole thing. If he’s wrong, Su-geun gives up indoor sleeping rights.
girlfriday: HA. They edit in a clip sequence introducing Jong-min like he’s a featured animal on National Geographic. In this creature’s natural habitat…
javabeans: How much do I love that when the test begins, the captions point out that Jong-min is “in the middle of a truly boring nonsense quiz”? Hahaha.
girlfriday: Su-geun enters the room and then the coffee gets handed off and spilled on Jong-min. He jumps back, and then says… “Oh! It’s okay!” He follows it up with a bunch more It’s okay’s, and then Su-geun goes running out to claim their ramyun.
javabeans: It’s so sweet that this test basically shows that Jong-min’s a nice guy. And that clearly everyone knows each other enough to know stuff like this about each other.
girlfriday: Na PD argues on a technicality, that the second “It’s okay” came after a huge delay. Su-geun says fine, he can prove his powers a second time. Situation 2: someone will eat something in the room, and within 2 minutes, Ji-won will ask for some. This time it’s double or nothing, with ramyun and indoor sleeping rights on the line.
javabeans: I think Na PD’s denial is really grasping at straws — he waited too long? that’s it? — but I’m game for a Round 2. So the producers take on the challenge, leading to another National Geographic-like montage of Ji-won eating things.
girlfriday: Sure enough, within one minute of a chocolate snack’s appearance in Ji-won’s line of sight, he’s waving at the PD to hand it over. I love that he’s not even like, “Please can I have some?” It’s more like, Gimme, give it here! Na PD concedes the win, and the other boys stare confused, as Su-geun explains how he scored sleepytime indoors and a midnight snack on top of it.
javabeans: I’m tickled that you can actually SEE the moment Ji-won sees the Kit-Kat and wants some. I know that the gulping sound is totally added in, but you can literally see him gulp. Ha. And the group’s bafflement is just icing on the cake. Like, whaaaa?
girlfriday: They’re given three packets of ramyun as promised, and Seung-gi and Ji-won complain that it’s not enough. They wonder how they can wheedle two more, and Ji-won offers an impromptu live concert by Seung-gi, with the hyungs as background dancers. Pwahahaha. I don’t even know what anyone else is doing, because I can’t stop staring at Ji-won, who’s doing inappropriate things to Seung-gi’s right side.
javabeans: It’s like Su-geun turned into a rapper with his beatboxing, and Ji-won into the rap video girl.
girlfriday: The PD argues that Tae-woong spent the whole time hiding behind Seung-gi and not dancing, and he challenges angrily that he WAS TOO dancing, she just didn’t see! It happens to be the same PD who was his debate opponent, so the boys quickly declare this a new topic of debate, and GO! Tae-woong: “I was doing this the entire time!” *jiggly jelly leg shake* Ha. She bursts into laughter and he’s declared the winner.
javabeans: I love when Tae-woong gets all worked up about stuff. He has two modes: Shy or Demanding, no in-between, and no transition between them.
girlfriday: Then they sit around the pot of boiling water, and have a debate on the one topic every Korean person’s got an opinion on: the proper way to cook ramyun. Jong-min: “We should put pepper flakes in this ramyun.” Su-geun (very sure of himself): “No, you can’t put pepper flakes in this ramyun!” Seung-gi: “Pepper flakes are good in this ramyun.” Su-geun (without missing a beat): “Really~?” LOL.
javabeans: Damn, now I want ramyun. Between this show and Flower Boy Ramyun Shop, I swear, I’m just gonna have to live with ramyun face for the foreseeable future.
girlfriday: They get ready for bed and the boys give Ji-won crap for his puffy silver jacket which they say he wears too much, or makes him look like a space boy, or what have you, and he just answers, “But I’m an Eun-sshi!” As in, his last name is Eun, aka silver. Heh.
javabeans: He’s just unflappable, which makes me wonder what it would be like to see him truly flustered and out of his element. He has this way of rolling with everything that makes you think he’s never embarrassed.
girlfriday: Na PD tells them it’s time to set the stage for their morning mission, and then he has them play rock-paper-scissors without any explanation. They play, and Seung-gi loses. He gets “a gift,” a yellow slip of paper that reads: “I will do it all.” Hm, that sounds like morning slave rights to me. Na PD explains that Seung-gi will sleep with that note somewhere on his person, and then at morning roll call, whoever wakes up with it in his pocket makes breakfast while the other guys get to sleep in. Hee.
javabeans: That’s kind of evilly brilliant, no? Because you could have Seung-gi up all night just trying to get rid of the note, and everyone else trying to stay up or get up early to prevent being the patsy.
girlfriday: The suspicious back-and-forth begins, as Seung-gi plots his mode of attack, while the rest of the boys figure out ways to defend themselves, like turning their pockets inside-out. Tae-woong decides to put his pants on inside-out altogether, while Ji-won ties his pockets together like a chastity belt or something.
javabeans: Cut to: Seung-gi sitting up, observing his prey, trying to strategize. The night vision turns on, and Jong-min is all fidgety and paranoid, bolting up whenever he thinks Seung-gi’s going to attack.
girlfriday: We fast-forward to morning, and Na PD comes in for the wake-up call. He counts to ten, and then starts with Seung-gi, since he’s sure to have gotten rid of the thing. Seung-gi turns out his pockets one by one… and out comes the yellow slip of paper! What? How did he end up with it? They ask if he legitimately fell asleep, and he swears that he didn’t, and looks more confused than anyone. He turns to Ji-won: “But I gave it to you…”
javabeans: Flashback time. They show the hand-off, with Ji-won taking the slip of paper from Seung-gi in the middle of the night. But he gave it to Su-geun… didn’t he? Su-geun protests that he doesn’t know about it, and just slept. They edit this like a big scary mystery movie, trying to get to the bottom of it.
girlfriday: The awesome part is, it really IS a mystery, because no one is copping to the crime. There’s zero “I did it! Neener!” and everyone’s denying left and right. Ji-won shook hands with Seung-gi, not once, but twice — at night before sleeping, and then again at 7 in the morning, at which time Seung-gi’s pockets were empty. He asks Seung-gi now, “Have you ever shaken my hand and then been betrayed?”
javabeans: And then, the camera catches Ji-won and Su-geun shaking hands, behind Seung-gi’s back. Another flashback shows Ji-won getting up early in the morning… and putting it into Su-geun’s pocket. Su-geun denies knowing anything since he sleeps like a log, so how did it get out of his pocket, then? And then the camera pans over to Jong-min’s face, while a caption points out the odd look on his face, although he’s perfectly expressionless. Was this some mass conspiracy? Hee.
girlfriday: I wouldn’t put it past Su-geun to just lie, but then he seems strangely convincing. Ji-won’s more suspicious because we know he had it and was awake at various times, but then why would he move it, if he gave it to Su-geun?
javabeans: Seung-gi is completely flummoxed, which is so entertaining. He leaves the room to begin breakfast duties, but he can’t stop puzzling over it. Na PD: “I think you just fell asleep, Seung-gi!”
girlfriday: And then more of the puzzle: Seung-gi says he woke up again and asked Ji-won where it was. He motioned over to Su-geun and when Seung-gi went to reach for it to make sure, Ji-won stopped him, not wanting to wake anyone yet. Na PD says he was played by Ji-won, 100%.
javabeans: Jong-min is under the covers trying to sleep, and he explains he didn’t get much sleep during the night. Seung-gi’s eyes bug out: “What?!” New suspect! More flashbacks show Jong-min getting up at various points in the night, checking his pockets repeatedly to make sure he was safe, checking Seung-gi’s pockets, and eventually ending up on the other side of the room. He seems more worried that he would have been the victim than a plotter out to get someone else.
girlfriday: It’s pretty hilarious how many times he gets up and checks, completely paranoid. I love that this is like Clue! If he didn’t commit the crime, did he witness anything? Did no one sleep through the night?
javabeans: Then they ask Tae-woong if he woke up at all, and he says he vaguely recalls waking once and noticing that it was raining. Seung-gi immediately corroborates: “I think I heard that!” Tae-woong: “But I said it internally.” Oh, Seung-gi. What makes this sequence so funny is that everyone’s dead tired and half-asleep, so you can’t even clock their reactions as weird or suspicious, because everyone’s just sleepy.
girlfriday: HA. It’s like Sleepy Clue with a sleepy detective. It drives Seung-gi crazy, but after all that, still no one will confess to the crime. He schleps to the kitchen to make breakfast, and asks for two things, of course: the internet and a timer. Na PD hands him a phone but warns that the connection is spotty, and then someone chimes in that it works in front of the doghouse. Cut to Seung-gi warily approaching the dog, trying to catch a wi-fi signal.
javabeans: It’s like something out of a sitcom, I swear. He’s crouching in front of the house, edging away from the Beware of Dog sign, hurriedly reading the recipe aloud while the dog just smiles at him.
girlfriday: And THEN it’s followed by a trip to the chicken coop, where he can barely screw up the nerve to run inside to gather up a few eggs… and in his confusion, he lets a chicken loose. Oh NO. Then off he goes, chasing the chicken all over the farm to try and wrangle it back. Man, you can’t even write this stuff, City Boy’s Farm Adventures.
javabeans: Dude, that chicken prances out of there all, “I’m freeeeeeee!” It’s hilarious. He’s such a city slicker, all “Guys, I don’t wanna fight. No pecking me, okay?” and “What’s the chicken’s name?” Oh boy. Nobody tell him where that chicken he ate last night came from.
girlfriday: He brings breakfast in for his hyungs, and re-wakes them. Ji-won mumbles something incoherent in an annoyed tone. Seung-gi asks him to repeat it, and it turns out he’s practically crying because he’s so moved that Seung-gi cooked for his hyungs. Ha, did he forget the whole mystery game thing?
javabeans: The one where he (very likely) conspired to make Seung-gi lose, you mean?
girlfriday: He’s either really good at covering his tracks to the very end, or he’s already forgotten. As he eats, Seung-gi can’t help but jab: “Ji-won hyung, is the food going down?” As in, is your conscience letting you swallow my food? Heh.
javabeans: Tae-woong: “It’s yummy, it’s like my mother’s soup!” Su-geun: “Is your mother not a very good cook?”
girlfriday: They pack up and pull themselves back across the river, to head home.
javabeans: And now…to confirm the mystery culprit. We resume footage in the morning hours, when Ji-won scratches Tae-woong’s neck, which gets him to wake up. He looks around, then settles back to bed…and then gets up. Cut to: Sly smile on Tae-woong’s face, in the morning when everyone’s trying to figure out what happened.
girlfriday: No… it can’t be! Tae-woong? Really?
javabeans: It’s always the quiet ones, yeah? He had left the room, then come back and stood watching everyone sleep for a long moment. Seriously, it’s creepy with the horror-movie soundtrack the production is laying over the video, proving that the difference between humor and horror is just a matter of editing. Tae-woong had seen the note sticking out of Su-geun’s pocket, and transferred it to Seung-gi’s. And then he went to sleep smiling. HAHA.
girlfriday: Oh my goodness, I’m totally creeped out. I also can’t believe that Su-geun and Ji-won were actually both telling the truth. It didn’t seem possible because one of them would have to be lying if Su-geun had it last, but apparently, he really did sleep through the whole night. Crazy.
javabeans: The PDs watch this on their monitors and gasp, “He’s Keyser Soze! His expression is the scariest out of everything.”
girlfriday: He totally Keyser-Sozed them all!