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Thing vs. Thing: Vampires in Dramaland

Here’s Round 2 in the battle of Thing vs. Thing, where we pit… things… against… things… It’s all right there in the title for a reason! Last time, we took a look at the plights of a common recent character type—the time-traveler—and this time we’re lookin’ at a different breed (literally, hur) of hero: the vampire. Apples versus oranges, go! Let the battle begin.

 
javabeans: Which vampire would you rather be, idol or prosecutor?

girlfriday: But that’s no contest.

javabeans: Totally. Idol right?

girlfriday: What??

javabeans: Well, if you’re an idol, you get to hang out with pretty idol girls and walk safely in the daylight, just listenin’ to your K-pop.

girlfriday: If imma be a creature of the night, I’m going with badass, all the way. Prosecutor, hands down.

javabeans: But you’re all tortured and conflicted. Plus there’s that whole grieving-for-your-dead-sister and the dangerous job and the frame jobs and the injustice.

girlfriday: But brooding is part of the territory. You’re a vampire. It’s in the job description.

javabeans: Then isn’t it more awesome that the idol version gets to flout all that expected broodiness and just skip to the part where they hang out and date girls and have funny bromantic escapades?

girlfriday: I think Vampire Prosecutor had plenty of bromantic escapades, if you’ll remember.

javabeans: AND THEN HE DRANK HIM. If you’ll remember.

girlfriday: Did he?

javabeans: Admittedly it was the side friend, not the main one. Fact remains: drinky. He was the one who was all, Here, have my blood. I’m doing penance or whatever. I’m paraphrasing.

girlfriday: Oh yeah. But that’s the risk with vampiric attachments, even of the bromantic variety.

javabeans: Let’s break this down then. Vampire “turning” moments. Hot prosecutor man had to die in the rain, attacked by the big scary ubervamp in the hood. Idol boys got born that way. MUCH easier vampire “birth.”

girlfriday: Yeah, but then they have to grow up in a society where there is no k-pop, no k-drama, and therefore NO JOY.

javabeans: Thankfully they’re cronies of the prince, who gets all that stuff smuggled in anyway. And really, they’re just a hop, skip, and a wormhole away from k-poplandia anyway.

girlfriday: But that was supposed to be a daytrip, and then they got banished for it.

javabeans: I will give you that it’s probably worse for idol boys to have spent the first 200 years of their lives thinking they were hideous, while Tae-yeon just gets to be his hot self his whole life.

girlfriday: True. Once a hottie, always a hottie. It’s much more painful for vampire princey, who goes from hottie to nottie. It’s coming down to Earth, both ways.

javabeans: Badum-ching! That’s true. But really, we’re not talking about the prince, are we? Not when we have Nerd, Dork, and Bloodthirsty around? And speaking of which, with vampidols, you get your pick of four! Or, yunno, all four, if that’s how you roll.

girlfriday: Of course that’s how I roll. Why you even asking? Who would you pick?

javabeans: I’m partial to the Nerd, but I’m thinking in real life he’d be a pain to be around, always correcting you and being so smug about it. Bloodthirsty has that whole hot intensity thing, but I wouldn’t want to fear for my life all the time. So Dork it is.

girlfriday: If I had to choose, I’d go with Dork. He fell in love with a bunny, not knowing there was a girl inside!

javabeans: Then again, I suppose Prosecutor sort of is equal parts Nerd, Dork, and Bloodthirsty anyway…

girlfriday: All rolled into one hot package?

javabeans: Yes, minus the childish imperious prince. But maybe princey and Soon-bum cancel each other out?

girlfriday: Ha. Every vampire’s gotta have a whiny sidekick. Though Soon-bum beats Princey, in that he comes to the rescue when he’s needed, whereas Princey gets himself into trouble and needs rescuing all the time.

javabeans: Skills-wise, Prosecutor has all the kickass fighting talents… but hey, the idol boys can fly and stand upside-down. And they live in a piano! So, they have body-morphing and -shrinking abilities.

girlfriday: I suppose morphing could be handy, but bachelor pad beats piano, any day of the week.

javabeans: But Prosecutor’s vampiness gives him migraines. The idols are too evolved for that.

girlfriday: But he can see visions when he drinks dead people’s blood.

javabeans: But all of his crime-solving could have been done without his psychic visions! (Seriously, dude, just spare yourself the headaches.)

girlfriday: Okay, true. That was a useless plot device. But the pretty blue eyes! And Prosecutor definitely wins in the guyliner category. He fights baddies all day, and not a smudge!

javabeans: Sure, Prosecutor can score the long-lasting-eye-makeup commercials, but he has to fight all day! It’s a tough gig. And as if that’s not enough, then he’s gotta be all day-job-ready too. That’s TWO full time, life-threatening jobs. I’d rather be the lazy vampire, thanks. ‘Cause let’s face it, one of those things is a fixed condition.

girlfriday: Lazy or vampire?

javabeans: Well, I meant lazy in that that would be the case no matter what my human/alien/paranormal status. But I guess vampire is a fixed condition too. Just maybe less problematic than the laziness.

girlfriday: It is amazing how UN-problematic the condition is in most dramas. There’s hardly a downside. There’s no bumpy forehead, no need for a daylight ring, no soul-less alter ego waiting to be freed.

javabeans: Right? So in that sense it’s kind of like Prosecutor is being all broody for no reason. He’s got it good, yo!

girlfriday: Compared to his tv vampire predecessors, yeah, he’s got it made. But he does have the bloodthirsty-for-the-girl problem. Some things you can never shake.

javabeans: Ha, for some reason that makes me think of the Seinfeld episode where George tries to sneak-eat during sex. It’s his flawed “Best of Both Worlds!” dream scenario. Somehow I think that works less well with blood.

girlfriday: Hahaha. You mean cheeseburger vs. artery?

javabeans: Well, I was thinking he could sneak a hospital blood bag in there to manage that bloodlust craving, but then we’d be leaping from the slick, stylish Vampire Prosecutor straight into something out of National Lampoon. Much less sexy, never as funny as it wants to be, and a little repulsive.

girlfriday: Well now even if we DO get a sex scene, I’m just going to be picturing that. Thanks.

javabeans: You’re welcome. I’ll give it to Prosecutor for having the more promising future girlfriend, since she’s a gutsy and fearless professional woman versus the Girls Girls bunch, who tend to be flighty. But does Potential Future Girlfriend measure up against Actual Girlfriends, However Silly?

girlfriday: Yes, because he’s the one keeping kickass Potential Girlfriend at arm’s length for her own good, because he’s a Noble Idiot Vampire.

javabeans: I think I’d rather be Selfish Vampire than Noble Idiot Vampire. One’s better for admiring from afar for his principles and etc, the other one’s better to be.

girlfriday: You’d think that bloodlust (or hell, just plain ol’ lust) would win out over noble idiocy in an in-touch-with-his-dark-side creature of the night.

javabeans: Boss-wise, Prosecutor has got the rawer deal. With the whole trying-to-beat-him-to-death thing, and terrorizing-society-at-large-with-his-rationalized-god-complex thing. The idols have to deal with a cheapskate, a control freak, and a goofball, but those are all still on the annoyance scale.

girlfriday: True, but even god complex guy doesn’t shut off the electricity or limit his cell phone data usage, which is just no way to live.

javabeans: They win cell phones for themselves, though, using their super-smarts, so that works out in the end. Being self-sufficient can help them jump that hurdle, but Prosecutor’s just gotta deal with Bad Guy Who’s Not A Bad Guy Whom He Can Neither Kill Nor Not Kill. Heavy stuff, dude.

girlfriday: But as far as vampiric status being useful, it’s a lot handier for a prosecutor who faces life and death to put away baddies, than for idol trainees. What do they gain? Faster dance reflexes?

javabeans: I bet if you dropped vampidols in into Prosecutor’s world, they’d be all right with their super-hearing, -smarts, and -reflexes. But you drop Prosecutor into idol-land? And… actually, now I really wanna see that.

girlfriday: Tae-yeon would kill innocent people before becoming a vampidol. Though a case where he has to go undercover as one would make my day.

javabeans: Singing and dancing and wearing glitter?

girlfriday: Don’t you think he could be in Shinhwa? I always thought he was a dead ringer for Andy.

javabeans: Yeon Jung-hoon? No way! (To the Andy.) I totally want to see him in Shinhwa though. Or better yet, G.O.D.

girlfriday: It’s just so wrong… it’s right.

javabeans: Basically we need him to star in our original production, “A-Dol,” aka Ajusshi-Idol.

girlfriday: Okay, fantasy casting. Six members of A-dol. Go.

javabeans: Yoon Kye-sang, naturally.

girlfriday: Naturally.

javabeans: Jang Hyuk, because that would be hilarious. And Kim Kang-woo, because it’s so freakin’ weird that he had that history and is such a stiff, serious actor now.

girlfriday: Kim Kang-woo can hold up the non-singing, shirtless guy role in the group.

javabeans: I think they should all hold up the shirtless guy role. Although Cha Tae-hyun could be the center of attention with his comic one-liners.

girlfriday: He would be a good frontman. That leaves dancing guy, and one really good singer.

javabeans: Is Eric too obvious a choice?

girlfriday: I was totally gonna ask YOU that!

javabeans: Then Eric is our dancer. Now, we just need a singer for our singing group. Alex?

girlfriday: Pffft. You mean our fantasy a-dol group has a ballad singer standing in the center, not moving while the others dance around him?

javabeans: That’s what makes it so funny! He can be their figurative Maypole.

girlfriday: Okay, so we’ve got Alex the Singing Maypole, Cha Tae-hyun the Leader, Yoon Kye-sang the Eye Candy Cutie Pie, Kim Kang-woo the Shirtless Guy, Eric the Dancing Machine, and Jang Hyuk…. the… What the hell is he?

javabeans: The Shirtless Eye Candy Dancing Rapping Comic Leader.

girlfriday: No! He’s the Wannabe Serious Actor Guy!

javabeans: He can be all those things.

girlfriday: And then! (Just to bring it back on-topic) when they get flack for being too old, they can turn into vampires to stay young forever! Only they’re already ajusshis.

javabeans: Aw, talk about close but no cigar. On the idol upside, at least we got practically eighty episodes to enjoy their adorkable hotness. Prosecutor only got twelve! My math says idols win.

girlfriday: But Prosecutor gets a Season 2!

javabeans: While Vampire Idol got cut. That calls for *sadface* *happyface.*

girlfriday: *Fangface.*

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And this is one of the reasons why I LOVE this website....

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I second that...

First was their adorbs-but-very-sorely-missed "News Bites"...

...then now their latest addition to the crazy: "Thing vs. Thing".

I really think they should extend the first one (time-travelling) since we've got "Dr. Jin" (who I really sense will be around the time of the early 19th-cen. since Lee Beom-soo was to play Yi Ha-eung, meaning he's Heungseon Daewongun, meaning we're going to Gojong-Empress Myeongseong territory...and Jejungwon, if we can smuggle that, only, no one really gave notice to my comment in the Dr. Jin entry... *weepyface*) and "Faith"...tho I kinda forgot if "Faith" would also concentrate with time-travel...

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lol Rovi wow you really know your history! Anws... even though Dr Jin and Faith will be a few months apart in air time, I am sure our lovely ladies over here can still do another Thing vs thing on that heheheh I am looking forward to it already! =D

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Note to Self: Remember to not have any sort of liquids in mouth while reading "Thing vs. Thing" entries. BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I'd be camping out for days if "Ajusshi Idol" ever decided to tour and made a stop in my town. :P

Well done, gals!! ::clapclapclap::

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seiously! I want to see A-dol happening right NOW!!!

They could take on any idol group in the industry XD

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I agree! All they need to do is have Jang Hyuk glare at the idol group (all Chuno-style) and the hapless victims would wilt into nothing.

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Their back-up band could consist of Choi Min-soo on guitar, Yu Hui-yeol on piano, Jang Dong-gun on bass, Lee Jong-hyuk on drums (but he'd be so hot, he'd explode like a Spinal Tap drummer), and making a special appearance on tambourine (like Tracy on the 'Partridge Family'), Cha Seung-won!!! :D

But I digress. Vampires. Yup, vampires are smexy in any shape or form. RAWR!

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Lol - Choi Min-soo is the first one who came to my mind, too. How awsomesauce would he be?!?!
:)

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Is it weird that I want Ji Hyun Woo as a lead guitarist, even though he's not even 30 yet (and therefore not exactly an "ahjussi"-ahjussi)? D;

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Heh. It was more like an inside laugh for me, so no worries on my part about spitting out any fluids. If I did laugh it just comes out as a small smile. I think it might be too early for me to be laughing at things. Heh. XD

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*giggles*

I'm sad that Kim Jong-kook doesn't make the cut for A-Dol, though. He could totally be the shirtless one. Mmm, shirtless KJK...

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I was wishing for KJK to be with Jang Concubine and Cha Concubine lol

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Yes Yes YES on the Concubine front. And it works out that they're besties with Jang Hyuk so we'll have twice the Jang Concubines. Hahaha. Maybe Jang Hyuk can be Hyuk Concubine.

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isn't he that huge guy with the Daesung face on Running Man? YUM.

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YEAH! Kim Jong Kook should be here too! KJK-CTH-Jang Hyuk combo is epic. Later fans would fight on which pairing is better, KookHyun, HyukHyun, or KookHyuk. xD

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OMG, I died laughing all through the casting of A-dol!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

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Did Dork really fall for a rabbit? LOL
Which episode? I've got to see that!

I love these "Thing vs Thing" posts!

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Well he found out after a long time that the raabbit was a girl and i can say he was the only who had a happy ending even if the networked killed the sitcom...

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"figurative Maypole" Excellent! Hehe. Inspired addition to DB archive.

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It's such a pity that vampire idol got cut!! It was such a hilarious sitcom the ending was so random they should've atleast let them have a more closure ending!

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Interesting, interesting! Hehe(:
By the way, did you guys know that the guy who acted as the Prince in Vampire Idol(Lee Jung) sang the ending song of Vampire Prosecutor? Haha :D I love that song(Crazy For Love)!!! <3 And I love our smouldering Vampy Prosecutor too. Can't wait for season 2!!!!!!

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I'm sorry everyone... The only vampire for me is Prosecutor vampy! I can't keep my eyes off of him. Keep the idols for yourself ladies. :)

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You should do Idol dramas next! So most likely it'll be You're Beautiful vs K-POP: The Ultimate Audition. Unless you want to do the clash of the Hong Sisters' works, so it'll be YB vs Best Love. So excited for it! Love this section of yours. ^^

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They can also do all three of them together.. it'll be like a gladiator match to the death- whose K-Poplandia was best *giggle*

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Did I ever tell you girls how much I love you? Thank you JB and GF for the glorious post to wake up to!!! You guys picked out great looking VP screenshots :DDD I am so psyched for VP2!!!!

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I can't wait new season ;)

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Thank you. Thank you.

I was killing myself laughing at the Idol band. Yoon Kye Sang and Eric, the dancing machine. All dancing around Alex.
Oh man I am dying here :-)

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I always did want both of them collaborating together... who knew a-dol would be just the thing?

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"Yeah, but then they have to grow up in a society where there is no k-pop, no k-drama, and therefore NO JOY".

Love this!

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Lol. Their fangfaces look awesome!

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Omo you made my day ;)

'Tae-yeon would kill innocent people before becoming a vampidol. Though a case where he has to go undercover as one would make my day'...hahhaee... :)
TRUE STORY

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Vampire idols all the way! Who wouldn't want to be a young idol forever? Although the ending of that sitcom pissed me off so much I swore I'd never look at it again. The white christmas guys were my reason for sticking with it so long.

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Heh, Amen... All I had wanted was for Hyuk Soo to be happy with his chicken... and even that didn't happen. After that I felt pretty sure I would never see the rest of the babies happy either *deep sigh*

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What number is the last episode? I was following Vamp Idol, but then one day there weren't any new episodes. That couldn't have been the ending, could it??

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Even though I have not watched both the shows and am pretty sure I missed a few jokes, I still LOLd at your post!!!

You girls rock on your own pretty well but together???? You girls are unbeatable!! <3

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like it. NO, LOVE IT!!

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Hah hah, Dramabeans. One point for me because I knew better than to read this while having my morning coffee. So, I switched to morning water, which is easier to clean up . . . or not to clean up at all. hee, hee.

As always, you're totally hilarious, witty and brilliant with your topics, conversations and writing.

Honestly, l like VampPros for my adult side and the VampDols for my child side. So, I'll take them all.

I was really bummed when they cancelled VampDols because that was my 'cute of the day'. I was looking forward to the romance of Dork and Bloodthirsty. I was hoping that you would write a final review and tell us how they ended the show.

Thank you for a wonderful wake up read.

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Let me rephrase: I was looking forward to the romances of Dork and Bloodthirsty with their respective female humans, i.e. girl manager and bunny.

On the other hand, I wouldn't be opposed to the meaning of my original sentence either. hee, hee

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Can I request Chaebol vs. Chaebol next or sometime??? It'll be interesting to see who will get picked. :D And funny.

Thanks for another good read!!! (:

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I didn't watch Prosecutor and only read recaps of Vamp idol, but boy do I love reading you two bantering on about them. Post like these are the reason I love this site!
haha, A-dol! *dies laughing* i dunno about anywhere else, but adol is a popular childrens paracetamol syrup here in Saudi Arabia. Made the Ahjusshi idol idea all the more attractive.

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Aw, this post was great. Honestly, I really don't like vampire stories. I've never really met anyone who felt the same way, but what on earth is the fascination with them? That they kill humans to suck their blood (has no one ever tasted blood? It's really not tasty at all! XD)? Buffy was the exception for me, but otherwise I honestly never get into, or even watch, vampire shows. The whole concept seems bizarre to me @_@~

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Well, I guess the original vampire tales are the most interesting. And the scary thing about them is that they find blood tasty lol, it's the only thing they can have anyway. Everything else turns to dust in their mouths supposedly, so not much to choose from XD

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Oh how i love this website! 'kpoplandia', 'fangface', and 'ajushi idol' and the rest of the article had me laughing out loud. Now i totally want to watch some more vampire idol...

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Aaaaw. Vampire Idol got cut? Damn you MBN! Oh well, I sure hope to see Lee Jung on another show soon. And his Vampire cast too. XD

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Jang Hyuk is an excellent choice. I finally saw a few of his old "music videos" recently. It was an experience.

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Hahaha. I remember when I first saw his MVs through Star Golden Bell and this was me "Whaaaa?" Hahaha. i had to look it up and it blew my mind away. His lives with Kim Suro and the other dude is pretty hysterical too.

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i think i would go with vimpire prosecutor. i love his fangs more than the idol vampires'. and for one think he's good looking

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LOL their vamp faces are hilarious. Looking forward to another Thing vs. Thing!

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You guys rock! And, I totally pick the Prosecutor. Season 2 here we come!

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awww i miss Vampire Idol ^^
i love Toki/Yoo-bi and Woo bin couple! they are so cute!
i hope they didn't cut it! :(

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LOVING the fantasy casting. And lets not forget that GOD had Kim Tae Woo and Shinhwa had Hyesung, neither of whom are known for their dancing technique. In fact Alex might beat them.

Thing vs thing makes me happy. And so does any mention of Shinhwa....and GOD. :)

You guys are hilarious!!

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This thing vs thing is fun! I haven't watched both shows but Vampire Prosecutor is definitely on my watch list reading all the great reviews about it.

Can we possibly have 'Kings' next? *wink wink* *"LeeJaeHaVSLeeHwon* ^^
Just because I've watched both dramas and am currently addicted to one of them (if that's not already obvious hahaa)

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Thing vs. Thing ...For the Win !!! (absolutely Love these posts...please keep doing this) ~(っˆーˆ)っ❤

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a-dol, a-dol, a-dol. it just sounds hilarious. heh.

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Looooove this site!! Please ooooh please, do a Gender -Bender Thing vs Thins. Will be waiting... pretty please =)

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I would want to be a vampire prosecutor, hands down. You get the pretty girls as an vampire idol but my goodness I'd be so freaking cool as a prosecutor, swirling AB negative blood in my wine glass, lol. Not to mention kicking the blankity blank out of bad guys. Totally cool right?

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Can't wait for things vs things when Big comes out! Big vs I love Italy. I love Italy two episodes not bad. This one is actually the remake of Tom Hanks's Big. Tho I thought they pulled out the 14 yr old actor/character too soon. Nice to have a clear mental image of the original character when the older version does something too stupid.

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Why is it, when anyone 'vamps up' their eyes change colour to blue? Are blue eyes evil then? I'm a little bit put out as I thought Koreans liked blue eyes and didn't really consider myself to be a minion of the night. So as someone who has blue eyes, are Koreans going to expect me to spout fangs as well when I visit there? I'll see what I can do, but it might be a tad difficult.

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Is the second picture of Jang Geung Suk?
Where is it from?

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