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Because This Life Is Our First: Episode 11

Today our couples learn that it’s impossible to ever know the exact distance between you and someone else’s heart. Sometimes it feels like only inches, but is actually long, winding miles that seem to go in circles. Other times the distance seems to be perfectly measured lengths, with mutually agreed upon terms that determine when, where, and how many steps forward each person takes. And other times, the distance is the realization that every step you’ve taken is toward each other.

 
Episode 11: “Because it’s the first time for today’s ocean”

Se-hee wakes in the morning, recalling Ji-ho’s request that he go to her family’s house and participate in their annual kimchi-making. He tried protesting that Namhae was too far, but Ji-ho sharply replied that that wasn’t her problem.

He walks out to kitchen and sees her there, but her mood is frosty. She tells him that she’s leaving their marriage contract at the cafe since his mother went through their things the last time she was there, and Ji-ho doesn’t want to risk being discovered.

He tries to assure her that his mother won’t barge in unannounced anymore, but ignores that and advises him to hide his copy of the contract at his office, which he obediently agrees to do.

She maintains her cold attitude until she’s out the door, then praises herself for doing a good job maintaining her poker face.

Inside, Se-hee talks to Cat, catching the hint that Ji-ho is upset with him. He does as he’s told and dutifully gets his copy of their marriage contract for safe storage.

At work, there’s a crisis afoot as the entire company discusses a new rival app on the market called “Marriage, Not Dating,” which, as the name suggests, focuses on matching people based on their marriage potential, and without the emphasis on just dating.

During the meeting (after Se-hee unhelpfully praises the rival app’s design layout), Won-seok suggests they change their app’s dating concept and then criticizes the name of their app, “Dating, Not Marriage.” When everyone looks toward Se-hee after being asked who named the app, Won-seok points out the irony that Se-hee is actually the only one who is married, and Se-hee fires eye-daggers at Won-seok from behind his tablet.

At the cafe, Ji-ho recalls Se-hee’s words about her not being as great of a defender as he had thought, and how he had given her money to pay for her labor. She scoffs at his arrogance and asks if he thinks he’s Won Bin or something (a la Won Bin’s famous line from Autumn Fairy Tale).

Meanwhile, Bok-nam nosily reviews Ji-ho’s marriage contract and deems the terms acceptable and even teasingly contemplates entering into his own contractual marriage to reap its benefits. He calls the most appealing aspect the benefit of having someone there when he returns home instead of being lonely.

Ji-ho begins complaining about the difficult life of a daughter-in-law and how husbands don’t take their wife’s side during family matters.
Bok-nam watches Ji-ho with an incredulous expression and tells her that she sounds just like the ajumma living next door to him. He tells Ji-ho that she used to be so sweet when they first met, and decides it’s better not to get married after all.

Sang-gu announces Se-hee’s brazen request for a day off during their time of crisis, but Se-hee explains that he needs to go to Namhae to make kimchi with his in-laws, shocking the room. He adds that he hasn’t taken a personal day off the entire year, and Sang-gu marvels at the power of marriage.

Won-seok gets called out of work by his future mother-in-law, who heard he proposed. She tells Won-seok that Ho-rang will make a good housewife, but is disappointed to hear that Won-seok has yet to announce his engagement to his parents or set a date for their wedding.

Unaware that he and Ho-rang live together (thinking Ho-rang lives with Su-ji), she encourages Won-seok not to let their engagement drag on. Won-seok remains polite, but his eyes grow troubled.

Su-ji goes out to lunch with her colleagues, but is forced to wear her coat since she can’t find her bra. Manager Park casts a sneaky glance toward her, then actually throws food at her jacket to force her to take off her coat.

The instant it’s off, her workers notice that she doesn’t have a bra on. After lunch, Su-ji takes a smoke break outside and overhears Park collecting money from the male colleagues, apparently having bet that Su-ji doesn’t wear a bra. BRO, it ain’t any of your business. STOP BEING A CREEP.

They disgustingly speculate on Su-ji’s bra size, and once Su-ji decides that she’s heard enough she joins the group, asks for a light for her cigarette, and blows out a stream of smoke right at Park’s face.

She asks Park if he won a lot of money, then sizes Park up to assess that his breast size looks to be about the same as hers. She offers to lend him her bra before popping her cigarette into his cup of coffee.

In the elevator, Sang-gu eyes Se-hee strangely, which makes Se-hee uncomfortable. He can’t comprehend how words like “kimchi” and “vacation” entered Se-hee’s closed-off brain. Se-hee explains matter-of-factly that Ji-ho helped out with his family’s memorial rites, and he’s returning the favor.

This makes sense to Sang-gu, since he knows that it’s common for memorial rites duties to sow discord between couples. Se-hee agrees with the logic and offers his own two cents on the matter regarding the “social illness created by Korean parents, who exploit their children’s partners by calling them family.”

Se-hee adds that a rational person would never pick a system such a marriage that lends itself to so many irrational outcomes, which leads Sang-gu to ask why someone like Se-hee would get married. Se-hee looks away guiltily, realizing his slip-up.

Sang-gu becomes dogged and throws out possible reasons for why Se-hee would agree to get married such as Ji-ho being a cat lover, and paying rent. Gulp.

With Sang-gu getting dangerously close to uncovering Se-hee and Ji-ho’s contractual marriage, he tries to distract Sang-gu by reiterating that Ji-ho is “Preeeeetty.” But the way he says it is so weird and almost deranged, and I can’t stop laughing.

Sang-gu doesn’t seem to be buying it, so Se-hee tries again, but this time takes Sang-gu through an extended logical explanation of why a man would want to marry a pretty woman. Sang-gu is convinced at last.

Su-ji texts right then, and suddenly Sang-gu is hurrying toward the door to meet her. He bumps into Se-hee and a few of their folders fall to the ground in a pile. He hastily grabs a few folders without checking then sprints out. Oh no, he has the contract, doesn’t he?

Sang-gu gets into Su-ji’s car and immediately she attacks him with kisses. He tries to convince her to get dinner first but she complains that she’s feeling too frustrated, and he guesses that something happened at work.

She tries to deny it, but he urges her to tell him the truth. She eventually does, and the disclosure sets him off. She tells him that she already took care of things, but he continues to rage about her co-workers’ behavior, then puts his foot in his mouth and asks, “What kind of women don’t wear bras at work?” She tells him plainly that she’s one of those women.

Ji-ho joins Se-hee on their commute home, but sits next to him in icy silence. Hilariously, there’s a married woman in the back of the bus talking angrily on the phone with her husband, speaking uncannily in time with Se-hee’s questions to Ji-ho. When Se-hee asks Ji-ho if she’s eaten dinner, the woman snarks, “Of course I haven’t yet, at this hour.” Se-hee suggests to Ji-ho that they eat out, and the woman barks, “Eat out? Just eat what’s in the fridge!”

The longer this goes on, the more it sounds like the woman is speaking up for Ji-ho, and it makes Ji-ho remember Bok-nam’s comment that she sounds like his neighbor.

At home, the two prepare their separate dinners, and Ji-ho decides to eat on the coffee table instead of with Se-hee at the table. He watches her for a beat, then announces that he’s taken the day off to help with kimchi-making.

Ji-ho looks pleased, then remembers to tell him that she can’t go since she has work. Se-hee already knows, but is prepared to go alone because Ji-ho went alone to his parents’ house, and plans to work the same number of hours as she had.

She asks about the contract, and Se-hee tells her that he keeps it in his briefcase since Sang-gu will occasionally go through his documents. Ji-ho agrees that it will be troublesome if Sang-gu were to discover their secret, and Se-hee adds that if Sang-gu found out, Su-ji would know too.

Ji-ho’s eyes widen in shock to hear of Su-ji and Sang-gu’s relationship, having been unaware. Se-hee agrees that it’s surprising, noting how strange it is that Su-ji and Sang-gu don’t really match, but are together anyway. Internally, Ji-ho remarks that they are married after all.

In their hotel room, Sang-gu is having a mental breakdown over Su-ji’s braless lifestyle. He asks if she understands his feelings of worry and concern, and she replies that it feels like he’s only rationalizing himself, and romanticizing his feelings of possessiveness. Hear, hear.

She continues that his behavior is a breach of contract since it intrudes on her privacy, so he takes out the contract, but it doesn’t look like the one Su-ji drafted…

Meanwhile, Se-hee is likewise reviewing Su-ji and Sang-gu’s dating contract. He smirks when he sees Sang-gu and Su-ji’s signatures, then shows it to Ji-ho.

He seems very smug when he tells her that he had said they didn’t really match. Ji-ho finds the contract ridiculous, but then remembers that they shouldn’t be casting judgment.

She asks how he obtained the document, and he explains that it got into his files when he bumped into Sang-gu. As a joke, she says disbelieving that there is no way their contracts got mixed-up or anything… right?

But of course there is, and so they panic. Alas, it’s already too late because Su-ji now knows everything. Su-ji mentally flashes through all of Ji-ho’s strange behavior and slips of the tongue, understanding now what they meant.

Ji-ho calls Su-ji out right away to give her some food from Mom, and as they make small talk, Su-ji slips in mention of the contract. She finds the contract absurd, asking sarcastically if she can be Se-hee’s next wife-tenant after two years since the rent is so cheap. She calls Ji-ho crazy, which is exactly what Sang-gu is doing to Se-hee elsewhere.

Notably, Sang-gu is more amazed that Se-hee would even suggest marriage as a potential solution just to pay off his mortgage. Se-hee notes Sang-gu’s wording, as though mortgages and money are frivolous things, and says that having a home and money are extremely important. But mainly, through their contract he was able to help someone who really needed a place to stay, which happened to also benefit him.

Sang-gu watches Se-hee thoughtfully then asks if Ji-ho reminded Se-hee of “her.” Se-hee blinks, a bit stunned, but doesn’t answer, and Sang-gu doesn’t say anymore.

Ji-ho apologizes to Su-ji for not telling her about her contractual marriage, and Su-ji is understanding, and even a bit worried that Ji-ho is having a hard time. Ji-ho confirms that she’s doing okay, and adds that she isn’t the type to regret her decisions, but Su-ji isn’t so convinced since she knows that Ji-ho likes Se-hee.

Su-ji asks pointedly if Se-hee likes her back, and Ji-ho admits that he doesn’t, nor does he even know about her feelings for him.

Ji-ho narrates, “There must be a way to reach someone’s heart. If there is a way, there must be a place where it starts.”

On her rooftop, Ho-rang looks at her and Won-seok’s shared bank account. They’d agreed at the outset to both deposit small monthly amounts, with grand dreams of buying a home together. But while Ho-rang had faithfully made her monthly deposits, we see that Won-seok’s deposits became smaller and smaller until eventually they stopped.

Won-seok opens the gift from Ho-rang’s mother and sees that it’s a necktie. Ji-ho narrates on, “If there’s a way to reach someone’s heart, then there must be somewhere we can meet at the end.”

Won-seok returns home and finds Ho-rang in bed. He whispers into her ear, and she turns toward him sleepily. He suggests a date on the weekend, and she agrees to it half-asleep. He watches her face for a long beat, then she turns away and slowly open her eyes, casting a serious look. Beside her, Won-seok stares up at the ceiling deep in thought.

At home, Ji-ho finds a note from Se-hee telling her he explained things to Sang-gu. Her narration continues, “At the place where our hearts meet, can another path begin? But what I’m afraid of most is not that we have different paths, or that we’ll never meet on the way. It’s that there’s no path to your heart. That there might not be any way to reach your heart at all. That’s what I’m most afraid of.”

But still, she smiles to read a second note, which tells her he’ll be going to Namhae tomorrow. She thinks, “But for now, I can’t do anything about it. I don’t know the road to his heart, but he knows the road to make kimchi. That’s him. I came to like him. For now, that is enough.”

The next day, Se-hee makes his way to Ji-ho’s parents’ home. He has a brief movie moment enjoying the sea breeze from the bus window until a grumpy passenger behind him orders him to close the window. Haha.

He has trouble getting accurate direction from his GPS in the rural area, but he eventually arrives. Mom hurries over to meet him—surprised to see him there (Ji-ho had told her that “someone” was coming, but didn’t name them), while the gaggle of ajummas compliment Se-hee’s good looks.

Dad comes out and ushers Se-hee in to rest and let the women finish making the kimchi, but Se-hee is adamant about working. Everyone is unsure what to make of his insistence, so Se-hee explains that Ji-ho helped with his family’s memorial rites.

Dad insists that helping with memorial rites is nothing special and urges Se-hee to rest. But Mom seems to understand what that’s about and gets Se-hee set up to help with the kimchi-making, which Se-hee is eager to do.

He reports an update to Ji-ho about his arrival, which Ji-ho receives while working. Su-ji stops by for coffee, and so Ji-ho tells her about Se-hee and his kimchi journey. Su-ji is amazed, but Ji-ho doubts that her family will actually make Se-hee lift a finger, and figures that he’ll just eat kimchi and come back.

She couldn’t be more wrong, as Se-hee gets decked out in ajumma work clothing as sets his timer for six hours. The ajummas are happy to make him run around doing all sort of things for them, but also cackle at/mock his newbie form. This is amazing. He’s so fabulously weird. Mom defends Se-hee after her friends give him too hard of a time, which brings a tiny smile to his face. Hehehe!

Ji-ho receives photo updates from her brother, and is alarmed to see Se-hee actually working (and even grows indignant to see him being harassed by the ajummas). Bok-nam proves to be Cupid in disguise and tells Ji-ho to go be with her husband if she’s worried by letting her swap shifts.

It looks like the hours of hard kimchi labor are finally getting to Se-hee, but unfortunately for him, it’s only stage one. LOL, all these sounds are killing me. Give the sound person a raise already!

Ji-ho feeds Cat before she heads up, and finds Cat hiding in Se-hee’s closet. She spots the book of poems Se-hee was looking at last week, and asks Cat if she can borrow it, since she’s wanted to read it.

She brings the book with her on the bus, and finds a note written inside to Se-hee, “my love and my everything,” from “your everything.”

Mom tries to let Se-hee off the hook, but Se-hee is intent on persevering through the six hours. However, when Ji-ho appears at the gate his jaw literally drops with a smile and he springs to his feet. That smile!

Outside her office, Sang-gu hands Su-ji a big bag filled with bras. He tells her that he picked out the most comfortable bras that he could find, and asks her to find one that she likes, and if she can’t find one, then he’ll keep looking. He apologizes for pressuring her about his preferences, and promises to fix his tendency, but asks that she think of him a little too.

He admits that it’s hard for him thinking about all the men looking at her and thinking weird stuff, and she apologizes for going overboard.

She tells him to wait for her so they can go get dinner together, which makes him light up adorably. She begins walking back, but runs back to give him a kiss on the cheek, which of course has him melting.

Se-hee rests in Ji-ho’s childhood room, and she asks how he’s feeling. He confesses to having some aches and pains, but assures her that he’ll be all right. She decides to buy him some pain relievers, but before she leaves he asks about her job today. She tells him not to worry about it, so he asks if she came because she was worried about him. She pauses for a beat then confirms it, and so he admits that he was really happy to see her arrive, and

She goes to the pharmacy, but on her way back she stops by the beach and takes out the book she borrowed. She flips to a poem:

The fact that someone comes to you
is actually a tremendous thing.
Because he
and his past
and the present
and
also his future come with him.
Because his life comes with him.
It’s easily broken
and therefore could have broken
the heart that comes.

Under that poem, there’s a handwritten Post-It note that reads: “Go back and live as though nothing happened. But don’t ever love someone. You don’t have the right to love.”

She wonders about the paths to Se-hee’s heart, and thinks, “The moment I knew what that path was, the reason my heart hurt so much was not because of jealousy or frustration. It was because twelve years ago on the same day, I had dreamed of love, and you ended your love, and that was just a bit sad.”

Back in her room, Se-hee looks over all of Ji-ho’s things, including her photos on the wall. He finds her diary, with an entry from twelve years ago where she had written down her friend’s dreams, and wrote for herself: “Love?”

After kimchi-making winds down, Se-hee sits with Dad and the husbands to eat and drink, and Dad praises Se-hee for coming to help. One of the husbands makes a comment about Se-hee’s actions not being manly, so Mom replies hat Se-hee is here because he adores Ji-ho.

Suddenly, the man orders Se-hee to confirm Mom’s claim and begins forcing Se-hee to drink nonstop. Se-hee struggles to keep up, but thankfully Ji-seok calls him over to save him from the torture.

At dinner, Sang-gu comments on how it’s the first time they’ve eaten together, instead of just drinking like they usually do. Su-ji doesn’t really see the importance, but Sang-gu claims that eating together is the best way for people to get closer.

Su-ji smiles and agrees, commenting that that is after all how Ji-ho fell. She realizes her slip, but also has said too much and explains that Ji-ho likes Se-hee. She asks him not to say anything to Se-hee, and calls Ji-ho’s love one-sided.

Sang-gu’s face is unreadable as he asks if she really thinks that Se-hee doesn’t know that Ji-ho likes him. What!? OMG!

Su-ji questions Sang-gu about that, but when she asks how Se-hee feels about Ji-ho, Sang-gu changes the topic. Su-ji slams her hand on the table in frustration, worried about Ji-ho since she lacks experience in love. Sang-gu finally says that Se-hee must scared because he knows what love feels like.

In Namhae, Se-hee finds Ji-ho on the beach and calls out to her. As she looks up, he runs over to join her, taking a seat next to her.

They sit down on the peer as the sunset, and Ji-ho sees that he’s tipsy from all the drinking. She wonders in exasperation why he just accepted the drinks when he’s usually good at refusing.

He remarks that this must be how she felt when he said that she was usually a good defender. He calls it a sad feeling, but then comments on how nice the sea looks. She says that it’s the first time she’s seeing the ocean with someone who isn’t a friend or part of her family; it’s her first time seeing the ocean with a man.

He remarks that she hasn’t done many things before, and she replies that she was really busy during her twenties, so she doesn’t know about many things.

Se-hee tells her about a poem he liked when he was in his twenties, and starts to recite the poem she’d read from his book. He admits that he didn’t really know what it meant at the time, but when he understood its meaning, he couldn’t like it anymore. He adds, “There are a lot of things you can never do again when you actually know about them. So I’m envious of you. Not knowing is a good thing.”

Ji-ho replies that it’s the same for Se-hee because although he’s seen the ocean before, the one he’s looking at now is for the first time. Even though someone has done something before and knows it well, every moment with another person is the first time… like their marriage, and their first kiss.

She says that the way things transpire in life isn’t anyone’s fault; it’s just the way that things happened. Therefore, she tells Se-hee not to worry too much, since “It’s not like you know all about today just because you lived yesterday.” Deep.

Se-hee looks at Ji-ho as if her words are breaking down a wall inside of him, and he slowly smiles as he recalls their memories, thinking of the lines from the poem about a person’s heart coming to another.

He says that he now understands why people go to the beach when they feel suffocated, because, “You can meet your heart here.” He continues that there is something he’s wanted to correct. He tells her that the kiss she initiated that the bus stop was a “peck,” and not a real kiss. Omg, omg, omg, omg.

She’s a bit annoyed when he starts to nitpick her technique, and thinks he’s doing one of his condescending lectures again. She cops to being bad at kissing, and so he says, “This is how you kiss.” He then leans in and kisses her.

He pulls away after a moment to ask if she understands what a kiss is now, or where they need to do it again. She asks for more, and this time they embrace as they kiss. Ji-ho narrates, “Easily broken, the heart that might have been broken… that heart came to me.”

 
COMMENTS

That kiss was so perfect. Honestly, I totally forgot about their spontaneous kiss at the bus stop until now, but I may have blocked it out because it was really embarrassing, and overshadowed by everything else about Se-hee and Ji-ho’s amazing relationship. I keep getting wrapped up in these thoughts that we need to move at these tiny caterpillar steps in the romance department with Se-hee because we don’t want to scare him off, but in this episode he took those crucial steps toward Ji-ho, and crossed the boundary to her, blowing away everything I hoped he would do and so much more. I really was not expecting that to happen. Nor would I ever had expected their kiss to feel so right, and natural, and a culmination of all these perfect little moments. This romance operates in the mundane, but the big moments are bold, brave, and overflowing with warmth and tenderness.

In every episode (or pair of episodes) I keep thinking that I’ll adapt to the show’s ability to surprise me by revealing sides of these characters that I overlooked or underestimated, and yet again and again the show pulls it off in these remarkably organic ways. I never thought Se-hee would be so far along emotionally in his feelings for Ji-ho, and I was shocked when Sang-gu asked Su-ji if she really thought that Se-hee knew nothing about Ji-ho’s feelings for him. I would really, really love to see certain scenes from only Se-hee’s perspective, but if I went back and watched the episodes again I probably would realize that everything was already there for me to see, just like with Se-hee’s exchange with Mom at the wedding.

I love how determined Se-hee was to participate in the kimjang and fulfill his end of the bargain and make up with Ji-ho. But nothing tops Se-hee’s pure excitement to see Ji-ho show up unexpectedly. I also love how he just told her how happy he was to see her, and how even though he’s been hurt by love, he knows what he feels and can’t turn away from it.

I found it fascinating how Ji-ho learning about Se-hee’s previous love wasn’t an obstacle or this huge thing that divided them; instead it was their way forward. Ji-ho ended up telling Se-hee just the words he needed to articulate his path to her, and make sense of these feelings he has for her, because words that he knows to use like “love” are tainted by a painful experience. These two really are astonishingly great at communicating and finding that specific wavelength they need to reach one another. And I believe they’re going to get through the truth of Se-hee’s first marriage/love like total champs.

Another thing I’m totally loving is Sang-gu and Se-hee’s deep friendship. This isn’t the first time this writer has used something in a humorous way and then turned around the suckerpunched me right in the tear ducts with the same things. By having Se-hee manipulate Sang-gu early on while trying to get him off his back regarding his marriage, then seeing Sang-gu profound understanding of Se-hee’s emotions could not have been more perfectly executed. Gah, the relationships in this show make my heart do somersaults. How cute was Se-hee’s smile when Mom defended him? Adorable.

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Oh my God! This drama is the best thing in 2017... no, no... the best thing since I watch dramas ever (2012)... No, no, no...  the best I have seen in tv my whole life. What a pleasure! 😍

And today's episode, I feel, is the best in the whole serie so far. Not because of the kiss, that was beautiful and made me feel envious for the first time in ages. No... But because of the poem. Because of the truth in it, because they felt so much like real persons to me. Because I also come with my suitcase behind and my heart has been broken before, not even because of a man but because of family issues, and Jiho is sooo damn right, the fact that we all have a past, doesnt mean we can know what the present or future will be.
Every time we live, we live once for the first time, and everytime we love someone, we love them a lifetime, because we won't know when they would be gone. Our lives are fragile, but it is so beautiful to be alive😊...
And yet it is so hard!
I sympathize so much with See he today, when he said money is scarce. He is frugal, but even so, it is so expensive to buy a house!!!!. It is totally believable he would rent a room in order to compete the money for the month. He is not a guy going out, and not thinking about the next day. There are lots of people like that. I am a little bit like that too, and sometimes I feel I am even stingy. But I have been totally homeless, so I know. And I don't have a house now, nor I think I will be able to have in this system...

Anyway, I don't want to make my comment so long, but I also want to mention I laughed out loud like crazy the whole time See-he was making kimchi😂😂😂😂😂 He is hilarious, even when he doesn't want to be. And the fact that he takes so seriously his promises is rather reassuring, that he can be trusted and loved with all his quirkiness. I love you Oppa Seehe! You are absolutely my hero in Dramaland!!!! Like Jiho said, in this time Love exists. 😍😊😃

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“Because This is Our Best Slice of Life Drama in 2017”, hehehe.

Him making kimchi almost made me wish I could experience it too, floral pants and all 😂

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"Because This is The First Time We Have Bountiful Blatant Bra PPL"

"Because This is The First Time PPL Works Perfectly With a Theme in This Show" 😋

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YES! Who would have thought that bra PPL could have been built so gracefully into a story line!

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I was actually seriously thinking about it. The bra plot line is so well integrated in the story that I wonder what came first, the story line or the PPL. It seems to me that they first had the plot line and then they went "shopping" for a sponsor to match it.

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I wonder how some of these sponsor conversations went. "We want to use your product."
"Great!"
"To make fun of using your product in dramas."
"Huh? Um...ok? I guess."

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This writer knows the frustration of excessive, blatant PPL and thus tries to integrate it as smoothly as possible. Respect.

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True. We recall that Ji Ho had to write those ridiculous scenes to squeeze in so much PPL into one episode.

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What, is the writer really Ji Ho then?

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Haha wouldnt that be so funny? Meta upon meta. This is actually the writers life and she's writing it out as a drama and now it's been portrayed to us drama viewers. I wonder what JHs new script will be in this drama. "Btiofl"?

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I feel that the writer of this drama probably chose to make Ji Ho a writer too, to reflect what all of us viewers have noticed or guessed about PPL in shows. This, on top of the usual writers' experiences of frustration and challenges of being interfered with.

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@Maple hahaa I'm also expecting that Ji Ho's new script will be this very drama! Though I would have liked to see the youth drama she wrote in the early part of the drama as well.

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Can you guys tell me which books have been used in this drama & do they have english translations as well? I liked the poem so much and also the para from the book which Bok-nam gifted Ji-ho. 😇
I want to read them...please tell me the names guys.

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Yes, I was also reading the comment section hoping to find it. The poem I read in the recap and that I saw in subs were little different. The cover of the book and the poem was clearly shown in the drama so is there anyone who knows Korean well?

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I'm not sure if you'll get this notification, but I only recently started watching BTLIOF so I'm late to the comments section. I found a post compiling all the books that appeared (http://koreandramaland.com/the-books-in-because-this-is-my-first-life/), but it seems they haven't been translated in print. Only the Doris Lessing book is available in English.

The pink short story colleciton that Bok-nam gives to Ji-ho, World's End Girlfriend by Kim Yeon-su, has an audio version translated by the Literary Translation Institute of Korea: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bm_DFL7Los

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You know, since this serie, I am interested in Korean literature, but mostly in poetry. If you happen to find as well korean poetry translated into English,, please let me know. I will check the links you left anyways.
And enjoy the rest of the drama.

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I came across this blog that has translations of selected Korean poems while searching up the blue poetry collection:https://jaypsong.wordpress.com/. If you can read a bit of Korean, they also have the original poems attached, which is useful for learning Korean.

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Thanku for replying back. I will check this out

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Thank you so much @purpleteapot 😊 I am so sorry for being this late on this string. I'll definitely check this out.

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I have loved this series since episode one, but It just keeps on getting better and better. I think all of our love for BTLIOF is going to make Beanies spontaneously combust by episode 16.

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me too .I loved this show since episode one. with each new episodes I keep thinking this episode is my favourite but then the next one comes and I have another favourite. at this rate all episodes might turn out to be my favourites!

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You've totally worded what many of us feel about this lovely drama, I think.

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By the end of BTLIOF, I'll be back on hating monday

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Anyone foreign to Dramaland or Dramabeans must be so confused when scrolling through the fan wall on the weekend to see so many posts from Beanies about how excited they are that Monday is coming.

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I will hate Monday at least 5 times more than I did in the past.

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Maybe We need to rebrand Mondays after BTLIOF is over (cries) to put a positive spin on it. How about calling Monday “First Day” or “Uri Day” at least to ourselves?

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Great idea!

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I already hate Mondays, because this comes out on my Tuesday... hahaha

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Me too, Tuesdays and Wednesdays are my BTLIOF days!! I will really have a serious separation anxiety in December.. 😔

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It is no longer too early to say that this is becoming one of my all-time favorite dramas. The way the story develops and how the characters evolve, the perfect balance between moments of emotional heft and hilarity, the poignant reflection about oneself and society -this is truly a masterpiece in Dramaland.

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Me too! the only way this will be taken off in my all-time favorite list is if it won't have a happy ending.

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I've been thinking about this happy ending thing. This drama is about day to day struggles and ups and downs with relationships in life and every day is a new day. When writing a drama, where do you end it? You have to end it sometime, so I guess it depends on whether it ends on an "up" day or a "down" day. Our "happy ending" makes us think every day after that will be perfect and this drama shows it's never perfect but always hard work trying to understand our loves and ourselves. I'm so curious how this fantastic writer is going to end this for us because we know it will be happy and peaceful but how is she going to do that? I agree with everyone else that this has become my favorite drama ever.

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My guess is they end with SuJi and SangGu at their wedding.

They've had the more stereotypical romance at least from a public perspective. So it would be great to end the prime relationship doing something very 'normal'... going to their friend's wedding as a couple... but to the audience, they're there as the OTP.

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@elsol69, so I don't think Suji and Sang Gu get married at all. This drama is all about smashing women's stereotypes and empowering women. Suji states that she doesn't want to get married, and Sang Gu will respect that. It's going to take more than 4 episodes to change that girl's mind.

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I wonder if it will end a bit like My Name is Kim Sam Soon - where it ends happily, but the heroine also notes that a HEA isn't a guarantee, that it's possible that they may break up, so you really just try to live your life the best you can.

This drama gave me the similar feels from when I watched MNIKSS, but this drama feels closer to my heart because there are a lot more likable characters and because I'm 2 years older than Ji Ho and her friends, so I can relate to the struggles of our generation.

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@Ally <This drama is all about smashing women's stereotypes and empowering women.

I think that's true only to a certain extent though. I actually thought Sooji and Sangu's relationship took a step back in that sense in this episode.

Sangu meant well, but his solution of buying comfortable bras for Sooji, isn't actually a solution. She can wear a bra, including his comfortable bra, but reality is the men are going to look at her with or without it. Asking her to wear a bra does nothing to change that – and if the drama leaves it at that, it's just remaining with a our status quo. It's actually a little possessive on Sangu's part (she wears a bra for him, just so he doesn't feel uncomfortable about his woman), but does it actually empower Sooji? Or any other women? Of course it doesn't.

If we are honest, it's not Sooji that needs to dress differently, it's the men that need to change and stop treating women as objects for them to ogle and treat like they are not equals.

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I think I will consider it the "happy ending" if our lovely OTP will go and officially register their marriage. With both their personalities taking time to weight all pros and cons and think hard to arrive at that decision will prove that they both would like to be together for a long long time.

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I'm sure we'll get a happy ending!! I trust this writer.. 😀

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No, no... in my case, it is my all-time favorite drama. Period.
You know... After this drama, I will need therapy and just give myself a break... But I am sure I will write more about it in the last episode... (which by the way... will be in some two weeks???? Oh no!!!! Please don´t end)!!!!!! :(
I love you so much, show... You keep me daydreaming!!!

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I keep saying I love this show every episode. And aside from the Bok Nam as stalker plot line, I don't have any other complaints

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Bok Nam as Cupid had me rofl. Thanks @murasakimi 😂

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Honestly, it's rare for me to fall in love with the lines being exchanged by the characters in a drama. I just read them as it is just so I could understand what is going on. But never in my drama life would I appreciate such lines. They are deep and resonates so much with my life.

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Yes I agree with you so much! Beautiful lines and dialogue, so contemplative and self/life-reflective. I really liked this one from this episode,

“It’s not like you know all about today just because you lived yesterday.”

so beautifuuuul

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I couldn't tell if my heart imploded or exploded with that line! It was such a freeing line. I could feel Se hee's walls coming down with that line. Kudos to Jung So Min for her delivery of this line and all her lines.

Like murasakimi mentioned in her comments, it seems like Ji Ho and Se Hee always seem to find each other's wavelength and alway manage to say the exact words the other need to hear.

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40min in and never had I wanted an episode of a drama not to end as much as this.

I am so grateful to the writer for not following the simplistic approaches used in so many Kdramas. More than that, the writer appears to be deliberately starting scenes as a typical drama set-up and then shows us there is a different way. One that is true to the characters.

1: The discovery of the contracts wasn’t played for cheep laughs. Instead, the writer used the resulting conversations to allow the characters to pull back some of their self-delusions. It was almost the fact that hearing the thoughts out loud (rather than in their head voice) allowed them to argue the truth with themselves.

2: The writer didn’t play the kimchi as Ji-Ho dragging Se-Hee but instead, Se-Hee going independently once asked.

3: Revelations are not random surprises out of character Se-Hee’s back-story almost rewrote what we know about him and his reactions to Ji-Ho…. yet the new information was consistent with his previous behavior. Who had pegged that Se-Hee was as aware as he now appears. Moreover, many of his previous actions now do read as him trying to set boundaries as protection.

4: Show us….Don’t tell us.

5. People are nuanced. Se-Hee doesn’t have a problem with all families just his. I am curious as to the intent of his comment to Sang-Goo. “Its not just for the house….You have no idea how important the house is”. Ji-Ho’s mother in this episode…just :D

6. As Aretha Franklin put it “R. E. S. P. E. C. T!”. How often does this show shine when characters treat each other with respect? Neither are they doormats to others wishes but independent actors who also respect others agency.

7: You don’t always need to do flashbacks. The bus scene with the angry ajumma was almost as if they had got on with ‘Captain Subtext’ . It could have been shot by Edgar Wright – “Shaun of the Dead”.

8. Not wallowing in angst and relying on over emoting Ho-Rang & Won-Seok’s pain. Instead, the scenes of Ho-Rang were so thoughtfully constructed. She was framed to appear small in scene, isolated, often compressed or oblique and set at the edges of tableaus. The deliberate lack of her shots with Ji-Ho/Su-Ji ratcheted up the isolation/pressure she was under. This was contrasted to visuals for Won-Seok who was shot to appear small in scenes with/about Ho-Rang and her mother and then given some sense of normality and central framing in the office.

Although these two were only in the episode for a short period, the impact of this story telling was so touching. They are now on a precipice with either the smallest glimmer of hope for a way forward or the eventual end. Its like both are choking down their words at this point. Frozen to where they are scared to say it out loud as the act of letting that thought out will make the worst happen. Even if separation is their outcome, no one wishes that pain on people. They...

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Cont.
... They obviously deeply care for each other, but…sometimes that is not enough and its heartbreaking.

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it was so heartbreaking. by the time won seok asked her for a date, we just all knew. i couldn't imagine, starting all over again for Ho-rang, after 7 years, and she's 30 now. and how much she loves won seok. my heart goes for her in this episode (albeit, very short scene). i wish happy end for both of them, together or not.

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The tie gift for Won Seuk, apart from nice PPL, seems to symbolize how he's being choked by a noose of marriage. 🕴 I understand him but can't sympathise with him too much, or with Ho Rang. They are starting to realize they went wrong somewhere but they STILL don't talk... And now we learn that they have been deceiving her parents about living together for the last 7 years ... The whole situation is going to explode and Ho Rang will be more hurt than Won Seuk. I don't care for him, sorry. He criticized Se Hee's app name. 😾

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@WishfulToki

Even when we know the issues and the shared 'fault'. It doesn't remove my sympathy for either of them.

If we take that HR+WS represent the traditional couple - In the society, they were brought up that this is the normal way to behave, and explicitly trained to. Ho-Rang's mothers words were "...she will be a good housewife, she learned from me ever since she was young...". Then when the rules change or they weren't given all the information, I can not abandon their hurt.

We know that previously - even in the west - they would have stayed together as there would be no other option. Anyone of a certain age will know of many couples who ended up only living a cohabitation of 2 lives of desperation - and some the eventual horrors this disfunction inflicts.

P.S. I loved your point of the subtext of the tie. I had thought it a strange gift but now I see it.

I think his re-naming scene is in the same vein. He is desperately trying to convince himself marriage is the next step. It also allows the show to frame him normally and centre to people - while Ho-Rang is being further isolated. As others have noted. Ho-Rang in the society and personally has the most to loose from their breakup.

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He's also being choked by giving up his app to work for another app. Yes, there is the marriage noose, but there is also the noose of financial reality. How long could he survive on his failure of an app? At some point, you may have to follow the Suji route and work for The Man so you can give something back to the person you love/the person who has taken care of you. At least, Sang Gu is a good boss.

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I love how you interpreted Ho-rang and WOn-seok's scenes.

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That was very well put. Thank you.

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Honestly, I look for Tom's analysis with every recap, especially with the angles and framing and cinematography. It makes me appreciate the drama even more (IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE). Thank you for your unique perspectives, Tom!

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Here, here!

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@whoopeeyoo
That will make a guy blush.

I read other people's insights and am always amazed at their beautiful writing. So many Beanies are extraordinarily talented and I wish I could do even half of that.

...Thanks for the kind words.

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Totally agree with #2. Probably one of my favorite Se Hee moments.

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#1. Exactly. I am really thankful that at this point, it was to Soo Ji that the contract was revealed to and not to Ho Rang. I felt like if it was her who discovered it, she may not be very understanding of it. Not that I find her childish, but she views marriage very seriously.

#2. YES! Definitely. Se Hee needed not to be told twice. I also loved how Ji Ho asked him to go there thinking that he wouldn't be able to work because of her patriarchal family. Made it more amazing to her when she realized he did actually work.

#7. I so agree. I laughed so much on that scene (I was watching while working). But it did feel very effective to show a) what Ji Ho was thinking for Se Hee to hear; and b) to emphasize that Ji Ho is slowly turning into that bitter person because of her misunderstandings about Se Hee (that part made me remember Go Back Couple, that wife-husband dynamics).
I guess this show is trying to let Koreans know that the best way to move forward would be to let go of their unhealthy traditions involving family relationships — patriarchal, daughter-in-law treatment, parents controlling, etc. I almost felt like it was showing that the reason for most of the marital problems are involvement of the in-laws, which is actually very true. Even the Bible says that a husband and wife should live independently of their in-laws. Respect is one thing, but letting them make you do things out of just "being in-laws" is another thing.

#8. I love your analysis on Won Seok and Ho Rang. It's painful to watch their scenes, not because they're not well executed, but rather they are very much well executed that we all feel the dreaded mismatch of priorities weighing much more than their love for each other.

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(1) "This is how you kiss", just wow, Se-hee... WOW. He's a player isn't he, this is totally a player line.
(2) "Should we do it some more?" "Yes". Wow, Ji-ho, you two... (I have no complaints)
(3) The look of happiness on his face when Ji-ho appeared at her parents' house.
(4) Se-hee in those floral workpants making kimchi, omg.
(5) Sang-gu buying Su-ji a bag full of bras.
(6) Su-ji throwing her cigarette into that creepy Mr Park's coffee.

On Se-hee & Ji-ho: Omg, these 2. It's so strange how they feel so perfect for each other even though they're so formal with each other. And it's adorable how SH knows that JH is pissed off with him. I honestly do wonder what's the motivation behind the sudden kiss. As SG mentioned, there's no way that SH wouldn't know about JH's feelings for him, but that he was probably scared. So I wonder what made him overcome that fear?

I've read somewhere that the feeling of being in a new, unfamiliar place gives people certain adrenaline rushes that makes it easier to take risks and fall for someone. Hmm.

On Sang-gu and Su-ji: When Mr Park threw his food on her with the purpose of getting her to take off her coat, I wanted to kick him where it hurts. He's such a disgusting creep (him and the rest of them), I honestly can't imagine how Su-ji must feel working with them on a daily basis. I actually cheered for her when for the first time she actually confronted them instead of slinking away while they smoked. She and SG are just cuteeee.

On Won-seok and Ho-rang: At this point I almost feel bad for WS, poor boy. He doesn't seem prepared for marriage and he's probably feeling so pressurized by HR + her family. Their situation almost reminds me slightly of Seol and JM in Fight My Way, and I almost think that they might end up separating by the end of the show? I kind of ship him + Bo-mi...

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and to think we all were giddy at the thought of Se-Hee asking for permission to kiss circa ep16 or 2048... ! Lolol!

He came out with the canons lor.. no simple innocent permission asking.. this Master correcting things! <3

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As a diligent and dutiful teacher, he first carefully explained (again and again) the ineptitude and the misinterpretation of the art of kissing, and proceed to demonstrate to his pupil how it should correctly be administered. When the student seemed dazed and confused, he then asked if a repeat demonstration would be needed to deepen the impression. Se-hee patiently complied when the student replied in the affirmative.

A committed educator deserves praise.

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I suddenly really, really want to go to the School of Sehee.

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I so wish that it is open enrollment and rolling admission.

This school definitely will make you sign a contract.

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Haha . School of Se Hee!! I'm enrolling too!! 🙋🙋🙋

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Hahah! Kimbap nooonaaa - what expert analysis!

Makes me wonder if you are one committed educator too.. or have had the experience of learning from one?! *wiggles eyebrows*

PS your name as noona is so perfect... can we forgo traditional gender forms & I continue to call u noona rather than unnie?! i like noona more anyway!

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Awww thanks 🌈🦄
YOU can call me whatever you like (especially now I am addressing you with emoji😆)

Haha I guess it is pretty obvious that I am in education. More specifically I have worked as an administrator who wrote many faculty evaluations so the last comment took seconds to type. (BTW it is rather embarrassing to admit that I am a teacher since I have made so many typos and grammatical errors on this site....looking forward to the day when we can finally edit our comments)

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(weird fact but if I had to call my older brother anything Korean (you know, hypothetically speaking) I'd much prefer to call him Hyung and Oppa, despite that being technically wrong, cos he's much more of a hyung than an oppa...)

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Hahaha! Trust an educator to convert a wiggly eyebrows wink wink question into a proper one! :-P

but that is soo cool - teaching really is an amazing profession. perhaps one day i'l move to that. and really typos are inherent in the online world esp cuz of autocorrect. dont worry about it on DB.. it's bad enough to pay attention in real world!

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there's no way that SH wouldn't know about JH's feelings for him, but that he was probably scared

The moment Se-hee asked Ji-ho whether he upset her by drawing boundaries between them, is when it clicked with me that he probably knew about her feelings. It's just the way he looked at her, how gentle he was.
The question for me was always about his own awareness and whether he was willing to face his own emotions.
Well, I was pleasantly surprised in this episode when he took the lead. I never expected that either.

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i know right ? hug the writer. we all know they were going to kiss in the preview, but it was still surprising that the kiss was actually initiated by him, by him!

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I kind of feel sorry to writer-nim because for a sec I doubt the kiss scene. at first I thought the phone ring is alarm, So I say, "snap, is that a dream?" but thank drama god, it's real!!

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Because he can be a stiff person at times, we expected him to be awkward in matters of love. He sure proved us wrong! I think most of us have figured out that Se Hee appears stiff and awkward and cold because he is actually a very sensitive guy. I'm glad to have that totally confirmed by Sang Gu. Sang Gu is also such a sensitive sweetheart. It makes sense now why Sang Gu and Se Hee have been friends for so long.

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Yes! Great points!

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he even can ask if Ji Ho want some more. arghhhh >,<
the episode suppose to be Ji Ho's desire but at the end it's Se Hee who ask for them to sleep together. lol

How Lee Min Ki can pull such small smile gesture and make my heart flutter every single time.

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I think it was the perfect storm of all the right things happening to help Se-hee decide to go for the kiss. As you said, it was an unfamiliar (and beautiful and romantic) place. Also, he was probably still a bit tipsy from how much the ahjussi made him drink. Ji-ho had just said all the right words to move his heart... And if Ji-ho got to surprise kiss him once, then he could do the same!

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Oh yeah, also I think that his earlier snoop around her room was a sign that he was interested in getting to know her better. And once he did, he fell for her a little more!

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From this episode, I learned that Se Hee is a pretty nosy guy. He seems standoffish, but look at how he relished talking about Sang Gu and Su Ji's relationship and contract, and then snooping around Ji Ho's room. And people say women are the nosy, gossip-y ones!

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Hehe, I thought that was a mark of his closeness with Ji Ho ~ he has someone to talk about people with and laugh ~ Ji Ho will have to get used to the quiet guy actually being comfortable to gossip haha.

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What really surprised me was that he said, "There's something that I've been wanting to correct...." What, this has been on his mind since the bus stop kiss? And he was restraining himself?

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Exactly my thoughts!! Did he fell for JH right there and then??

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I noticed it too and made me think that he has been liking her for a while!

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Turns out he locked his room to control himself pffft..

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"I think it was the perfect storm of all the right things happening to help Se-hee decide to go for the kiss. As you said, it was an unfamiliar (and beautiful and romantic) place. Also, he was probably still a bit tipsy from how much the ahjussi made him drink. Ji-ho had just said all the right words to move his heart... And if Ji-ho got to surprise kiss him once, then he could do the same!"

I agree with everything that you said. I just want to add 1 more thing, That smile and happiness that Se-hee had when Ji-hoo arrived, I think that woke him up a bit as well.

Like you said @rinny, it was the perfect storm! XD

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That kiss seriously!
I loved the little directorial details like focusing on their hands. Especially Se-hee putting his hand on her back. That was a strangely affectionate gesture (in a good way), but also hot and sexy.

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That line really! "This is how you kiss" I literally jumped and repeat the scene like, wait, can't remember how many times. Lol

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That scene needs to be played to all of the kdrama PD's out there - This is how you direct a kiss scene

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On Won Seok and Ho rang -- I am curious about how Bo-mi acts towards him. I can't tell if she's trying to read him or has interest in him romantically, or something else. She's such a wild card.

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This drama never fails to surprise every episode and it's getting better and better. Conversations in some dramas tend to be boring (and usually, I skip most of them) but in this drama, the convos among the characters really matters. I love how simple and straightforward their dialogues especially the narrations.

BTLIOF is really shaping to be the best drama this year. Please be good until the end, show. Please never fail us!

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"But in this drama, the convos among the characters really matter".... Yes!!! The conversations! the conversations are really building up the story in such a marvelous way.
I mean... We love Korean Dramas because of the portray of emotions, which once in a while make us squee beautifully, but here it is just most of the time, because of the depth of all of our characters... I am so happy to take part in this while airing!!!

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"I am so happy to take part in this while airing!!!"

Me too.. 🙋 I usually watched completed dramas so I could binge watch.. I only follow currently airing dramas if my bias is on them.. LMK was not my bias but now he's taking over LJG on my top list.. hahahaha 😝😂

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I loved the kiss scene!!!
that is how you kiss yo!!!
sehee is no longer a robot!!!
yayyy!!!
I loved this weeks episodes!!!
damn that kiss!!!

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I agree, that tutorial kiss was awesome and hot as hell !!

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It is, indeed, the best kiss I have ever seen in all dramas I have seen in my whole life... really....

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they might win a best kiss award!

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I agree. This kiss scene was amazingly done and I couldn`t breathe while watching it but when it comes to a passionate kiss, I can`t stop thinking about Cha Seung Won and Kim Sun A`s kiss in The City Hall ( the kiss in the car at dawn). They almost swallowed each other^_^ :v

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Another Oh Hae Young... that was two people in a cheesegrater levels of RAW. I, literally, felt the guilty watching them, like I was in a moment that needed privacy.

This was a more 'perfect' kiss because of everything around it out... but AOHY was something I'd never seen on screen anywhere before.

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I do agree with you here. Eric’s kiss with Seo Hyun Jin was off the charts!!!

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ASAAAAAAA!!! *jumps around squeeing* *unable to contain excitement* *ashdnfjgksjshshdhdgsgaf*
I love these two!!!! 😍😍😍
They make every Monday worth it!
I especially loved it when Se hee bounced up in excitement, with a love struck glint in his eyes when he saw ji ho has come for him!! 😍😍😍💕💕💕
I can't with this couple!! They match each other soooo well!!

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I have been loving them soooo much that I even dream with them. Can you believe it??? Dreaming, either daydreaming or during my sleep in the night... Crazy... I know, but I am confessing my weakness...

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I just simply can't believe that I'm this early in BTLIOF recap. I always read the recap when the recap reached 250+, thus lost all spirit to write comment!

Every episode of BTLIOF is perfection! Ji Ho thinks that Se Hee won't know that she's mad at him, while the truth is Se Hee knows that she is mad at him. Hahaha Ji Ho turning into ahjumma who always curses her husband😂😂

CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE KISS?? MY MYYY MR. ROBOT IS NOT A ROBOT IN KISSING

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Omg, high five. I saw 5 comments and I shrieked! Woo hoo I made it to the partyyy. 🎉🎊

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He's such a player robot! "This is how you kiss." and "Do you understand now? Or do you have to do it again?"

KYAHHHHHHHH!!!!

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I died and live again after watch this episode. Ommmmgeeeeeeee
#thebestdramaever #Goblinwhat?

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#iwouldntgothatfar #Gongyooisstillabetterkisser

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I love watching this drama, something about it that just gets every type of emotion in me, its gripping and charming and most importantly i feel for all the three couples.
- Sehee working so hard to make kimchi was so funny to watch.
- Glad that Sangyu and so ji learned about the fake marriage, they both had meaningful talks with OTP!
- I love jiho's mum, her heart is so beautiful and she understands her daughter and sehee's character.
- Yaaay for the beach kiss ❤ it had me screaming and jumping around like an insane person because it was so beautiful to see them finally embracing their feelings for each other.
- I feel very sad for horang and WS because you can tell they love each other but they don't communicate at all, a break up is inevitable at this point of their relationship.

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I was literally SCREAMING with laughter during the kimchi-making scenes. Lee Minki is just so hilarious with the physical comedy. The garlic-pounding in particular had me laughing so hard I couldn't breathe, I swear.

These two really are perfect for each other, and the way they work to understand each other even when they don't consciously realize that's what they're doing just gets me right in the heart. That poem was perfect, Jiho's thought processes about it were perfect, their beach conversation was perfect, and that kiss was beyond perfect. It was everything I ever thought I could want and more.

I love how this writer develops their relationship in such an organic, measured way. Every step feels like it comes at exactly the right time, no matter how long or how little it takes them in drama-time. I feel so assured that the writer knows exactly what she's doing and exactly where we're headed that I can just relax and enjoy the journey these two odd little love-ducks are taking towards each other.

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Everything was perfect and organic, as you said. I had no doubt that the moment Se Hee realized he might have room in his heart for Ji Ho, he'd act upon it. Still, that kissing lesson caught me by suprise (and like all of you I had seen the preview *cough* several times).

The only reason I haven't favorited this show is that I still skip Ho Rang+Won Seuk scenes, and Su Ji+Ma Ceo doesn't convince me. Narratively the two secondary pairs are interesting because of the social commentary... but my whole heart has already been given to Uri Couple. ❤️️

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This drama is the only reason why I'm excited for Monday!

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Same here. Is the only one I watch almost raw and then several times with caps... It is the only one that keeps me even dreaming about it.

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It’s prolly the only one I watch live stream over the internet, then watch again in subs, then again while reading recaps, and then spend the rest of the day reading all your wonderful comments ;D I’m officially hooked man!

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I think this is the first drama that I want to watch the episodes from various sources for comparing translations so I don’t miss any of the subtlety in the writing.

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I DO THIS TOO!

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Hey there.... I did the same too!! lol

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Second this :
"I found it fascinating how Ji-ho learning about Se-hee’s previous love wasn’t an obstacle or this huge thing that divided them; instead it was their way forward."

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OMG this show is the end of me! And See Hee in sexy player mode..... NO COMMENT
I agree with your comment on JH finding out about See He’s past. It totally helped to build the bridge between these two. JH found the right words to tell him and help him overcome his fear

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KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA <3

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This romance operates in the mundane, but the big moments are bold, brave, and overflowing with warmth and tenderness.

Yes, yes and YES!!!
That's the key element. It's a combo of lots of things working right to make the magic happen, but that's THE element that pulls me every moment, the key that turns me into a complete fool, chanting incessant prayers for subtitles to appear, or wishing my weekend away (which is indeed, RARE!) ...

Not only that, I feel for every relationship in this drama ...
It shocks me, but I don't hit the forward button not even for a split second ... and I wouldn't recommend any of you do … because you might end up missing a monumental frame (like the ocean scene, or the poem) or a comical spectacle (like Se-hee pants with the perfect BG music) ... And so, so many more!!!

I can't say much, other than I freaking love this drama!

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Yes! The forward button is retired while watching this show but I am now wearing out my rewind button!! It seriously takes me forever to finish an episode because I just immediately want to rewatch so many scenes either for the funny or simply just want to savior over some of the beautiful lines.

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I also feel sorry about WS. He is by no means prepared to be married and marrying could only damage them more. But they are still so individuals in their aspirations... It cannot work, at least not realistically.

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Yeah he is definitely not ready to get married. He likes where he's at right now, at least in his relationship with Ho Rang, and the rest is his ambitions in business.

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Se-hee, I never thought he has this side of him. It was so adorable my god, the drama is perfect to pieces. And when he called Ji-hoo pretty it was ROFL 😂 the drama is damn cute. This slice of life drama is fuelling my fantasy about life haha🤣.

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Haha, I like that your handle can also act as your subject line. 👍

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😂

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I totally agree with Sehee. It's not just because of the house or money, but you can't ignore the fact that it means much more to both of them. I mean, Horang and Wonseok can't get married because they lack those two and now they're over. But Sehee and Jiho are able to harmoniously live together because they're honest with each other, unlike Horang and Wonseok. And when someone isn't being honest in the relationship, it just piles up until it's too big and difficult to ignore.

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Exactly. I wholeheartly agree with you. WS and HR relationship shows that without honesty and communication, loving someone will never and is never enough to build a solid and healthy relationship/mariage. By contrast JH and SH mariage wether fake or not is built on trust, mutual understanding and honesty. They are a team: E.g. They planned their mariage together, each person doing the best in order to overspend. Whereas with WS and HR after he got her the ring, she was the only one planning without once asking herself are WE as a team going to be able to afford it, but rather selfishly thinking about what her dream wedding should be like.
I personally think that WS and HR are not meant to be together, the passion is there, but if you take away their passion there is no nothing left that links them together

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I mostly agree, but I feel like you may be putting more blame on HR than she really deserves. In the case of wedding expenses, she was operating under the impression that WS was still saving for their future as per there previous agreement of so much every month; she thought they had more money than they did. That particular failure in communication is more on WS than HR. If he couldn't save what they'd agreed on he needed to tell her that (although she probably should have checked the balance more often)!

For me, the savings account puts a lot of her actions in perspective. They had saving for their future for years, the account was going to mature soon... in her mind the future can start now, beginning with the wedding she's wanted for 7 years.

She hints (dumb), but does eventually put the idea out there. He rejects the idea, largely because of money. But then he proposes, so he's OK with the idea of marriage (yeah, under pressure, but he did ask and he's never wanted to break up), and now he's starting a new job. With the job and their joint savings, is it really so out there to assume the wedding can take place soon? Plus, a lot of grooms really don't care to have much say in the actual wedding planning.

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I have to say this... especially because I'm a guy and also because SangGu says it -- "Do you really think he (Se Hee) doesn't know how she (Ji Ho) feels?"

I have to ask that question about Won Seok. How can we look at Se Hee and say "Oh, of course he knew! Yeah, the entire time." But then look at Won Seok who has been in a relationship for 7 years, some of them living with her, and that there was a savings book for marriage... and then not say "How did you NOT know what Ho Rang wanted, thought about marriage and kids and everything?!?"

He spent 7 years with her and clearly never thought about anything she was saying beyond them being words coming out of her mouth.

I go back to the early scenes with SangGu and Won Seok and I think -- "Uh dude, you're the one in the seven year relationship... why are you asking him what she could want?

Because Won Seok's problem isn't that Ho Rang wants to get married 'now' or 'sooner'... it's that she wants to get married and her idea of marriage follows social norms (duh!) and Won Seok doesn't wanted and never did.

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^this
It goes back to the beginning episodes, where Ho Rang got angry for Won Seok talking down to her. Won Seok doesn’t take her seriously, his focus is all elsewhere with his work, even on things he promised like the joint savings account for their future.

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I see a lot of discussions on HR+WS's relationship, and I've been restraining myself from joining because it seems a little intense, but I just had to jump in on this one.

I don't think it's fair to put this on Won-seok alone. I think they're both at fault. I get your logic of asking about WS's obliviousness to what HR actually wanted (marriage), but she never communicated it well. She was always playing mind-games and hoping he'd know what she's thinking. And it was never explicitly stated that the bank book was for marriage. They planned to move to a better place, and including marriage in that was HR's assumption. Now, it takes two to tangle and I think WS should've been more clear about the difficulties he was facing in his life and not be vague, but then again HR should've also cared about him more as a person and not just a potential husband.

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Thanks for adding your thoughts! I totally agree, now that you mention it, although we have learned that SeHee is much more observant than the average person, so we shouldn’t hold WS to *that* high a standard (he had years, though, so no excuses).

@hotcocoagirl, oooh, great point! I think her reaction to WonSeok’s conclusion that she was upset with the floor model is also very telling. She could have just as easily concluded he was an utter idiot, but instead she was super upset that he thought so little of her. She obviously feels disrespected or is very insecure about his feelings. Though, to be fair, she’s also very disrespectful in regards to how she treats his nerdy monologues; she doesn’t need to listen all the time if they’re too boring, but she does need to respect his interests. Sigh, the cracks in their relationship are just so big. It makes me sad because as really do adore both of them and want them to be happy. The more we learn the less likely it seems they can find that together.

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Thanks for putting my thoughts into words!

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Same here. I originally thought Ho Rang was off her rocker to think she could have a wedding and her imagined married life with their finances the way they were (twin bed for two people?!!!), but this episode made me a lot more sympathetic. That savings account scene also put things into perspective for me. That would explain why they're living in such cramped quarters. She was probably stocking away 1/3 of her income for 7 years. And had been expecting Won Seok to do the same. That is enough for a modest wedding (even mortgaged-burdened, cheapskate Se Hee and unemployed Ji Ho could afford one) and a down payment for a bigger place. And since Won-seok now has a steady income and because they've developed skills on living frugally, it could have worked. But it turned out that Wonseok wasn't able to save. it was a sad scene. I was expected HR to get mad, but it was so much sadder to find her disappointed and also starting to realize that even though they love each other, they don't have the same goals...or at least their goals are years out-of-sync with each other.

Yes HR and WS can be annoying, but they also feel painfully real.

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I think that’s why we don’t like Ho Rang and WS so much.
It’s just too painfully real.

Reality of life can really bog down a relationship.
I would prefer to cut Ho Rang more slack. She has been supporting WS all the past 7 years and in the end, they are having different dreams.
It so easy to say why can’t they just talk and communicate. But the truth is that how can we verbalize every single thing? We are not a program that just say yes or no.
Deep down, we wish that our partners see the sacrifices that we made and not having to broadcast it.
We wish that they will understand our tiredness and help without our asking.
Just like Ho Rang wished that WS will finally give a ring and give her a home.

It simply means so much more that we can get the lives we want without having to demand verbally for it.

The fact of life is that “ sometimes Love just ain’t enough.

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Both are at fault, I just use the whole wedding thing as an example, and since it is not a shared dream, I couldn't talk about WS. As See Hee pointed out he is not honest with herself and neither himself. He led her on for so long knowing what her ultimate dream was. He wants the confort and security a stable relationship can bring, but he doesn't have the gust to put in the necessary effort to take it further. I mean she has given up so much for him. What about him though ??!! Not much

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Se-hee dramatically snapping on his gloves! 😂😂😂

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I had to press 'mute' because the music almost made me die of laughter while I was sitting in a public place (the things we do for wifi...) But I still managed to look very red and awkward trying not to laugh staring at a silent screen.
Can someone internally combust of laughter? 🤣🤣
Master of Kimchi and Kissing, I salute you.

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He was like in Iraq mission :D :D :D

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I LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS SHOW AND I CAN’T GET MYSELF TO SAY ANYTHING MORE COHERENT THAN THIS.

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This is the first slice of life K-drama I've followed and I just love how the dialogue and issues explored feel so real. The mixture of poignant and humorous moments (KIMCHI hahaha) is really well done.

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I've only begun watching drama's this year, binge wachting alot of them over the past weeks. But I stepped into BTLIOF at the beginning, and boy.... this show is sooo good. The writing is so on point, characters are well developed, - i cried at the beach kiss scene because it was so lovely - it's a shame it's going to end in 4 episodes..

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as some Beanies know,I mostly post and spam my fanwall about 2 things ---- Gikwang and OurFirstLife,with some Winner and Block B in between.

I 💕 this drama,episode after episode,week on week

aside from that epic 💏 what stood out for me this episode is the shift to SeHee's perspective

*starts liking all comments before mine*

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Hahahaha the *starts liking all comments before mine*, I don't even know what to comment since everything that's running on my mind about this episode was already mentioned by other beanies that's why I just keep on upvoting every single comment. :D

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Oh YEAH! I watched this raw the first time, and cheered when Se Hee gave an internal monologue reciting POETRY of all things.
Thank you BTIOFL for giving me a rom-com with a slice of life feel and restoring my faith that kdramas can do romance. I have become allergic to fluffy rom-coms, but this drama is really going for TRUE LOVE and that it is hard work.
*continues liking all comments*

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All the comments in already... thumbs up!

But what struck me this episode is how GOOD an actor Jung So-Min is.

I especially liked her conversation with Soo Ji - no loud words, no tears, friends sharing and not judging... but how she conveys the range of emotions in that series of scenes depicting the conversation.

I am no judge of acting talent, but in my opinion, a masterclass in acting.

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The subtle acting of all of them is amazing, even the idol actors. You can tell that all the actors know exactly who their character is in every moment.

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My favourite moments of this episode (there are too many)
1.JH- good job. ...poker face
SH (to cat)-she's definitely mad at me..
2.WS- Who named the app?
Everyone looks at SH.....who hides behind his tab. ...then glares daggers at WS
3.SH- I'm going to my In laws to make kimchi
Everyone else- our app name is fine as it is
4.SJ finally giving park a piece of her mind. ....go girl!
5.the bus ride home and the overlapping conversation was hilarious
6.SH- SJ and SG don't look good together
JH- WTH? ??!
7.the horror of realising their contracts got exchanged...priceless expressions. ..
8.JH- I may never know the way to his heart. ..but he knows where to go and make kimchi...and I like him
9.SH in ahjumma pants making kimchi! !
10.JH mom- why are you hitting my son in law you wench? SH's smile at that..
11.SH's expression when JH came
12.SH- did you come because you were worried?
JH- yes
SH- I'm very happy to see you
13.SG- I bought some for you. ..hope they're comfortable. .If not ..I'll keep searching. ..SJ kiss on his cheek
14.SH calling out JH and running to her
15.SJ-my friend likes your friend..it's a one sided love
SG- you think SH doesn't know?
16.SH's narration of the poem
17.JH- even though you have experienced it before ...The person you're experiencing it with is a first...you don't know about today just because you lived yesterday. .SH smile at that
18.and finally. ..drumroll....
SH- what you did at the bus stop wasn't a kiss...wasn't even a peck...just lips making physical contact with lips
JH- I know. ..I was bad
SH- that can't be called a kiss. ..This. ...is how you kiss....SWOON
SH(very respectfully)- do you get it now...or you want to do it some more?
JH- I want to do it more
SH smile before going in for the second. ...
Perfect kiss...perfect backdrop. ..perfect ost. ..perfect ending. ..
WOW ...couldn't make it shorter than this...Thank you for your patience and sorry for the extremely long post

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Number 3 especially!!! ha ha... because it was developed so naturally by the confluence of two events.

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I was palpitating from no.14 onwards.
Se Hee running towards Ji Hoois oddly very attractive to me!

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I know right! even when he ran to her in episode 9 to 'save her'...

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number 1. hahahaha...it's so cute...
the best also when Se-hee open the bus window. i laugh out loud over that...LMK expression. it's priceless.

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Number 5 - That scene was so hilarious! I still keep laughing every time I think about it. The look in JH's eyes when she would hear the ahjumma speak. rofl

I was either laughing or smiling ear to ear throughout the majority of this episode. Speaking of smiles..........

Number 19(?)... ALL of SH's little smiles. He has smiled more in this episode than all the previous ones combined!!

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This drama is just so warm. The kiss scene was pretty much unexpected but I am so glad that he's the one that initiated it <3

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I totally forgot the kissing scene too that qas on the preview and actuallybwished that its not a dream or an illusion. Then this scene came in at the end of episode 11 and it was so smooth and special and romantic. Truly the writer has a knack on surprising us million time already.
I love all the expressions and movements of Se Hee. Especially when he smiled upon seeing Ji Ho. Kyaaaah. 😍😍

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O.MY.GOD!!!

They (the writers) tricked us again. I thought that was a dream or fantasy.

*I died, rose again, watched it again* repeat.

Btw, I think Ji-Ho is a Defender, Se-Hee is a Keeper and Horang is a Striker. Or perhaps SangGu is a Striker?