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Because This Life Is Our First: Episode 14

This episode our hero reflects on his emotions and feelings, realizing just how he feels about his wife. Unbeknownst to him, her words have found their way into his once dry heart, and as the trees around him signal the start of winter, spring has already bloomed inside of him. Words can plant new feelings of love, but they can also leave behind scars that last for years. And while spoken words may die as soon as they reach the ears, they can live on if they’re harbored in the heart.

 
Episode 14: “Because this is my first confession”

Unable to reach Ji-ho, Se-hee walks around the neighborhood looking for her, and runs into Jung-min. Both freeze, instantly recognizing each other, and from a few feet away, Ji-ho sees their encounter and hides behind a pillar.

Still frozen in mid-stretch, Jung-min stammers out a greeting, and hands Se-hee her business card. They quickly separate, too frazzled to hold a conversation, and Jung-min retreats to the car as Se-hee turns away.

Ji-ho returns to the car once Se-hee is gone, and excuses herself to walk home. Jung-min assumes that her husband is coming to pick her up, and readily lets her leave.

Se-hee puts away Jung-min’s card, and calls Ji-ho again. She answers this time, and tells him that she’s right here. He looks around and sees her right next to him, much to his relief. She apologizes for not answering before, and they walk home together.

Once home, Se-hee makes tea in a thermos, and hands it to Ji-ho to drink throughout the night to soothe her insides after drinking. As they say goodnight, Se-hee asks if she wants to sleep together again tonight. She turns down his offer, explaining how she snores more when she’s tired, and Se-hee watches her retreat to her room.

Ji-ho sits in bed, remembering Jung-min’s story about a painful past, now also recalling Se-hee’s previous explanations of marriage and his wish to live an uneventful life. Meanwhile, Se-hee recalls Ji-ho’s words from the bus, describing Jung-min as a protector.

He calls Ji-ho despite the late hour, and congratulates her on getting a chance to write again. Ji-ho seems to see past his words, and thinks to herself, “This man is torn. He is afraid. He is nervous.”

Sporting a shorter haircut, Ho-rang meets with Sang-gu since she has no one else to seek advice from concerning Won-seok. She wonders if he won’t come back even if she begs, and Sang-gu explains that Won-seok decided to let her go because he felt that he was making her unhappy.

As they leave the coffee shop, a finance officer, Shin Young-hyo, from Sang-gu’s company runs into them. Sang-gu introduces Ho-rang, and while Young-hyo stares intently at her, she’s too preoccupied with other thoughts and barely gives him a glance.

At the bus stop, Young-hyo drives his car up to Ho-rang, and offers her a ride since he heard where she was going from Sang-gu. Though Ho-rang refuses, his persistence wins, and she sits awkwardly in his car as he tries to strike up a conversation.

He asks if she doesn’t recognize him, and introduces himself as the person from Sang-gu’s app who wants to get married. He tells her that she was the first person he chatted with on the app, and was disappointed when she stopped replying.

Ho-rang describes her actions as meaningless, but Young-hyo playfully calls her out on her attempt to draw a line between them, and her cold responses don’t curb his enthusiasm. Maintaining her distance, Ho-rang quickly leaves his car once they arrive at her place, and slams the door before he can say bye.

Ho-rang stares at all the memories stored in the rooftop apartment, from the pink couch to the board of pictures. She takes down each polaroid of them as a couple, and while she packs her belongings, Ho-rang takes off her ring. Coincidentally, Won-seok arrives right then, also here to pack his stuff.

He sees her out, but before she leaves, Ho-rang admits that he was right, deciding now to be honest with herself. She goes down the stairs, and to her surprise, she finds Young-hyo waiting for her. Noticing her flu-like symptoms, he couldn’t leave her to carry her stuff alone, and offers her a ride home.

Catching Won-seok from the corner of her eye, Ho-rang relents, and accepts the ride. From the rooftop, Won-seok watches her leave while Ho-rang looks back forlornly at the place she once called home.

Jung-min reviews the lawsuit with Ji-ho, and asks if she’ll be all right with the investigation and questioning. Ji-ho nods, understanding that it’s inevitable, but Jung-min warns her that things might get messy since this involves the broadcasting industry.

Onto a brighter topic, Jung-min shows Ji-ho a writing contract, and tells her to read over it before signing. Ji-ho immediately comments on the proposed payment, and Jung-min wonders if they offered her too little. Ji-ho explains that it’s the opposite—the payment is too high.

Jung-min sighs, and gives Ji-ho a little life lesson: “Even if you’re surprised, you should go outside and express it alone. When negotiating a contract, how can you reveal everything to the enemy?”

To Jung-min’s surprise, Ji-ho answers, “You’re not my enemy.”

Jung-min smiles at her response, and explains that they offered her the normal rate for new writers. Though her company rarely signs contracts with writers, when they do, they do it properly since it means they want to work with that person for a long time.

Se-hee scrolls through Jung-min’s company’s website, and finds an interview of her. One of the questions asks about money, and Jung-min’s response says that she started this work because she was in desperate need of it.

Ji-ho and Jung-min go out for lunch together, and Ji-ho has something to ask. She wonders how Jung-min would feel if she met her almost-husband again, and Jung-min finds her question strange, especially since she recently met him by coincidence. Holding her gaze, Ji-ho reveals the truth: Se-hee is her husband.

Driving to work, Su-ji remembers Sang-gu’s urging to face the world rather than run away, as well as his promise to support her. Fueled by his words, Su-ji confronts Park, inviting him to a smoke, and once outside, she tells him how horrible the last three years have been working with him.

She constantly worries about his sexual harassment, and only has painful memories of him. Without an ounce of guilt, he simply asks what she wants, so Su-ji tells him to give her a formal apology in front of their team. She sincerely wants to end this toxic relationship, and asks him to show his sincerity in return.

Sang-gu waits for Su-ji, and as she approaches, she suddenly runs into his arms and says that she’s glad to see him. Finding her cute, he kisses her on the forehead.

Su-ji admits that he was right about her, and realized that she only ever tried to avoid Park. She finally recognizes that Park is someone’s son and father, making him just another human being like her. Sang-gu pinches her cheeks as a sign of affection, but Su-ji glares at him—no cheek-pinching for her.

Sang-gu notices Se-hee zoning out in front of the office, and sneaks up behind him to scare him. However, Jung-min’s business card (that Se-hee is holding) catches him by surprise, while Se-hee jumps in shock at the sudden noise.

Sang-gu advises Se-hee to talk to her about it since Ji-ho and Jung-min will have to meet a lot if they work together. Se-hee doesn’t know what to tell Ji-ho, or even where to start—but he does know that no matter what he says, she’ll still get hurt.

Confused, Sang-gu clarifies that he was talking about explaining the truth to Jung-min. He thought Se-hee was still hung up on her, while Ji-ho was just a tenant to him because of their contractual relationship.

Sang-gu leaves him alone to his thoughts, and as the gingko leaves fall around him, Se-hee narrates:

“I thought I could meet her again, maybe once in my life. I even thought of what I should do when that happens. ‘How are you? It’s been a while.’ But as soon as I saw you, I realized I was worried about just one person. When did it start? I thought the only things remaining in my life were dry leaves. I thought I would merely spend the rest of my life waiting for those leaves to fall, living quietly alone.”

Se-hee stops by a bookstore, continuing his narration: “I didn’t want to do anything that could decide another person’s life. I thought I would never make someone cry again.”

As he arrives at the apartment complex, the security guard calls after him, with director Yong-seok standing nearby.

In the office, Won-seok types away mindlessly until Bo-mi stops him, berating him for messing up their program because of his ex. Won-seok quickly apologizes for his mistake, but is surprised by how Bo-mi knew about his breakup.

She explains that it’s written on his face (which he takes literally), and tells him to not make it so obvious since it’s not like he’s only been in one relationship. Won-seok says that he has only been in one, to her shock, and she asks if that this is also his first breakup.

Meanwhile, Ho-rang gets off from work, and sees a slew of text messages from Young-hyo, with the last one asking her out to dinner. She texts him back, and soon after, he arrives to pick her up. He asks what she wants to eat, but Ho-rang only wants beer, and he cheerily agrees.

They sit by the river drinking beer, and Ho-rang cuts to the chase: She broke up with her boyfriend of seven years and went to pick up her stuff from their place that day. She waits for the truth to shock him, but instead, he just asks, “Why did you have such little luggage?” Pfft, this guy is so quirky.

Then he supposes that there isn’t that much stuff to get rid of when it comes time to pack, confessing that he also once broke up with his girlfriend of seven years. Ho-rang asks why he broke up, and he explains how they fought about marriage, realizing too late that dating and marrying were two different things.

He asks how she’ll overcome her breakup, and Ho-rang assumes that time will heal all wounds. Young-hyo argues that time just passes by, and instead, he shares something he did to help with his breakup: make wishes aloud to the mirror about what you want.

He begins to chant his different wishes, but she doesn’t understand the words and tells him flatly not to use difficult language with her. Young-hyo shyly admits that they’re slang terms used by teenagers, which finally gets Ho-rang to laugh.

Se-hee meets with Yong-seok, who begins to apologize about that night. He blames alcohol for his actions, and asks that they withdraw the lawsuit since he’s willing to compensate with a cash settlement.

At first, Se-hee looks at him in confusion, but the more he listens, the more he catches on to the truth. Remembering the night Ji-ho came to his apartment in her pajamas, the pieces click together, and Yong-seok belatedly realizes that Se-hee hadn’t known.

Yong-seok excuses himself to leave, but Se-hee grabs his arm, staring menacingly, and orders him to sit down and talk to him instead of Ji-ho.

Ji-ho thanks Jung-min for sharing her story, but Jung-min also has a question for her: What would she have done if Jung-min had said she still loved Se-hee? Ji-ho tells her that they would become enemies, and that she would wait for Se-hee’s heart to come to her.

Jung-min asks if she’d wait because it’s a contract marriage, but Ji-ho replies that even in a real marriage, there’s no guarantee that one spouses will have their partner’s heart. Jung-min disagrees, thinking that marriage is the official declaration of a couple claiming exactly that. Ji-ho admits she’s new to marriage, but she is sure of one thing: Hearts aren’t things to be stolen or grabbed—they can only come to you.

Later as she contemplates Ji-ho’s words, Jung-min flashes back to the day she wrote the farewell Post-its to Se-hee, telling him to never love again. She sighs that she envies Ji-ho for already realizing the truth about love.

Her driver informs Jung-min of complications regarding Ji-ho’s lawsuit. Apparently, Yong-seok got beat up by Ji-ho’s husband when asking for the charges to be dropped, and Jung-min can’t believe that Se-hee did such a thing.

At a company dinner, Park gives a toast, pandering to their boss, and throws in a halfhearted apology to Su-ji. Shocked, Su-ji glares at Park, who waves aside the issue when a coworker asks, calling it nothing. *grabs pitchfork and burning torches*

The group heads out of the restaurant for their second round, but Park needs to stop by the office for something. Su-ji shoots daggers at his back and calls Sang-gu to clarify that those who don’t understand words are not human. She asks if he meant it when he promised to stand by her side once she faces the world, and he confirms it.

With that, Su-ji half-whispers into the phone, “I love you.” She hangs up, and Sang-gu is unsettled enough to leave the office in the middle of a board game to find her.

Wearing a grim face, Su-ji follows Park through the lobby as instances of his sexual harassment come flooding back to her. She steps up next to him at the elevators, and tells him that she has some unfinished business.

The elevators arrive, and unbuttoning her coat, Su-ji calls Park by his first name, making him twirl around. She punches him in the face, which throws him to the ground, and Su-ji glowers at Park as the elevator doors close.

The rest of the employees continue their board game, and as Won-seok starts winning, the others comment on how they’ve raised a tiger (“horangi”). He gets bothered by the word since it sounds like Ho-rang, and suggests going out for drinks. Bo-mi declines since she has a prior engagement, but the other two guys agree to go clubbing.

Once there, though, the music and lights are too much for them. Won-seok ends up dancing alone while the others leave, and onstage, a women pole dances to the crowd’s cheers. Then the pole dancer whips back her hair, revealing her face, and Bo-mi winks at the camera.

She continues to dance and notices Won-seok jumping around on the floor. She pulls him onstage, to his surprise, and tells him to talk with his body as they resume dancing.

Meanwhile, Se-hee bandages his bloody knuckles and remembers Ji-ho’s mom’s request to help when Ji-ho decides to write again. Gathering his resolve, he calls Jung-min, and meets her at her office.

Ji-ho walks home and stops by the same bookstore Se-hee went to earlier. She asks a worker about the same book Se-hee looked at, and the worker informs her that their last copy was sold today.

At the office, Se-hee asks Jung-min if his actions will disadvantage Ji-ho, but Jung-min reassures him that she has it under control. He then asks if him being Ji-ho’s husband will affect her chances of becoming a writer, and Jung-min is slightly upset that he came to meet her after twelve years to only ask about helping Ji-ho.

He apologizes, but explains that there’s nothing he can do to help her achieve her dreams. On the other hand, Jung-min knows how to do it, and all he asks from her is to treat Ji-ho as a writer and not as his wife.

On the bus ride home, Se-hee reads a passage from the book he bought: “Words are born from people’s mouths and die in their ears. But some words don’t die. They go into people’s hearts and survive.”

In his room, Se-hee takes out the poetry book left by Jung-min, and looking over the note again, he thinks, “These words survived in my heart for twelve years. When did they disappear so suddenly like this? I couldn’t get rid of them from my heart no matter how hard I tried then.”

Flashing back to earlier, Jung-min asked if Se-hee ever confessed to Ji-ho. He hadn’t, so she’d informed him that he never confessed to her either. Jung-min gave him the advice that that words can only survive when they reach people’s hearts, and to reach people’s hearts, words have to be said out loud.

Back in his room, Se-hee recalls the different moments Ji-ho expressed her feelings, and realizes that his feelings aren’t coincidental. Ji-ho’s warm words piled up inside of him, and survived in his dead heart.

Se-hee’s father calls Ji-ho to meet, and she mentions resuming her writing career to him. He clearly disapproves, wanting them to have kids instead, and slides a bankbook to Ji-ho to pay off the house loan.

She tells him he should give it to Se-hee directly, but he tells her to act as the bridge between their families. Before getting up to leave, Ji-ho stops him since she has something to say, but we don’t hear the rest of their conversation.

Afterward, Ji-ho hangs out at Su-ji’s place, and they call Ho-rang, who sounds chipper than she did in the morning. Ji-ho brings up her favorite movie, The Graduate, and explains to Su-ji that when she first saw it in high school, she loved the scene where the main character interrupted the wedding.

However, rewatching it in her twenties, Ji-ho noticed the anxious expressions on the leads’ faces at the end, and Su-ji astutely asks if she’s seeing that between her and Se-hee. Holding back her tears, Ji-ho says yes.

Su-ji waits with Ji-ho for a taxi, but Ji-ho tells her to go since Sang-gu called and is waiting for her. Su-ji leaves, and tells Sang-gu about punching Park in the face. He praises her, and Ji-ho watches from a distance as the two kiss and hug, clearly in love.

On the ride home, Ji-ho contemplates why her marriage was so easy, realizing that it was because there was no love. However, now that she’s found love, Ji-ho wonders why she’s getting more hurt.

Se-hee puts the nametag collar Ji-ho bought on Cat while remembering Jung-min’s advice about confessing. Talking to Cat, Se-hee acknowledges that the collar might be awkward but thinks it’s better-looking than he expected.

He waits for Ji-ho outside, and when she arrives, they talk about her day as he tries to hold her hand but fails. Inside the apartment, Cat greets them as usual, and Se-hee tries to act normal as he expectantly waits for Ji-ho to notice the collar.

She doesn’t seem to register the change, and in a deflated voice, she says there’s something she needs to say. He also has something to tell her, and they move to the couch to talk.

Se-hee turns Cat’s collar around to make it more visible, but he soon realizes that a more important matter is at hand when Ji-ho takes a seat on the couch rather than the floor. She tells him to go first, but he can only stammer the first part of his sentence before giving up and letting her go instead.

Pausing between words, Ji-ho tells Se-hee that they should terminate their contract now. Se-hee stares at Ji-ho, his expression unchanging, but in voiceover he says, “Words are always slower than the heart.”

 
COMMENTS

Once again, I’m amazed by the show and how they handle the relationship between Ji-ho and Se-hee. They might be adorable oddballs caught up in a ridiculous situation, but the emotions they feel and the problems they face are neither farcical nor unusual. The potential breakup looming over Ji-ho and Se-hee might have been obvious in some sense, but not for the typical reasons often used in romantic comedies where first loves butt in and cause misunderstandings.

Rather, Jung-min has actually helped strengthen their relationship more than come between them, and instead, the writer has chosen to depict this possible split as a result of Ji-ho coming to terms with reality and realizing the heartache that comes with love. Just like how she viewed her favorite movie with rose-colored glasses—romanticizing the leads’ hasty getaway—in some ways, Ji-ho has fallen in love with Se-hee with no consideration of the repercussions of their relationship. She lives in the moment, which is admirable, but just as she noticed Ben and Elaine’s anxious expressions at the end of The Graduate, she’s starting to see beyond the initial flutters of her first love and experiencing the gamut of emotions, both painful and happy, that inevitably occurs in all relationships.

Though it seems Ji-ho is implying a termination of their marriage alongside the contract, it doesn’t necessarily have to mean that she wants to completely break ties with Se-hee. Part of me still hopes that Ji-ho loves Se-hee and will want to pursue a “real” relationship with him, but that could simply be me thinking idealistically because thoughts of Ji-ho and Se-hee no longer being a couple breaks my heart. While I love them both individually, I love them even more as a pair, and can’t think of a world where Ji-ho and Se-hee aren’t together. (Okay, maybe I can think of a situation where they aren’t together, but rainbows and kitties don’t exist in that twisted reality!)

The theme of this episode was about words and how they can live on in someone’s heart. This was most evident with Se-hee as he lived with Jung-min’s bitter parting words for twelve years, and only recently, he found out that a new set of words had wormed their way into his heart and burrowed a place to stay. He realizes that his newfound feelings aren’t accidental, and it was a lovely to see how Ji-ho’s words affected Se-hee little by little. However, Se-hee hasn’t been as transparent with Ji-ho as she has with him, which is part of the reason why she has no confidence about her place in his heart. She doesn’t understand how much her words have changed him, and as Se-hee narrated at the end of the episode, by the time he realized what was in his heart, his words were too late.

In a different vein, the idea of words and the heart was also displayed in Su-ji’s circumstance with Park. While she acted tough, his remarks and actions lived on in her heart, leaving scars, which was why it was necessary for Su-ji to confront him about his behavior to acknowledge, at least to herself, how much pain he inflicted on her through his words. She took Sang-gu’s advice and sincerely faced the world, though Park trampled on her sincerity in the end. However, this confrontation and resulting disappointment make it clear that Park is intentional in his sexual harassment, and allows Su-ji to accept the fact that he’s not worth her sincerity.

Though I rarely mention it, the directing continues to be wonderful, and there were some particularly pretty scenes this episode. The use of colors, light, and reflections have a narrative purpose, and adds another dimension of nuance to an already brilliant show. With only a week left, it’s time I prepared myself to say goodbye to this drama because I know I’ll need it when next week arrives.

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It’s Thanksgiving and I’d like to thank this drama for existing. Especially you, Swoonhee!!!

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My comment yesterday about "the drama cutting the drama but it made it more dramatic" is actually for this episode. The looming separation can be easily called noble idiocy in other dramas but in this case I can't. Show, I love you!

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Not all heroes wear capes--some wear black turtlenecks instead.

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Both Se-hee and Su-ji were absolutely frightening this episode and I loved it. I got actual chills. And it was hot. I don't know what that says about me.

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Yes, that black turtlenecks!!!!
Suji's outfit, Suji's heels, Suji's red lipstick, everything is just perfect.

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Su-Ji was legit a queen in that moment, so badass and powerful. A woman in charge of her own destiny.

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Absolutely femme fatale!!

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Yaaassss I was thinking the exact same thing. I've been swooning over her since episode 1, just as much as Sang Gu!

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best punch in the history of punches.

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It says your observant. It was completely hot.😍

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Se Hee's burst of emotions when it comes to Ji Ho.. remember he was the man who said "I do not punch people, coz it will cost too much"
But now, I can literally see in his face that his blood boiled down upon knowing what that a**hole director did to JiHo on that night.. I'm teary eyed at that scene..

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Not to mention the choice of background music for that scene (sympathy for lady vengeance's ost) was a touch of genius

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So glad you pointed that out, thank you!

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Is it just me, or have SG, SH and SJ ALL been in black turtlenecks before? I Rmb SH wearing one as he fried the omelette.

My heroes! 😍 plus they look pretty darned good in them, too. Much better than spandex!

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Also, I apologize for having nothing deep to comment at the moment. I have many things to say but with Thanksgiving and all I didn't have time to write anything up! :P When all friends and family have left I shall join the discussion, which will surely be meaty.

I will say this: I don't think Ji-ho means to truly break up when she says they should end the contract. I will explain why later. That would be classic noble idiocy, and this show subverts traditional kdrama conventions.

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I always look forward to your amazing insights dear Mindy! Happy thanksgiving, btw!

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I agree, I'm hoping she wants to terminate the contract but not their budding relationship since she told Jung-min she'd wait for his heart even if she(JM) tried to pursue him. For even if shes not confident of his heart. She understands him enough to know that the steps he's taken towards him are sincere and not something he would do lightly. She's shown herself to be a good judge if character -if you overlook her director crush

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Yeah... That director crush is the only thing I found a bit inconsistent with Ji-ho's character.

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I have this question while watching JM-JH having that deep talk; does JM know about SH-JH's contract?

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In their conversation they did mention the contract. Jung Min said: You will wait for his heart... is it because the marriage is contract-based? ... So it sounds like Jung Min knows.

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I don't think Ji-ho means to truly break up when she says they should end the contract.

I agree. Surely there is a catch. Like lovepark said, Ji-ho wanting to end the contract might mean she just wants their relationship to not be based on it

While re-watching that scene, I noticed that they kind of both phrased their sentences the same way by starting with "이제 우리: can/ shall we..." and maybe it's because the sentence structure in Korean and English are kind of flipped, but in that moment of anticipation where Ji-ho hadn't finished her sentence, I got the feeling that Se-hee almost thought she was about to confess.
I might be also be way off the mark though.

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I also thought that. The way his eyes widen slightly and he seems to hold his breath... He's definitely hopeful, and I swear you can hear his heart break when she finishes her sentence.

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I heard his heart break when he said "words are always slower than the heart". I am so affected by this show.

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I also got that feeling too about Se Hee thinking Ji Ho was going to confess, since Ji Ho does seem to take a lead a lot and Se Hee was definitely in that honeymoon mentality (as much of a honeymoon mentality as someone like Se Hee can be in...)

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I found hope in the preview for next week. I won't go into details cause I know that's spoilers for some, but I think the editing is trying to fool us into thinking the repurcussions of her declaration in this episode are darker than they will be.

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More than anything i think jiho just want a fresh start in their relationships.

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this episode made me really appreciate how sehee didn't follow the trope where the male lead still yearns over his former love kinda thing.
I can't wait for the next episode to hear why jiho wants to terminate the contract. I really hope she'll go for the relationship and doesn't push him away. but I think she'll think that sehee isn't over his room 19, when he is.

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I think its more she doesnt know what he feels about her as hes stated over and over again he wants a life alone. This was reinforced in her mind when she met jungmin hpwho she found oerfectly agreable and didnt understand why se hee would leave her . (Wrong interpretation?)

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Agreed. I think she's afraid of misinterpreting the signs of love that Se-hee has shown since she has done so before to disasterous results with the director. Before she was editing their history in a positive light, but with the reappearance of the ex, her insecurity in their relationship (which is completely understandable) makes her re-edit their history in a negative light. Now she has two versions of their story vying for attention and she has no idea which one is true. She has to step back and reexamine their relationship. And, now I think Se-hee is ready to step up his game and be upfront with her and clarify what she means to him. Hopefully, he won't take too long planning it out!

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ohh thanks for explaining it! I forgot about her past misinterpretation to that director which takes part to make her 're-edit' her thoughts about SH's feeling for her. Like you said, I also hope SH wont take too long to clarify everything! I cant wait to see another cute scene from them, and the kitty~

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Se Hee HAS TO step up his game. In order for the relationship to work, he HAS TO go to her. Ji-Ho, in ending the contract, places the ball squarely in his court. Thus far, the relationship has been propelled by Ji-Ho (not discrediting Se Hee's advances). Ji Ho needs to hear his feelings in order for her to continue moving forward. Sometimes grand gestures are required.

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A couple of episodes ago, I was saying that I hope she won't be ignorant of how Se Hee feels, but it's true, he has not committed himself in words, so it's tough to interpret the actions.

I can say though that any girl, if she gets from any man, the kind of attention Se Hee gives Ji Ho, can be confident he is definitely interested in her. The question will then be, interested to what end? 😉

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well said!
sure, he's interested. that's clear. but, as you said, "To what end?"
from Ji- Ho's POV, she takes her happiness with their budding closeness one moment at a time, but when you're in love, it's never enough. You always want to know where you stand for suuuuure, and the poor girl hasn't gotten that.
yet.
Se-Hee, how I wish that you had spoken 1st!!!

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Especially if when JM mentioned in the end Se Hee never said he "liked" her. So it seems like a habit he's kept, expecting his actions to be enough to conveyed his thoughts to his partner.

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Maybe she wants to end their contract marriage... and start a real one with Se-hee 😉.

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Since Ji Ho is not sure how Se Hee truly feels and then his ex came along and then his father-in-law is paying for the house mortgage, she feels Se Hee does not need her anymore in his life. If only Se Hee said what he truly feels...

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Nooooo See Hee gets heartbroken for a second time :(
And YASS Su-Ji is so badass! That was a long overdue punch.

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That sleazy guy deserved it, ugh. She asked him to apologize sincerely and he treated it as another joke.

Though in an actual real life scenario I shudder to think of the consequences... :/ he deserved it, but SJ mentioned she really needs this job for the very high pay it gives her. (Is he her superior, can he get her sacked?)

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Maybe but she can sue for sexual harassment. That douche has been at it for 3 years. I'd hate to think how he treats women that haven't even reached Su-ji position.

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I don't think he will because then he would have to explain that he got punched in the face by Su-Ji for constantly sexually harassing her.

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Also he'd have to admit that he got punched by a woman. No, he got floored by a woman. And, I may be mistaken about this, but it seemed like SJ was making sure she was out of sight of the cameras that seem to be everywhere.

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May be Su Ji is consciously thinking of starting her made-to-order bra business. So she won't care whether her job will be jeopodized by punching her superior.

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I was really surprised he punched the scumbag, and I wanted to see it, but on the other hand... i cannot imagine Seehe beating anybody...
Somehow also a proof that he is totally in love with her. I am swooning already in the expectation of his confession, although i am dreading it will happen finally in Ep. 16... :(

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See, that's what I don't get about this drama. In terms of character development, Sehee has been constantly trying to understand Jiho and her point of view. However, I have yet to see Jiho try to undertstand his heart. The writing is trying to say that the problem is that she is in love with him and he isn't with her - what I saw is that she never loved him as much as he did her. Like, when did she ever sacrifice anything on his behalf? eh? It really seems like Jiho has been using Sehee the whole drama, from the first kiss to the one-sided breakup initiation.

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too soon to tell my friend. wait for the surprises.

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Actually, I think Jiho tries to understand Sehee to the best of her ability! His character is a bit stiff and closed off and remember, she has no idea what's in Sehee's heart! While being swept away by her own feelings for Sehee, she does her best to give him the space that he wants. If you think back to the previous episodes of Jiho on cloud nine, Sehee is awkward and uncomfortable and because of those actions, Jiho has been trying to keep those boundaries that Sehee constantly reminds her of. We see Sehee take notice of Jiho's feelings only because she is more transparent about her emotions than he is about his towards her. I also don't think the writers are trying to blame the lack of communication and this current situation (ending the contract?) on either of the mcs. They're trying to portray that when it comes to love, often times, the lack of verbal confirmation is the problem and cause of mishap.

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That punch was one of the best things in this episode! And the beating that Se-hee gave the Yong-seok off screen. I wish they will show it to us in the next ep.
I simply loved it when Se-hee grabbed his arm as the coward was trying to get away, and ordered him to sit down, talk to him and not Ji-ho, and warned him that he'd better be telling the truth! I love this man!!!

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Yeah that scene was touching..

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I loved the terrified expression on the jerk PD's face when Se-hee grabbed his arm and stood up, practically towering over him. SO satisfying to watch. His attempted sexual assault on Ji-ho was all about power, and it was awesome to see him practically cower in fear and get his just desserts. Not the big man you thought you were, huh, douche-bag? How does it feel? I need to see the thrashing he got, too.

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what i love about this drama is how it shows that love is expressed in many different ways. Se Hee puts aside his discomfort and goes to Jung Min to speak on Ji Ho's behalf. Sang Gu tells it like it is to Soo Ji even though her temper scares him a little and he seems the type to not like confrontation. Even Ho Range and Won Seok in their own way are loving by letting go. i think it's what lasting relationships are built on. Giving what is needed and not necessarily big on romantic gestures. Sigh! How swoony!

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Same! I love how every couple is so different, and they all express their love so differently. It’s heartwarming to see. And what’s best is that Jung-min and Se-hee seemed to have moved on and become mature, stable individuals and they’re willing to let the past be the past. I kind of like JM more and more each episode.

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YASSS i love that jungmin and sehee both aren't really hindered. They were definitely SHOCKED don't get me wrong, and jungmin may have liked sehee but she understands that time has moved on and she doesn't regret her choice to break up with him. makes me respect seeing couples who actually are rational.

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I'm glad this show let them move on. I mean, it's been 12 years. And I would hate the idea of such a cool woman pining over some guy for that long and also expecting him to be free after all that time.

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Se Hee puts aside his discomfort and goes to Jung Min to speak on Ji Ho's behalf

Why is it that everything he does makes my heart melt? >.<
Considering their history and that he probably hadn't completely wrapped his head around the fact that his ex is back in his life, and that he was probably still pretty angry after beating up that jerk PD and learning the truth.... him seeking out Jung-min was truly selfless and a beautiful gesture on his behalf. I'm sure Ji-ho would be appalled in a good way, if she found out about it.
I also just love that this episode was Se-hee having a mini epiphany about the depth of his feeling for Ji-ho.💖

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Se-hee meeting with Yong-seok and taking charge was so cool to watch. Se-hee is definitely into Ji-Ho especially if he is literally fighting for her.

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he's sooo cool, those eyes can kill for sure

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like wonseok said before : i didn't know eyes can spit lol

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I'm thankful that I'm able to trust the writer (Especially since I'm not the type to actively make theories about what happened/happens next in a k-drama). Thank you for writing this drama and for coming into our lives!

<3

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I would totally mail flowers to the Writers right now!

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I really hope to see a battered assistant director next week. Protective Se-Hee is the best kind of Se-Hee, I also hope the angst doesn't stretch for too long but this writer knows what she's doing so I place my heart in her hands. ALSO YES SU-JI I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR YOU TO SUCKER PUNCH THAT BOI

I can't believe this drama is ending next week... what am I going to do with this void and crack in my heart. THIS SHOW IS MY ROOM 19

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Also, I was hoping that dad was just some old misunderstood puppy but this episode showed why Se-Hee is so hostile towards him. Old man, don't force Ji-Ho to make babies for you when you can barely communicate with the only child you have.

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I hated how he tried to make Ji Ho responsible for being the bridge. Again with men expecting women to bear all the emotional labor!

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One thing they made very clear in this episode is how much Soo Ji is Se Hee, Sang Gu is Ji Ho... Ho Rang and Won Seok are emotionally younger versions of the other characters... you could almost see how Jung Min is a more mature version of Ji Ho and Soo Ji. It's so -- everyone is more alike than they are different.

The other thing in this episode is that I felt so bad for Jung Min... Se Hee gives her N-O-T-H-I-N-G... we don't know what happened back then but I feel it's a lot of 'not talking'. Se Hee was probably too young and immature to deal with her emotions about the miscarriage, she might have been too hurt to 'talk' and his parents probably crapped on her... so I can see why she might have left bitter and angry, but like she said those are memories and I felt she was looking for something from him even if it is just closure, but Ji Ho has taken him to the point where what happened is now a memory for him.

Just brutal!

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But if he had wanted to rehash the past I think it would have felt like a betrayal to Ji-ho, maybe if Ji-ho knew his history it wouldn't feel that way. It looks like she was the one who walked away cutting off communication between them. I really don't know what he could have said without her showing some sign that broaching that topic would be acceptable to her

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I agree! It's totally out of respect for his relationship with Ji-ho that he won't talk with Jung-min in a close way.

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There's a part of me that really wants to see what happened between Se-Hee and Jung Min. Another part of me asks, "Do the details really matter?" I don't know if they do. We know they were young, his family disapproved, and they experienced a tragic loss. In some regards, that's enough. Especially, this late in the show when we're supposed to be winding down. I particularly don't want to walk down memory lane and potentially feel a tinge for a relationship that won't happen. Let bygones stay bygones?

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I agree wholeheartedly with the thing about JM. They definitely need closure, although I guess JH has mostly healed SH's issues. But I think that since they've all gotten to the start of talking honestly, maybe JM will end up being someone they can both confide in, and she and SH can finally have that conversation about their past. Side note, I think JM and JH's hidden conversation may have revealed more about the family issues, and that might've affected what JH to her 'father in law'.

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We've had little hints about the break up trought last episodes. They suddenly moved together from campus to an apartment and nobody knew about them what was going on. She was pregnant and not married ( Se Hee had prepared the marriage papers but to register it he was too late, he doesn't express himself with words easily, I don't blame him - he got cut off with his dad permanently.) It was quite difficult situation they were both in and Se Hee tried to do what's right at the moment ("Let me talk to my parents...") but dealing with miscarriage is very very hard especially when you accepted that there is a little grain growing with you and then there is no sound of heart beat when you do the sonography. There is a big crush in your inner space and you need a place for yourself to cry out your grief with deep sorry spilling out of your mouth and you close yourself to others to move on. She didn't hear the words of love you from Se Hee at that moment and she needed to blame somebody. Jung Min got this wonderful poetry book as a good bye present with a crucial message to her love and left probably wanting to be stopped, to be proved she was loved. It didn't happen this way and the time passed. She wasn't the only one to be hurt (there is this quote "Sometimes it's better to be alone NOBODY can hurt you") but after 12 years there is Ji Hoo who starts little by little heal the wounds Jung Min left and Se Hee observes, tries to not hurt the one who reached his sorrows.

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Oh there are so many quotes which came out when I googled hurt and it goes so well with Se Hee - Jung Min - Ji Hoo:

"You hurt me more than what I deserve because I loved you more than what you deserve."

"Nothing hurts more than being disapointed by the single person you thought would never hurt you."

"A real man can't stand his woman hurt. He's careful with his decisions and actions, so he has to be responsible for her pain."

"80% of women use silence to express pain. You know she's truly heart when she choose to ignore you."

"People will usually hurt you in attempt to heal themselves."

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Is it bad if I really ship WS and BM now that they've met at the club? They seem much more compatible for each other, they're both brainy nerds plus BM seems to be interested in him. The only issue is that I can't seem to ship HR with the other guy, she seems a little shocked by his odd sense of humour, LOL.

The nerve of that PD to look for Ji-ho's husband. What, did he think that by speaking to the husband, the husband could convince JH to drop the charges? It's not the husband's burden to bear - he wasn't the victim, and he doesn't have say over JH. The fantastic thing about SH is that he treats JH as an independent individual, (Yes, probably because they're in a fake marriage, but also because he's a good person that way) not as someone he can control simply because they're married. Ugh, PD.

SE-HEE, WHY? I KNEW he was going to let her speak first, and she was going to call it off! He should have confessed first! (Unless she was going along the lines of confessing first herself, then I'm all for it, but... she looked too serious for it to be any good news...)

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I knew writer Nim wouldn't let him have his confession in that scene but when JH told him to speak first I was happy and surprised but sigh

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I believe the PD was looking for Ji-ho, not Se-hee. He said that he didn't know she got married. He knew where she lived but not who she lived with. He just had the good luck that Se-hee came home first instead of Ji-ho. 😜

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It's already been established that the PD is a pathetic excuse of a human being, and I know I shouldn't expect anything good from him... BUT goodness gracious, the audacity!
When he said that he didn't "remember much" from that night, that technically means he could have raped her for all he knows!
UGH, this is fiction... but I was SO angry, even more so because people like him actually exist.

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> The nerve of that PD to look for Ji-ho's husband
I agree with that, but also felt that it was super in character for that awful man - proves that he really has no respect for women.

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For BM and WS and HR and the other guy. I sort of ship HR with the other guy since the other guy's good humor and positive attitude balances out HR's dramatics, and they're both looking for marriage.

For BM and WS - i can't stop thinking about WS's bad dancing...*cringe*

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Letting her speak first or having her trying to break the contract just as he is full in are such tropes that I have to wonder if a writer that has taken such pleasure in subverting certain tropes would go this route.

If I had written this (and I could not) and got to this point, I would have to go a different route here... either

A. Se Hee let's Ji Ho talk and agrees to everything and then at the end confesses he's in love with her anyway. Remember Soo Ji and See Hee are on parallel emotional paths... and she just confessed.

Or

B. Ji Ho wants to break the contract because she has a better job and want to renegotiate for payment terms to pay off "THEIR" apartment faster... it has nothing to do with their relationship.

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You and I are on the same wavelength; I believe the same. She is deeply in love with him and would give him her whole paycheck to pay off that house!

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I've been shipping WS and BM since the RCI (rubik's cube incident)

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I am curious about what Se hee father told Ji ho, since whatever it is, it clearly make Ji ho's mood worse

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I know. Her spine stiffened when he seemed to dismiss her and she insisted on saying something, which I guess we'll find out next week. I have a high suspicion she stood up for Se-Hee, as the awesome chick that she is!
Go, Ji-Ho !

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i do believe what she said and what the father said afterward could have been reason for Jihoo to break their contract. cause i didn't see any noble idiocy here, since JH herself already told JM she will fight for him. it was after she met the father she suddenly changed. when she talked to SJ in her room, she didn't cry but her eyes reddened ( kudos to Jung So Min to pull that kind of acting where you don't really need to cry just to show thay you are really in pain. my heart ached a little bit during that scene). i really believe it was something what the father said.

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Agree. I think she stood up for See Hee, for herself and perhaps for Jung Min too. It’s about time the issue with the dad be resolved. I still put up hope that there’s still a twist and the dad isn’t been portrayed all black, and would be given a rounder characteristic than a typical hateful dad. But I might be wrong too. I just don’t know anymore with this writer LOL but one can hope right?

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I don't think dad is the villain he seems to be. He brought up many topics that are realities for normal married couples. JiHo and SeHee have discussed NONE of those things, nor have they discussed how they feel about each other or his complicated past. These things couldn't have remained lost on JiHo forever.

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Se-Hee's dad is not a "villain", but he sure is a forceful father...

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As i said before, i can honestly see the show ending with them breaking up as a married couple and then dating slowly all over again. (Which would be such a pity because itd feel like all the progress they made wouldve gone down the drain, but at this point i trust the author and i trust the ending will be good. Please be!)

I also never realized that ji ho cried at the wedding due to her inability to go back to work (from the incident). I just figured she was crying because she felt guilty towards her mother. Ah, this heroin is really something special. At first, i didnt understand her when she felt she didnt know her place in se hee's life, but looking back at it, she's absolutely right. He has never been clear. And has insisted that he wanted to be alone... then again he only did realize his feelings later on.

PLEASE guys, talk this through asap so we can get more sweet scenes between you two !

Wondering how itll end with the third couple as well. They seem kinda well paired with their two new respective partners... but they do need closure. And they definitely still love each other.

Side note: How did ceo Ma become one of my favorite characters??
Did anyone notice the mistake in continuity in the beginning to the series when se hee asked his work place comrads who thought he was gay or asexual, ceo ma raised his hand? Ill let this one slide writer nim.

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After a 12 year dry spell you never know

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Same here! I've been wondering why he said that he's asexual when he actually knew SH's past!

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CEO Ma was kinda correct because he knew Se-hee vowed to never be with anyone ever again because of his horrid past. The correct terminology is probably self-evoked celibacy and not asexual (though I think Se-hee was living life thinking he would never want/need intimacy until Ji-ho came along) but they often get mixed up or treated as synonyms.

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I agree totally... I even know people who are married, but don´t have sex out of different reasons, and they consider themselves to be asexual. They don´t like the other sex, but they don´t like their same sex. It is like... they simply don´t like sex at all... But hey! They are relative normal people. They have pets and hobbies and help others... So... Yeah, I would say CEO Ma got to believe more or less that See he became someone like that...

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As a male -- when two male friends decide 'not' to talk about something... it doesn't exist.

Remember -- the asexual thing is a public thing at their job... it involves their co-workers perspective on See Hee. As his friend in this situation, you absolutely say asexual and not bring up ANYTHING that would suggest the thing you're not supposed to talk about.

I mean, it appears to me that no one at their job knows that Mr. Ma and Se Hee have been friends for a very long time. I wonder why their not partners rather than employer and employee.

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MONDAYS WONT BE THE SAME WITHOUT THIS DRAMA. THIS SHOW IS MY LIFE SOURCE.

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same for me and it is going to be hard to say goodbye to such a good drama like this one :(

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How is it that Se-Hee's thoughtful sighs and soft exhalations are so eloquent?

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Testament to Lee Min Ki's acting. I mean he's been gone for 2 years in movies and 10 years in Kdrama industry but he still manage to nail Sehee's character.

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This whole drama is so eloquent and poetic! I love how they use the different quotes and weave them into the plot.

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It’s through this drama that I realised how satisfying it is to have a character that was written well and acted well. His facial expressions are remarkably satisfying to watch and I couldn’t see anyone else plays Se Hee like he did.

I enjoy Jung So Min’s portrayal too. Sbe exudes warmth and sincerity, and even if the character is portrayed as being upset or immature sometimes, you just can’t hate her.

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Yes, that warmth is so lovely.

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I loved your recap and thoughts on the show. I love so much about this drama and this episode in particular but don't have to much to say except I feel anxious as I wait (mostly) confident for the ending. I l know what I want but this show has been one surprise after another and all bets are off. Here's hoping for the best resolution for all our new found friends.

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I thought I didn't have much to say and then I comment on just about everything mentioned here. Lol.

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Some of my favs from this episode :
-The punching of Sooji's coworker (Sooji's all black outfit, heels, and lipstick!)
-SH grabbing that trash human being (the death glare, the hand grabbing!!)
-Ceo Ma throws leaves while singing (cute! cute!)

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OH.. and also these:
-the Glam's employee playing monopoly
-BM dancing in da club!

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I LOOOOOOOVE everything about this drama. That’s it.

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The last scene really stayed with me for some reason. Seeing Se-hee with hearts in his eyes and Ji-ho beginning to detach embodies how messy relationships are, and how much of a miracle it is for two people to love each other at the same time; to essentially be at the same stage. It felt so utterly real and poignant.

and the fact that there hearts were on two sides of the spectrum, with Se-hee having hearts in his eyes and Ji-hoo appearing

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I usually get scared when a drama gets to the angst part. A good drama is usually ruined by how it handles the looming sadness or separation. But this, Because This Is My First Life handles it perfectly. It has the mellow feel to it but not so dramatic to the point that it feels out place with the original tone of the drama. Not to mention how civil Ji-ho and Jung-min, and Se-hee and Jung-min's "confrontations" were.

On the other hand, I'm confident that the show will go the regular route of contract marriage dramas where the couple will break up but will eventually find each other again after a time jump. I believe they'll stay together and work this out.

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What I meant to say was the show will NOT go through the usual route. The drama has always done a refreshing take on drama tropes so I do believe they'll work this out.

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LOL I read your last sentence like twice because I thought... "Am I reading well?"...
And I hope, i hope ( I HOPE -in caps) that you are right and they won´t be apart and come back together in the last minute... Please no... It would ruin the pace and the flow of the story. :(

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While the show deeply rewarding on every freaking level, can I just say how much I love the lush OST? My eyes are moist just thinking about it.

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This OST is my favorite. No "You arrrrrre my DESTINY" being blared every time the OTP gets together.

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OMG, YES!!! The OST does what it is supposed to do...enhance, not detract...and not be an annoyance.

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I was literally watching the last 10 minutes of this episode with half closed eyes I was literally dreading the end.

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That being said I still love this show because of its realistic portrayal of self doubt and unsureness

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So heart wrenching. I dearly hope the termination of their contract means the end of their purely landlord-tenant relationship and that Ji-ho actually wants to pursue a real husband-wife relationship and register their marriage officially, etc. I hope. I hope I hope I hope.

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Yes, I'm counting on it, just for the sake of surviving the days until the next episode!

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the fact when ji ho started to sit on the couch, it broke my heart

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she always feels uncomfortable on the couch, at that moment i knew she'll say something that will break my heart and sehee's!

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Not just on the couch, but the very far end of the couch

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I think it’s a testament of how uncomfortable she was with their situation then.

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I really do love the directing in this as well. I’m going to have to remember this director in the future. And when Se-Hee FINALLY articulates to us how his heart had been infiltrated by Ji-Ho’s warm words—I swooned so hard!

I kind of like Ho-Rang’s new guy. Sounds like his experience mirrors hers and even if they don’t hit it off, he likely has some good advice for her.

And Su-Ji! The balls that girl has is more than most men I know!

ONE. MORE. WEEK. Gah!

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I think it ties in really well with Ji Ho being a scriptwriter. Words are her expertise. She really is a good scriptwriter when her words managed to infiltrate people’s heart like it did to Se Hee. And perhaps seeing how important words are to Ji Ho (also through many scenes where she expressed what she feels very clearly), it brings home the reason why it is so important for Se Hee to express how he feels in words.

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I like her new guy too... I feel that he is someone that was a lot like Ho Rang when she was younger but kept his personality through the maturing process. I think he's the kind of guy that would show Ho Rang that she can wear the red coat even if she's doing all the black coat stuff.

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i love this show for its poignancy and intimacy with raw emotion, but idk is it just me or are these monologues and overvoiced narrations with lyrical metaphors to life getting a little too much?

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It's perhaps a little overused now, but since that's the only noticeable flaw of the show's in recent episodes I've noticed, too--then I'm really not unhappy. :)

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It's similar to Goblin, but I like it better in this show for some reason.

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Is that why I like this show so much? I guess it is. The internal monologues in Goblin were amazing. Is this better? I have to think about that.

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I only started noticing it in this episode, probably because it was probably the least comedic episode to date? I wonder if it's because we're at that point in the story where the conflict progresses and things get more serious.

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that could be it i guess. But it almost seemed pretentious as though the show was trying to keep up with the poignant image it has created for itself. And it makes a smart girl like Ji Ho seem slow and lost, which annoys me a little

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Very cool that Jungmin tells Sehee to confess to Jiho. They're all adults, they tell the truth and don't hold grudges. Contrast that to the usual second lead who says, he's mine because I liked him first. 🤮

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It almost seems like a second heartbreak for Jongmin, but she's a cool enough person to do what needs to be done.

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Me and Young-hyo were on the same page with the belongings.

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That was the funniest bit in the episode! When she brought out that luggage, I was like "here we go again. The kdrama ladies with one piece of carry-on size luggage. That doesn't make sense for a climate with 4 distinct seasons," Undies, bras, and socks alone would take up half the luggage.

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Not to mention, I've seen her wear at least 3 different coats. Lol.

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I loooooved that! It was so self-aware! That is one of the things that kills me in kdramas. They never wear the same jacket twice, yet their suitcases wouldn't fit more than three of those jackets, tops, nevermind the rest of their earthly possessions! Even when Ji Ho moved out of her brothers...I told myself she went back for more stuff. LOL!

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**in defense of ji ho — in response to criticisms of her decision at the end of the episode that i’ve seen elsewhere**

the whole time we were getting SH’s narration in ep 14 i was thinking, “oh, what a lovely internal monologue that JH can’t hear [but should]!”

i understand why people are upset with JH telling SH she wants to terminate the contract just as he was about to confess. but i don’t think we should be too rash to impose judgment upon her for being stupid/too rash/etc.

we have to remember that she didn’t tell him she saw the post-it in the poetry book in ep 11/12. she wasn’t privy to SG and SJ’s dinner conversation about her and SH back then, either. so she’s formed her view on what he thinks of her based on his past words and actions, and more imminently, the revelation that JM’s story of her almost-marriage was about him. she believes that his one love in life is “over,” and is unaware of how meaningful all the things he’s done for her are, given his past experiences and principles. she barely even registered him waiting for her to get home so impatiently [so many missed calls!], or the significance of him making her honey tea to prevent a hangover. i also suspect she hasn’t talked to him outright about finding out that JM = his ex, because she thinks it’s too sensitive/traumatic a subject for the two of them to address [this also mirrors SH saying to SG that no matter how he frames the revelation, JH will get hurt].

so as much as it sucks for both of them emotionally, i’m glad she told him she wants to stop the contract before he was able to confess at the end of this episode. as good as they are at talking to each other, there are still some major communication issues between them — the recurring confessional phone calls are maybe the best example of this [if they were really comfortable, they wouldn’t need to call but disclose those things face-to-face]. as JH put so beautifully in their conversation by the sea, it’s nobody’s fault; things just happened the way they did. the two of them are flawed because that’s who they are.

now that they’ve found out indirectly about each other’s room 19s, they need to address it openly with each other instead of trying to sort through it on their own for fear of hurting the other person. i think they’ll get there soon — if they can be so upfront about the terms of their contract marriage, it’s not a big reach for them to be able to do this too, especially given where they both are now with regards to recognizing their feelings for each other.

so excited for ep 15.

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finally I get clearer explanation on why Ji Ho think it's enough and that she can't take on more pain.
She thinks Se Hee still on his plan, living life alone and that having love once is enough for him. So, to wait for things that have no certainty like that can only giving her pain. I feel you, Ji Ho.

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I second this. And a lot of major stress factors came in less than 2 days : JH finding out abt SH and JM past, and SH aboji pressuring her to get pregnant and leave her job. Sigh.

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i think things are about to get complicated...Wow but when Jung min talked about the miscarriage and all i felt really bad for her...if I was Ji Ho I sure would have different thoughts.

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i think things are about to get complicated...Wow but when Jung min talked about the miscarriage and all i felt really bad for her...if I was Ji Ho I sure would have different conflicting thoughts about who I really like.

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Last time, I mentioned how the dialogue in this show (and just the show in general) is so good it actually hurts.
And boy, oh boy did this episode hurt.
It was just so painfully real, even more so than recently. It reminded me of the earlier episodes, and how this writer is not afraid to consistently sucker-punch the audience.
I must be a little sadistic though, because even as it wrung my heart out and stomped on it for good measure, I still loved it.

First off, that ending. I was initially tormented that it suddenly took such a turn, because I felt that after Se-hee and Ji-ho had so many deep moments together, we should be well on our way of them FINALLY being together. But then I realized that there are still unspoken words between them, and that confronting it needed to happen in some shape or form.
At this point, they do have feelings for each other, but that doesn’t change the fact that their marriage is fake. They need to face whether they want to make it a real one. This is where I feel that Se-hee is still one step behind. I don't doubt his feelings, but I think he should have thought of telling Ji-ho about his past before confessing. I think that even though she knows, she also wanted to hear it from Se-hee himself. But she would never force him to do such a thing, and the fact that he is keeping mum about Jung-min makes her question the seriousness of his feelings. I'm sure she understands that it must not be an easy thing for him to bring up, but she is also someone who needs words of assurance. More than just a confession of his love, I think what she needs is to know that his love for her won't waver.

And about Se-hee…Every insight we get from him always tugs at my heart. I feel so much for him, the way he was living his life until recently. This man who got hurt so much and never expected to love or be loved again. I teared up when he said, “I thought the rest of my life would be the time I would spend by myself.” He had literally resigned himself to die alone, and that is so profoundly sad. But it makes the fact that he found his Ji Ho-ssi, who revived his dead heart even more beautiful. TT_TT

Things that pierced my heart aside, this episode was also full of extremely rewarding moments that we had all been waiting for. From that despicable PD getting his comeuppance through the reappearance of Se-hee the “Sangnamja”…. Gosh, was that SEXY. And the way LMK portrayed it? When the realization hit Se-hee, I could literally hear his heart stop, it was as if his worst fear had become true. And every time he spoke of it, his voice broke.
I can’t talk of badassery without mentioning Suji punching her sleazy co-worker in style and elegance (I was literally cheering); and discovering Bo-mi’s secret identity (OMG!! LMAO). Just WOW, I was gobbling up these payoffs.

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(Cont.)
I have to say though, the most satisfying thing of all was how “Jung-min THE ex” was handled. Her and Ji-ho talked. They were rational. They were understanding of each other, and they resolved it like mature women. It is beautiful and empowering to see women NOT treat each other as enemies, but offering support instead. And I have to hand it to this writer, this show has amazing female characters who are unapologetic of who they are. Writer-nim, you deserve a standing ovation.

Lastly, can I just add that I fell in love with Jung-min?!
She's independent, cool, graceful, empathetic, strong-willed, and the epitome of elegance. She's the sort of person every girl would aspire to be, or be friends with. Such a nuanced performance from Lee Chung-ah, but also extremely well-written and I think very central to the show. She adds a certain quality of mysteriousness to it. And I think she might be the only second lead and former love interest that I can say for sure I LOVE.

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yes Jung Min is so charming and mature. I couldn't imagine myself to behave like her, knowing painful past that she's experienced. I guess she takes it very gracefully now. She had to encounter with her ex and his wife, but still managed to be very empathetic towards them. It's just so hard to do, and kudos for her to still be composed.

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Jung Min is my hero. She kept me thinking of how I would behave if I’ve met my ex (with his wife) again - I haven’t met him for 14 years and we parted ways in a very awkward terms. Now I sincerely hope that I would put the past behind and be a Jung Min if we ever cross paths again.

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Thank your for your cool insights. Lee Minki's trembling voice in the voice-overs just killed me....

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One thing I love is how this show has shown both women supporting other women as well as women contributing to other women's suffering, such as Su-ji's coworkers talking about her not wearing a bra and suggesting she slept around to get to her position, as well as Ji-ho's head writer who tried to convince Ji-ho to continue working with her assaulter. Because, sadly, this happens. Men are not the only ones who can be misogynistic. Internalized misogyny is a huge problem that needs to be addressed and overcome.

This drama also shows that it's not only women that should be feminist and support other women. It's super important for women to have friends like Ji-ho, Su-ji, and Ho-rang and bosses like Jung-min, but it's also important for men to be supportive of the women around them. That's exactly what Se-hee and Sang-gu are doing.

This drama is doing a great job at both addressing these complex issues and providing hope for the future. They're not just saying "Society sucks and nothing can be done about it" (which some shows do and it's depressing), they're saying, "Hey, women do face these issues, but we can all work to move forward and make progress".

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Really late to these recaps, but I wanted to say I'm totally with you. Jung-min is one of the—no, possibly the most amazing female side character I've seen in a K-drama.

The writer does a great job of balancing her emotional struggles and scars with her growth. I can't say that she reminded Sehee that he never confessed to her for purely altruistic motives, that is to make sure he doesn't repeat his mistake with Jiho. The rebuke in her words "You know. You never told me you liked me" was clear, as was her lingering hurt in how she couldn't bring herself to say "Have you told her you love her" and could only settle for "Have you told her you like her... or something along those lines?"

I don't think she's hoping for them to be able to fall in love again, but it's not wrong of her to hope for Sehee to say something more to bring them proper closure. In that air of mystery around Jungmin that you mentioned, @yuyuu, there's a strong sense of hidden pain, and comes from that missing piece of her story that we haven't been shown. For someone as kind as her to leave such cold parting words to Sehee suggests she was hurt very, very badly.

And yet for how much she was hurt, she reacted differently to Sehee. Maybe she never loved another person the way she loved him again, but she had the strength and grace to turn her own suffering into a driving force to help others, as we see in how she refuses to take advantage of Jiho's newbie writer status.

Because she knew what it was like to be young and poor and helpless and emotionally broken, now that she's in a position of power she never wants another person to go through what she did. Whereas Tom gave a complex reading of her raised arms below, I read that more literally: Jiho described a protective vibe from Jungmin and likened her to a tree, and the way she had her arms raised and the apt setting that included tall skinny trees reinforced this image. She has grown from a weak sapling into a strong tree, and she can now provide shelter for other saplings, like Jiho. It's a very powerful metaphor.

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This time Se Hee being considerate just backfired on him when he hesitated and let Ji Ho speak first. He missed an opportunity to explain to Ji Ho how he really feels. Poor Se Hee... But I trust writer-nim that he/she will give us a satisfying ending to this wonderful drama. The last 14 episodes were just perfect. I'm not sure how I'll survive a drama slump after BTIOL. I'll just probably rewatch all 16 episodes.

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I think the true villains in this drama, if there iare any, are the interfering parents in law. Sae Hee should have realized that parental pressure would not stop at marriage, but would continue on. Since Sae Hee isn’t a pliable target, their focus is now on Ji Ho and how to make her do what they want, which reeks to me as all kinds of unethical.

It stinks when parents in law puts pressure on their children’s spouses to make them do what they want or what they think is best. Knowing it would be harder for the spouse to refuse since they’re not blood related and the relationship is so new; they will bend over backwards to please.

Ji Ho should let Sae Hee know right away that she spoke to his father and what his demands are. Right now, it’s “give up your career and have kids”. Tomorrow it will very likely be something else.

News flash to the dad, women have been married, working and and having babies from time immemorial and it ain’t gonna change any time soon. Ji Ho CAN write, have her babies and be happily married. All she needs is support from her husband, which he’s perfectly willing to do; and her mother is willing to help out as well. Sae Hee’s dad should just butt out. Gotta give credit to Ji ho’s mom. She called it! And her fears for her daughter were spot on accurate.

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Ji Ho CAN write, have her babies and be happily married.
THIS!
The scene with SH's dad is what made my heart ache more than the last scene of ep.14. Then, when she almost cried when she's with SuJi, I almost cried too. I felt for her, she's having tiring day like I want to hug her right away. I knew she could handle it with 'her way' without asking opinion from others. She's capable to overcome anything, hence I've been rooting for her since ep.1. But I totally agree with you that she should talk about it with Se Hee. heck, they should talk every thing about their past before anything can cause bigger misunderstanding(?) between them.
(Dear, writer nim, we trust you! please make a good closure for our fav characters!)

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Agree so much about the in-laws. Ji Ho's mom definitely got great foresight and I'm glad she got Se Hee to promise not to stand in the way of Ji Ho's writing dreams.

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I love the misunderstanding between Sang-gu and Se-hee this eps. It's telling from the way Sang-gu changed the way he called Ji-ho, from sister-in-law to a more neutral Ji-ho-ssi, what he thought about Se-hee and Ji-ho's relationship so far. Of course he naturally assumed that Se-hee was worried about what he would tell Jung-min regarding his marriage contract, yet the only person that actually occupied his mind was Ji-ho. And it's definitely an "aha" moment for Se-hee to consciously realized that Jung-min is just a part of his past now, and that he may very well already love Ji-ho as a man, maybe even as her husband.

Se-hee's musing about how he has imagined he would met Jung-min one more time and planned what he would say to her felt so very real. How many times did I think about the exact same thing for certain important people in my life? Though the truth is, when you do meet them, those feelings that you thought you feel so deeply (whether it's anger, longing, sadness, guilt, or regret) actually already faded out by time, replaced by new people we cared about now. That we were just haven't made the leap necessary to recognize it yet. Emotional scars do heal, and most times we just need to face them to understand that the pain has faded already, leaving only a precious lesson for us from a certain past.

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Attagirl! Su Ji you rock!👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾. That punch was way overdue. Wished it had happened sooner. And she looked like an avenging goddess in her black, turtleneck pant suit. Very hot.

I’m liking that the drama is giving us possible alternate partners for Ho rang and Won Seok; proving that they CAN move on with more compatible people.

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Yes, I can't wait to see the aftermath of that punch! Will he apologize sincerely now? How will he explain his black eye or whatever to his wife & co-workers?

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I don't think Wonseok and Bomi really match. I like Bomi as a character, but I don't think it's appropriate for them to have a fling because a. she is his boss and b. he has low self-esteem and was already somewhat fearful of her.

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Maybe....his type seems to be a dominating woman like Ho rang and Bomi. He was comfortable letting Ho rang be in charge of their entire relationship until the marriage alarm clock went off. I could see that partner dynamic happening again with Bomi if marriage is off the table. He would go back to his dumb app and she would crack the whip in bed at night. I think Bomi likes the power of keeping her men unsettled.

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Noooo, I want them to be happy no matter what. Love is painful but healing at the same time. Please you two be happy!

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ah and i have to mention I love quote by the new guy Horang just met, "Time doesn't heal, it's just passing." Damnnnn you're rite boi!!

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next week will be all about them being happy and sweet together ♥

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This drama is so perfect. Everything about it the writing, directing, music, the actors that play the characters, everything is so perfect. I am going to be so sad to see this drama end. I loved the theme of this episode that words have an impact on our lives no matter what circumstance and carrys the weight of the world. Words are so important and they really do effect us. I hope that this drama will finish as great as it started. Looking forward to next weeks episodes!

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I know its not what most people will remember, but the opening scene was wonderful. At first I thought the Jung-Min’s hands-up was just a visual gag played for laughs (the metaphorical armed hold-up by Se-Hee)…instead, it was so much more. The entire scene is punctured by vertical lines cutting from top to bottom of frame and the characters’ relationships are juxtaposed around which side of a walls they are on.

Looking at it now, these three characters’ entire episode is foreshadowed in this first 3 minutes.

What starts as a moment of freedom as Jung-Min stretches instantly turns and leaves her exposed.
- 1st Ji-Ho looks upon Se-Hee and Jung-Min straddling a no-mans land either side of 2 inferred vertical lines through the image.
- 2nd Ji-Ho enters the scene filling the void between the church columns - The columns aligning with the exact frame positions of Se-Hee and Jung-Min in the previous shot.
- 3rd We cut to the reverse shot across the street to see their entire relationship in context…Not only are Se-Hee and Jung Min separated by their own parallel walls, Ji-Ho is now placed as a central character within their no-mans land.
- 4th When we get single shots of Jung-Min, her extended arms tightly confine her from each of the married couple. Her arms make walls so close to her it mirrors that instinctive reaction boxers have when protecting themselves from getting hit. Here it is obvious that the inner wound is deep and personal.

Once Jung-Min hands him her card, she has to put her hands down and without the walls her eyes now avoid contact with Se-Hee and us until the awkwardness forces her to hide in car (the metaphorical and physical box).

The location person must have worked hard for that spot. It’s a collage of lampposts, bollards, church columns, street trees, and shadows. This is all added to with Jung-Min’s up-stretched arms.

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The opening scene is still on my mind. The way they greeted each other was unusual. It was a bit awkward, yet casual. That "hi" he said to her was said the way you'd greet an old friend, not someone who hurt you. I don't know how to explain it, I'm bad with words :)

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I noticed that too. He was actually speaking Banmal with Jung Min all through eventhough they had broken up on bad terms and had been apart for 12 years. There was a level of casual, understanding between them from the intimacy of old.

Yet with Ji Ho whom he loves, he has yet to break out of Chundaemal. I was a bit sad about that, but it will be sooooo epic when he finally drops to Banmal with Ji Ho!!! 😜

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ahhahahaha - your user name is too funny!

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Wow @Tom, that was an amazing analysis of the framing and shots. I noticed the triangle in your 3rd 'shot' with Ji Ho at its apex. I was wondering why Jung Min had her arms raised for so long. I must go and watch it again slowly. 😆

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@growingbeautifully
This scene actually has way more than my short summary.

If you do start to see it, you will also notice this vertical fracturing continues up to w