[Work, life, balance, and K-dramas] Self-realization and the power of wishful thinking
by Guest Beanie
Jealousy Incarnate
As a child and teenager, I built my attitude to work and performance in direct opposition to that of my parents’ ruthless competitiveness. At the time, I could not understand that their childhood circumstances being what they were, they had to be that way to pull themselves up by their proverbial bootstraps. Luckily for me, I still managed to get good enough grades for good enough internships and good enough jobs.
The shift really happened after I started watching Korean dramas. Truthfully, what first drew me to them was the romance and passion (I will never forget Uhm Tae-woong’s descent into the rabbit hole in Delightful Girl Chun-hyang). Then I met characters who had a vision of a much better version of themselves. Instead of being satisfied with the status quo, they kept pushing for more.
For example, there was Na Jin-jin in Gloria, working God knows how many jobs in order to provide for her mentally-challenged sister. Even if her ambition at the beginning was very humble (earning enough money to live her latter years in a good enough retirement home with her sister), she subsequently finds what she is really good at and fights fiercely to achieve her new dream.
Gloria
A more recent K-drama character that contributed in jolting me out of my complacent lifestyle was Pyo Na-ri in Jealousy Incarnate. Her work ethics, her attention to detail, and her determination just blew me away. These are just two examples, but the themes of self-realization and transcendence are present in many K-dramas.
At the time of my awakening, I had been working six years in a social development agency. I took a deep breath, girded my loins, and started asking for more projects. I did my best to complete a task out of my comfort zone, every single day. And I am proud to say that, as of September 2017, I left my old comfortable job for one that will serve as a springboard for my career.
To recapitulate, K-dramas taught me to start wishing for eventful days and stop avoiding life’s daily pains and struggles. These days, I even came up with a new strategy to keep me motivated. I watch a few pilots and choose my favorite. Then, I put that one aside and decide on tasks I need to accomplish before I can allow myself to watch each new episode. A little neurotic, maybe, but what is a K-drama addict with real-life duties supposed to do?
Finally, I would like to tell you an anecdote that beautifully illustrates Paolo Coelho’s famous quote: “And, when you want something, the entire universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” In May 2015, my new effervescent self accepted overtime work for a week. My supervisor just told me that I was to accompany prospective South Korean investors during their visit. They needed someone to translate and interpret for them. Fast forward one week to the closing ceremony dinner. They were obviously happy with my services and I just could not help myself but tell them all about my passion for South Korean culture. I even recall talking to them in a mix of satoori and banmal. I had them in stitches in record time. After coming up for air, the most senior executive told me that a team from my agency was supposed to go for an exchange program to South Korea. He turned to my manager and asked him if he could include me in it… That is how, my dear Beanies, I was able to go on an all-expenses-paid visit to Seoul and Jeju-do. Ironically, my career ended up feeding my K-drama addiction.
Warm and Cozy
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1 LoveSojiSub51
June 27, 2018 at 3:00 PM
Um...Wow. That is amazing that your love of k-dramas was able to push you in a different direction that what you had originally planned. That's so awesome.
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djiboutianbeanie
June 27, 2018 at 10:35 PM
Thank you !!! Yes, I agree with you. I am really indebted to korean dramas... ;-)
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2 risa
June 27, 2018 at 3:29 PM
You know how Viki made that short original drama called Dramaworld about an international fan who got sucked into a K-drama? Well, I think they should make another one about your story. (I especially want to see the part where you're cracking up your South Korean visitors with your mix of satoori and banmal-- I'm laughing just thinking about it!)
I did my best to complete a task out of my comfort zone, every single day. You mean once a month isn't enough? Dang! 😄Thanks for being such an inspiration and best wishes for your new career!
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djiboutianbeanie
June 27, 2018 at 10:47 PM
Thank you so much!! Everyone around me is amazed by my commitment to korean dramas... loooll!! And yes, the satoori and banmal episode was hilarious! I myself still laugh about it whenever I remember..
Increasing my productivity at work was really rewarding because, as I am in the social development field, I really got to see the effects of my exertions on people's lives... That is the greatest motivation... :-)
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3 WishfulToki
June 27, 2018 at 4:03 PM
Hello hello, I saw my name in the title and was confused because I didn't submit anything (it's official: my dramabeans identity has taken over RL identity).
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4 Beverly
June 27, 2018 at 5:04 PM
Yay! Congratulations.
Love this post. Really enjoyed Jealousy Incarnate too.
Just recently almost lost my post to downsizing, but I spoke up (which I never do) at the right time. It was just to express how I felt and later that day they reinstated my position.
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goldenaddiction
June 27, 2018 at 7:13 PM
Wow! I'm so happy for you!
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djiboutianbeanie
June 27, 2018 at 10:54 PM
Congratulations!! I am so happy for you! I also struggle with speaking out for myself... But, I am sure we will learn sooner or later. We have to. Congrats again.. :-)
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KSKalways
June 28, 2018 at 10:54 AM
woooow! Good for you! that's amazing, Beverly @bcampbell1662
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5 blnmom
June 27, 2018 at 6:45 PM
"I watch a few pilots and choose my favorite. Then, I put that one aside and decide on tasks I need to accomplish before I can allow myself to watch each new episode."
Oh, gosh, if I did that I would be SO productive. Either that or I would never get to watch anything (probably more likely). When I grow up, I want to be like you!
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djiboutianbeanie
June 27, 2018 at 11:04 PM
It wasn't easy.. Really... There were times I would sit and stare at the play button of the new episode for long minutes... But a little bit of the inspiration I got from Gloria or Jealousy incarnate would pull me through, most days... If not, then, there was also no regret, because I would be in drama heaven and all would be right with the world! looooool
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6 mugyuljoie is preciousss
June 27, 2018 at 8:07 PM
I love a story where perseverance pays off. Congratulations on your new direction!
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djiboutianbeanie
June 27, 2018 at 11:06 PM
Thank you so much!! I owe a lot of it to the inspiration I got from our beloved dramas.
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7 bbstl 🧹
June 27, 2018 at 8:29 PM
OH @djiboutianbeanie, this is so inspirational! I have both tears in my eyes and a smile a mile wide from your story. You went forth and captured the best of kdrama for your life, and it came right back and rewarded you! Gosh, it really is like a kdrama itself, I agree with @risa that your story deserves to be made by Viki. Of course, in the on-screen version you also have Beanie friends and you get a couple of cute oppas 😍
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djiboutianbeanie
June 27, 2018 at 11:41 PM
Thank you!! It's the magic of kdramas... I am sure that we all had many hilarious events happen to us during our kdrama viewing years. A drama with international beanies and cute oppas!! That would be epic!! Seriously, I would even contribute to the budget, loool!!
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8 greenfields
June 27, 2018 at 8:30 PM
"To recapitulate, K-dramas taught me to start wishing for eventful days and stop avoiding life’s daily pains and struggles." This really hit home. Together with K-pop to be honest, K-dramas have given me the same lesson. And I think the quality of my life has improved greatly as a result. ^^
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djiboutianbeanie
June 28, 2018 at 12:05 AM
I couldn't agree more!! I am planning to garner more inspiration to push me forward (aka more dramas!!)... Let's hope for the best! :-D
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9 fencejumper
June 27, 2018 at 10:19 PM
@djiboutianbeanie Hehee the banmal-satoori speech whilst talking to executives is hilarious. I love how you've become even better at your work and striving harder through watching kdramas. It's like a passion driving you forward.
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djiboutianbeanie
June 28, 2018 at 12:09 AM
Really, it's my heart that spoke that night! No one around me understood my passion for korean dramas and culture and I sorely needed someone who could relate to what I was saying.. Even a tiny bit.
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10 Mimu
June 27, 2018 at 11:24 PM
This is so inspirational. I love how you've turned your love for k drama to make a better and productive version of your self.
I'm so happy for your progress and Korea visit.
May success always kiss your feet.
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djiboutianbeanie
June 28, 2018 at 12:17 AM
Thank you so much Mimu! I am really happy to find like minded people here... May our love for kdramas positively impact all aspects of our lives... :-D
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KSKalways
June 28, 2018 at 10:52 AM
"May success always kiss your feet."
what a beautiful thing to say to someone, @mimu1234. that is really super nice.
I'll be borrowing that saying!
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11 javinne
June 28, 2018 at 2:55 AM
Congratulations on being published! I really enjoy reading your text. Great you even turned your hobby into an asset for your work!
I wish I could do the same, but boy, my job doesn't have anything to do with Korea.
Now, recently one colleague actually went to Korea and she told me it is not so expensive there as I thought. Like, even food and transportation is cheaper than some parts of Europe. And the air ticket is also not that expensive.
My thought: I will save money in order to go for a couple of weeks...
Who knows? Maybe I will find a job as an English teacher and be able to remain there for half a year??? Maybe more???? 🙃😀🤓😎
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djiboutianbeanie
June 29, 2018 at 8:36 AM
Thank you so much, @javinne ! It's my first time being published. I too, would like to go back to korea some day... I am sure we can manage to do it on a small budget... On youtube, we can find tourists giving great advice on how to take inexpensive trips to Seoul, etc. Let's do it!! I'll root for you to get that English teacher job. Fighting!! :-)
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12 MikeyD signed up
June 28, 2018 at 7:35 AM
One thing that struck me early-on in K-drama's was the 'prolonged separation' trope, usually around episode 15. Not that the lovers got cruelly separated for a few years, but that the individual wanted to continue to grow, they still had things they wanted to achieve. That their life extended beyond the rom-com 'boy-gets-girl' endgame.
K-dramas (most dramas) often involved the male having already achieved his place in life and now wanting a personal life. For the female its often the opposite, the demands of her personal life are keeping her from achieving her place in life and that's what she's struggling for.
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djiboutianbeanie
June 29, 2018 at 8:46 AM
I agree with you! I personally thought for a long time that it was very difficult for women to 'have it all'. One book really helped me see more clearly into the issue, it's 'Lean in' by Sheryl Sandberg. A great book, we should maybe gift it to some kdrama writers ;-)
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13 Ally
June 28, 2018 at 8:18 AM
Wow! Now, did you learn to speak fluently while watching dramas exclusively, or did you also teach yourself? That’s amazing you carried on a conversation and was able to translate for native Koreans! Your diligence and discipline is commendable. Congratulations on everything and best wishes for your continued success!
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djiboutianbeanie
June 29, 2018 at 8:53 AM
Hello @Ally !! No, I wasn't translating in Korean. I was translating from English to French and vice versa. I am not at all fluent in Korean.. But after seven years in Korean dramaland, I learnt a few expressions and such.. I was telling them about my love for Korea and one of the executives asked me if I could speak korean. That's when I laid out all the sentences I could remember, loooool.
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Ally
June 29, 2018 at 11:36 AM
Oh! That must have been hilarious! I wonder how many expressions I’ve picked up!
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14 KSKalways
June 28, 2018 at 10:48 AM
BRAVO!!! just BRAVO!!!
now THAT's a really AWESOME story and I looove that it's all happening to a REAL person, and not just some kdrama character! I applaud your discipline, @djiboutianbeanie and shall work at applying the same discipline to my own life!
amazing!
ah, and about your wonderful Paolo Coelho quote: “And, when you want something, the entire universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” --> it is from years of wanting to be a yoga teacher that the stars aligned this year and, out of the blue, I was blessed with a HUGE bonus at work and some random family aid - all this within 2 weeks from applying to the yoga teacher training program! The Good Lord is good indeed and I actually am well on my way to follow my passion (as a side job).
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djiboutianbeanie
June 29, 2018 at 8:59 AM
Thank you so much @kethysk!! I am very grateful to the Lord, and I try to thank Him everyday... Congratulations on getting to enjoy your passion as a side job, it's really wonderful and must be so rewarding! I really think that we can do a lot if we are really inspired...
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15 wapz
June 28, 2018 at 11:17 AM
Wow that's actually great that kdramas inspired you to do better. As far as takin you to korea.
For me it has been the opposite as I feel kdramas have been plunging me into a hole where I am extremely distracted from my reality and deep down in escapism.
Also I think kdramas set standards that are difficult to achieve but seeing you it seems it isn't entirely impossible.
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djiboutianbeanie
June 30, 2018 at 5:16 AM
Hello @wapzy!! Your comment really touched me... I was exactly like that for a few years. I wasn't looking for inspiration or motivation to do better but just an escape from reality. However, the healing power of some of our favorite dramas is no joke... I slowly started noticing the small things that I COULD change and did just that... And continued from then onward.
Yes, the standards set by our kdramas are too difficult to achieve and I don't think we should even attempt to do so... Instead of looking at them as standards, I just take a general sense of purpose from them and do what I can given my own circumstances... We should never let other people set standards for us. Everyone has a set of challenging circumstances that he or she has to grapple with... Aja aja fighting!! :-D
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wapz
July 1, 2018 at 12:49 PM
Thanks @djiboutianbeanie
Your comment was actually helpful. I think in some ways kdramas are helping us by giving a resolution or a happy ending to someone who is struggling but then when I compare it to real life then it looks unrealistic. However, you are right, it is better to grasp a general sense of purpose rather than looking for timely success that comes within 16 episodes of our life.
I hope, we one way or the other follow the path that is better for us.
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16 PakalanaPikake
June 28, 2018 at 7:55 PM
Thanks for your essay, @djiboutianbeanie! Reading of your real-life Kdrama exploits made my day. ;-)
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djiboutianbeanie
June 30, 2018 at 5:21 AM
Thank you for reading it, @pakalanapikake !! It's the first that got published... :-D I ask for your continued support in case another one gets accepted... Much love!!
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17 pickledplumtree
July 27, 2018 at 11:11 AM
Love that ending! :)
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