[Community] Love, February
by Guest Beanie
Angel’s Last Mission: Love
A few years ago, I started up a writing challenge that I dubbed “Love, February.” Every February, for the fourteen days leading up to Valentine’s Day, I would write on the subject of love (and not just romantic love, all love). It could be a poem, a short story, musings, or just a straight up list of favorite love songs or scenes.
My first “Love, February” was borne of loneliness. I was in a new city, a new school, a new career. It was just plain hard. I tried to push through it and told myself, “This was the right decision, I’m in the right place.”
In my attempts to carry on as usual that year, I focused on Valentine’s Day. I had always loved it and at home Valentine’s Day meant a big holiday meal (courtesy of my mom), complete with cake, and small gifts. The previous three years at university, I had thrown Valentine’s parties for my friends where we made heart-shaped foods, had pink drinks and watched rom-coms. I knew that year though that just a party wouldn’t cut it. Darn it, I needed to write!
Writing is like breathing. You expel the words, words, words that are trapped inside like CO2, which build up like a toxin in the body if you can’t get them out.
That first year, I wrote about both fictional and real love. I wrote of my mom’s lentil soup, which I made every week back then, of my purring cat. Of fictional stories I wish I had the ability to write novels instead of paragraphs about.
I also planned a party for the few friends I had then, even though at that point I was so busy I could barely manage to meet up once a week for a meal with them.
On February 9th, I passed out at school from exhaustion and malnutrition. I was so stressed I hadn’t realized I had stopped eating properly. The party was canceled and the “Love, February” challenge went uncompleted.
I made two more attempts to complete the challenge in the following years. By that point I was living with friends and beginning to be comfortable in my work, but I still found it difficult to sustain the focus on love for the full fourteen days that “Love, February” called for.
In 2019, I sighed when I saw February was approaching. It was a new year but I wasn’t where I wanted to be in my career or personal life. There was nothing new to love in my life. I feared I would only be rehashing thoughts I had already written about. So I gathered my courage and did something rather brave (for me). I invited Beanies to join.
And I was overwhelmed.
Strong Woman Do Bong-soon
Beanies, some I knew, some I didn’t, poured their hearts out on the theme of love. I woke up each morning eager to read what people had written. We were located across the world, and perhaps the only thing we had in common was a love of K-dramas, but that was enough.
THIS is community. A place where we laugh together, can cry together, celebrate together, and mourn together. Together, we experience love.
That month I learned love was K-dramas, books, K-pop, movies, family, cats, friends, food, mathematics, and so much more than I can fit here in this short post. Love is a journey that we each embark on, and I am so thankful that we can go part of the way together. What people wrote was real, often raw, and created with a love that was as sincere as that of a first love in a drama.
Thank you Beanies, for being the very best Valentines this February.
Thank you Dramabeans, for creating this community.
Tags: Theme of the Month