C.S. Lewis, in his book called The Four Loves, expounds on four different sorts of love: familial love, platonic love, romantic/erotic love, and charity. But, the one I want to talk about is platonic love, because it is so underrated.
Unlike romantic love (according to C.S. Lewis), platonic love does not gaze AT the object of affection, but rather two people, side by side, gaze in the same direction at a common object of affection. Their affection for that object is what binds them together.
In my own musing on love, I call some types of love “redemptive” love and others “joyful love”. While the categories are by no means mutually exclusive, I do mean something different for each. “Redemptive” love is when two people share a similar kind of pain, and through empathy, compassion, and kindness, each tries to help the other heal. So, the common denominator is pain. In “joyful” love, I mean the things that give us joy because it touches upon something that is so intrinsically essential to our flourishing and thriving, who we were made to be, that we feel more alive and ourselves when we are immersed in it. Redemptive love (hopefully) is temporary, but joyful love is forever.
What I love about Dramabeans is that I find a community in which we all love these stories which are told, the characters created, and the scenarios that challenge, move and awaken us to who we are, and who we wish to be. Sure, there are redemptive elements to watching these shows (who doesn’t need a good cry every once in a while?). But, more than that, I love how we can muse over, argue over, and fangirl over our favorite actors, actresses, characters, music, and storyline. It is the love of story that binds us together. I love what a warm community it has been for me. Truly, I feel blessed to be able to chat excitedly about our newest drama obsession together.
Thanks so much for being my “joyful” friends around the world!
I can totally understand and empathize with all that you've shared in your post…. And it's all the more deeply felt for me, an INFJ personality type XD
I too am a big fan of CS Lewis and he wrote something about if we look into the lives of our enemies we will see that they too have suffered great pain.
I can’t remember the book or the exact quote but it spoke LOADS to me.
It definitely speaks truth… A lot of times, we are so quick to react and to respond to negativity, we don’t try to think deeper–if at all– about the root of where all the negativity comes from
@pineapplegongzhu
You captured my sentiments about this site and our beanie friends all over the world perfectly. I don’t know what I would do without all of you.
And about the love – my mom told me once
“We are here to love each other into wholeness”
That thought has gotten me through many things in life.
love and hugs to all of you!
I DO recommend it! The most words I have ever written in an essay on a drama is for Lookout!
The ending… sigh the ending is not executed in the best way, but I still recommend it for the character writing and acting along, which is pretty phenomenal.
I also cried three times in my write up of it and I never cry for dramas.
And the reason I mention it here is because in my opinion anyway, the show comes one of the closest I’ve seen in dramaland to addressing the idea of Agape (or Charity).
(And also your redemptive love haha).
It’s not perfect, but it makes you think anyway.
(@ally-le can back me up hehehe)
pineapplegongzhu
February 4, 2020 at 1:26 PM
My love for the Beanies,
C.S. Lewis, in his book called The Four Loves, expounds on four different sorts of love: familial love, platonic love, romantic/erotic love, and charity. But, the one I want to talk about is platonic love, because it is so underrated.
Unlike romantic love (according to C.S. Lewis), platonic love does not gaze AT the object of affection, but rather two people, side by side, gaze in the same direction at a common object of affection. Their affection for that object is what binds them together.
In my own musing on love, I call some types of love “redemptive” love and others “joyful love”. While the categories are by no means mutually exclusive, I do mean something different for each. “Redemptive” love is when two people share a similar kind of pain, and through empathy, compassion, and kindness, each tries to help the other heal. So, the common denominator is pain. In “joyful” love, I mean the things that give us joy because it touches upon something that is so intrinsically essential to our flourishing and thriving, who we were made to be, that we feel more alive and ourselves when we are immersed in it. Redemptive love (hopefully) is temporary, but joyful love is forever.
What I love about Dramabeans is that I find a community in which we all love these stories which are told, the characters created, and the scenarios that challenge, move and awaken us to who we are, and who we wish to be. Sure, there are redemptive elements to watching these shows (who doesn’t need a good cry every once in a while?). But, more than that, I love how we can muse over, argue over, and fangirl over our favorite actors, actresses, characters, music, and storyline. It is the love of story that binds us together. I love what a warm community it has been for me. Truly, I feel blessed to be able to chat excitedly about our newest drama obsession together.
Thanks so much for being my “joyful” friends around the world!
Love,
February
pineapplegongzhu
February 4, 2020 at 1:27 PM
@katakwasabi
@leetennant
@ally-le
@snarkyjellyfish
@bebeswtz
@msrabbit
@kat23
@hebang
@ndlessjoie
@yuyuu
@lugirl131415
@tspmasala
@willow
@moomoomoondog
@carmen
@sicarius
@mindy
@gadis
@coffeeprince4eva
@suriyana-shah
@pinklolipop
@egads
@rukia
@pineapplegongzhu
@thetinyl
@sensationalfantasy
Bebe | Nessa❣️
February 4, 2020 at 1:32 PM
Awwwww this is beautiful, @pineapplegongzhu <3
I can totally understand and empathize with all that you've shared in your post…. And it's all the more deeply felt for me, an INFJ personality type XD
This is me in a nutshell, especially #3 haha
Bebe | Nessa❣️
February 4, 2020 at 1:33 PM
I also love C.S. Lewis– he’s one of my Christian and literary heroes
stpauligurl
February 4, 2020 at 1:43 PM
I too am a big fan of CS Lewis and he wrote something about if we look into the lives of our enemies we will see that they too have suffered great pain.
I can’t remember the book or the exact quote but it spoke LOADS to me.
Bebe | Nessa❣️
February 4, 2020 at 1:49 PM
It definitely speaks truth… A lot of times, we are so quick to react and to respond to negativity, we don’t try to think deeper–if at all– about the root of where all the negativity comes from
stpauligurl
February 4, 2020 at 1:45 PM
@pineapplegongzhu
You captured my sentiments about this site and our beanie friends all over the world perfectly. I don’t know what I would do without all of you.
And about the love – my mom told me once
“We are here to love each other into wholeness”
That thought has gotten me through many things in life.
love and hugs to all of you!
💜🍍☠ Sicarius The Queen of Melonia ☠🍍💜
February 4, 2020 at 2:11 PM
Ahhhh I am reading the Four Loves at the moment hehe and I love your addition of Redemptive and Joyful love.
Also- this may seem random, but I promise it is kind of related- have you seen Lookout? The drama.
pineapplegongzhu
February 4, 2020 at 2:22 PM
@sicarius: No, I haven’t been fortunate enough to have yet. Is it good? Do you recommend it?
💜🍍☠ Sicarius The Queen of Melonia ☠🍍💜
February 4, 2020 at 2:28 PM
I DO recommend it! The most words I have ever written in an essay on a drama is for Lookout!
The ending… sigh the ending is not executed in the best way, but I still recommend it for the character writing and acting along, which is pretty phenomenal.
I also cried three times in my write up of it and I never cry for dramas.
And the reason I mention it here is because in my opinion anyway, the show comes one of the closest I’ve seen in dramaland to addressing the idea of Agape (or Charity).
(And also your redemptive love haha).
It’s not perfect, but it makes you think anyway.
(@ally-le can back me up hehehe)
Ally
February 4, 2020 at 7:10 PM
LOOKOUT is all about love and forgiveness—not the romantic kind but the redemptive kind that you so eloquently expanded on.
Tay
February 4, 2020 at 2:56 PM
Hello
What a wonderful text.
Thanks for sharing
An example of redeeming love could be that of IU and Lee Sun-kyun in My Ahjussi?
pineapplegongzhu
February 4, 2020 at 9:35 PM
Tay: exactly!
Karmen ~ 🍜🏢🎭 ~ 📚☔🦋 ~ 🪂🌱💘 ~ ✨🍊💫 ~
February 5, 2020 at 1:34 PM
Thanks to you, it’s beautiful!