I have made serious transgression against The Untamed Beanies with my previous post today that justifiably warrants at least 33 lashings on my back.

To directly remediate the situation, I am addressing head-on @outofthisworld‘s trauma regarding some inappropriately sized hands.

What do we need more in this world? We need hands assuring us that everything will be alright

And hands which will shock and yaoi even the most callous souls

But most importantly, when these hands come together, we die happy in Delululand.

#interlockingthewayintomyheart

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Times like these I really hate capitalism.

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You turn this sublime master of darkness into…..
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This atrocity of fright and shame???
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Our ethereal unwavering lightness of being is now…

Lan Zhan

I give up….I don’t know what this is 😭…..also the background flower reference is from the wrong story!!!

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If MXTX endorses these merch I should not be surprised. Her writing reveals that she has some dark wicked sense of humor.

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Because @outofthisworld wonderful tribute to the rain scene in the The Untamed hit me like 33 Lan Sect cane lashes leaving me debilitated for unspecified duration:

I know I can count on you, Xiao Zhan!

#TheUntamedHadMeLike

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#CampaignUntamed Internal Memo
To: All Campaign Staff
From: @kimbapnoona, Campaign Manager
Subject: Seeking Musicians Union and World Shaman Guild Endorsement

Would this series of ads be fitting since both professions to some certain extent deal with altered states of consciousness?

The Association of Nail Technicians might also be pleased.

Look forward to hearing your thoughts,

KBNN, Wei Ying for President
#RevengeIsBestServedBloodRed

https://ohsehuns.tumblr.com/post/186216691164/the-untamed-yiling-laozu-wei-wuxian

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#CampaignUntamed Internal Memo
To: All Campaign Staff
From: @kimbapnoona, Campaign Manager
Subject: Securing Endorsement from The Cat Fanciers Association
Date: 10/05/2019

Mr. Lan\’s love for cats shines through without problematic boundary issue:

While Candidate Wei\’s lackadaisical attitude while grooming could dilute the message:

Would we able to win over voters with varying degree of feline partiality by releasing these footages? I look forward to your assessment.

KBNN, Wei Ying for President

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To: Wei Ying, Presidential Candidate (aka Xiao Zhan)
From: @kimbapnoona, #CampaignUntamed Manager and Personal Fan
Date: 10/05/2019

It almost seems like just a couple months ago when I first met you, the free spirited cultivator-in-training studying in Cloud Recesses who didn\’t care much for schooling and only wanted to play.

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So it was not surprising that you got kicked out quickly and became a troubled youth when you joined a less elite high school.

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I was so very proud that you later found your passion for the arts and developed the aesthetic self by studying design in a university in Chonqing.

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Soon after college graduation and once you have decided to fight for the powerless no matter how great the personal cost it might be, I knew I wanted to devote myself to your cause. As exhilirating as some of the stops were meeting our supporters, there has been some agonizing nights in the hotels debating our campaign strategies on the trail.

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But still on a day like this, Zhan di di, please know you have a great team here supporting you and loving who you are and what you stand for.

Happy birthday, and even with bad memories like yours, try to remember all the things which make you happy everyday.

With love, care, and possibly inappropriate level of delusion,

Your noona Kimbap

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#Campaign Untamed Memo
To: All Campaign Staff
From: @kimbapnoona, Campaign Manager
Date: 10/03/2019

In our continued effort to brand Candidate Wei and his husband Mr. Lan, here are two directions we can take simultaneously to further brand WangXian:

Direction 1: Appeal to the Mind:

Together
Exhibit A \”We are compassionate intellectuals than understated turtleneck sweaters\”
Together Flower
Exhibit B \”We got the flower boy looks but with Wuxia heroes\’ dignified and principled characters\”
Direction 2: Appeal to the Body:
c7a0614c-ba41-4645-85f3-9bc8df54a913
Exhibit A: If anyone knows anything about WangXian it is that Mr. Lan has fondness for tying things up. Here we see that his forehead band has been reinterpreted as Candidate Wei\’s tie.
af5c50f0-c19e-4fe3-a21e-0ea84e36507e

Exhibit B: Throwing this in the mix, because, they look so mysteriously hot together.

As always, I look forward to your thoughts for the second push of our high impact image campaign.

Eagerly,
KBNN, Wei Ying for President

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#Campaign Untamed Memo
To: @outofthisworld, Chief of Staff
From: @kimbapnoona, Campaign Manager
Date: 10/02/2019

Thank you for alerting me regarding our opponents’ smear campaign especially regarding Mr. Lan\’s more \”lively\” interactions with other cultivators. I believe we must proactively launch our own high impact image campaign to counteract whatever negative effect that \”Fake Dynasty\” might have resided in the voters\’ minds.

Luckily, our esteemed Image Consultant @trinpie was able to secure an impromptu shoot with Harper\’s Bazaar and here are a few of the options we might consider releasing to the public, in no particular order:

1) Snow Scene with Their Pet Bunny \”Tien Tien\” (倩倩, i.e. Everyday)

Still fresh on most voters\’ mind, this image references the scene of Candidate Wei\’s biographical documentary The Untamed. Both the gesture and the message of saying \”thank you\” and \”I\’m sorry\” to his husband for all that they have been through together two life times worth I believe will continue to resonate with the voters.

2) The Close Up Says:
Candidate Wei: \”I am reaching out to you, Voter, and tell me how I can help\”
Mr. Lan: \”I am listening with undivided attention\”

3) Looking Fierce with Dignified Composure
This says that \”we are ready to face any challenges TOGETHER even if it means going against all odds.\”

Mr. Lan positioned behind Candidate Wei signifies that \”behind every successful man there is a more successful man.\” Among the campaign staffers we can all agree that His Lightness is the one who wears the real robe in the family, so this is a truthful representation to the couple\’s dynamics.

As always, thank you for your vigilance combating fake news. I look forward to hearing your thoughts.

Best,
KBNN, Wei Ying For President

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#CampaignUntamed Internal Memo
To: All Campaign Staff
From: @kimbapnoona, Campaign Manager

I would like to congratulate all of you on a very successful inaugural campaign rally yesterday evening in the town of Yunmeng.

The pre-rally interview went smoothly. Some members of the press have remarked on that lip bite (thank you for bringing this to my attention Campaign Researcher @giegie0384.) Nothing beats sex appeal that is unconsciously unleashed to the untamed public.

As we are aware by now, Candidate Wei\’s smiles are the best. THE BEST. I mean they are freaking sublime!!! And yes, the crowd went crazy, as did many of us staffers present.

Thank you Campaign Strategist @jenmole for suggesting this segment of the rally. It really endears our candidate to the voters. I dare anyone to show me a cuter chubbier dancing baby!!


Who has ever seen such a sexy strut from a baby in diapers? NOBODY!

Thank you for all of your effort, and on to the next stop we go!

Warmest regards,
Kimbapnoona, Wei Ying for President

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#CampaignUntamed Internal Memo
To: @outofthisworld, Chief of Staff
From: @kimbapnoona, Campaign Manager
CC: @trinpie, Image Consultant, @egads, Press Secretary
Date: 9/30/2019

It has come to my attention that some of our core demographic has been fascinated by the impressive phalangeal features of both Candidate Wei Ying and his husband Lan Zhan. I wonder if we need to have a tighter grip concerning this matter both in the media as well as through various social media platforms.

Here are some on my thoughts of we can shape this conversation:

POSITIVE IMAGE: Mr. Lan Zhan\’s gentle caress speaks about his care for the welfare of the vulnerable

NEGATIVE IMAGE: Candidate Wei Ying\’s gentle caress here seems to inform the public that he devalues the sanctity of marriage

POSITIVE IMAGE: This is a dignified way to demonstrate with fingers on how to cultivate energy with one\’s sword (the poll has shown Bichen is extremely popular with female voters age 35-55)

NEGATIVE IMAGE: This is NOT a dignified way to demonstrate anything.

I look forward to your thoughts on how we can further effectively frame the dialogue to raise our poll number digits in various demographic groups.

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      Intern @maybemaknae, please file the above memo in our shared drive for our record at your earliest convenience.

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        *mumurs* My boss thinks President piano tapping that sword ⚔ is negative…. *humphily shuffles that memo, (aka loses it) so the stuck up higher officials can’t criticise my dear prez.*
        GAZES, SWOONS & MOONS OVER THE GIF…
        mission secret joy files of locked folder on office 🖥accomplished

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          Intern @maybemaknae,

          I understand where your resentment is coming from…..I was once a young maknae once. We all have our own secret joy files but we keep those skeletons in the metaphorical closet.

          Politics ain’t for tamed masses, take care. I see much potential in you.

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            Hehehe 🤭
            I tried being official & fancy like you & wrote a whole comment but now I lost it & so here’s the paraphrased comment : recent stats collected from sns show that the public loves our candidate candid moments shot by the paparazzi. Girls 15-20 & women 21-35 love WY for how chivalrous he is
            Men have also shown marvel & interest in the brotherhood & togetherness displayed by our candidate 😉😃

            I also discovered I can’t underline text on db

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    *snort* 😂😂😂

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    That last gif… well, that might appeal to literary crowd.

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    Why is this campaign getting funnier & funnier each post. 😂

    Images above just show the β€œthem” in public eye, but the β€œthem” behind close doors is completely another story. Read Incense Burner for proof. LOL

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      It is difficult to gauge @giegie0384 the significant impact of Candidate Wei’s autobiography Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation (Mo Dao Zu Shi) by the excellent writer Mo Xiang Tong Xiu. The postscript “Incense Burner” details extremely intimate moments between our couple, but perhaps it just further impresses upon the voters of their strong and long commitment toward one another in every way imagined?

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        😂
        I was not clear above but what I was trying to say was that WX may seem the indecent one with pervy thoughts and not LZ but the truth is it’s the other way around. 😂 Like you mentioned before β€œit’s the quiet ones”!

        Excuse my incomprehensible post above as I was so distracted by the Bichen in WY’s hand. Lol.

        Or they might get traumatized and not use ginger for at least one month and contemplate whether to vote for him or not! (Wait…wrong chapter! 😂)

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          We just gotta drive the message hard to the voters that their relationship has always been febrific ever since they were teens even if it was just in their fantasies!

          I do apologize though for the misleading last gif for both you @giegie0384 and @trinpie, that was Xue Yang with Xiao Xing Chen’s swore Shuanghua .
          See, the villain here however sympathetic, delivers the confused message!

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            I’ve been wanting to comment all day but was drowning at work.

            This has got to be one of your finest work. You may have redeemed yourself. 😂

            #CampaignUntamed
            #LanZhanJuice4eva
            #Ginger
            #Febrific
            #IncenseBurner
            #EverydayIsEveryday

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            Oh dang!!!! I give up! 😂 I even failed to recognize Shuanghua and Xue Yang’s hand. Lol.

            Febrific is the word of the year! 😍😄

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        *biography

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    That last gif does things to me I can’t talk about in public 😳 we definitely need to make sure that doesnt get out so I can file it away for personal viewing 😏

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    I can’t. *hides*

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    Lord, forgive me for focusing too much on that last gif.

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    Noona, Noona!!
    am so glad to see that many beanies have ‘been here and done that’. somehow all these posts are very comforting and hope this eases this tender heart.

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#CampaignUntamed Internal Memo
To: @trinpie, Image Consultant
From: @kimbapnoona, Campaign Manager
Date: 9/29/2019

I appreciate your initial assessment on 9/26/2019 regarding the direction of the styling of Patriarch Yilin, and I wholeheartedly agree that we need to immediately focus on our candidate\’s styling that will no longer sabotage his visual.

Here are some ideas for your consideration:

A look that says \”Wei Ying is eager to listen to what people have to say\”
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And not one that seems to suggest a candidate who is confused by random floating objects like a shark balloon(???)

Shark

Properly accessorize our candidate that will frame his handsome face like this:
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Instead of the one that seems to suppress his intelligence from above (what the what?????):
What????

I look forward to your and everyone\’s thoughts, and thank you for your expertise in advance.

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I, kimbap noona, would like you to know why we need a President Wei Ying in our tumultuous world:

The Yilin Patriarch cares for the well beings of animals.
President Wei Ying will ensure that ethical treatment of animals is practiced throughout the cultivator world.

The Yilin Patriarch is an enthusiastic locavore.
President Wei Ying will support developments which will foster sustainable agriculture.

Some of Yilin Patriarch fondest memories took place in the library.
President Wei Ying will ensure that our local libraries are well funded.

President Wei Ying is ready to lead the way for these worthy causes!

We want YOU to join the #CampaignUntamed

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I, kimbap noona, have elected her self to be the manager of the presidential campaign of Grandmaster Wei Ying (aka Xiao Zhan in 21th century speak.)

Candidate Wei Ying is ready for his first town hall meeting which will be held in the Inn at Gusu. Open bar with Empress\’ Smile provided free of charge.
Press Secretary @egads, will our candidate be perfectly pitched to untame all the Undead in the audience and in the press box

Note: #CampaignUntamed is a cautionary tale of a delulu fan\’s imagination walking down the single-plank bridge in the dark.
This post may or may not be a thinly veiled excuse to post Xiao Zhan gif.

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