[Dramaland Catnip] When the hero falls first
by girlfriday
Strong Woman Do Bong-soon
There’s something about this concept of dramaland catnip that really appeals to me—the tropes or elements of a drama that lure me back in without fail, like a moth to a flame—because it puts the blame on the dramas for sucking up all of my time and making me addicted. I couldn’t help it, you see! It was the catnip that got me!
Though dramaland is rife with tasty catnip everywhere you turn, I have a particular attraction to romances where the hero falls in love first. Specifically, dramas in which the hero spends a good deal of the time pining in an unrequited love that is then requited in the end (otherwise, it becomes Second Lead Syndrome, and that is the way of paaaaaain).
It’s just one of those things I chalk up to pure preference, because I always gravitate towards love stories where the heroine is pursued and not the other way around. Perhaps it’s wish fulfillment—in my experience, real-life romance is full of flailing, awkward, mistimed confessions, and if there’s one thing I’d like to go back in time and tell my younger self, it’s to pay less attention to the hot guy and notice the doofus with a crush on you. Not that my sixteen-year-old self would ever listen. She was stubborn and thought adults were stupid.
In order to be truly catnippy for me, the hero has to spend a significant portion of the drama in a one-sided love, not just be the first to fall in love or confess his feelings. It’s all about the pining that ensues when the hero realizes he’s fallen—the delightfully angsty period of unrequited love and jealousy, because OF COURSE, she likes somebody else. It would just be too easy otherwise. And the pettier the jealousy and the longer the angsty pining, the better.
Answer Me 1997
I can trace my addiction to this particular trope all the way from 1997’s Propose—where the hero spent the bulk of the drama with a secret crush on his lifelong best friend while she almost married the wrong guy—to 2017’s Strong Woman Do Bong-soon—where we had a heroine who was blind to the hero’s affections because of a longtime crush on her friend, and a hero who fell for her instantly and waited on the sidelines for her to get over her first love. I found Park Hyung-shik’s hero to be just the right amount of patient/impatient, prodding but not pushy, and his jealousy for the starry-eyed way that Park Bo-young’s heroine looked at her crush was the cutest thing I’d seen in a long time. (And how satisfying was it when it was finally his turn to get the glory backlighting of reciprocated attraction?)
But what Strong Woman Do Bong-soon highlights best about this trope is that it puts the hero in the position of the observer, and he sees and loves the heroine for who she is, and not the version of herself she thinks she needs to project in order to be loved. In stark contrast to the willowy, helpless girl the heroine thought she needed to be in front of her crush, the hero saw her super-strength and was attracted to her because of it, and he reinforced time and again that her strength was a gift and an asset. He was the observer who saw everything going on in the love triangle and was aware of all sides, including his own painfully unrequited position in it, and when he saw the heroine’s insecurity and self-doubt, his approach to winning her over was to make her realize that she was lovable, and loved by him.
Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok-ju
The love triangle in Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok-ju was very similar in its themes, just less superpowered and more down to earth (but no less swoony!), and though this hero spent more time being clueless about his feelings, I appreciated so much that he was always the heroine’s best cheerleader, even when it angered him to watch her pine after someone who didn’t see how great she was.
Sometimes it’s simply the pure devotion that hooks me. There are some quiet pining heroes who are in it for the long game, like Seo In-gook’s character in Answer Me 1997, who spent eight years nursing his epic first crush and probably would’ve taken his unrequited love to the grave if the heroine hadn’t forced him to fess up. I Hear Your Voice’s hero takes the cake for searching for his first love for ten years, risking his life to protect hers, and falling for her again even after getting amnesia. Talk about your enduring loves.
Romantic Doctor Teacher Kim
And even in instances where the intensity doesn’t run that deep, this romance setup is addictive to me for the courtship shenanigans alone. There’s the breed of hero who makes foolish, overt declarations of love, like Yoo Yeon-seok’s character did all throughout Romantic Doctor Teacher Kim, much to Seo Hyun-jin’s embarrassment and my enjoyment. That hero was hilariously brash and put his foot in his mouth with a new confession at any given opportunity, each time in front of more and more people on the hospital staff until every single doctor, nurse, and orderly had become witness to his one-sided crush. I always loved the hero of Biscuit Teacher Star Candy for that reason too—he wore his bleeding heart right there on his sleeve, for the world to see.
On the flipside, there’s the hero for whom falling first means that he shows his feelings through the quiet thankless gesture of love. This is dramaland after all—doing nice stuff for credit isn’t heroic, you have to be anonymous and stealthy about it! Twenty Again’s hero was a little over-the-top with his stealthiness, but when he wasn’t being petty (which was admittedly most of the time), he went out of his way to protect everything that was important to the heroine without any hope of her loving him in return. This type of Daddy Long Legs character is usually the classic second lead, but once in a while it’s nice to meet a hero who spends all of his energy trying to make a heroine happy. Often it’s the mundane things that make me swoon the most, like Kim Young-kwang’s character in Plus Nine Boys taking the wrong bus every night for a year just so he could spend the ride home with his crush Kyung Su-jin, not caring that he had to double back in the opposite direction every time.
Plus Nine Boys
My favorite result of the hero falling first is the jealousy that ensues when the heroine’s attentions are directed at his rival. Jealousy is like catnip concentrate to me—I love how immature and petty and honest it makes people, and how it drives a loveline to the point of awareness. In every drama I know where the hero falls first, jealousy plays a big part in getting him to realize his feelings or act on them, sometimes to comical effect or crushing angst, or more likely, a bit of both.
Jealousy Incarnate is probably the best example of this that I know. It’s worth noting that technically, the heroine falls first in this drama, and spends three years pining after the hero in the show’s backstory. But then the hero is dealt a karmic blow when he falls for her after she’s moved on and is dating his best friend, sending him into a spiral of angst and jealousy and unrequited longing. Though this hero realizes his feelings all too late, there’s an added layer of satisfaction in the reversal—he only has himself to blame, and he knows it. The one-sided love in this drama is so painfully good, mainly because Jo Jung-seok is emotionally raw and funny-sad in a way that only he can do. Love is like an affliction for him, and he’s so desperate to be rid of these unwelcome feelings that he’s constantly mad at the heroine (inexplicably, from her point of view) for being so cute that he can’t help but love her. It’s as ridiculous and adorable as it sounds.
Jealousy Incarnate
In dramas they always say that the one who loves more is the weak one—not a weaker person, but the one in the weaker position in the relationship—and I just like this dynamic where the hero is the one in a position of disadvantage because he loves more. Whether it’s Strong Woman Do Bong-soon’s hero laying his heart bare and asking the heroine to love him back, or Jealousy Incarnate’s hero begging to know which man the heroine loves just one percent more than the other, I like that this puts the choice and the power in the heroine’s hands, letting her call the shots in the relationship. Jealousy Incarnate is a hilarious example of how this power shifts from person to person whenever someone is loved more—after pining pathetically for the heroine, the hero briefly reclaims this power the minute he realizes that she loves him back, and lords it over her childishly. Knowledge is power, people.
I’m sure you’ve realized by now that the huge gaping pitfall of this trope is Second Lead Syndrome. Because no matter how much you tell yourself not to be catnipped onto the wrong ship, you will inevitably be lured by a pining schoolboy (Answer Me 1988) or two (Who Are You–School 2015), and find yourself wailing into a pile of tissues and cursing your incurable affliction for heroes with one-sided loves. This is an unavoidable side effect for which there is no recourse. That’s just the price we pay for our addictions, because if we could stop ourselves with logic, then it wouldn’t be catnip, would it?
I Hear Your Voice
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Tags: Answer Me 1997, I Hear Your Voice, Jealousy Incarnate, Plus Nine Boys, Propose, Romantic Doctor Teacher Kim, Strong Woman Do Bong-soon, Theme of the Month, Twenty Again, Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok-ju
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51 teacup
June 6, 2017 at 7:40 AM
Yup, this is my catnip for sure and love at first sight. I'm still watching Ruler because Sun fall into Ga-eun's arm when they first meet. Ha...I need to find another show where the hero first fall into the heroine arms. hehehe
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toramona
July 17, 2017 at 4:54 PM
It happens in Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok Joo technically in the leads past but it's super adorable and that's when he crushes on her hard.
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52 sidnerella
June 6, 2017 at 7:45 AM
This is so my cat-nip. I love the adorable pining. Especially in Jealousy Incarnate. It was nice to see such an arrogant man brought to his knees because of his one sided love, plus it was portrayed so well! But yes...the pitfall to this catnip is so "second-lead syndrome." I have it way too often, and it always leaves a big, heart tugging hole in my heart. There's just something a man doing everything he can for the object of his affection even when he doesn't expect anything back. Darn you second leads!!!
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53 coby
June 6, 2017 at 8:39 AM
Jealousy is so entertaining in dramaland. I've seen all those dramas above! I thought best friends to lovers is my catnip.
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54 boholanna
June 6, 2017 at 8:43 AM
Let's add Ahn Joong-Hee (Lee Joon) from Father is Strange to this list. Loving the angst!
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55 Nodame
June 6, 2017 at 8:48 AM
Great article! WOW you nailed it for me when Jo Jung Seok nailed it in Jealous Incarnate for being juvenile, childish and so adorbs being jealous of his bestie when he realized he liked the gal who liked him for 3 yrs, karma bit him in the butt. In the end he did get her but the process was squee worthy for me to watch. Plus I love the actor and that HOT kiss in the hospital. Yes Yoo Yun Seok for Romantic Dr Kim, I did enjoy his love declarations all to his sunbae/nuna. Too cute! As for Seo In Guk, his unrequited love for his first LOVE ---- all the feels! He made it swoon worthy totally agree. As for normal love for REAL people Nam Joo Hyuk in Weightlifting Fairy Bok Joo---I wanted him for myself! The cheerleader bestie and to boot hearing they are dating in real life (later on made it more sweeter for me). Yes Hyun Sik--we need more of him and his character---I concur the right mix of support but not too much to have the gal like him in Shin Bong Soon---missing that drama too. When he finally got his turn of the "sunny angelic glow" ---I was so ecstatic! I love this TROPE! Totally agree! Now I can sing a happy song reading this great write up. Yippee.
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56 Playstore, Okay Or Not Okay
June 6, 2017 at 10:36 AM
*sees the catnip* MEWWOUOOIUGLHASFLDFGHJKL
*jumps right into the sparkly dramaworld and imagines playing with oppa cats*
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toramona
July 17, 2017 at 4:56 PM
OMG this an addddoorrable comment. All the thumbs ups.
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57 WishfulToki
June 6, 2017 at 10:45 AM
Yep, goes for me too. I think it's also appearing in Fight My Way, even though Dong Man doesn't know it. Every time his brain is blown by Ae Ra's proximity and he gets all petty with jealousy I'm giggling.
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58 Tommygerrygal
June 6, 2017 at 10:51 AM
I'm thinking both of Park Shin-hye's dramas, Pinocchio and Doctors, also qualify.
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59 coolbeans
June 6, 2017 at 1:05 PM
Ohh yes this is definitely catnip for me too! Love it when the guy falls first! Reply 1997 and Weightlifting Fairy were the first shows that came to mind for me! Reply 1988 too, even though I was #TeamJungHwan (but I can never hate on the ever so cute Bogummie).
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60 GiveMeAngst
June 6, 2017 at 1:46 PM
My fav catnip of all! When the hero falls in love irrevocably and has to win her over. I can never get enough of his silliness or his love gestures. I just love how much the guy loves her. Grabs my heart every time and it never gets old. ???
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61 Rouny
June 6, 2017 at 2:39 PM
Totally my catnip ... which is one of the reasons The Greatest Love / Best Love is one of my favorite K-dramas. My favorite flavor of this kind of catnip is when the hero is a major jerk to the heroine at first, which makes his romantic comeuppance all the more sweet, especially after a long process of denial and foot-in-mouth.
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62 Vittoria
June 6, 2017 at 4:04 PM
I really, really love all the dramas that were mention so I guess this is my catnip too..
I love you girlfriday..ur so me!
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63 soulgirl012
June 6, 2017 at 4:14 PM
*thumb's up*
Thanks DBfamily for this segment! I thought it's neat by talking about certain catnip/theme, it also highlights/introduces the relevant k-dramas (previous catnip on reunited-lover got me to watch My Secret Romance).
I thought Jealousy Incarnate is like the golden drama illustrating jealousy, man's one sided love, and all the torture that comes with it.
Plus, it's so rare and precious when it's done so right, with the writing, directing, and acting --> Cho Jung Suk is love! <3
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64 merry
June 6, 2017 at 5:21 PM
This, i can relate...squee at the pursuit.
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65 theonewhofallsasleep
June 6, 2017 at 5:59 PM
Yes this! 100 times over this omg
Totally the reason why I loved strong woman and weightlifting fairy so much
Thank you girlfriday for articulating so well my love for dramas like this :)
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66 Tommygerrygal
June 6, 2017 at 7:30 PM
Then there was Ji Chang-wook in Empress Ki. He withstood a lot of hurt from Ha Ji Won's character because he liked her first.
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Sam
June 8, 2017 at 9:16 PM
haven't watched yet. thinking of watching it soon :) hope it's as good as i hope. is it sageuk?
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67 PanthomLights
June 6, 2017 at 7:53 PM
This definitely is a --- Catnip!!!
Him having those unrequited feelings, the jealousy overload and him doing everything (swoon-worthy and stupid) just to get the girl.. I will definitely die laughing and swooning and sqeeing and screaming all at once.. hahaha..
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68 gdansk19
June 6, 2017 at 8:15 PM
It's a tie between this and friends turned to lovers which is my greater catnip. Even better when they're combined....oh the deliciousness. Especially when it's all the quiet gestures and the looks that have the viewer totally aware of the feelings but the heroine is oblivious. It's a tease but the dawning awareness of feelings is worth the payoff....when done well of course.
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gumgum
June 7, 2017 at 11:19 PM
This combo is my favorite too, I hope someone writes about friends to lovers as a catnip!
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69 wakimary
June 6, 2017 at 11:26 PM
and here i thought @javabeans' reunited lovers was my ultimate catnip.but reading through this, nodding in agreement and seeing my favorite drama heroes (SIG & PHS), now I'm confused which is my ultimate catnip. thanks @girlfriday
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Sam
June 8, 2017 at 9:14 PM
ditto :)
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70 Kauaitone
June 7, 2017 at 1:46 AM
Don't forget Coffee Prince. He falls first, and it's magnificent! :)
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71 Bong Soons Tiny Fist
June 7, 2017 at 6:25 AM
I didn't even realize it until I read your article that this is my Dramaland Catnip too! It's like you were reading my mind. You were mentioned a bunch of dramas like Answer Me 1997, Jealously Incarnate, Weightlifting Fairy, and Strong Women Do Bong Soon and all of them are on my personal list of top kdramas. My favorite part is the jealousy that' bound to occur when the female leads attentions is directed at the second male lead and the angst he feels pining away for her.
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72 keke234
June 7, 2017 at 7:05 AM
Ditto to everything written! This is definitely catnip to me and I got hooked on many of the shows you mentioned for that reason. Which reminds me, I need to finish IHYV and start Jealousy Incarnate (was waiting for show and school to end nd so I never could binge-watch. ?
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73 Jangster
June 7, 2017 at 4:41 PM
Of the catnips so far, I like this the best - but it also depends on how the writer plays out the story. So far, Strong Woman Do Bong-soon did it the best because the writer wrote the story with the right touch. Does any other drama come close?
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74 pickledplumtree
June 7, 2017 at 6:16 PM
LOVE.
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75 blktibetanquartz
June 7, 2017 at 7:09 PM
The perfect editorial to describe why I loved Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok-ju and Strong Woman Do Bong-soon. The heroine did not recognize her own inner beauty and it took the perseverance of the hero to bring that beauty to the surface. Now that's a true soulmate!!! ;)
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76 whatis
June 7, 2017 at 9:20 PM
This is totally my catnip. When I need a simple adorable hero being adorably stupid with their crush without really realizing it, it's Falling for Innocence I reach for. Jung Kyung Ho is such a cutie pie.
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77 gumgum
June 7, 2017 at 11:15 PM
I agree with this so much!! Huhu Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok Joo touched my heart in a way I didn't think possible (late to Dramaland as this is my gateway series haha) and now whenever I watch a series I look for the moment the hero realizes he's fallen for the heroine, esp because they get that look in their eyes looking at the girl they're in love with. Just gets me all the time. Really heartbreaking when it's second lead syndrome though, and they watch from the sidelines but remain happy for their crush. You're all heroes too for loving unconditionally. HUHU SOBS
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78 lynnet
June 8, 2017 at 3:28 AM
I could never have expressed myself as clearly as girlfriday but this is definitely my catnip as well
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79 Sam
June 8, 2017 at 9:12 PM
i don't think suspicious partner counts, but yesterday's episode with all of Wook-ah's adorableness was refreshed while reading this :D
speaking of SLS, that have been too many for me already (although i'm no drama scholar yet ;) ) and i just realized it was because of this catnip exactly!
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80 Sam
June 8, 2017 at 9:32 PM
how about descendants of the sun?? i mean, Si Jin didn't exactly fall for Mo Yeon first, but the flirting and joking and the charms he turned on her were worth watching. and he got rejected three times, the poor thing... :D their love story wasn't like the one being discussed here, but what i remember and took away from that drama was more the light and fluffy amidst the serious situations than the lot of food for thought it provided.
also, on a completely different topic, another catnip is work/career related romance, besides the regular office romance that is. you know, when there is conflict between work and love or when both complement each other. i would love to read about something like that in dramaland. DOTS, Suspicious Partner, to-a-very-small-extent I Remember You, and others...
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81 reign
June 14, 2017 at 8:16 AM
I watched all mentioned except for Plus Nine Boys. Oh.... this is my catnip.
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82 javinne
June 16, 2017 at 1:00 AM
Park Hyung-shik! Oh my God... I loved him so much. And I hear your voice is my best show ever, my favorite.
So, yes, i have to agree with this catnip. I had never paid so much attention before, but yes, I suppose in most K-dramas the girl falls first... I have not really made any statictis, even from the bunch of drama I have watched, but it is interesting... I wonder if it shows something particular of collective behavior of Koreans.... Is it like part of their culture??
Anyway...
I am with you in this catnip, Girlfriday... thanks for your contribution.
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83 shanifah
June 16, 2017 at 3:24 AM
This is my catnip. I loved Answer Me 1997, I Hear Your Voice, & Twenty Again.
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84 Kcan
June 17, 2017 at 2:19 PM
Definitely hero falls for heroine first is my catnip! Doesn't every girl want to be pursued? Instead of us doing the chasing?
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85 toramona
July 17, 2017 at 5:19 PM
Major Catnip! Thank you Girlfriday! ::claps::
I love this catnip for all the reasons mentioned in the post but there's one more reason I love it...I adore my heroines.
Whether she's funny, quiet, spunky, loud, brash, cute, hardworking, confusing or a million other traits. Sometimes I love them at "first episode" while other times it's a process of growing affection with each episodes. The hero falling first means we're watching the heroine and loving the same things about her at the same time. <3 I'm thinking isn't it cool that she _fill in blank__ and then the hero says he think it's awesome too. YES! I love our simultaneous love fest.
This applies somewhat the opposite direction heronine to hero but there's just a different satisfaction when the hero falls first.
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86 Mermaid in Diguise
January 17, 2018 at 4:59 PM
I totally agree with this!
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87 Aaaaaa
February 8, 2018 at 12:40 PM
You should mention "uncontrollably fond". The male lead loved the female lead first and it didn't help that she was in love with someone else. Sad but great because he was jealous as hell.
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