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[2017 Year in Review] In search of my inner badass


Father Is Strange

By @isthatacorner

This year I needed a hero. Not to come save me. I can do that myself, thanks. But a hero to remind me that I can do that myself. I decided to quit a decent job—that I was miserable in—and take my years of experience, and enthusiasm, and life savings and move to a different state and start over. We only get this one life after all. And I failed. Spectacularly. There were tears. There were rants. And through it all… there were dramas (and Beanies).

This year in dramas I saw myself. I saw myself the way that I am (the miserable woman in Episode 1) and the person that I wanted to be (the happy and successful woman at the end of the drama). In a way, I was like Desi in the book I Believe in a Thing Called Love by Maurene Goo. I wanted to analyze dramas and see how these women managed to find success.

Of course, all of my plans go awry. So instead of hammering out a plan, I wanted to adopt an attitude.


Witch’s Court

I wanted to be like Lee Yuri in Father Is Strange. Bold and fearless. Even when I had no idea what I was doing. Or Ma Yi-deum of Witch’s Court. Dramaland threw an unreasonable amount of nonsense at the character (and shortchanged the viewers on the romance *grumble, grumble*), but Ma Yi-deum never gave up. She broke down when she needed to. She cried when it was necessary. And she picked herself up, dusted herself off, and kept going while telling everyone that she was MA YI-DEUM.

My dreams felt simple. My goals seemed obtainable. I had the experience. I had the degree. I had saved enough money (or I thought). And yet, the harder I tried and the faster I ran, the further and further my goals seemed to be from me. Some dramas come at the right time. Maybe they are great. Maybe they aren’t. But for you? For that specific moment in time? They are perfect. That drama—and that hero—for me was Choi Ae-ra in Fight My Way. Choi Ae-ra wanted to be an announcer. It didn’t matter how hard she worked or how hard she ran; it didn’t pan out. A line of hers that hit me and never let go was:

“Even though we woke up earlier than others, even though we went to bed later than others, we never had time. We lived harder than anyone, but because a resumé that doesn’t know anything seems to pretend to know all of me, I’m angry, I’m frustrated.”


Fight My Way

And that was followed by her declaration that she has the right to choose how much she’s going to be hurt. From Choi Ae-ra I learned that sometimes dreams don’t come in the shape that we anticipate them. Sometimes they have to change, or we have to change to accept a new dream and learn that the new dream is just as good as the old one. That it’s okay to have a new dream (I learned a lot from Seol-hee as well). As I was preparing to chase after a dream, I watched the friends in Fight My Way, and when I failed spectacularly, I had already seen what that looks like and that more importantly, there is something on the other side of that failure to hold on to.

Chicago Typewriter showed me that there are some dreams worth dying for. While I hope I’m never called on to die for early childhood literacy or the public’s right to read (and I’m pretty sure if I were called on to die for these things it would be a hard pass from me), Chicago Typewriter showed me persistence and perseverance and being brave. Chicago Typewriter showed me love and friendship that lasts more than one lifetime, that are worth fighting for. They showed me that no matter how bleak things seem—like being surrounded by the enemy with only one gun and shooting your friend in the head because it’s the right thing to do—things do get better, even if I’m crying in my empty apartment or writing a rant on the fanwall.

And finally, Because This Life Is Our First taught me that this is my first life. I’ve never been this age in this situation before. All in all, I’m doing all right, things could be worse, and I shouldn’t be so hard on myself. This is my first life and I’m doing the best I can.

I needed a hero this year. Dramaland gave me… me. And a whole lot of badass women along the way. (And I totally promise to watch Forest of Secrets. One day. It’s on the list.)

 
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Song ji-won for me! XD

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I think we all aspire to be Song sunbae ~ 😑😊💃🏻

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*didnt meant the 😑 face...

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Enjoy the next year. It's going to be alright. No, it's going to be perfect.

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YES! Fantastic write up. Dramas were my gateway to understanding people, learning how to handle uncertainties and strength to carry on.

Because even if it's fiction, it reflects realities, and I wanna be that awesome badass at the end of the story.

That's why I absolutely adored Fight My Way even when some others might beg to differ. And Because This Is My First Life is always a precious gem. (Don't forget Ssong in Age of Youth too.) (And Ma YiDeum was such a breath of fresh air, making me simutaneously gape and awe, pfft.)

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What an amazing submission, @isthatacorner! What you said about dramas being perfect for some moments of your life is so accurate. There are tons of dramas (and books! I see you read YA!) that I know aren't objectively perfect but my heart deems them perfect because it was the right story at the right time. Sometimes the Universe is giving like that.

And I hope 2018 pans out beautifully for you and if not (sincerely wishing this wouldn't be the case), you'll always have fellow beanies for a support group.

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"And yet, the harder I tried and the faster I ran, the further and further my goals seemed to be from me."

This was such a magnificent read! I'm also struggling with the weight of the adult world right now and dramas really did encourage me to go on. Whenever the world's too much for me to bear, I watch these incredible men and women fight so hard for their dreams and beliefs and somehow I get the courage to stand up and try to fight for my place in this cruel world. And yes I do agree that our chapters have just begun and while there are still lots of obstacles to overcome, we will certainly and most definitely be okay. Hugs from me to you! ♥

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this was just lovely. thank you @isthatacorner for writing this. 2018 will surely be better.hwaiting!
2017 gave us a lot of badass female characters which I'm thankful for. suji was my favourite this year.

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This gave me the feels. 😢 2017 was like that for me too with a few months of being homeless thrown in. Really beautiful post. I hope 2018 brings you all the good things you couldn't get this year and more. Fighting!✊

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Fighting! Life is an adventure, whatever happens, shit may come your way - I used to take it real hard when I failed because everyone judges you based on that. But at some point I realized I shouldn´t let anyone else live my life for me, I have learned to enjoy failure, because success is more terrifying. Public attention is the scariest. After all my experience, being in the bottom (or underground) is safer, cause the top layer goes first in times of crisis. That does not mean bottom layer is less badass. Top layer only knows how to float, it doesn´t know how to dive, unable to leave their comfort zone. Unlike us, who are always "in the zone" whatever we´re thrown into.

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True dat! Couldn't have said it any better. Plus being at the top, people are less understanding of your mistakes. You have to remain flawless, top-of-the-game all.the.damn.time! Its certainly a different kind of pressure.

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This was such a nice write-up @isthatacorner
I left Fight My Way cuz I was in a drama slump at that point- incapable almost of loving any but this makes me want to pick it back up!

Hope next year is much better than you and the hero in you <3

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I totally agree with your thoughts on Fight My Way. I loved how it showed that life is no fairytale, no matter how hard you work, sometimes you're just bound to fail. I've had lots of those thoughts as well, why is it just not working out for me? Will this keep going on? Will my life just be a failure?
But Fight My Way showed me, even if you fail, keep going and look for that other door that brings you to a place that you didn't imagine, but that might just be as amazing. With a little bit of flexibility, you can find a dream that truly belongs to you. Although I haven't found mine yet, Fight My Way gave me faith, told me not to give up, and I'm looking positive into the future now, even if I don't know what it will bring yet. But I'm sure I'll find my door sooner or later.

Fight My Way is really precious to me, and I hope we'll see more dramas of this kind in the future.

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This is an amazing write-up! Thanks for sharing. Don't lose hope and/or say you failed, just yet. Its been less than a year since you moved - and eventually, you'll find your footing. Its just taking longer than you expected.

That's what I tell myself as well. Your post/philosophy is very encouraging for me, as I'm struggling in the absence of a clear job and/or direction in life. *hugs* and many thanks for the positivity.

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So inspiring!! Thank you so much for this! I didn't know I needed this....*Love.

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DAEBAK really loved this a lot. ☺️

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You have dramas, you have DB and you have us, your dearest Beanies. FIGHTING for 2018! It's okay to make mistakes Because this is Our First Life <3 <3 <3

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Lovely

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Wow, this about made me cry I related to it so much. Amazing. Thank you so much for sharing. :)

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Thank you for this post. Choi Ae ra had the same effect on me too. I related so much with all the bad breaks that she was getting, knowing that she was too good for that. What Dong man told her to encourage her though about wherever she loves being is also the big league became a sort of personal mantra that gave me validation for the choices that I made. @isthatacorner, thanks again for the post and I wish you all the best for 2018.

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Beautiful essay and I agree with everything. 2017 was hard for me but I'm soo grateful that this year Kdramas introduced alot of strong and relatable heroines. And I felt like every story of theirs was just a reminder that no matter how hard life is, just keep going and it'll get better. Here's to a better 2018. <3

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That was great. Congratulations on the new job too.

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As Yoda said in the recent Star Wars film (forgive me, I'm still on a Last Jedi-Reylo high), "Failure, the greatest teacher is."

I'm glad that you were able to find your inner badass @isthatacorner . Though we have friends and family to support us during trying times, the strength we need to overcome life's adversity should always come and start from within.

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Thank you so much for your analysis! It definitely gave me new insights :D

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It sounds like you’ve learned so much from your experiences this year, and hopefully, your dreams will be reality in 2018! And here’s to badass females! (Suji in “Lookout” I would add too. The character and the actress playing her are both amazing!)

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@isthatacorner I really enjoyed reading your article! I hope that your new job goes well and 2018 is a fantastic year. Hwaiting!

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Thank you for this article ~ I really need to remember this, that I am the hero of my own life. I’m in the middle of moving states and looking for a job after getting my degree, and caught between what is easy and what is my dream.

Thanks for reminding me of all the lessons I’ve learned this year from Dramaland, that the underdogs can be beaten but what makes them great, what makes them heroes, is getting back up, even when it’s hard.

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yasssss! @isthatacorner thank you for this beautiful piece. let this be a reminder to all of us who are in search of our own inner badass. we may make mistakes and do stupid things because this is all our first lives but in the end everything will pass and everything will be okay. if it is not okay, you simply have not reached the end. may we all have the strength to continue on to the very end, no matter how long it takes.

and may we all be bold and fearless in the face of adversity like Lee Yuri (Father is Strange)... with faking injury mother-in-laws and birth secrets and all big things and little things in between.

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5/5 stars submission! Thank you, @isthatacorner!
Merry Christmas to you!!!!

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@isthatacorner: Isa, no wonder! All the best to you!
Please check out Forest of Secrets on days you feel too negative, cos no matter how dark it is, I found hope!

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This is literally me, right now. The only thought that comes to mind is that the difference between winners and losers (I have SUCH issues with this word-- but its how the quote goes) is that winners get up one more time than they fall down. So...dude. we just have to keep getting up no matter how many things get tossed our way. I'm going to work on learning how to duck and maybe look ahead a bit. Maybe I can avoid some of the nonsense!

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