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[2019 Year in Review] Watching, reflecting, and coming to terms with my fear


Hell Is Other People

By Waadmay

Note: This post contains spoilers for Hell Is Other People and Be Melodramatic.

My utmost fear is of going insane: losing touch with what’s around me, abandoning common sense, and throwing all logical thinking out the window. In every possible scenario I’ve imagined, this could only happen due to an accident or an illness that might cause brain damage. Never in my wildest dreams had I thought I would love a drama that speaks to my worst nightmares until this year came and brought me not just one, but two such dramas in Hell Is Other People and Be Melodramatic.

While thinking about the fears which these dramas had portrayed, I was quite surprised by how different my reaction was to each of them.


Hell Is Other People

My fear poked its head out in Hell Is Other People as the hero puppy Jong-woo started going bonkers. Watching this happen got me angry, frustrated, scared–and sad for him. To make matters worse, he was losing his mind due to internal and external reasons that didn’t involve accidents or illness.

His nightmare started due to the stress from dealing with moving to an unfamiliar environment far from the warmth of his home and family. At the start of the drama, Jong-woo was just beginning a new job, but it was at the expense of his dream of becoming a novelist. A lack of support from friends and loved ones, as well as financial insecurity, prevented him from living in decent accommodation. Instead, he moved into a rundown goshiwon that put him in the grasp of a bunch of psychopath killers who wanted either to kill and feed on him, or were aiming to make him their “masterpiece” (I really hate you for this Moon-jo).

All of this was portrayed in a beautiful yet scary way as Jong-woo was locked up in his own mind, a space that ended up being smaller than his tiny rented room in the goshiwon from hell. In that small space, when faced with a choice between life and death, instead of reaching for help, he just lost it. Jong-woo ultimately went crazy and killed those psychopaths in a frenzied haze and turned into a psychopath himself.


Hell Is Other People

I wanted badly to do something to help save him, yell at his girlfriend or even his treacherous friend to pay attention to what he was saying. I wanted to help him out of that hell, but obviously I couldn’t do a thing and he was lost. Witnessing this unfold on my screen was heart-wrenching and painful because of the what ifs. What if he had headed home to the safety of his loving mom? What if his girlfriend hadn’t been too stressed out and absorbed in her own problems and listened to him? Really listened and gave him the support he needed to move out of that place?

I noticed that the same fear I experienced in Hell Is Other People was present in another one of my favorite dramas, Be Melodramatic. I bet it’s surprising that a rom-com would give someone a fright, but as I said earlier, the idea of going crazy is pretty scary to me. And yet, my reaction to the same concept was different this time.


Be Melodramatic

Here, instead of being scared and anxious, I felt compassion. While watching Eun-jung hallucinate and converse with her dead husband, I felt a sense of understanding and acceptance. Most times those scenes made me to tear up, and I watched while wishing I could give her a hug. I would probably have reacted the same if I were in her shoes.

The scene where she watched the footage of herself talking to no one was very difficult to witness. The realization that she truly was alone and not with her beloved husband finally prompted her to deal with her mental and emotional problems fully. It all started by asking for a hug from her brother and friends; all of them had been waiting patiently for her to open up and get out from the small space she had created for herself as a way to hide from her grief. That turning point made me cry and it also made me forget about my fear of losing my sanity; I ended up focusing on how much I empathized with her loss.


Be Melodramatic

In comparing the two characters, I can see that Jong-woo was getting more closed off by the minute–to the point that he wasn’t able recognize a hand extended in the spirit of help (bless your soul, Officer So Jung-hwa). On the other hand, Eun-jung was able to see and take the outstretched hands that were waiting to help her get out from the cell she imprisoned herself in.

So while going crazy is still my biggest fear, by comparing these two dramas and my reactions to each of them, I can safely say that I faced what I consider to be the source of my terror. I’m still scared of being thrown into the same situation as Jong-woo, one that might drive me to close up in my own head, left to face my own demons all alone. But I’m no longer as scared as I once was of losing my mind because of an accident, illness, or bereavement. I have what Eun-jung has: a loving support system.


Be Melodramatic

 
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Happy New Year @waadmay and my lovely beanies β™₯️

Here’s to courage, bravery, facing our fears and most importantly, to supporting one another in the next year!

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Here here , hopefully we'll do that always and forever
Thanks @choijunu

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And happy new year , wish you health and happiness

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A great write-up , Waadmay ! Thanks for sharing your personal story and thoughts. I'm glad you have a new perspective. Realizing and willing to ask for help is already a great step !

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Thanks @halfmoon 😊

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Happy New Year wish you all the best πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰

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Congratulations on being published @waadmay. This is such a brave and personal piece, I love every word of it. I'm so happy it got published and what perfect not to end out 2019.

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"what a perfect note" is what that would read if I could type.

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It's okay , stay safe *hugs*
πŸ’œπŸ’œβ™₯️β™₯οΈπŸ’™πŸ’™πŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’›πŸ’›

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Thank you so much , you helped me a lot @leetennant

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Congratulations 🎊🎊🎊
μΆ•ν•˜ν•΄μš”,
Uri May!
So happy your personal piece got published. I never thought HIOP could bring out something like this, I'm so proud of you.
Cheers πŸ₯‚ to you and your loving support system.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

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Thanks @maybemaknae 😊😊
Yes you should watch it and watch The Guest too if you didn't see it yet
Cheers πŸ₯‚ and happy new year , hope you get what you want and more in 2020

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πŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’š
Guest will be the first horror one I watch after I Steel myself with non rom coms & thrillers!

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Yay you're smart , I love you πŸ’–πŸ’πŸ’œπŸ’š

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Love you too πŸ’šβ€οΈπŸ’š

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Yay! May! I was wondering who would be published at the 11th hour. I’ve not had exactly the same fear as you but I do fear losing my memory, not being able to remember my loved ones, my training, my profession, which also leads to losing your mind. However, what gives me hope is that I have people that love me who will see me through it should it happen. And I’ll be none the wiser. Thank you for sharing your fears. May we be able to overcome all our apprehensions in 2020! Happy New Year, May!

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Hopefully we will @ally-le , thanks and happy new year πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰
Glad you have a great support system , love you stay safe and healthy β™₯οΈπŸ’œπŸ’™πŸ’šπŸ’›β€οΈπŸ’–

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May!!! Happy New year and congratulations on being published @waadmay

Those scenes in Be Melodramatic were such a heart-breaking watch and - like you - I loved the moment when she reached out to other people. I also loved that her friends had waited for her to do so, never forced her to do anything but were there for her when she was ready to find that support. True friendship.

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Happy New Year @cloggie πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰
Thanks I thought it wouldn't be published , how's the book going on ???
I missed talking to you , you should probably watch HIOP by the way πŸ˜‰πŸ˜‰β€οΈπŸ’›πŸ’šπŸ’™πŸ’œβ™₯οΈπŸ’–

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Book is going well - June is still one of the characters πŸ˜‰πŸ˜‰πŸ˜‰

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Great hopefully you will finish soon , yay glad she's still alive πŸ˜ŠπŸ˜ŠπŸ˜ŠπŸ’›β™₯οΈβ€οΈπŸ’™πŸ’šπŸ’œ

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Congratulations on being published @waadmay! This is such a brave and interesting piece of writing, and I'm glad you let it out into the world.

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Thanks @egads , I love you ***Hugs***
Happy New Year , it's all thanks to you @leetennant and @oppafangirl since you helped me sort my thoughts out better πŸ’œβ™₯οΈπŸ’™πŸ’šπŸ’›β€οΈπŸ’–πŸ’πŸ–€

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This is amazing, Wa'ad!!
*sends all the hugs and love*

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Thanks @rukia , glad you liked it 😊
Love you too , so much β™₯οΈβ€οΈπŸ’›πŸ’šπŸ’™πŸ’–πŸ’πŸ’œ
Happy New Year πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰

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❀️

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Congratulations @waadmay! Thank you for sharing your story.

Happy new year to you and your loving support system!!! πŸ’œ

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Thanks @katakwasabi and you're welcome πŸ˜ŠπŸ˜‰
If I didn't share with you , with whom would like I share then πŸ˜‰πŸ˜˜
Happy New Year to you too , wish you all the best πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰ and that you attend one of SSR's plays

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This is amazing waad! Congrats on getting published and for facing your fears.

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Thanks @superwhopotterlock , glad you liked it πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ
Happy New Year πŸŽ‰ πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰ , may the new year be better and gentler to you my amazing @superwhopotterlock , love you β™₯οΈβ€οΈπŸ’›πŸ’πŸ’–πŸ’™πŸ’šπŸ’œπŸ’œ

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Congratulations may!!! I'm so happy your write-up got published before the end of the year!
I'm so so glad Eun-jung is able to reach out to her loved ones and is starting to heal. This was a big part of the reason why I couldn't finish Melo Suits Me, I was too overwhelmed and scared for Eun- Jung. From my experience, it is very hard for the person to recognise they are ill and need help and harder for the loved ones to try and reach them.
I'm very relieved Eun Jung is going to be ok with her support system. Hopefully I will finish Melo Suits Me
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Hell is other people - I don't think I can do it! Just looking at the screenshots creeped me out, the fact he isn't saved, and loses himself is just too much for me to watch.

I hope 2020 gives us the chance to be brave, listen to one another and help pull someone else or ourselves into the light! Happy New Year β€πŸ§‘πŸ’›πŸ’šπŸ’™πŸ’œ

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Thanks @ayaan , glad it might help you to finish melo 😊😊
I hope the same for you in the new year and happy new year πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰
Love you πŸ’œπŸ’šπŸ’™πŸ’›β™₯οΈβ€οΈπŸ’–πŸ’
I know it might be hard to watch HIOP but I believe that you should watch it after watching The Guest to be more mentally prepared 😁

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Congrats on being published @waadmay! I didn’t watch either of these these shows, but a similar kind of fear was also addressed in PEGASUS MARKET. I didn’t expect a β€œsilly” show to be so deep, but it was, and it hit me in the gut.

I’m glad you have a loving support system to help you. 😘😘 Happy New Year!

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Thanks @wishfultoki 😊😊
It's on my watch list , I'm very thankful for this too
Happy New Year πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰ , wish all the best you and your loved ones πŸ’šπŸ’œπŸ’™πŸ’šπŸ’œπŸ’™

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May, you got published! πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰What a good new year! Hugs hugs! You already know how much I like this article. Also i was really sad that it was not there till last minute, but now i am all really happy.
All the best may! Fighting !!!

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Thanks @oppafangirl , yeah it seems like that **hugs** πŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’›πŸ’›πŸ’›πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ’œ
Yes I know , glad you're happy
I love you πŸ’šπŸ’›πŸ’œβ™₯οΈπŸ’πŸ’™
Happy New Year πŸŽ‰ πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰
Hope you have a great and prosperous one

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Congratulations on being published @waadmay! I can't read more than the first and the last paragraphs because I am about to start Be Melodramatic. But from what I gather, this seems to be an incredibly brave write-up and I am glad that you managed to face your fears. Hoping you can overcome them entirely and that 2020 brings you more inspiration from dramas or otherwise :)

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Thanks @obsessedmuch , you can read it later after finishing melo and yay for watching melo πŸ˜ŠπŸ˜‰
Happy New Year πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰ , wish you the same , missed you so much πŸ’›πŸ’™πŸ’šπŸ’œπŸ’›πŸ’™πŸ’šπŸ’œπŸ’›πŸ’™πŸ’šπŸ’œπŸ’πŸ’πŸ’β™₯️β™₯️β™₯οΈπŸ’–πŸ’–πŸ’–

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Great post. I know I'm never watching Hell is Other People....too scary and dark, but I do want to take the time to watch Melo this year.
I've pretty much already been spoiled to it but that is a good thing. One of the reasons I want to watch it is that it seems like they take the time to deal with grief and how heavy it is on a person in a careful, honest, and respectful way, but this is also why I've been hesitant. But overall it sounds like a healing drama.

I like how you pointed out that sometimes just being the person who is interested and listening can really help someone.

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Thanks @bcampbell1662 you really should watch it and don't hesitate , it will make tug at your heart and make tear up or cry at a minute and the next minute you'll be laughing so hard you're going to get tears in your eyes.
Happy New Year πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸ’œπŸ’šπŸ’›

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