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Open Thread #675

Happy Friday everyone!

Here is your Open Thread, which is here for you to chat about anything you want, whether it be drama-related or not. Nothing’s off-topic here! Spoilers may be rife, so proceed accordingly.

 
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Little Boy - 1015k 1st week October

1075k - 19 October. Momentum still is strong.

What a fall in Gold n Silver. as analysed and expected. Inflated balloons always fall flat.
Everything needs money. especially politics. that's y u hardly see common man fighting, being elected as representatives.Very few r elected n most ride on a wave of an event. That's how things works
Business n politics r partners n when religion joins the party - It becomes one heck of a combination. A combi that can eliminate, annihilate, destroy anyone that comes into its path.
I like the combi of 3 n its a fact all 3 work together. Mostly 2 combis are infront its either B-C or C-R n 3rd gives tactical support.
That's why i call politics is life, it exposes real human nature, character as well social structure. All makeup is washed up and you see the real face, full of pimples, freckles and wrinkles.

Parties and candidates spending Millions n millions just to serve the people. Yeah. Those who believe in this trashtalk deserve the governments they get. How naive and gullible u have 2 b 2 fall 4 such scam. Those funds come from where? How? when?

Only if we get to see many more XI and Putin - World will become far more chaotic as well as entertaining.

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I'm not much fond of human beings so never get much personally involved with them. That's why i have clean profile.
The less you engage with others, the less troubles, issues, problems you face or get involved into. And that's how you get into least of Physical security risk or any physical danger. You don't need to be diplomatic with others, no need to have fake smiles, fake courtesy, fake kindness. No need to lie. All -ve attributes and actions are automatically eliminated.

2019 - We had talk about preparing food and there i had mentioned that i spend hours preparing food and then not even eat it. The best i ever gave to my own prepared dish was a score of 7. yes. If you can be strict with yourself then you can be strict with anyone or anything. Same rules for all. No favouritism.

Hungry > Prepare Food( to acquire 2k calories burned 1k calories) > food is not upto expectations > It lacks that perfection > Trash? that is wastage of resouces ( Born - u r taught resources r limited, never waste food, grow up - geography class - this n that resources - limited, move one business class - resources r limited, Law - resources r limited)

Resources are limited and Proper utilisation of resources. Enough to make you practical. That's where last weeks view comes from.

Now what to do with this prepared food?
Find the one who can consume it > family member > pet > stray animal > neighbour > homeless people.
Most of the time family is there for the rescue.
If not then you just have to find any homeless human being
For a Facemask - wow such kindness, such nice and generous act. Facemasks revel in it and thankfully i don;t engage with such facemasks b/c for these identities even habitual and performative action is Kindess. And then you expect human world to be a better place. As i said earlier even those leaders at top are far better than these Facemasks.

But for me - I know intentions behind the act are malicious, so this isn't a +ve or good act but sheer wastage of resources.
To get 2k i lost 1k+calories+resources and then have to burn more resources to get those required Calories.
Mother Earth has every right to punish me.

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How was 2020 US wildfires going?

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washington and oregon got a huge dump of rainfall FINALLY yesterday which should've put out the last of the wildfires... but now worries of mudslides in the scorched areas of forest...

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Still have two burning in my area, though it was wonderful to have the rain.

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But my county in Washington still has a burn ban, even though as you said, the rain poured from the sky.

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Happy weekend Beanies and keep Beaning On!

Time is a scary thing Beanies. A month ago I announced my hiatus because warrior friend facing death was the final straw…as of this week she is recovering back home in between her hospital check-ups!💪🥳 She also left me a message that she got my letter, but communication is too much for her to handle at the moment. For that reason her parents informed everyone that they would only communicate important changes from now on in order to let her rest properly.

I am relieved that she is doing better and that keeping in touch is not a priority to her right now, because I have not been able to do much on that front. I do plan to continue writing letters to her every two weeks, maybe with some self-made cards once in a while. Dad finally got his cortisone injection yesterday and his next appointment is scheduled for late October already. He should be more or less back to normal in two weeks, but at least now the treatment can do its job.

My loved ones are not the only ones who are doing a lot better. My job exams ended yesterday and that combined with my loved ones recovering did wonders for my mental health.😇 I hereby officially declare that my hiatus has ended a week earlier than originally predicted!🥳 I immediately started catching up on the less pleasant stuff like cleaning and paperwork yesterday, and today I get to do the fun Beanie stuff, like reading the unread Dramabeans articles and writing for the Open Thread and What We Are Watching posts this weekend!😆

Tomorrow my sister is coming over with my godsiblings to celebrate mom’s birthday and this Sunday my best friend is crossing the country to visit me and escape her tiny apartment for a bit. Our goal was to go for walks in my neighborhood or hang out in my garden, but the bad weather forecast will probably force us inside under strict corona guidelines. If, despite the bad weather, everything works out well, we might turn this into a regular thing from now on.🙏 Video chatting every weekend is nice, but seeing each other in the flesh is priceless.❤️

Meeting up also means skipping a few video chats and replacing them with K-drama episodes!😆From this evening onwards we should be able to watch 2-3 episodes of Reply 1988 together every weekend. I would like to watch something else with Beanies on weekdays, but a total of 8 airing/premiering shows in September-October caught my interest.😂 I also expect feedback for all the job interviews in October, so if I get hired somewhere there won’t be much time left to start anything else!🙏

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Lots of good news to read finally! YEAH!!! Now have a good time with your sister and best friend.
I highly recommend writing letters. It is nice and doesn't take energy for her to read. Who doesn't like to get letters in the mail anymore?
You deserve some good time to take care of yourself.

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Thank you, I wrote her a letter after posting on OT!😀

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Welcome back 🥳🥳

I'm so glad to hear that your friend is on the mend, and that your Dad has gotten the treatment he needs. Congratulations also on finishing the exams and for the boost to your mental health!! I hope everything keeps going well and that db will be a source of comfort if and when you need it!

ALL THE BEST FOR THE JOB HUNT!! I just got a job myself (thank god!) and I understand how tiring the whole process is. Rooting for you! Have an incredible weekend, you deserve it ❤️

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Thank you for your understanding and best wishes! A belated congratulations on your job!😀

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@turtuallysarcastic Such wonderful news!

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Yes it is !😀

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I'm so glad that your loved ones are recovering. People you care about falling ill is something that can deeply affect even the strongest of people.

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You are absolutely right about that! I hope your dad and family can remain healthy!

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i am so happy that things are looking up for you :) i hope you have a great time celebrating your mom's birthday with your family and enjoy seeing your family and friends! keep me updated on reply 1988!!

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Thank you! I plan to tag you in every Reply 1988 post until you get sick of me!😀

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trust me, that will NEVER HAPPEN. i finished the show in january and still watch clips almost everyday when they show up on my ig feed HAHA

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This makes me so happy! Glad you're feeling better and everyone is getting better around you!

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Thank you Ally!😀

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Great news! Good luck with the job hunt, and in the meanwhile, have a nice time at Dramaland! 👏👏👏💚

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Thank you, it is nice to come home to you all!😀

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Good news, I see! Have good time with your sister and your best friend!

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Thank you, we will have fun!😀

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congrats on your friend! thank goodness for small favors. may she recover swiftly. also happy about your father! sorry that it seems like there's been so much health turmoil.

sounds like things are looking up. tough times, but this is the shit that makes life worth living! hope you get hired, too!!!!!

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Thank you for the encouragement, and good things for you too!😀

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So glad to hear that things are getting better

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Thank you, enjoy Slumpland!👍

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SO much good news! Congrats on finishing the exams and your friend being able to feel better. Also Happy Birthday to your mom.

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Thank you! If they piled up the bad news a few weeks ago, it is only fair to pile up the good news now!😀

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This is a happy post! So glad that it's full of good news! :-)

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So am I, thank you for sharing the joy!😀

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Happy Friday everyone! I hope the week has treated everyone well ❤️ If anyone is in need of a pick-up, here's my song of the week: Me to You, You to Me by our beloved Mido and Falasol: https://youtu.be/tLGHKyZs0Gk

My anecdote for the week is that I spent the last couple of days making this traditional jam that's a real favourite for many people in Singapore (where I'm from) and Malaysia. It's called kaya, and it's made with eggs, coconut milk and screwpine (pandan) leaves. My boyfriend loves kaya, but no one really makes it at home nowadays because it's really labour intensive. I wanted to make some from scratch for his birthday though, thus the recipe testing!

I squeezed the coconut milk from fresh coconut from the market and juiced fresh pandan leaves instead of using the bottled extract. It was pretty worth it! The end product was a jam that was really fragrant and fresh, much nicer than the bottled stuff. My wrist is really sore from all the stirring though 😂 For two small jars of kaya, I was standing at my stove and stirring the jam over a bain-marie for an hour and a half. Sounds mad, I know, but I kind of enjoyed being in the kitchen after such a long time away!

As always, stay healthy and safe and take care of yourselves!

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@choijunu Happy Friday to you as well :)

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Thank you ❤️ I hope you have a great weekend, @sirena!

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@choijunu You are very welcome, and thank you :)

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Wow, that's a lot of work. I actually bought kaya when I was in SG early last year, there's still quite a few left xD

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It was simple, but tedious. Definitely not a recipe I'm going to be making often 😂 What kind of kaya did you buy?

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I bought it at a supermarket and asked someone which brand they recommend xD

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I remember in one of the Episodes of Coffee friends, someone made this jam!

Sometimes making something (even labour intensive) for yourself or your loved ones is worth the effort.

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THAT'S where i remember hearing of this jam! thanks, it was going to bother me all day/night...
: D

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I made it a couple of times using the Pandan extract. Fresh leaves almost impossible to find here in Phoenix. But lots of work as you noted, so now I just buy it from Amazon.

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we can find them frozen at SE asian markets here in seattle. i used it to make a coconut cream that is used on grilled corn on the cob... was a thai or vietnamese recipe i think.

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frozen pandan leaves, that is...

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@windsun33 @spazmo Funnily enough, in Singapore the extract is more expensive than the leaves. A packet of pandan leaves is about 60 cents at the supermarket. Sometimes, when we steam rice, we chuck in some pandan leaves for fragrance too!

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sounds good! and you are so sweet for making it for him!

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I hope he enjoys it 🥳

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I saw a recipe before to use coconut cream to cut cooking time. (Coffee Friends' impact that's why I search for it too)

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https://www.hancinema.net/ratings-last-episode-of-flower-of-evil-recorded-its-highest-ratings-145411.html

Wow... since I'm dropped already from this show after episode 5, for all the fans of FoE, it became one of the most successful TvN shows of 2020 and it was the highest rating ever. I wish my next good luck and see you for Moon Chae-won and Lee Joon-gi for our next drama/s in the near future either by collaboration or in good separation.

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it was so good and kept me sweating it til the end! and oh my gosh was their daughter cute and a good little actress!

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So, there's an on going pandemic and everyone is eager to protect themselves. Except my family. Not only are they going to church with more than 500 members every week (without mask since they all know each other and there aren't too many cases in their city 🤦🏻‍♀️). Now this weekend the whole family is together for the whole weekend. And by whole family I mean my parents, their children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. We are almost 100 people in our family. And as much as I love my family and would love to spend the weekend with them, is it necessary to take this risk? I'm actually the only one who won't come to this get-together and my family doesn't even understand why. It's harder to argue about all this with close people and I'm just really tired of arguing with family again. So I guess I just needed a place to rant about this. Anyway, happy weekend, beanies! I will enjoy my weekend alone in my safe place 😄

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Enjoy your weekend. Treat yourself with something that makes you happy.

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A few in our family have come to the conclusion that masks have helped keep us healthy from colds this summer, another benefit. I always wear it when out. I was very surprised to see a friend's wedding pics and only two people had on masks. Yes, it was outdoors, but the chairs were not distanced and the food was indoors with seating along buffet tables. This morning I am watching RBG memorial on local tv channel and everyone has on masks and chairs are distanced. Very tasteful, very moving. RIP to a great woman.

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I'm actually such a big fan of masks. It's such an easy solution and way to protect oneself, why wouldn't someone wear it?

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Not only are you protecting yourself, you are also protecting others in case you do carry anything. It's a win win situation really...

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Dear Unni, I think I would be one of your family members joining the party, if I were part of the family! 😆
I don't know if you could understand me...
I actually am going to France to visit my brother, wife and children for this next two weeks vacations I have. In order to take advantage of the still yet nice weather, and I know I have heard France is again rising their co...d-19 peak... I know the news there are somehow alarming, but Ottokke??? I really miss my family from there, I have been absolutely sad about moving to the suburbs around Koln, and I feel I will die but of solitude.
So... I will travel even within the ongoing pandemic. I will take care of myself the best I can... and that's the much I can do....
Apart from this, how are you doing??? Nice to find you here...
Please, watch Brahms, I think you will love it.... 😅

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Hi Javinne, stay safe as good as possible and enjoy your time with your family! By the way, how is your father doing?

I love Brahms! It's the only drama I really enjoy at the moment. This week I was listening a lot to Rachmaninoff, since the last two episodes reminded me how much I like his piano pieces 😊

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I had the privilege of listening to the Rachmaninoff's piano concert 2 live, played by a wonderful and exquisite famous pianist, Gabriela Montero.
I really love that concert, probably even more than the Emperor's concert from Beethoven, and you know Beethoven is my favorite musician of all times...
But so much I love Rachmaninoff too!
That concert is a masterpiece with no waste.

My dad is recovering. What is horrible is our debts... at the end having him getting the surgery in Venezuela was even more expensive than what it would have been in Germany ir USA...
We will spend years paying.
Anyway... I should not complain about that... he is recovering. I am glad...
Thanks for asking. 😇

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Rant away. My parents, sister and I are very careful; We haven't seen my sister and her kids in person since March because my sister doesn't want to risk exposing us. The rest of my family, however, thinks it is all a hoax. It caused some drama when we didn't go to a family reunion this summer.

Enjoy your weekend.

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I'm glad you have someone in your family on the same side as you! Stay safe and hopefully there will be another family reunion next summer under better circumstances!
Thank you and a nice weekend to you, too!

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I'm with you in the "better safe than sorry" camp!

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Churches, and well, every religious place in indonesia were closed since march. Or at least here in jakarta. In its been a whole weeks of easter, two big eids for our moslems friends, and some balinese hindu holidays spent via youtube live.

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It was the same here for a few month. But for a while now it's possible to hold a service again. I just wish my parents (who are about 65 years old) would wear some protection or stay at home and listen to the live broadcast.

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https://www.reuters.com/article/us-health-coronavirus-southkorea-church/south-koreas-defiant-churches-face-backlash-for-hampering-covid-19-response-idUSKBN25Z1MU "At least a third of the 4,500 COVID-19 cases confirmed in the greater Seoul area over the past three weeks have been traced to church members and others who attended a Aug. 15 anti-government rally, the country’s largest cluster in months."

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Take care of yourself. And be safe.

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I do. Be safe, too!

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I was not really surprised to listen to your story.

I am listening to very similar stories on my calls with my friends, those who are in India and are living with or near parents and those who live in other countries like me.

Thankfully, my mother is a retired nurse and understand the severity of the situation and both my parents are taking precautions. But most friends are really tired of trying to convince their parents (in majority cases only Dads) to be cautious.

In last month, five of my friend's parent(s) fell sick due to ignoring COVID safety measures. And in all cases, it was the father who refuse to adhere to anything. And puts their kids and wives in danger.

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This sounds even worse. I hope the parents of your friends get better soon.
Stories like this make me hate patriarchy even more.

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It’s hard when no one else takes it seriously! We don’t have a mask wearing culture here generally and the moment masks were no longer compulsory on public transport nearly everyone stopped wearing them - it’s very hard if you want to take more precautions when you’re the only one doing it and you stand out. So well done on sticking to what you’re doing.

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That's why I love to read the Open Thread comments every week. It just feels like most people here are trying to take precautions and this helps to not feel alone. I hope you stay safe, even though it's hard to stand out!

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glad you're ALONE. though i hope your fam is going to be ok. i wouldn't take the risk either.

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Especially when gatherings such as churches and weddings have been shown to be super-spreader events. One church in Korea had hundreds of infections before they finally arrested the pastor that refused to stop holding them.

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Yep...I'm in Korea now and literally both of the big waves were related to these religious gatherings. It's frustrating because there was another case that started in Itaewon (a local had symptoms but still went clubbing) and because it's known as the foreigner area, a lot of my friends and the foreign community have been experiencing a lot of social pressure to follow the protocols, which I know (at least for the people around me) many are, like avoiding travelling and staying home. Yet the amount of locals I've seen that don't even comply with the basic hygiene of washing their hands in the bathroom (super gross) or wearing their masks fully, are not giving the same treatment...the foreigners are the ones being questioned at work about theirr whereabouts and told to "be more careful". I don't mind wearing the masks, but I also don't like the double standards. I do appreciate that Korea is quick to resolve the spread though. I definitely feel safer here.

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Rant away! I think DB is a safe place to express yourself. Sometimes you have to put yourself first. I have cancelled all family events/holidays this year and no one is also allowed to visit our home and honestly I don’t care what my husband’s family thinks. I went ballistic one time when my brother- in-law invited his co-worker without asking for my permission.
We live in an extraordinary time and I think our survival should be put in utmost importance.

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I also have a very large extended family, and one side is gathering TWICE en masse for two weddings (my cousins) within a month of each other. Both also require travel for a good portion of the group coming. I told my mom that I really, really didn't like the idea of her and my parents going. She of course insisted they would follow distancing and mask rules, but of course they don't. And I totally get it, I do. We want to spend time with the people we love; we want to be able to hug them, be close to them, celebrate things and dance the night away. But the thought of one of my parents getting sick because of some dumb wedding (sorry) makes me break out into a sweat. I don't know what the answer is, since I'll be traveling back home at the end of the year myself - clearly a risk. I think you are doing it right - making the choice for you and what you feel most comfortable with. Enjoy your weekend and keep listening to yourself so well!

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That's the downside of having such a huge family. You want to see them and they are all immediate family, but it's always a mass gathering. I honestly don't know what I should do on Christmas if the situation will still be the same as now.
I hope you and your family stay safe! Enjoy your weekend!

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It's been a week. A tough one for many reasons not least of which is struggling with the knowledge that people close to me put the health of me and others at risk, and then I am considered the selfish one for keeping on my facemask and leaving the situation early. I stand by my decision, but oh boy has this year done some irreparable harm to many relationships.

Anyways, I'm a few minutes into watching The School Nurse Files on Netlix, and this might be just the wack-a-doo drama I've been needing.

Take care everyone. And just wear your mask when you go out, take yourself as well as you can, and treat yourself to something delicious today.

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Keep doing what you're doing, strong relationships will survive.

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I really feel you! I hope you enjoy your weekend and take care of yourself!

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I'm sorry about the tough week. Keep taking care of yourself, and don't mind the rest of it. You're doing your part, and that's what counts. Hoping the weekend is better for you.

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I believe in taking good care of myself so I'm not a burden to others. Wearing face masks is a must. It just isn't about myself, this is the way I tell others that I'm being considerate of them.

You've made the correct decision.

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I've been lucky that my extended family and friends think masks aren't optional. I've had to dodge a few neighbors though when I walk or get the mail.

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I feel for you!!!

Thankfully my parents are being sensible but we are worried for my in-laws. And we are considered weirdos for wearing masks.

A friend's 70+ year old Dad refused to sanitize his hands and wear mask saying he needs to build immunity for it is now in hospital and worse part is his wife who did follow all the process fell sick due to living in the same house.

And yes, I need The School Nurse Files to unwind too.

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Look after yourself! And enjoy The School Nurse Files. I’m thinking of starting it but I really need to finish something else first.

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I need some dose of weird! :-D

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you first! it sucks that this shit has been a debate and fucked up people's rships but of course you're right. we live in a country where we are 4% of the globe's population but have about 1/3 of the death. like....it speaks to a selfishness of others and if they don't get you and the way you feel well then. i had to yell at my best friend for being reckless bc i was furious. fuck that and take care of yourself and maybe care about the world and other ppl!!!!

i'm glad ur liking nurse files im abt to watch heh. you take care too! and i am eating an acai bowl >:)

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I'm so sorry certain parts of your family insist on endangering themselves and others. Take heart that you did the right thing even if some others won't agree.

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I feel you! Your well-being should be the top priority during these times.
Have a great weekend.

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I won't even let anyone inside my house, I've even forbidden my grandson from visiting me. He's young and carefree--one of those that don't think anything will happen to them. I'm 76 and hope to see 80!

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It's so hard, but you are doing what is best for you, and I'm sure you'll see 80.

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. . . AND beyond! :-)

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Friday greetings!

DYLB? Is just so meLOW. Hyun-Ho looking towards Jung Kyung: “I’m so sad I want to die.” Jung Kyung looking toward Joon Young: “I’ve been sad forever for you.” Joon Young looking at the piano: “You make me sad.” Song Ah: ”Why are all you prodigies sad? I’m the one who should be sad.” Moon Sook looking at the whole lot of them: “You deserve to be sad.” Everyone drags their toes as they saunter along, heads down, saying, “Let’s just be sad.” Then at the end of ep 8 a big misunderstanding is barely diverted. A petty kiss scene leaves us hanging. I’m a terrible recapper for this drama.

Yu Huiyoo’s Sketchbook – What a treat, an entire episode of just IU! She is charming and amazingly talented and only 27! Why, she has her whole life ahead of her, fighting!

I-LAND selected the 7-member of ENHYPEN (was that supposed to be like hyphen without the h, or…). Felt very bad for K, but the fans didn’t warm up to him. I wonder will they really debut?

Best kdrama on air: Record of Youth. I love our seasoned model, Grandpa. Hye Hun and Jeong Ha are so good for each other. They understand each other’s weakness but don’t hold it or use it against one another. They help each other through the prejudices and disappointments and bring out the best in each other. An easy to watch kdrama.

Zombie Detective: shades of Family Book Gu, anyone remember our Daddy Gumiho and his mane of glory? Poor Jin Hyuk as Moo young isn’t so glamorous and the setting isn't so enchanting as he hides in the dump garbage waiting to catch a live crow to gnaw on.

Joo Won is kind of intriguing to me. He’s a bit gawky on Radio Star. Makes him look cute. I haven’t watched Alice yet, but it’s on my list.

If you’re looking for a good, 12 ep reality variety, Favorite Entertainment (on VIKI) is about the process, selection, and debut of a 21 C trot group. It’s fun (I love Lee Teuk as MC).

Happy weekend beanies! ♥owl

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IU's episode of Sketchbook was INCREDIBLE! She just keeps getting better and better, truly in awe of her talent.

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I meant to say a pretty kiss scene
That’s How leaving out one letter can change meaning so much!

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😂 l concur wholeheartedly with your recap of Brahms, but I will continue watching. Last episode I actually said out loud to the screen, “if you’re going to walk away, WALK already🤦🏼‍♀️” because all anyone does in this show is drag themselves around. Ay-yay-yay, you kids are never going to get ANYWHERE, both literally and also in a competitive business, if you don’t start showing some forward momentum. It gets three 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️from me but it’s the only thing I’m watching now. Slumpola ☹️

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Well Beanies.
I owe 3000 in medical bills (Ive already paid 2 grand in copays as I muddle along trying to figure out whats wrong with me).
My boss sent me an email saying everyone I work with hates me-- with quotes! Oh and Ill probably get fired at the end of Oct/beginning of November (theres more about that on my wall)
Ive reached out to career counselors because obviously this librarian thing isnt working. But they start at 1-200 dollars a session and according to all of their websites its going to take multiple sessions.
My bed has popped (again)
And the bedbugs have returned.
I was looking for a new apartment but with job insecurity...thats not going well.
And Im fairly drama slumped. Ive been watching Lonely Enough to Love and Brahms and even while I enjoy them...theres a disconnect where I dont really care. I should be obsessed with Song Ah and her chasing her dreams and have written at least 3 essays on moments when she was fully amazing and inspirational and I wanted to be her when I grew up. Instead I just listlessly watch. And thats when I DO watch! I was a month behind on Lonely!
I need someone to tell me how to live life as I really cannot afford to keep living it this wrongly. I was offered an interview for a job on the other side of the country. The job pays 16 dollars an hour more than I make now but its a manager job. Head of a department and so far and away from what I like to do that theres a part of me thats like....fuck...lets just try it. Ive been wrong about what I like and am good at for the last decade. Maybe Im wrong about this?

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Quotes from your boss about coworkers who hate you? Who does that???

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I told my friend that and she said that was just needlessly cruel. And that about sums up my 14 months working here. My manager is needlessly, carelessly cruel. It would be one thing if he were doing it with malicious intent but ai legit dont think he does. I dont think hes sitting at his desk going "muhahahaha lets see if this will make isa cry" I think he has a serious lack of tact and sensitivity and shrugged hia shoulders and said well if they said it she should hear it. Amd also hes an asshole. So theres that.

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Well, damn. I wish I had a magic wand to wave to make everything better. I guess do the interview because at this point maybe it's just worth a shot to see if this might be the thing?

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Also, what the hell is wrong with your boss? That is not how you manage and coach staff...

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How does he consistently out a**hat himself? And what kind of organization would employ this "manager"?

What state is the other job in?

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Utah. I told myself I would NEVER live in utah again. But...again. What do I know? Im going to apply for it because my new thing is to do the opposite of my inclination as my inclination doesnt work properly.

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I'm still mulling over why he included the quotes. I had someone do something a little similar. A few years after I left the hell of those office politics I found out they were testing me to see if they could scare me into quitting (joke was on them since it just prompted me to start documenting their crazy behavior so I'd have ammunition for an attorney). Are you sure anything he says is true? And are you sure your job is really on the line?

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I have no way of knowing if the quotes he included came from my coworkers unless I ask. He very easily could have made them up using the buzzwords that they are all known for. Or they could have come from one and the way he inserted them in the mail was to intentionally make it look like it came from three different people. But he succeeded (and I dont know if its his goal or not) in making me not trust any of them or want anything to do with them. So its driven a wedge there.
And is my job really on the line? I cant say. Or I cant until I talk to my mentor/ look in my procedure binder which Ive been too upset to do. He kept telling me before and during the meeting that this isnt a bad thing and Im doing a good job. But he followed that up with DIRECT QUOTES on how everyone dreads working with me. I dont know the firing process. Ive never been fired (well fired and quit at the same time from a retail job in college. I had to go home for dental surgery and deliberately had my return date the day after a mandatory staff meeting. My manager told me if I didnt show up Id be fired. I told her I was in another state for surgery. A week later I called to see if I was on the schedule and I was not) before. But from what I understand theres a process.
Performance review
PIP (and I dont remember what that stands for) but I think its a timeline to get yourself together
And then you get fired if you dont meet the timeline.
Thank you for making me think it through a bit more. Cause Ive basically been wailing, listening to a pride and prejudice variation and eating pizza. Done thinking.
Whether or not firing is as imminently close as I believe ita still time to get out of here. As its not a good atmosphere.
Oh and sometimes I switch out the pizza for chinese food or breakfast burritos.

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I just don't want to to jump into another terrible spot. Maybe you could thin a little about your next interview as a chance to also interview them? What do you want to know about your co-workers and the people you'll manage? What do you want to know about the management position? So you have a list of questions too that help you decide.

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Are you secretly a career counselor? Those are good questions! I dont know what I want. I really have no idea. Every time I think Im done with librarianship I remember all the reasons why Im not. And I never think of asking those sorts of questions in an interview. Im going to think and noy just leap. I always wait until Im desperate.

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Not a career counselor, just experienced in public service employment. I've worked in both great and terrible places.

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Ah, that explains it--Utah is a Red state.

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You have been working in a toxic environment I guess.

I was like that once too. Trust me, not every working place is a horrible place.

Your boss is awpoeihft [0qw83 oqihefp0as 9y8rfvon wiryh pwae8tyoavw y35!!!!!

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So my manager friends and I think you should consider visiting HR . You have proof of his terrible "management style" ( who is stupid enough to send an email like this?) and he needs a wake up call. If you think your job is really in danger, you might not have anything to lose. Maybe the perfect job is right there, where you already are, with a humane and respectful manager at a different branch.

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HR was copied in the email and their in the meeting when he took all of my work time away. They insisted he give me a deadline for when I get assignmenta done that I no longer have time to do since I cant work anywhere.

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So sorry. I can't believe an HR department would think this is appropriate.

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That is so super unprofessional of him, not to mention needlessly cruel! That makes me really angry. I hope you can find a way forward soon and better things to come.

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you're not doing anything wrong. life's tough. if it helps you why not try? but also weigh the pros and cons. anything you do will be okay and if you want to go back then you can.

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i am so so so sorry. that's so disgusting re: your boss and it's unprofessional. i hope you don't get fired but if things do go that way that it will be okay...seems like this is overwhelming.

idk where you live and frankly unemployment insurance sucks but if push comes to shove maybe you can apply? it sounds like an insanely overwhelming time.

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Best thing that ever happened to me was to get fired from a job I hated. Finally forced me to wake up and figure out what I really wanted to do beside just survive.

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I'm speechless, Isa. It's all so horrible. Maybe a new job on the other side of the country would be a good thing?

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She needs to come to western Washington state. We'll take you in, Isa. AND our minimum wage is $13.50/hr. Utah's is $7.25/hr.

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Library jobs are hard to come by here though. I know people who worked part time at the library any part time as baristas or booksellers (for big box book stores) part time for years before they landed a full time library position.

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*and

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The Timberland system isn't that hard to find a job in. I started part-time with them, but really worked full time because I substituted in other libraries enough to earn a full time wage. I got healthcare insurance with a part-time position. Now that I'm retired, I get a state retirement of $330/mo and I only worked for Timberland for 9 years. The problem right now is that our libraries are basically shut down due to COVID.

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@kdnomore we must live near each other. The librarians I knew holding down two jobs were working for the Timberland system.

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Librarians? Most Librarians in the Timberland system hold high-paying, full time jobs. It's those that work in circulation that have to have more than one job. I was a circ assistant and I loved subbing in various libraries to see how they did things. I got many good ideas that way. I was able to support myself very well after my divorce by working for Timberland, and couldn't fault them in any way. I live south of Olympia.

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We'd love to have you though. It really does rain a lot in the winter, but you, @isthatacorner, can comfort yourself with Sam Kim's Seattle song. https://youtu.be/F_zem1MftbQ

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I missed a lot hiding in my little corner! But dude, no lie I have legit been thinking about moving to washington and have been looking at jobs there!

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Other side of the country ... is 16 per hour enough to more than cover the difference in cost of living? If the interview is remote, why not go for it?

Like Egads, wish I could do something to help, to make things better!

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I read your other post and I would like to say GET OUT OF THERE!! No one deserves to work in a toxic environment or work with toxic people. I was in a very toxic work environment last year and although I was not directly involved in the main problem, the people that were, created lots of small issues for those of us on the sidelines. Being surrounded by that stressful setting took a big toll on me and my close colleagues. We each had our own breakdowns and it was scary witnessing how much stress can effect us. I remember video calling my family and they were all so concerned with how worn down I was. And that was just me being on the sidelines, so I can't imagine how hard it is for you to be on the actual receiving end of all this. Although being fired might not be the best option, I would take it as a blessing in disguise, because honestly, you deserve better. Also you haven't been living your life wrongly. Life is just prepping you for something better along the way. Trust yourself. No one ever knows what the future has in store for them. You may never know what will happen at a new place too. It could be the same, it could be better. But ultimately, you must remember that you deserve to be happy and therefore, you deserve to be treated better. You got this!! We're all here for you.

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Hi beanies. So I finally decided to proceed with my story writing and I've been doing along with some research. It's not something that will help me with my career or anything but I decided to take it as a challenge and an exercise since almost everyone I know is trying their hand at blogging. It's keeping my mind occupied. Also beanies I hit a major disappointment regarding college. The colleges which were on the top of my list haven't started their admissions yet while my safety schools proceeded with theirs. I had to deposit fees for my safety school because of their deadline and I'm pretty sure I'll be going there. Although I know it's the most practical option since the college is in my city and I'll be much safer, it still hurts a ton. It just feels like others are moving ahead with their lives and I'm stuck here. My teachers also recommended the path I have taken and it's much more cost efficient and I can do my masters from a better place but it's definitely not what I had imagined. I'm just scared of the fact that I may lose out on my potential or be stuck with a safer career option. I've also been avoiding career research because of this reason.
On another note, does anyone know how to politely call out a friend on potential internalised misogyny. It's a very close friend of mine and I honestly don't know how to navigate this situation. Also is anyone watching 18 Again? I wanna know how it is.

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Oh no, I'm sorry to hear about the college stress, Mani-chan :(

Maybe I can share my own experience for a little comfort/solidarity? After I was done with IB, I had all these big plans about going to college with my best friend in London. I was inspired by one of my cousins who went down a similar path and thrived, so I thought, wow, that's what I want for myself too! So I went ahead with the application process and long story cut short, there were some admin issues with it and I basically ended up not getting into any of my 5 choices, even though my grades were far above the minimum cut-off score. I was totally devastated at the thought of having to give up on that dream and also stay in my own city. All my close friends ended up going overseas, and it felt like I was all alone. It wasn't what I wanted, and sometimes I still wonder if I should've waited or tried to find some other route and make it to London. But I think no matter where you go, always remember that it doesn't have to be the be all and end all!

My college experience ended up being a pretty good one. I met good friends and a wonderful professor who really believed in me, so much so that he offered me work experience positions, off of which I was able to secure a really good job. Even if the situation may not be ideal from the beginning, sometimes good opportunities can still arise. I know it's all very scary right now, but remember to take a breath and not be so hard on yourself. Also, don't be afraid to ask for help when you need it! I really hope wherever you go, you'll be in a good and safe environment that works for you ❤️

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Thank you so much for sharing your story @choijunu. I really needed to hear someone who had a similar experience because I just wanted to know if it would be okay. You have no idea how much this has reassured me

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Of course, I'm glad to hear that it helped a bit. If you ever need someone to chat with, you can always just mention me on the fanwalls!! Sending you hugs and strength ❤️

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Also, re: the friend. Have you tried perhaps asking her to explain why she feels/reacts that way about make-up/skincare/stuff that she considers "girly"? Sometimes, articulating thoughts out loud is a good way to see that they are not quite right/fair.

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I haven't asked her about it but I think I will try when I meet her in person the next time.

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I guess I'm more than 10 years older than you. When I was much younger, everything needed to happen according to my plan in order of me to be happy. I struggled a lot when things didn't happen as I had originally planned. However, I learned this much later on.

You do things that:
1. make you happy;
2. you don't struggle doing them;
3. are beneficial both to yourself and to others.

I struggled to navigate my life to make it fit my pre-planned plan. As the result, it turned out so badly. That was when I knew that sometimes, when something didn't happen, it wasn't because you were not good enough, or the destiny was treating you badly. It might be because that was REALLY a better plan for you. Everything doesn't have to be perfect, dear. It just has to be good enough.

If the universities you have been aiming for are YOUR things, you'll get into one of them easily. Maybe this is just not the right time. If you still want to get into one of those unis next year, do so. But I'd encourage you to try going to the uni that accepted you at the moment. You might like it more than you expected.

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Thank you so much @mmmmm. I was kind of disappointed but I'll just continue hoping for the best

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the TRUTH. it's sad how we learn things retroactively. even though life is fucked up i am so happy to be free from my mind trying to push me in one thing. all i want now is to do what i want, happiness, good life in love and friends, and to help people. life should be fun and worth it and no one can tell me otherwise now

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The best thing about those carefully made plans is that they never ever work out :)

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I would always tell this to a friend, "never plan, it doesn't work out". While I do think planning does work out for a few people but it may still not be upto your expectation.

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hopefully this doesn't sound patronizing so if it does ignore me / i am sorry. but woo college. first o fall, this is unprecedented time-wise and if you couldn't wait then you couldn't wait. not only that but your teachers are right re: cost. it may not be what you want but it's also horrible that things are proceeding in uncertain times and things are that expensive. if you have a good home life it will be good to be closer.

that being said, if you do not like the school then you can always change later. it may be a difficult process and to start anew but what you want is worth chasing. however, you are not stuck and a cost efficient option is an incredibly smart decision. i am 28 and in like 280k of debt because of grad school. and why would your school limit your career options? college is what you make of it (and sometimes college is just college. a place to learn. i went it a "good" one and it was just...fine but came with a lot of debt for my parents.)

i ended up changing what i want. i always had a goal in mind but i pursued what i wanted to after. it's your life and you're young. you can do literally anything within your circumstances. try not to fear time and place as much. don't fear a future you haven't seen. just live in the moment. your'e growing and things change. and although i do not want all this debt i don't regret doing what i want. i wish i knew this when i was younger but it's helped me learn. you deserve everything. fear is just that. you live and you see what happens but you shouldn't feel left out, losing out, left behind when in the end it can be very arbitrary. money and name don't mean shit if you're unhappy.

and evaluate your personalities and the way you function in that relationship. if you're a more forceful person maybe joke about it or be bossier about what sheh thinks (idk how to word this lol i just pretty bossy and i'm like "no.") but if she says something and you don't like it—say so! and then you can explain why. i always have knowledge on hand to pull from so i can be factual if i bring up sth like this.

i'm glad you are writing!!! good luck to you! growing up sucks and is hard but as much as you can try to go with the flow; i didn't and i wish i was 1/10th as relaxed as i am now lmao

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Thanks a ton @boughtabride. I just really wanted to hear from people with experience because I don't know many people. Thank you so much for sharing your story.

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I'm sorry to hear that you don't get to go to your first choice school, but I'm going to chime in with some advice too: college is what you make of it. I know that a lot of opportunities can be had by attending certain schools and making certain connections, and I'm not going to trivialize you for wanting those things. But truthfully, in the end a good career comes from the work you put into what you pursue as much as anything else.

More than that the best way to go into college is to know what you want out of it - are you willing to try new subjects, or are you dead set on a major? Even if you know for sure where you want to go with your career, be flexible, and try new things. Make sure to try everything that interests you even a little bit at least once. My biggest regrets with my undergrad is that I didn't start branching out more until my later years. I went to uni knowing what I wanted to study, but no idea about much else (I had vague notions, but nothing concrete). I ended up keeping my major but also doing a minor and taking lots of courses on subjects that interested me (like Russian history, the crusades, media and pop culture). It allowed me to expose myself to a wider variety of ideas and to think more broadly.

That's the real goal of undergraduate education in my opinion - where you are does matter, but it is much less important than what you do while you're there. And as, others have mentioned - there is always opportunity to transfer or change schools if you truly do not like where you are. There are also always chances to study abroad, take courses at other schools or over the summer. There's no hard and fast rule in life about how to do any of this. Best of luck with everything! Remember, you still have your whole life to figure things out, and life is full of unexpected opportunities no matter where you are at.

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Thank you so much @snarkyjellyfish. I am so thankful for your input. I just needed some reassurance and I am so glad to have gotten it. Thank you so much for helping this person entering adulthood.

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You're welcome! I remember being in your shoes. It's rough and the world can be scary when you first enter it. Hell, sometimes it's still scary to me, and I've been and "adult" for a while now. I still get overwhelmed sometimes, especially these days. I never fault someone young for being worried about life and the world - that's natural and normal.

I think it's great that you're asking for help figuring things out - that is hard for a lot of people. I feel like we're expected to figure this all out on our own, which is just silly. The world is crazy and there's no map or guidebook to help. I want you to know that you're doing great - you seem smart, observant, and curious about the world, and I think you're going to be fine. But it's human to need a little extra reassurance, so never feel afraid to ask for it.

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Second Last Love - would some kind souls tell me if it’s worth watching please?

Kim Hee-Ah and Ji Jin-hee as the leads are the biggest draw cards for me. The first two episodes are quite flat despite loving the vivid career woman played by KHA (which is very different from her other roles).

Just wonder whether I should invest another 16 hours as it’s a 20-episode drama. I just don’t think the story I’ve seen so far can sustain that many episodes. Any thought from those who have watched it?

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it's a cute but boring story. surprisingly it's pretty progressive on its look about getting older and marriage and stuff. i watched it for seul gi. it's nothing special but you can watch it at your leisure or just skip around. also they are both very hot so there's that.

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what are your favourite couples from k dramas you like?
because i love Hwang Si-Mok and Han Yeo-Jin too.

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yesssss :)

hmmmm lee young jae and lee chang jun of course. i love the couple from save me 2 (of the MC but it's a support charcter's rship the most.) i love all the couples seul gi has been in (from what i've seen. her last 2 dramas i refuse to watch)

my most recent is: jealousy incarnate couple is one of my f a v o r i t e s.

ummmm high school king, ex boyfriend club, strong woman dbs (i hate the show but they are my otp conundrum.) i am not really into romcoms now but some of my fav couples OF ALL TIME are from the ones i used to watch: city hall [:')], the greatest love, protect the boss—all those main couples!

oh! the show heart to heart!

i have seen a ton of romcoms and there's ones i am def missing but that's all i can think of rn. my favorite is just an equal partnership or something can be confusing or unequal but in a way that it evens out. so basically it's like...the writer has to respect the woman they are writing in the partnership. most of the shows i mention i like or love the writing unlike strong woman dbs but his devotioon to her in the show is amazing he's like one of my fav leads. it's just rare that some sort of VISIBLE respect manifests or that a woman will be able to control her life and even rarer for a man to be enraptured by a woman in a supportive way. he was truly a great boyfriend lol

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who are lee young jae and lee chang jun ?

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LYJ and LCJ are from Forest of Secrets / Stranger Season 1 - it’s not your usual OTP but their underlying story is EPIC. I just finished watching Ep 13 of Season 2, this couple’s impact is still greatly felt. Sublime writing from the writer.

Nonetheless, do not expect to see a swoony romance - just a warning because FoS is not a romance drama.

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Thanks! Your description of lovely and boring is so apt. I finished four episodes already - it’s probably right as a in-between pass time drama. And Kim Seul-Gil is sparkly as usual - hope she has more scenes going forward.

Same as you, I love Jealousy Incarnate and the JJS-GHJ couple is for life (and why would anyone think the second lead has even a chance?!). Also agreed that the ML in SWBDS is among the best MLs.

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Gong Yoo's comment on the Coffee Prince reunion special about him thinking he's already missed the train on marriage kind of made me sad. I do find it a bit odd that we almost never hear of South Korean top actors/actresses getting married. It seems like to enjoy a married life they had better marry before they become big.

"Yoon Eun Hye abruptly asked Gong Yoo, “Do you have any plans to get married?” Gong Yoo replied, “It’s not that I don’t want to but I’ve kind of missed that period.” When asked the same question, Yoon Eun Hye answered, “I think that I want to focus on my work a little more and then do that.”

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I'm sure there are hundreds of people who would marry Gong Yoo tomorrow if asked. So if polyamory is a legal thing in S. Korea, I'd totally move my family there and marry him. My husband has already voiced his support years ago! LOL.

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Lol. As much as I really like him, reading the articles interviewing him made me think that he is quite an artisitc person.

Not to say that I'm a bit relieved that there is another beautiful and single soul on this planet. Oppa you still have me. I might also miss the marriage train later on too!

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