ok so i talked way too much about sex work but obviously i care about it….i forgot to mention that it doesnt exist in a vacuum and that prison abolition is part of the work we have to do to protect people, abolish work, and make sure our black trans sex work sisters are seen and heard. there was this girl at this organizing training i went to that helps unionize black trans sex workers. i have to remember to put others feelings before myself but bodies are not commodity. all i want is ownership of myself fully and i want others to own themselves fully. this is going to be a lifelong project. i am also shedding my own ideas about myself and what i went through when i was a teenager to now and viewing my body, sex, and men, and how destructive messaging can be. also how fucking obsessed people are with teen purity yet hypersexuality. that seeps into womanhood. that’s why men are banned from fucking.

girl that has nothing to do with the post now but 2gether (thai BL series) ended with a high five and i still find that so fucking funny. i wanna say half of it was probably cos covid, cos they were filming the show still, but a high five? i didn’t watch the last ep but i genuinely think it’s one of the better (best?) BL shows ive seen. because i do not take that genre seriously nor has it ever asked me to (also thinking abt BL and capital and sexuality and it’s kinda sad.)

there are some really amazing global filmmakers, that includes thailand!!!!!, and there’s a very popular gay auteur from there who makes experimental longform about thailand, society, his homosexuality/homosexual and his feelings towards the way the society is going (not good. thailand has FAAAAASCINATINGGGGG history) what i would like to see is these actors actualyl striving towards a life to expand their artistic skills. i saw promise in one of the boys in particular, though idk if thats wishful thinking, and i WANT TOSEE HIM GO FARTHER. im sick of seeing these men in horrible TV shows with no care for the craft like go AWAY. a whole crew slaves over this shit and you cant even do your job? also it is fucking insane that kissing is something actors esp in BL cannot commit to. you’re an actor. i have had the displeasure of watching people roll around making out and almost dry humping for this stupid medium and that was for an indie short. YOU CAN DO SOMETHING for your job like ONE HUMAN KISS AS A TREAT? (but not too much which is why WHY R U was messy cos they were fucking all the time and i was like bitch if i wanna watch gay porn, which i do not, i would…)