I’m starting to get some super shady vibes from Jae-hyuk in Will You Have Dinner With Me? I can’t help but wonder if he was emotionally abusive towards Do-hee in their relationship. His behaviors seem very manipulative and quite frankly, today started to peel back to show something a little darker, and I really find myself wondering what their relationship was like.

I realized that we’ve seen scenes from Hae-kyung and Na-eul’s relationship and we can see why it worked and we know why it fell apart. We have no idea what the relationship between Do-hee and Jae-hyuk looked like; were they lovey dovey? Did they enjoy sharing meals together? How did they influence one another? Were they on the brink of marriage, or were they drifting apart? We know Do-hee fell apart after he left, but we also have no idea what she was like before now. The only glimpse I can recall of their relationship is the flashback to him telling her to eat the sashimi the way he likes it and completely ignoring her reaction. He totally ghosted her and now he thinks that she’ll forgive and forget as if he never hurt her. There’s an entitlement to his behaviors that is disturbing because it can be so subtle.

What I do find interesting is that both the audience and the characters are on Do-hee’s side, because obviously what he did was super sh*tty, but in the drama, the people at the studio are still willing to work with someone who hurt their coworker like that. That’s a sh*t thing to make someone go through. It’s bad enough to have to work with an ex – but to have to work with an ex who dropped without explanation and now is harassing you is awful. Like, I would never ever subject someone I work with to that. But the thing about Jae-hyuk is that he is kind of charming – which is a trait that many abusers have. Do-hee has stood strong and doesn’t seem like she’ll waiver no matter what his reason for leaving is; but at the same time, emotional abuse is about wearing a person down slowly, breaking down defenses and making the abused seem unreasonable. Small things, like cornering her to give her a wedding invitation, seem harmless on the surface, but could be scary for someone who got over being gaslighted for years.

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    I havent seen the latest eps but what you said about the studio people got me. Ah Yeong is obviously a very close sunbae/eonni who cares a lot about Do Hee so I was very surprised when she asked DH to work with the ex and DH’s reaction to it was quite mild for me. Sure she refused at first, but she never got mad at her or talked abt how upsetting it is to make her work with the ex. Which i found strange – it would’ve been understandable if theirs was a formal r/ship but we’ve seen how DH has no problem going up against her boss before. I would be super annoyed if other coworkers are all chummy with the ex too.

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      Agreed! It was even worse because Ahyoung seems to be one of the few people that knew he never even went to the US! What is up with that? Why is she tolerating him being there when he’s a verified liar on top of being an a**hole?

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      Even I was extremely shocked at Ah Young’s behaviour. She knew that Jae Hyuk had not been abroad and that the break up had been hard on Do Hee but she still proceeded with the plan anyway. And regarding the co workers being chummy, they don’t know how bad the break up was or even how unfair it was so it’s natural that they may feel a bit awkward but they don’t have any reason not to like him

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    Have just finished ep 7 and Jae-hyuk’s behaviour disturbingly reminds me of Lee Ji-Hoon’s last role in 9.9 Billion Woman, uh oh.

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      Haven’t seen that one, but I used to work with domestic violence victims, and a lot of the time the abuse was not physical, but it was more like this – this need to control and be there constantly. It’s very scary.

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    Yes you called it, I couldn’t put my finger why he made me uncomfortable. Also the way he keeps calling her away to “talk to her” – I hope she finally answers and says “talk right here”.
    There must be a purpose of why they have made him so icky in the script.

    Still, I’m LOVING this show – except yesterday was hard – but I trust things will work out for the best.

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      I am loving this too – I binged the first six episodes this weekend and now I have something to obsess over on Monday/Tuesday for the first time in a long while. I really love the way all the relationships are unfolding. There are a surprising amount of layers to everything, sometimes obvious, sometimes less so. But Lee Ji-hoon is doing a good job with the character, because even if I don’t like Jae-hyuk, he feels so real.

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        He is layered and complex isn’t he?

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          100%. I really hope this drama deals with the mental health aspect respectfully. So far it’s been fine, but very superficial. Jae-hyuk seems a lot darker and because he is both a lead and more complex, I really hope it doesn’t boil down to “boy just cray”.

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            Yes I agree with you @snarkyjellyfish – after last night’s episode he seems to be showing some pretty creepy signs of something bad.
            And I hope with a ‘psychiatrist’ character on the show we will get some kind of reference to mental health issues.

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    I’ve only watched about 20 minutes of ep 7 so far and I totally got the shady vibes you’re talking about here! We still don’t know Jae-hyuk’s full story but from what we’ve seen thus far, he’s just bad news. Even Hae-kyung advised her to be careful about him!

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    In yesterday’s episodes JaeHyeok was really scary. I mean: Do Hee makes him clear EVERY SINGLE time they talk that they will not get together, yet he acts like a psycho who only hears his voice. He’s a stalker and manipulative and totally crazy.
    I mean, he’s the kind of guy who would be something horrible just to get what he wants.
    He needs to go back to jail (it’s my theory that he was in jail and not abroad studying).

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      I’m more convinced they’re going to go the sick route and he was treated for something – though now I wonder if it was a mental health issue seeing how homeless ajusshi reacted to him and later homeless ajusshi went to see Hae-kyung. But prison is an option – I mean, if they’re hinting that homeless ajusshi lost his family in an accident, it would explain a lot if it was Jae-hyuk’s fault.

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        I think these are the two theories I’m playing with as well. Either he killed the homeless ajusshi’s family somehow or he has some kind of serious psychiatric illness. At this point, I’m hoping it’s the former.

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          I also wonder if it was a manslaughter thing and it led to mental health issues? I mean, like I said, I get serious abuser vibes from him, but that doesn’t preclude him from also having mental health issues (nor is it an excuse).

          My issue with Jae-hyuk being involved in a homicide of some sort is that there’s really no way for it to work cleanly – I could see him being one of two drivers in an accident that caused the deaths of homeless ajusshi’s family – but what if they’re not dead? What if he just did something to ruin ajusshi and estrange him from his family? Ajusshi also seemed more scared of him than angry at him – and it feels like seeing Jae-hyuk was what pushed him to see Hae-kyung. I also got the feeling that ajusshi knows Hae-kyung personally and wonder if he wasn’t there for help. I am also pretty sure at this point that he’s not actually homeless, he just chooses to appear so.

          There’s some piece of the puzzle missing here which connects the three and I can’t quite figure it out. I hope we get more answers today.

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            I guess we’ll have some answers in today’s ep. Still waiting for subs.

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    Jae Hyuk seemed dangerous for the first time and Hae Kyung sensed that….I don’t think a licensed psychiatrist will say he is dangerous out of nowhere, he said that because he sensed something and Do Hee better listen…No Eul is another piece of work…as for work place setting, I can see how they may not object to exes working together…its business at the end of the day…Jae Hyuk has only shown his slightly crazy, deranged persona to Hae Kyung…as far as workplace is concerned, he is harmless and Do Hee is strong enough to hold her ground so I don’t think its unreasonable…I do believe Do Hee has to speak up about this constant harassment, it is harassment and Jae Hyuk needs to be fired over that.

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      Exes working together isn’t an issue most of the time. The reason I brought up the workplace in this particular instance is because this is typical in patterns of abuse – wanting to control the person in every way, including inserting themselves into places where they shouldn’t be.

      I get that Do-hee is strong enough to get past it, but that’s the point – why do we constantly expect women to bear the burden of putting up with harassment or taking control of the situation alone? Why do we expect them to be the bigger person? She said she didn’t want to work with him, she said she wanted nothing to do with him, she has rejected him multiple times, and he has no respect for that. It is very clear to everyone around her that she does not want anything to do with Jae-hyuk, and placing the onus solely on her is unfair. Making her work with him, even if of her own volition, isn’t fair here because she’s doing it under duress.

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        This is a kdrama, under normal circumstances HR would probably step in and ensure these were not in the same team in most cases… but remember how this whole saga unfolded……she was going to get fired whether she like it or not and even though her boss was reluctant thanks to I am guessing legal ramifications of her ridiculous show…that is when Jae Hyuk extended an olive branch…that was also the only way to keep Do Hee around…I do hope her boss sees that this was wrong for obvious reasons but I am guessing nobody knows about how messed up Jae Hyuk is yet….I am curious…he didn’t leave for States, I am assuming he was in a mental asylum getting treated

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    Wow. Just watched episode 8. Ready to comment when you are!
    I’m changing my jail theory to psychiatrist hospital internment 😱 😱 😱
    Every single episode he gets more and more psycho!!

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      It’s like this show is slowly peeling the layers and giving us insight into deeper dynamics

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