An appreciation post and some cultural context as well.

For the past several weeks, I’ve been immensely enjoying a little web C-drama starring Shen Yue, Hu Ti Tian, Gao Zhi Ting, Wang Zi Wei, and Sun Ning They are all new faces in the acting scene, but all made such an impact in a sweet story that didn’t require a lot of acting chops, but they fulfilled their roles so perfectly, I can’t imagine anyone playing Xiao Xi, Jiang Chen, Bo Song, Lin Jing Xiao, and Lu Yang.
I’ve been trying to figure out what I liked so much about this coming-of-age story, because it’s been done ad nauseam, but it somehow was fresh, even if you knew exactly what was going to happen. The anti-social, closed-off, handsome and intelligent boy gets the social, bubbly, not as intelligent and happy girl who won’t take no for an answer, while another handsome but considerate boy gets the boot. We see it a hundred miles away, but we still watch. This is an actor-driven drama, for sure, and in the hands of different actors which poorer chemistry, the story would have looked like every other coming-of-age drama. On paper, it’s pedestrian; on screen, it’s mesmerizing. And the ~40 minute episodes make it so easily binge-able.

Since it is an actor-driven drama, it must have been the actors that drew me to it. I have to start with the height difference of this OTP—it’s gargantuan! Hu Ti Tian looks much taller than he actually is next to Shen Yue. I looked it up, he’s no taller than my own husband who stands at 6’2” but she is 5’3”(according to VIKI), and I would have sworn she is barely 5” tall because their height difference is much starker than mine and my husband’s (and I stand at 5’4 ¾”). And my husband agrees because in his own words, “I dated a girl that was 4’11” and that’s where she was when she hugged me.” I think I would have swooned watching them together. (I’ll just chalk that up to things-you-find-out-about-your-spouse-after -15-years-of-marriage.) And because of this alone, they are already endearing.

And then there is how she is around him, wearing her heart out there for all to see, including the boy, and in the very first scene she tells him she likes him where he readily responds, “I don’t like you.” But it doesn’t deter her, she just has to find another way to worm herself into his heart! And it’s slow going, but worth every subtle look he gives her, because you know she’s being successful. So you wonder why he is not more forward about his own feelings for her, and why he is antagonistic towards her.

One: It is outside his personality, living on his own, the studious achiever, who won’t get involved with anyone as to derail his focus in getting into the school of his choice and the career of his choice, which we find out is medicine (which I didn’t know going into this and when I found out, I was over the moon!).

Two: It is the culture, where schooling is your first priority and in your last year of high school where your end of school exam determines the next 20 years of your life, having a significant other is more than frowned upon, it’s basically forbidden. There’s a whole scene where the director of the school scolds the entire class because of “secret” relationships, only to find out it’s another couple in the class who confess and not Xiao Xi and Bo Song, or Xiao Xi and Jiang Chan. LOL.

Three: The show requires it. The secret and not-so-secret ways that Jiang Chan shows his affection to Xiao Xi made my heart stutter, and kept me invested in their relationship. It was just so swoon-worthy! Things like brushing her hair behind her ear so that he could see her face, making an excuse to go to the teacher’s office to look for the money she misplaced, catching her head when she was nodding off and gently placing it on her desk, and being just so suave and cool about all of it as to not arouse suspicion. I could and I have re-watched those scenes multiple times. (Thank you for the gifs, @modernflapper!)
Then there was the innocent and expressive Xiao Xi. She could have been as annoying as a gnat in this, but somehow she was even more endearing to me than any other female lead I’ve come across in my drama-watching. Her far-away looks the way she perked up every time Jiang Chen gave her the time of day was like a little puppy jumping up every time her favorite toy was given to her. He is her favorite person, for whatever inexplicable reason. She saw the heart and the potential of this boy, by one tiny act of generosity to his little brother, and she was totally smitten. And she was persistent, through a decade of a one-sided courtship, but it worked because he only had eyes for her. She was so lucky to not have wasted all her time on him, because in real life, that probably would have happened. She was steadfast that her “crush” was always really “love,” although it couldn’t be called that at the tender age of 16 years. And even as she matured throughout, her love was still constant. But I fear for her more than I fear for Jiang Chen in this future that they have. More on this later.

Then there’s Bo Song, our second lead. I didn’t have second lead syndrome at all, because the end game was so apparent and this poor guy never had a chance. Not because Jiang Chen is any better than him, but only because Xiao Xi was unmovable in her love for the former. But I would love to have a guy like him pining over me, and he’s so my type it’s not even funny—considerate, knows what she needs before she even needs it, knows her better than she knows herself, always puts her desires before his own, and a hot body (yes, I said it).

When he took a taxi to the park after his swimming recruitment just to see her, I was so torn because I knew it would lead to someone’s heartbreak—I thought it would be his heart, but it ended up being Jiang Chen’s, while he shielded Xiao Xi whose heart was already broken. This scene served as the turning point of the drama to me, when Jiang Chen realized his feelings and had to back-pedal, literally, to get back into Xiao Xi’s good graces and to mend her broken heart.

I can’t not mention Ling Xiao and Lu Yang, who serve as another cute couple to root for, only the opposite in terms of who is infatuated with whom, with Lu Yang proclaiming to everyone about the girl he loves, and he does this quite publically, in front of the whole school, dyed hair and earring and all. And I may have swooned a little. He’s a good looking kid and much better looking when he’s looking bad.

But back to our OTP. Jiang Chen becomes a CT surgeon…. I’m just going to let that sink in. A. CARDIOTHORACIC. SURGEON. Wait, I’m getting ahead of myself. So, there were some things that I didn’t really understand in this show because I’m not from China, never been there, would like to go some day. However, the stars aligned and the universe sent me someone that went to and graduated from high school there and has spent his university years here in the US. In my clinic. This whole week. And unbeknownst to him, I asked him why things are the way they are in the Chinese education system.

Here were his answers:
Q. Why don’t you become a doctor in China?
A. There are three types of doctors, those with a bachelor’s degree, those with a master’s degree, and those with Ph.D’s, so you can get a 4-year medical degree right out of high school and be called “Doctor.” My mother didn’t want me to become a doctor in China.
(Great Segway, because Jiang Chen’s mother is IRATE that he would become a physician too).
Q. Why is that?
A. Doctor’s are not respected in China, and you don’t make any money until you become a surgeon or something else. The training is long and you don’t really get paid during your training. You have to be independently wealthy to become a doctor, or be dirt poor until you get a job after training. But surgeons do make a lot of money there.
Q. Then what jobs are revered?
A. Business people, teachers (who make a lot of money tutoring apparently). Teaching anything from math to English to Chinese privately makes a good living in China.
Now, it makes sense Jiang Chen’s mom wanted him to be a math scholar at a prestigious university instead of a doctor—*mind blown*
Q. What happens if you don’t get into a college?
A. If you want to be someone, then you repeat your last year of high school and take the test again.

But back to my discussion about his being a surgeon. He is such a stereotypical surgeon: prickly, quiet, calm-on-the-outside, a countenance of steal, but churning on the inside, so much so that he has ulcers, and a poor communicator. When he communicates, he’s sarcastic, like he’s speaking in code, and you have to decipher what he really means, ALL. THE. TIME. Now, in the interest of the drama, this is interesting, witty, and smart, but in real life, this is so frustrating! But that’s who he is and that who Xiao Xi loves. However, he will continue to do this, and it will be really hard for him to talk to her in plain Mandarin about what he needs, and she will find it difficult to tell him what she really wants and needs as well, fearing that it will interfere with his work, most likely. And back to work. He is a CT surgeon, probably the busiest surgical subspecialty and he won’t ever put in less than 80 hours a week into work. You can’t and still have good outcomes for your patients. Eight-ten hour surgeries are not uncommon, and then if you’re a transplant surgeon, you could be up for over 24 hours from start to finish. It’s insane!

But some things that they can do to keep the cuteness alive…

1. Sleep on call together. It won’t be good sleep, but on those nights where he doesn’t come home, she could bring him dinner and stay in his little office bedroom. I actually did this with my husband when we were interns and would be at the hospital for over 24 hours at a time. We were on different teams but with the same call schedule. We hardly saw each other, but we would just cuddle and sleep in the same call room for about 30 min-1 hour at a time between calls and admissions. Sometimes I’d never see him all night though, or see him doing an admission while I was just finishing up with one. We had no kids. I can’t imagine if we did.

2. Delay having children. This is a must. They need to figure out how they are going to make time for each other before having kids, because their time will be for their children and not their relationship, and they WILL grow apart, and that’s when break-ups occur. I would wait at least 5 years in their case so that their jobs are stable and, more importantly, they know how much time they must make for each other so that one or the other doesn’t feel neglected.

3. Keep their best friends close (except for Bo Song that is). A buffer is always good in a relationship and friends that Xiao Xi can vent to about Jiang Chen (because believe me, she will, a lot) will be important. However, that person shouldn’t be Bo Song, because that boy will be a whole pot trouble if she complains to him. And I could see in 10-15 years, if he’s still there, she may go to him if he’s still as considerate as he is now.

4. Xiao Xi will probably always feel like Jiang Chen doesn’t love her as much as she loves him. And Jiang Chen will need to figure out her love language, which it looks like food (and cooking for her) and physical touch to me. The more he does this, the more she will feel that he loves her. So that she doesn’t go to someone that does make her feel loved.

5. Jiang Chen will always feel like she doesn’t really understand what he’s saying and he’s going to be annoyed with this, continually, for decades probably. That might make him withdraw from her and into his work even more, but knowing Xiao Xi, that will just be the impetus to make him pursue is affections more, and depending on how he reacts to this in the future will determine if they really stay together. So, again, that boy just needs to communicate better. Apparently, getting him tipsy is the only way to make him talk, so if Xiao Xi had any brains about her, she’d keep that liquor cabinet stocked.

I really needed that epilogue monologue at the end of Episode 23 where he just talked about when he fell in love with her and why he did and I hope he communicated that to Xiao Xi as well. I saw the subtle things he did for her, but I’m a word-person (can you tell?) and you need to tell me in no uncertain terms why you are doing things and what you’re feeling because I’m dense that way. But she doesn’t necessarily need this (at least how she is portrayed in the drama) because as long as he shows his affection other ways (see #4), they’ll be together forever. *finger hearts*

I loved watching A LOVE SO BEAUTIFUL. You have really summed up the thoughts so well. Now I want to watch it again. 🙂
And the gif. 😀

I read the whole thing!!!! And I loved it!!!! Planning on writing an essay on my own in my wall someday 😃