Beanie level: Errand boy

What in god’s name happened in the writing room for Marry My Husband episodes 11-12?

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    I think we are all complaining now. 😆

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      I won’t have time to watch 12 until late tonight, but I admit all the negative reactions make me perversely eager to see it. I do love a good trainwreck (and sometimes even a bad trainwreck).

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    Ep 11 was mostly good! Only at the every end did it drop!

    5
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    drugs of the wrong kind. Someone burnt a makjang script to ashes and they snorted it up. Don’t do makjang kids, it’s bad for your health.

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      This implies they were doing drugs of the good king beforehand and honestly, good for them. Hope they stay safe from the roaming cops trying to start their own version of the war on drugs.

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      Somebody had a beakup and decided to beat-up the drama OTP too … along with the smidgen of logic which was holding the plot together?? 🙄

      Or drugs yeah … you have the best explanation Cecee.

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    Exactly! Also, 13-14! The shift is jarring; shaking my head! 11-12 focused on cheaters, 13-14 on committing murder. Only 2 more episodes to go…can the writers wrap this up effectively?

    By the way, Na In-Woo’s husky voice is so enticing. Just to see him in another role, I watched “Her Bucket List” but he didn’t use that breathy tone for the character he portrayed. It seems he may have another leading role coming up in “See You After Work.”

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Oh boy. This is not nerve-wracking at all. Nope. Definitely not.

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    Went up to 77 by the time I hit send 😭.

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      LOL! I had 69 when I woke up the other morning (in about 9 hours) and another 20+ an hour later and I wondered if I’d started WWIII somehow but there’s just a lot of activity on the board right now.

      Did you say something provocative on someone’s fanwall?

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        Comment was deleted

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        Not that I know of (yet). I was just away for two days or so and I come back to this. I love everyone engaging with my insane comments, but guys, this is kind of terrifying.

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          I just did a quick scan and I had about 225 in the last 48 hours. 😵 I don’t think it’s me, there’s just a lot going on here and I doubt I’m an outlier. I compulsively read every reply and at least look at the link for every notif – do you? – and while I love that beanies are reading and reacting, it’s also A LOT.

          I love your (not) insane comments – it’s nice to see you around.

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            Aww, thank you for reading my insane takes. It’s always nice to know people like reading my comments 🥺.

            I’m also a compulsive reader of replies and that’s mostly why the high notification numbers terrify me. Just so much to respond to!

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            I feel the need to click through every notification too! Because sometimes it’s another like on something that’s gotten a lot of love lately, but other times it’s a random old comment on a random old weecap and then I want to see if there is anything new there! Or at least, that’s what I tell myself to justify the compulsion.

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      Maybe there’s a conversation going in one of your comments? Sometimes that happens in recaps. Someone replies to my comment and then other people reply to them, and they start talking and notifications get crazy.
      It’s worse if it is a comment on your own post because then you get double notifications of everything.

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        Something like that is happening now *after* I saw the notifs for this. Thank god I was able to avoid the numbers for that. Last thing I need is 3-digit notifs.

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          I always read replies too and check the likes as often people like when they have popped in to add their own comment so it means I don’t miss the latest comments on a weecap etc. I actually am opposite to you and like the batch notifications as I find it is much easier to do a bulk read through especially when the site is working well than popping in and out and facing stress if it’s a glitchy day. It is definitely harder on the days when I am busy so can’t sit down and relax and respond properly and enjoy reading the responses.
          Maybe having extra time at random points due to insomnia helps☺️

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        The funniest to me is when someone replies to a comment I’ve made on my post, and they mention me in it – so three notifications!

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    well look at you being all popular

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      WE ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ YOU CECEE

      When I got my very first thumbs-up here, I hovered my cursor over it expecting it to show me the username for who gave it to me (other sites do this) but instead I accidentally thumbs-upped my own comment, which was super embarrassing and made me feel like such a pathetic loser when I discovered I couldn’t take it back. I still fret about that one extra thumb in my lifetime total. But it’s probably better that I can’t easily see who “likes” my comments outside the Notifications tab, because then I’d fret about that, too. 😵‍💫

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        Haha, I’ve done that a few times already and.. yes, just like you, when I click to remove it, I just get the “comment already upvoted” notifications… in case I loved myself so much I really wanted to like my comment twice.
        Anxious clicking all the way!!!

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I blink and suddenly it’s the first week of December and I already missed like half of the 2023 roundup smh.

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Oh no, I loved the premiere episodes of Soundtrack #2 and not just because Noh Sang-hyun is finer than a tall glass of water. I am well and truly doomed.

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    😉

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    Me toooo!! He is 👌🏽 though not going to lie, thought I was safely on team ML but SML didn’t take long to charm either – what to do now 🫠

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      The SML was charming, but I don’t really see him romantically with our FL – yet. I like them as creative partners.

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        Same here! I was pleasantly surprised at how much I liked it. I’ve never seen NSH before – damn, that is a fine man, and his pettiness is a delicious contrast to his chiseled looks. The SML is cute and charming, but as always Men > Boys.

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          His pettiness was hilarious (for now) and I get it! He’s obviously not over the breakup and never got any clear answer for why it happened. I’m so happy to watch an actual, honest-to-god romance without serial killers, cops or past lives forcing their way through to ruin the fun (aka NSH’s face… good god. He’s got the stop-in-my-tracks-and-collapse-in-public sort of handsomeness).

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          I’ve seen NSH in something before, but it’s killing me that I can’t figure out what drama it was, lol.

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        I can see FL and SML forming a mutual admiration society professionally, but end game still looks to be the ML — after they work through the reasons for their first breakup. Dating the SML would be easier for the FL right now — if we’re evaluating the triangle — but working through her unresolved issues with the ML seems connected to regaining her capacity to have dreams for her future.

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    Oh boy, guess I’ll have to search for my Disney/Hulu login info.

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    I’ve only seen the first one so far, but I love it, too. It’s like ASMR with a real story.

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    I love it too! It’s giving me Jane Austen’s Persuasion vibes (and that’s my favorite novel of all time, so definitely here for that)

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      Good comparison! There’s something richly satisfying about second-chance romance. It didn’t take Soundtrack long to make me fully invested in the characters.

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      omg YES I SEE IT NOW!!! great observation!! 👏 also my favourite Austen novel, can’t believe I didn’t see the parallel

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      Persuasion is such a great comparison here! It’s also my favourite Austen work so that explains my overall positivity for the show.

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Perfect Marriage Revenge, you beautiful bastard (affectionate). Thank you for all the memories and restoring my faith in dramas. Maybe dramas can be well-written and funny and entertaining all the way through. A highlight of 2023 for sure.

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    To the wider PMR DB community, thanks for all the amazing posts and commentary! I’ll miss them just as much as the drama itself.

    Lastly, to my beloved Sexretary Kim, I hope I’ll see you very very soon in a good drama ❤️❤️.

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Still waiting for Castaway Diva to officially release Lee Re\’s Dream Us as part of the official OST. I need it.

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Castaway Diva is pissing me off and I don\’t know if even Park Eun-bin can get me through the very end.

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    Same here … I’m hanging on with a thread only for Park Eun-bin, but for how long 🤷‍♀️

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      See, she’s become a huge part of what’s pissing me off and I’m pretty sure I’ll have to drop, Potato Boy or no Potato Boy. At the moment the only characters I like are the nice parents.

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        Parents are the only wholesome part but they too would have a backstory.
        If Mok-ha was played by any other actress it would have been a drop already.
        But then it seems Potato Boy is putting a stop to the lip-synching nonsense.

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I LOVE the PMR challenge on the fan wall. It\’s always so much fun when a community is formed around an underrated show. And @attiton, I second your thirst for the sexy NOT-evil secretary.

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Ummm so I’ve been trying in vain to respond to a comment on the recent The Story of Park’s Marriage Contract, but even after hitting ‘send’ my responses don’t show up on the wall. What’s up with that? Am I violating some new rule or something? Is DB glitching again?

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Oh my god it worked. I’m actually in. After weeks of glitching and not loading anytime I tried to come here, DB is working. Can’t wait to start catching up everything… eventually.

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Wow, My Lovely Liar is really pushing the enemies-to-lovers trope to its extremes, pairing a Manchester fan and Liverpool fan together. I’m sure that deep-seated, decades-long rivalry won’t cause problems in the relationship at all lmao. I got a good chuckle out of Sol-hee thinking Do-ha might poison her because she was a Manchester fan. I hope they continue the football references.

While watching the football scenes, I kept getting flashbacks to another beloved dreamland couple who bonded over a mutual love of football. I know that I’m setting expectations catastrophically high by comparing these two pretty lovebirds to Ji-ho and Se-hee from Because This Life is Our First, but I just want that feel that undeniable magic again from a drama couple. I think a lot of recent drama couples have been missing that lightning strike moment where you just know in your bones that the actors and characters are a perfect match and you are about to watch a romance for the ages. I want the leads from My Lovely Liar to be that lightning strike for me. Kim So-hyun and Hwang Min-hyun look so freaking cute together! I can’t help it. Even if the show (almost definitely) won’t live up to that comparison, I hope at least this second football-loving couple is comparably memorable.

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See You in My 19th Life. I’m caught up now and honestly, the only part still holding my full attention is the slow-burn secondary ‘romance’ of Ha Do-yoon and Yoon Cho-won. And I desperately need Do-yoon to get his shit together and finally kiss her, ask her out, and grovel at her feet for forgiveness for being a cowardly noble idiot (not necessarily in that order). I should be beyond irritated by Do-yoon’s halfhearted excuses, but I’m a sucker for angsty, pining morons who suffer in silence. I swear to God, If they end this show without letting them kiss; or worse, them not getting together, this will instantly become my most hated show of the year. “Quality” be damned.

As for the leads… well… they certainly are characters that exist. I cannot bring myself to care all that much for them as a couple or their past-lives/truck of doom murder mystery/bad corporate corruption entanglements. Which is disappointing since both Shin Hye-sun and Ahn Bo-hyun are fine actors doing a good job here (ABH doing a particularly great job portraying Seo-ha’s complex PTSD and grief), but I just CANNOT make myself to root for them as an OTP. Something about them together just lack that spark, that natural charm, for me that makes me drawn to an onscreen couple and which their second lead counterparts have in spades instead.

The more I think about it, the more I’m convinced 19th Life is the rare drama that actually needed a 16 episode runtime instead of a shortened 12. A lot of the reincarnation/historical worldbuilding comes off as hurried info-dumping and messy writing interrupting an otherwise solid story, which really shouldn’t be the case in a modern fantasy story. There’s just way too much going on and not enough time to properly wrap up the myriad of side-plots, which results in all of them feeling stifled and rushed. And very little screentime for my favourite Do-yoon/Cho-won OTP!! I demand more than the few crumbs we get each episode!!!

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    As a sidenote, I am SO HAPPY I finally had the free time and energy to be able to catch up to an ongoing drama. I feel strangely accomplished for being able to come to a safe enough place to do that. As for the my next show to catch up… Heartbeat, you’re next.

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      It’s stupid how much I’m enjoying Heartbeat.

      I really liked See You in My 19th Life in the beginning but quickly stopped being able to take it seriously. Now my friends and I just laugh the whole time we watch.

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    You are dead right. Also, the way that the mistress was designated as the sole culpable person was beyond a joke. The father and the uncle were just ‘ensnared’ by her and she was solely responsible. That was just appalling. She is an awful character but she was empowered by the powers that be and cultivated. To portray her as the seductress luring the men is such a misogynistic trope.

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      The writing for all the female characters in this drama feels… off to me for a number of reasons. But yes, the mistress character is the most egregious example. Making her solely responsible because she’s oh-so evil and seductive and actually the men were alright is so unbelievably stupid as to be nonsensical. These are grown ass men! In charge of a conglomerate!! The writer completely misunderstands how corruption and white-collar crime works in such higher-up positions and tried to cover for that lack of knowledge with pure, unadulterated misogyny. It’s honestly pathetic to watch.

      That being said, the hotel corruption side-plot is so yawn-inducing, boring and unnecessary to me that I’ve FF-ed through most of it. Seo-ha has enough going on without tacking on some halfhearted workplace dramatics. Which means the one silver lining has been me skipping past the most misogynistic parts.

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        Hotel plot: If they did want to go there they should have focused on showing us how he was rebuilding/rebranding the hotel along with Bang Jim. It would have been nice to see them work together rather than spending so much time on this murder plot which seemed pointless by the time we reached the end.

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      That whole arc was anti climactic and made no sense to me. He literally spent his entire life driven by guilt and trauma and the family just watched it because?????
      I don’t blame her at all. She stole some money, yeah. But that’s a much milder crime compared to what Seo-Ha’s family inflicted on him. And the fathers smile??? Weird. Just weird.

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    THIS ☝🏼

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    I agree with your analysis here, good job. I had high hopes for this show, but my enthusiasm (and expectations) are waning as I watch each new episode. The story is just written too poorly. I do like seeing our “Sunshine” (Ha Yoon-kyung) in her role here.

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    This is so well said and I agree completely! I also am only invested in the second couple at this point.

    I personally think the issue wasn’t the 12 eps but rather shoving in too many storylines. If they’d stuck to the webtoon plot I think they would have been fine. Or at least less time devoted to pools, car accident flashbacks, and Ji-eum’s past lives.

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      They definitely shoved in way too many unnecessary subplots, agreed. Maybe a 12 episode run could’ve worked if they kept the story concise and focused, but alas, they wanted to shove in every kdrama trope imaginable.

      I’m not familiar with the original source material, but it has been eye-opening and informative to read your posts and comments comparing the drama to the webtoon. I feel bad for fans like you who must’ve been so excited to see an onscreen adaptation, only for the writer to veer off into a completely different direction. If only they stuck to the canon…

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        Right? And even though you weren’t familiar with the comic, you still perceived the core problem: the drama is now about predestination and fate. They not only dropped the theme of the source material, but they made it the opposite. And most of the things that people are disliking seem to be things that the drama added.

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        Also, thank you for the empathy! I had such high hopes for this adaptation. I should have known after Kiss Sixth Sense, but I thought that was just a bad drama. I thought this had such great talent behind it, how could it not be good? And the first few episodes really got my hopes up, too, before it started to go off of the rails. Although I should say there were a few changes at the beginning that I thought would be a bigger problem later on (like changing Cho-won’s character), and that turned out to be supported.

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          I get your pain. Outside of kdramas, I’ve also had many favourite novels adapted for tv or the big screen – only for it to be an utter mess and fundamentally misunderstanding the very nature of the stories. I understand completely that adapting a story means some things require changing, but changing essential elements and key plot points is just dumb. Why do these writers keep thinking they would do better than the original creators?!?

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Heads up, guys, I’m about to be weirdly personal and overshare on details of my life that doesn’t quite relate to kdramas, so feel free to skip my (inevitably) very long post. I get that posting about it to strangers on the internet probably isn’t the healthiest route, but my anonymity makes me feel safe here – and you guys have always been so kind and supportive before. I’m not at a place where I feel comfortable sharing with the people in my life, so everyone here now has to be subjected to my pity party. Possible trigger warnings for topics like mental health and money troubles, if anybody wants to avoid that.

Because of some weird mishaps with my financial documents that nobody can still explain to me in a simple and concise manner, I am now in severe debt. I lost all life savings and had to drop out of university as I am no longer financially at a place where I can pursue and pay for higher education. I have also had to sell off important belongings and make radical changes to my lifestyle I once couldn’t have even imagined. I have always been poor; my immediate family have been working-class for as long as I can remember, but I have never experienced poverty at this level. It’s dehumanizing, it’s debilitating, and it’s awful. It’s more awful than I could ever express with words and I hate, hate, hate it so much. I am genuinely at risk of not being able to pay rent any month now and can no longer afford basic groceries I once used to enjoy splurging on. The only reason I am not constantly hungry is because of the help of a very kind neighbour who has taken it upon herself to feed me in my time of crisis, which I am infinitely grateful for and am also humiliated by. All my life, it has been drilled into my head by my parents that I must be independent, smart and resourceful so that I will never have to be at the mercy of others. Now, not only am I none of those things, I am also a college dropout with crippling money and mental health issues who is estranged from her family. And it happened nearly overnight.

I used to find it unrealistic when some dramas showed their protagonist’s life dramatically worsening overnight. “That would never happen to someone!” I used to think, “People are smarter than that in real life, they would have support systems and savings and life experience. They can stay afloat.” Well, I learned the harshest lesson of my life yet. Support systems can fail. Savings can deplete. Life experience can be pointless. I have friends from high school and former university, I have a roof over my head (for now), and I have connections worldwide through the internet and yet I have never felt so alone, so isolated. It truly feels like me against the world and I don’t think I can win this fight. I now have multiple part-time jobs, working all day and often nights too and most times I am so exhausted that I can do nothing but immediately fall asleep the moment I sit down. I have now started taking short naps during my work breaks instead of socializing and catching up with colleagues because I am so exhausted and so embarrassed about my financial situation. I know most people would probably sympathize and some might even try to help, but the thought of looking a friend in the eye and saying that I need help is somehow more frightening than anything I’m going through. And isn’t that just fucking ridiculous? I know realistically that this is not my fault, that there’s nothing wrong with struggling, or being poor, or being mentally ill, and I would never, ever judge someone else going through the same problems, but my own shame is debilitating.

Today has been my first day off from all my jobs in a while and the first day in a while I have done anything at home that wasn’t passing out or crying until I pass out. I had to be reminded by my neighbour that yesterday was Eid ul-Fitr and immediately I was so ashamed for missing such an important day. I have never been very religious since I was a child and my queerness has recently made openly practicing difficult in such a conservative and traditional community. Even then, I always observed Eid. I fast during the month of Ramadan and make sure to prioritize praying the mandatory five times at least during that time. I partake in Eid prayers and always make sure to give gifts and greet my cousins, aunts/uncles, nieces/nephews, friends and acquaintances. I think this was the first Eid in my life that has passed without me observing in some way shape or form and the guilt is crushing. I feel like I have lost myself and I don’t know what to do. Eid is usually a time for joy and celebration for me, a break from my worldly troubles, but now I feel like I cannot remember the last time I felt real happiness. My only task now is to work myself ragged everyday and pay my debts before I lose what little I have left. I finally had the chance to look at my phone and see the messages people sent me yesterday and I still cannot bring myself to feel happy about it because I just feel so bad for not remembering. Even my mother reached out for the first time in weeks; the first time since I told her about my debts and she blamed me for being lazy and stupid. Instead of feeling euphoric and hopeful, I only felt bitter and resentful. How does someone feel like that towards their own mother? Someone I thought I loved deeply for my entire life. I feel empty inside, unable to have emotions or form human connections anymore. Nothing to live for except paying off creditors.

I could write even more about things going on, but I think I have already written way more than is normal or safe to strangers on the internet about my life. I think I might try to watch an episode from a show before going to sleep. God knows I won’t have time for that in upcoming months. Love you guys, this place has consistently been awesome and I value all the years I spent here commenting, sharing, analyzing and fangirling over the media we love (and love to hate). I hope I can come back to doing so one day and that it’s sooner than I anticipate. Hey, maybe my mom will stop blaming me and actually start helping or something! Miracles could happen.

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    Looking at my last post… I was so naive to think things would stabilize enough for me to actually sit down and watch these shows. It’s mentally impossible for me to process just much things have changed for the worst in only two weeks.

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      All those changes are incredibly hard. So hard you’ve missed something important to you because you’re overwhelmed and probably grieving all you’ve lost.

      You are not lazy or unintelligent and bad things happen to the best of us without it being our fault. Please be as kind as you can to yourself.

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    Sorry that I have no useful suggestions to give you, but I hope you get the strength to pull through this situation. Remember that “This too shall pass”.

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    Hey friend (I don’t know how to tag you), even though I don’t know what to tell you to ease out your emotional agony as money troubles are the ultimate reality of life that one can’t run away from, I kind of understand as someone who has seen a lot ‘instability’ (financial and otherwise). I understand how it is harder when you have seen better days. And I can only sympathise with you for the drudgery you have to undertake to stay afloat. This might sound like an empty word to you, but instead of feeling dehumanised, consider yourself a braver human than you have been till now. I have not seen trouble of this magnitude because I went through instability with my family as whole. I am guessing you are an international student or living far from home to pursue studies, and that I understand, makes you alone in this struggle. So as things are for you, (I hope I am not patronising) do anything to survive for now. Ease your mind off of the embarassment of asking for help, as you are doing enough on your end to keep yourself afloat and you deserve a little help. Whatever happens, be sure to be full so you have the emotional energy to deal with the day.

    I don’t want to give you hopes of a “miracle”, but when it comes to looking forward to help from family, I have learnt you never need one. They would come around to help you in whichever they can. Don’t be disappointed in your mom for her initial reaction. She is the person you need to trust the most in these times, and you just need to open up to her and vent. Please try this on your end atleast! We are never grown ups for our family, and you need the support of yours, even if it is just emotional support. You will feel a lot less lonely!

    Please forgive me for being an advice machine. But try all your options! And don’t be disheartened if some of them don’t work the way you had imagined. You have already seen that life doesn’t always go on as planned, yet you are here today surviving through something unimaginable. You are the best judge of your life, but if repriortising and replanning some things takes off the weight off your mind or your pocket, please do! Do whatever you can to survive for now.

    Adding a small dose of courage to the big one you already have ❤. Be sure to keep replenishing yourself with the best diet and rest you can afford. That is something non negotiable for every precious person like you.

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      😭 You gave so good advice!

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      Your advice and words of sympathy and solidarity mean the world to me. I am happy to report that I have recently reached out to some trusted friends of mine and their unending support since has lifted a huge burden off my shoulders. While my relationship with my mom is still… complicated, for the first time in a long while, I can at least imagine a world one day where I am debt-free and stable. And I’ll second what @mmmmm said: your advice is amazing! Thank you so much for all your words of kindness and care.

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        Hey you are doing better already 🙂. The world of adulting is hard. Just take this as a difficult lesson. We all have to learn to take care of ourselves at some point, and I am glad you are doing so good at it 👍.

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    First, I am the reigning *queen* of the beanie dramatic over share. You are welcome in my kingdom any time.
    But it sucks to be here.

    I know exactly how you feel. I have a friend (all of my friends and family, really). We’re the same age, graduated from college and grad school at the same time. Except somehow she’s living in her second house and just got home from 10k vacation.
    Meanwhile? Over in isa-land? My church paid my rent for 2 months in a row.

    Here’s the thing, I did what were all taught to do: I got the education and the higher education. I got the job that was supposed to keep crippling poverty and debt from my door. The most realistic thing about those dramas we all watch and those Candy’s we all love to laugh at is how fucking quickly it can all fall apart.
    Isa! Why do you need someone to pay your rent? Aren’t you making more money than you ever have?
    Yep. Sure am.
    But my car was stolen for the 3rd time, my insurance isn’t honoring their commitment, and my car won’t have parts until OCTOBER. It won’t be fixed until NOVEMBER. In the meantime? I’m paying over 1k a month in transportation fees. It’s not sustainable. I’m bumming rides as much as I can but I’ve learned on average coworkers and church friends are willing to give 3 rides before they start heading in the other direction when they see me coming. SO I don’t ask for rides. If someone offers I thank them and leave a few dollars in their car.
    Meanwhile, my mental and physical health are TRASH. I have diabetes but can’t afford the mess and even if I could? I have no way to pick them up. And I find that I don’t really care because my depression and self esteem are at an all time low.
    And about that apartment I’m living in. It’s horrible. Right now there are mice and spiders (probably my fault as depression makes it hard as he’ll to keep things as clean as they should be). The dishwasher and oven don’t work. The washing machine and the dryer are both faulty. Isa! Why don’t you move, girl? Because all of my money goes to uber/lyfts so that I can get to work. I can’t even save my money to meet my deductible whenever my car does get fixed. I’ve begged. BEGGED for advice. Not money. Just tell me what the f to do because I’m tired and I just don’t know anymore.
    There’s more. You know. There’s always more.
    I don’t have advice for you. But I *see* you. I so fully and completely understand. My mom has been gone many years but I do have a brother. My brother begged me to come to this state so I can help take care of our failing father (and I can help you, isa! You’ll be right down the street!) but the 3 times I’ve asked for help in 10 months I’ve been laughed out of the room.
    It’s hard. It’s SO HARD.
    You’re not a failure. You have done absolutely nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed of. Keep putting one foot in front of the other. If you don’t have the energy or the head space to watch dramas? Then don’t. Sleep. I watch fame shows because they require nothing from me. I list

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      I listen to audiobooks because I don’t have the energy to read.
      I sleep because it’s the closest I can get to death without having to have a conversation with my therapist. I’m sorry things are so hard.

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      Happy to join the kingdom of oversharing! Feels nice to not be alone and I always did love reading your detailed posts.

      I wish I didn’t relate to your situation so intimately, but god, reading about your life and finding parallels between my current situation and those of many of my friends is so tough. It’s annoying to openly admit it, but its just so hard to see other people who took the same path as me thriving and succeeding and happy while I am suffering and barely going through the day, wishing to end it all. And the part about the uncaring family… yeah I get it. I have been estranged from my father for over a decade now (he was abusive and eventually left my mom for another woman) and my relationship with my mother has steadily gotten more and more toxic over the years to the point that we can barely have a proper conversation. Obviously, she hasn’t been very helpful with my problems.

      Isa, I hope you don’t take this the wrong way because I mean this in the sincerest way possible, it is SO comforting to find someone who relates, who understands, the sort of hardship I am going through. You just *got* what I was going through and how terrible my physical and mental state is. And something about that makes me feel less alone. I hope things get better for you as well and one day, we both will be in a better place and can look back to these days as simply a hard patch in our lives.

      Sending you all my love and solidarity.

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    This sounds amazingly tough and if it’s happened this quickly you must still be in shock. Please don’t be embarrassed about your change in circumstances – sometimes things like this blindside us, and it can feel like we don’t deserve to look for help, but that’s absolutely not the case. It’s okay to not have solutions immediately when you’ve just got to keep your head above water. I know it’s easy to say these things (and to know them academically) but living through it is much harder, so wishing you all the best. You can do it.

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      Thank you for your kindness! It was definitely the shock of a lifetime and I’m still processing everything that’s happened. I have gradually reached out to some people I trust and getting some of the burden off my shoulders has been a relief.

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    I am so sorry to hear this. And shocked. I can’t even begin to imagine. But you didn’t give up. You are working and you are doing everything to keep afloat. You are stronger than you know.
    I can’t speak about shame. But there are times seeking help is ok. If you had a friend who needed help you would right? So take help temporarily, buy yourself some time and take the kindness you can find. Someday you will be in a position to offer your kindness to others.
    They say once you hit rock bottom you can only go up from there. I will be hoping and wishing for you. May things get better at your end.
    Don’t hesitate to come and chat here.

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      Thank you! I have recently reached out to friends of mine and so my situation has gotten slightly better. My internalized shame really was the thing holding me back and starting to deal with it has made things easier.

      I think I can be more active on DB these days. I’m sure I’ll end up chatting endlessly soon enough!

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    Eid Mubarak! I don’t know where you are in the world but we celebrate three days of Eid so it’s still Eid here. Get yourself a good cup of coffee and a slice of cake and celebrate it in your own way. Also, DB is still your tribe, let it out here whenever you want to. You are going through a tough time but this will pass and good times lie hard, there is ease after hardship. Wishing you the best and keeping you in my prayers.

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    Wishing you loads of love and good spirits, may God ease your burden soon. There will be a reward for your patience in these hard times. Please please dont be ashamed of needing help..today may be your day of need but in the future you could be the one giving help to others ❤️ also, Happy Eid to you!

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      Thank you and a happy belated Eid Mubarak! I have reached out for help and my situation has gotten a bit better recently. And yes, maybe I can help out others in a similar position in the future.

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        ❤️ I’m so glad you did and i hope you have a relief for now. May things get better and you can continue doing what you want, be it your studies or other things that suits you.

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    *pats back*

    I hear you. ( a short sentence that made me feel much better at a time I needed it from @pickledragon a long while ago)

    Besides from wonderful advice many Beans here gave you already, I’d like to add just some more things.

    During this crisis, I believe deep down you know who you should seek help from. Do it and do it with everyone you feel you can trust. As others have already wisely pointed out, there are times when help should be sought from others, and times we should stand on our own feet. I say this is the time for you to seek necessary help from those you know deep down in your guts that you can trust. And take it in all shapes and forms. You need this in order to help you able to stand on your feet again.

    The first step you already took is posting about this on your fan wall. It’s the way you, the very real you, tells you to, as it is said in The Real Has Come, hold on to your dear life. Bravo for the very good first step!

    Second, I think I hate, resent, hold grudge, against my mom for whatever bad things that happened in my life. 😂 I just told my good friend about this, and I realized it is easy to find someone to blame for all my misfortune. This is me though, not you and your situation. What I wanted to say is that it’s normal to resent your mom. Not ideal, but it’s normal.

    Third, I’d probably point this out to you as you might be too tired to notice this, and I think it’s easier to see from the third person’s pov: I think you need to seek some sound financial advice and planning. You mentioned you didn’t even understand why you were in this situation in the first place, and you still don’t have any good and healthy plan to pay off your debt without jeopardizing your health. I really think you need a plan. You can’t work yourself ragged. That is unhealthy and unsustainable. I’d say you need some sound advice to ease your life and at the same time pay off the debt gradually. I’m not sure about this, but there should be someone who can give you or she’d light into the way that is better than the current way. I apologize because I’m not very good with financial stuff, but I truest think you need a good plan.

    Many Beans here have been with me through thick and thin since a couple years ago and I can never be grateful enough. I’d say you are in good hands. 😁

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      I forgot to add that I love my mom. 🥰 I resent her at times, and love her also. You can say I have a complicated relationship with my mom LOL. Despite that, she is the person I love the most in the world.

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      Thank you for hearing me. It truly does make me feel better and seen.

      I *did* know the people I should, I could, reach out to for help and I have recently started getting over my internalized shame and guilt and just do it and I am so, so glad to have done it. A close friend of mine is financially secure enough to have offered to pay most of my rent and that enormous act of kindness has genuinely been life-saving for me. Now I can really focus on paying off my debt without fears of imminent homelessness.

      My relationship with my mother is… complicated. She has sacrificed a lot for me and has done through hell and back during her marriage, but right now, we are just not in a position for reconciliation. One day, I’m sure we can look back to these days and have a healthy conversation (and maybe family therapy) about our issues, but now is not that time. She has hurt me too much.

      You’re absolutely right about financial planning. My mother was wrong for shaming me for my financial illiteracy and calling me stupid, but clearly something went terribly wrong for me to end up where I am. I am thinking of reaching out to financial advisors from my university when I get time off work. That may not magically solve things, but I need all the help I can get and I learned the hard way that inaction will only make things worse.

      Beanies have been so kind and understanding and supportive of me through all this and I cannot thank you and every single other person who commented and wrote the loveliest messages enough. I am so, so unbelievably grateful towards each and every one of you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

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    The feelings of shame and humiliation are natural when we are constantly bombarded with messages that it’s our own fault for our circumstances. And that toxic message is compete and utter bullshit. Asking for help is hard, but if you feel safe to talk to someone who is understanding, I think you should. Feeling alone is terrifying and please don’t feel guilt for asking for help. I felt some of these emotions when I was going through opioid withdrawal, I felt ugly, weak and humiliated. The shame of being an addict and the stigma attached to it didn’t help. But I had a supportive sister, someone who I could count on and didn’t judge me. I hope you have someone like that in your life. I don’t know if this is appropriate but I would like to help you financially if that’s okay, to at least help you pay some of your rent? I can transfer $1000AUD to your PayPal or some other account you prefer?
    Please don’t take this as pity or charity, I grew up in a working class household and the financial help we got from friends went a long way. We are all in this together as a community and as a fellow beanie helping each other is how we build each other up

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      Omigosh you’re so kind (and capable!). I’m not sure I’m in a position to suggest this, but if you asked me I would want ladynightshade to take this money, feel loved, and repay the money when she can in the future. It’s a helping hand from a fellow Beanie friend. I mean I am not sure how much that is, but I’m sure it’ll help.

      I’m so grateful I am in this community.

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        It would’ve helped so much! We are a loving, close-knit community in the truest sense of the word and I couldn’t be happier to be a part of it. Just knowing that there are people out there who offered to help, people who truly cared, means everything to me. This community has become a haven of strength and support in my life now.

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      Wow, I am speechless. What you offered is so unbelievably kind and life-changing, I am in tears. Thank you, thank you, thank you so much. I have recently reached out to a friend and she is now helping me pay my rent for the time being, so I can decline your offer of financial support, but please know that I will always remember how you offered to help me during this time of crisis. To have gone through what you have and come out strong and with the compassion and empathy you have… you are one of the kindest, strongest people I have ever had the pleasure of interacting with. God bless you. When I first started posting on DB, I never would’ve imagined joining such a loving community of supportive, working-class people from around the world, but now I can safely say that it was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made.

      Once again, thank you so much for offering assistance. Please know that you have my endless gratitude for the helping hand you extended. And if you are ever in any need of financial help in the future, I will try my best to lend a helping hand should my situation improve.

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    To you, and to anyone who needs to hear (read this)—
    I don’t frequent DB much anymore, so if we haven’t met and you don’t feel like my words are solicited, that’s okay! But here goes:

    Remember to be kind to yourself.
    I know, the world thinks that is the most absolutely absurd and most selfish thing to do, but take it from me, a person who’s constantly quietly struggling with my mental health, physical health, has high function anxiety, has generational trauma, and a boatload of other things that I have been condition to not feel like sharing because of said childhood trauma of being dismissed all the time and being told that I was “too young to understand anything that was going on”. Being kind to ourselves, letting ourselves feel, to be in the moment, to have a cry, to have a slump day, to feel shit is all along the process of healing, getting better, and getting back to being at 100%. And it is when we are at 100% can we be there for others and be there for ourselves to make sure we are sound and making good decisions for ourselves and also have the mental capacity to understand that, yea, life is shit sometimes and not everything will go our way but that the present moment is what matters and is what we need to focus on and what to live life for. All of this “reminiscing the past” and “looking forward to/planning for the future” stuff isn’t necessarily bad, but it isn’t necessarily always the best course of way to live either, especially with social media in addition to society setting all of these “timelines” and “checklists” as to what people should have accomplished and have done before a person is at X stage in life or is X years old. Hard no to ALL of that. I call bullshit. Life is meant to be lived in a way wherein our paths are not straight/linear, but is meant to have many valleys and plateaus, many twists and turn, many lessons to be had and lessons to show. Life is meant to be lived and felt. If we all lived the same way and all followed the same timeline and milestones, we wouldn’t be humans with flesh and blood, we’d be no different than robots. There will be times where we will be kimchi slapped in the face with a dose of humility (the lessons to be had) but there will also be moments wherein we will shine even brighter than the rock the K-drama hero presents the Candy during their proposal/wedding. Feeling things is also a part of the process— shame, sadness, the feeling of the unknowns, loss of control… you can name it, it will probably be felt. But just like how others don’t know our full story or circumstances, we also don’t know there’s or their reasons behind their reactions/decisions in the face of us. We just have to take it at face value as it is and move on, otherwise the over-analyzing and overthinking of other people’s reactions to us will indeed bury us. I know this all too well as a person with high functioning anxiety, over sensitivity (in ALL sense of the word), and being a deep empath.

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      All of that is to say, yes, there are practical and realistic things to be done, to be considered, and things to be had so that we are not in tough situations, but there also needs to be compassion, grace, love, understanding… and a whole lot of coffee/tea and chocolate to make it all come together and work 💕

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      You are such a good writer! And yes, your words are absolutely solicited and wanted, even if we haven’t interacted in the past (I think? I apologize if we did and I don’t remember – I’ve been here for a while now). How you described life as a series of valleys and plateaus is exactly right. I may be struggling right now, but this only means things can steadily, eventually get better and I can one day find peace and happiness. I have struggled in the past (and in the present, tbh) with being kind to myself and my mental health is infamously unstable amongst people who know me, but I am slowly starting to realize that hating myself hasn’t done anything but bring me misery and trap me in a vicious cycle of self-hatred and suicide attempts. It *will* take a long time and a lot of work for the message to internalize, but I am starting to try. Thank you for your lovely words of kindness and empathy.

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    I just wish the best for you ❤️ You are smart and resourceful and independent- it clearly shows! You are working and fighting. And you are sharing. Always know that you have a community here who will listen

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    I hope you will see the offer of offline help from @linnarrick and find a way to connect. They have their own story of tough times and now they are in a different space having had support they want to carry it forward.

    The power of shame is real, but I am praying that now you have shared a condensed version of your current situation you will feel able to keep heading towards others. Isolation leaves us vulnerable because the negative voices will be at full volume with nothing to drown them out. I hope you will feel able to access free support from professional services. Not easy if you are living in another culture to your own or worried about discrimination.

    At this time your battery is not charging and it sounds like you are trying to operate at 100% when your reality is 10%. This is the point when the phone battery will run out suddenly and it’s the same for humans hence you having to deal with the effects of sleep deprivation and mental health symptoms when you least have the ability to address the needs they are flagging.

    I hope seeing the responses from those who are also in the struggle has helped you to know, it’s not the weak or those that are lacking that have to endure, but any one of us, at any time can find ourselves walking this road.

    Sorry I missed this important post in amongst the busyness and bad connections. Take care.

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      Please don’t apologize for missing the post! This is an active community constantly buzzing about important drama updates and thoughts, that’s perfectly understandable. The fact that you even found it and thought to write out your kind message means the world to me.

      Isolation definitely made me vulnerable. Enough for me to reach out online and share my problems here instead of seeking out my friends or acquaintances. But sharing here made me more confident to reach out in real life and I am glad to say that I have found a system of financial support from a close friend of mine, which has taken off a lot of the burden I was facing. It’s still not smooth-sailing or even stable, but it’s a good first step. I have reached out to professional services, but my own dubious financial situation + (I suspect) my immigrant status makes accessibility difficult. It simply takes forever to get the help I need and if I relied on only that, I would have ended up homeless and starving.

      I am definitely mentally, physically and emotionally drained from everything I’ve been through recently and my battery is at an all-time low. Luckily, the added financial support of my friend means that I can maybe, sometimes take one or two less shifts and get some much-needed sleep. That alone has been the greatest comfort for the last few days. I have the time to actually sit down and respond to all the lovely comments here! Things might actually improve!

      Once again, thank you. I hope you take care as well.

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    Thank you for trusting us beanies, and for sharing something that is so difficult to talk about.

    My family went through something, so I can relate to what you are feeling, especially the shame and humiliation I felt. The stifling feeling of not being able to spend on what you wish for. The loss of the sense of security. Refusing to meet friends because I can’t share the expense. I couldn’t make myself open up about it with them because of the galling humiliation I would feel. The utter shame when I had to finally ask them for monetary help.

    Even though I knew I had the best group of friends, their lending money with no questions asked was so surprising. Their vast hearts were so humbling, and though I am very ashamed to borrow, I am so grateful to have such friends. When I first shared that I was in debt, their easy acceptance of the change in my circumstance was touching, but what truly truly amazed me was how it made absolutely no difference in how they treated me. The ghosts, the fears I had just went poof. I have reached the stage now where I can now easily tell them “I can’t afford it” or “I’m in debt”. So I hope you find the courage to unburden your worries with your friends, just as you found the courage to share with us.

    Faith was and is of huge help to me mentally and emotionally. That God has my back, that even if I don’t have money for my needs, He is still there. I can talk to Him, and share all my worries with Him without the fear of judgement. The eye-opening moment was when my dad said “I was grateful to God when we had abundance, I am grateful now when it’s difficult”. I was struggling and worrying so much about our changed circumstances, and his acceptance and calm were (and are) unfathomable, and sent me on my own journey of rediscovering God. I realised my sense of security came from money and not God. I am still working to put my trust in Him and have faith in Him, that these difficult moments will pass too.

    I hope these Quranic verses offer you some solace. I hope that, even though, right now, you feel disconnected from your family, you feel that your Creator is looking out for you. I hope your family reaches out to you with all the warmth, love and support you need and even more.

    (Chapter 94)
    5. So, verily with every difficulty, there is relief
    6. Verily, with every difficulty there is relief.

    (Chapter 93, this whole chapter is so beautiful, touching and heartening)
    3. Your Guardian-Lord has not forsaken you, nor is he displeased.
    5. And soon will your Guardian Lord give you that with which you will be pleased.
    8. And he found you in need, and made you independent

    Also verse 3:134

    Eid Mubarak to you, may you find serenity, hope and calm in these bleak moments of adversity. And may God truly work miracles for you.

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      Thank you for sharing the Quranic verses. The recent chaos of my life meant that I haven’t really had the time to sit down and pray or read our holy book. You’re right that knowing Allah is out there, looking out for me and everyone I love is immensely comforting. I am not particularly religious myself, but the act of faith and believing still brings me solace during tough times.

      The part about your friends’ unconditional acceptance and help happened with me too. For weeks, I’d been disconnecting from them, ashamed and fearful that they would laugh at me, judge me for my financial situation, even though I knew deep down that they were kind and loving and would jump up to support me in my time of need as I would for them. It is so unimaginably difficult to break away from a lifetime of conditioning to feel guilt over one’s poor circumstances, that we must present a stable image and that to not do so is lazy and improper. Reaching out and finally having the courage to ask for the help I needed has been the best thing I have done: I have relearned anew how loved I am, how there are people in the world who care enough to pay my rent, to offer to move me into their homes, to feed me when I am hungry and broke, to lend a shoulder and hold me when I break down into sobbing fits and panic attacks. In my shame over money and grief over my estranged parents, I forgot I could simply ask for help and that help would be given. I think that is God’s miracle for me. That I am still wanted, still beloved, by those I loved even if they are not related to me.

      A belated Eid Mubarak to you as well, and thank you for sharing your circumstances with me. You put into words the exact feelings of gratitude and helplessness I have been feeling for the past few weeks. May Allah keep you safe during these hard times.

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        So glad to know things have gotten better 🤗
        It’s the same for me, I’m not very religious myself, I only stick to praying 5 times daily. But talking to God continuously about my every tiny worry every other minute, and then listening to His replies in the Qur’an brings so much solace and strength to my agitated soul.

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        Also, did you know that prayers are only a small part of Islam? I recently found out and was dumbfounded. All these years I thought all one had to do was pray, and do some good deeds.

        Then I found out that our bigger purpose is to be a force of good in this world. With whatever ability we’re blessed with, use that to bring positive change around us. Being politically active, raising our voice against any wrongs, gaining and then using our knowledge to help those around us…. Allah actually wants us to be like our drama heroes and heroines 😄

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    My dear, first of all, thanks for sharing with us. We will always be here to listen, to read, and to be by your side.

    I can only say this: be kind to yourself and don’t judge yourself. I know this is easier to said than to be done, but… what would be your words if a third person would come to you with this story. I will tell you: you could use your arms as a shield and you would protect that person and would be by their side just in case.

    So be good and kind to yourself, allow others in, accept the love that is around and don’t think that people would do anything to you just out of pity but out of love, because you deserve all that love.

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    This breaks my heart. It must be incredibly hard to feel so depleted and stressed. I wish I could help you beyond offering words. Even through the anonymity of the internet, your intelligence, wit, complexity and fighting spirit comes through. I understand that it is hard to feel alone especially under your current circumstances but don’t be defeated. Please remember that for many of us life is hard and we hide behind armours of our creation to survive in this world. I don’t know where you are but I hope you have access to universal health care at least. Don’t be stigmatised by mental health challenges. Notwithstanding truly severe mental illness which is debilitating and destabilising to say the least, the rest are and will be manageable. Pretty much everyone I know is mildly nuts and I reger to a wide professional circle and a reasonably sized personal one. I honestly cannot believe we can survive being human – with all of the contradictions and brutalities – with going a bit unhinged.
    Please hang on to hope – I feel hypocritical in sat]ying this as I struggle daily with hope and hopelessness – but I want you to hear my message that your life, you and your brain are precious. Don’t forget that, please. Imagine that your internet friend is holding your hand and giving you a (useless) but comforting hug. I hope that your financial situation eases up. Don’t be ashamed. Poverty is not a character defect. Try and reject that pernicious lie emotionally because you already reject it intellectually. If you can, please ask for help. I know it is not easy asking for help. I suffer from that too but try and see to whom you can turn to. I’m hoping the best for you and am sorry this is so hard.

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      ‘Without going a bit unhinged’. Sorry for the typo.

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      Thank you. Your words of kindness are certainly not unwanted to me. The outpouring of love and concern I’ve gotten from the DB community has been overwhelming and I’ve been left in tears reading each of the beautiful messages of strength and solidarity.

      “I honestly cannot believe we can survive being human – with all of the contradictions and brutalities – with going a bit unhinged.“ It may seem odd, but just hearing that from someone made me feel less alone and lonely. That what I’m going through now won’t ruin the entire life I had (un)planned ahead. We’re all suffering from living in a cruel, capitalist world that pits us against our fellow humans, that rejects helping one another and building each other up. I have already gotten over some of my internalized shame and asked for help from some of my closest friends and their unconditional support and love without judgment has been a life-saver. I knew, deep down, that this would be the case, but it still surprised me. It reminded me that I was not alone in this world, that I was still loved. We truly are our better selves when not isolated from one another.

      Thank you again, for this lovely comment and all the other wonderful and insightful conversations we’ve had over the last year. I always learn something anytime we talk and I cannot wait to resume chatting with you regularly again. Maybe we’ll finally get our long-awaited trade unionist/anarchist Junho drama by then!

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    How are you doing? I’ve been thinking about you, and glad to see your more positive updates.

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      I’m still not doing well, really, but my situation has gotten somewhat less dire recently. I reached out for help and a friend of mine is now helping me pay the bulk of my rent for the time being. The outpouring of love and support I have gotten from both my real-life friends and the beanie community has been so incredible and uplifting. Thank you so much for caring and for actively looking out for my well-being ❤️.

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I am itching for See You in My 19th Life (and Junho King the Land too, I suppose) to start already. Right now it feels like we’re in this interregnum; a calm before the storm of dramas, so to speak. And it’s driving me antsy.

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Bloodhounds was definitely… one of the dramas of 2023 it was only okay and i\’m devastated.

Guess I\’ll have to continue my odyssey of waiting for Woo Do-hwan to pick a good script.

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    so so glad i am not alone
    i am devastated, frustrated, irritated 😤

    let me know if you fund any news abt WDH picking new script.. we can keep out fingers crossed 🤞 for it to be a better one

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      Considering how long we had to wait for the show (three years! – if you count the original Lee Do-hyun + Kwak Dong-yeon casting), it should’ve been better. *huffs in frustration*

      I do hope he gets to work with Lee Sang-yi again one day. Their bromance was by far the best part of the show.

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        oh the original casting was different.. but i am happy it has WDH i cant imagine LDH having such abs-y role…
        but yeah its not upto the mark keeping in mind how much Netflix promoted it…
        i too want Lee Sang Yi and WDH together… in a happy drama.. their bickering would be too good.

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          i cant imagine LDH having such abs-y role…

          Haha… this comment is so spot-on.

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    *sighs*
    *scratches Bloodhounds off the ‘To Watch’ list*

    Thanks for taking one for the team watching and letting us know!!

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      but you gonna miss the uber sweety pie Woo do Hwan.. you can watch first 4 eoisodes then first 20 mints of 7th episodes last 30 minuts of 8th and thats it.. you can have the cake and eat it too.
      cause Woo Do Hwan was at his best (for me) in this drama his acting, his boxing, his cuteness were great and those abs were treat and should be watched n appreciated 🤩🤩🤩
      (not forcing at all.. just trying if i can lure you to watch WDH 🤭🤭🤭)

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        HAHAHAHA your luring is working – I’ll take the crumbs now, especially since you’ve given me a map of which eps/segments to watch!! I’ll just watch those bits like I’m watching a fan edit on YT 😂

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      You’re welcome! *feels better about the whole experience*

      It’s not bad, per say – there’s clearly care behind the production and the fight choreography is genuinely very impressive at times. And all the actors are doing a solid job. It’s just that the writing cannot support the story for eight long hours. I think it could’ve been more concise as a movie.

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        i felt the same.. production and choreography was great but the way a revenge drama should be planned properly wasnt here.
        they stretched all the OGs trying to take revenge when cmthe logic wasnt working there.. it was clearly a mass suicide for me.. everyone just out with their knifes, boxing gloves with no planning per say. not thinking what their opponent is capable of…

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        I actually did think it was a movie initially, along the vibes of Seoul Vibe, the trailer kind of made it seem like it’d be a film.

        But yeah a shame considering it had so much buzz around it, for better or worse. I was so surprised to see it yesterday as number 5 in the Netflix Top 10 TV shows in the country – not many K-dramas make it to that list here often, and very rarely within just a few days of landing on Netflix.

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          initial ranking for me is cause of hype. i too watched till the end hoping it would improve and also that WDH cant choose a bad script…
          from 4th epi onwards i literally had one hand on my head and second punching my bed with disappointment.
          and at heart i was wishing “it will get better.. just one more bad epi, next one would be better for sure” and by the end all i could say “sigh.. glad its done”

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Happy Pride to those of us who celebrate!

I could share some kdrama related LGBTQ+ posts this month if I have the time. I feel like it\’s a topic rarely talked about and this is a great opportunity.

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    YESSSSS!

    I just finished Be Melodramatic and loved the matter-of-factness with which it included the gay male couple. (But where are the lesbians? Other than in Glitch?)

    Happy Pride from San Francisco! ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

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    Definitely do that. It is a pity that some beanies are homophobes (sadly microcosm of the RL) but many others and their allies (such as me) would welcome them. A bit less heteronormativity might just do everyone some good.

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When will the drama gods finally put me out of my misery and give Lee Soo-hyuk the leading man role he so rightfully deserves? We can\’t let that voice go to waste.

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    Not that voice, not that face, and not those acting skills. We need him as the lead NOW. The waiting is over.

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    No but LITERALLY, in almost every show I’ve watched him in he’s eclipsed if not almost eclipsed the leads as far as my attention and emotional investment goes. Main lead when 😭😭😭

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    We desperately need him. Tomorrow was not enough, and even he was supposed to be a lead, his character was really a supporting role as in Doom at your service, and I’m not counting that awful drama Born again.

    Can you imagine him and Junho in a drama together? Their deep voices? Melting.

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      I cannot imagine Lee Soo-hyuk and Junho together in a drama because I would turn into a mushy pile of human goo and cease to function. Please spare some thought for my delicate psyche before suggesting something so dangerous (and oh-so wonderful).

      He barely counts as a supporting player even in Doom at Your Service because his storyline was basically a whole different drama. The writer really just gave up on integrating him into the main story.

      I refuse to acknowledge that other drama you are not counting.

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        Junho and SooHuyk, Junho and SooHyuk, Junho and SooHuyk…

        If I have that image in my head, you do too!!

        😈😈😈😈😈

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      Add Woo Do-hwan into the mix and their voices would just send me straight to heaven.

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Doctor Cha Episode 9. Becoming increasingly more afraid that Jung-sook will forgive her husband and won’t divorce his cheating ass. There’s a bit too much talk of the ‘forgive-and-forget’ method for my comfort. I don’t like it.

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    Episode 10 better put that to rest real quick, is all I’m saying.

    My heart just hurt for Dr Cha. The all around embarrassment at the village and then her having to apologize for In ho’s brand of BS. Then the end of ep 10. Then the PREVIEW. Whew Chile.

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    Fairly confident it won’t happen.
    It’s not that easy to break of relationships especially 20 years of marriage. I can see why she is struggling. It’s still sinking in. And you will see more of this in ep 10.

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    Though I stopped watching in ep4 l, I think, I still think the end result of the show is she divorcing her erm BS husband. There is no way any sane writer can write anything apart from that ending once you showed the audience the man refusing to help his wife on the brink of her death.

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The Good Bad Mother Episode 4. We got our obligatory ‘Lee Do-hyun plays the guitar’ scene, folks. We’re never getting a drama starring him not having one. Nothing in dramaland more guaranteed than this. Except maybe him being a dad.

Speaking of that scene, though, I think Kang-ho and Mi-joo is the drama relationship I’m currently the most invested in. Their relationship, from beginning to the bitter end, felt so realistic and intimate. Its so rare to see a drama relationship that felt like a proper partnership, in every sense of the word. The breakup broke my heart, especially with how quiet and understated it was, and how it was so obviously heartbreaking for both of them. Ugh, I feel like I could write a whole essay about them. Ironic, since the show isn’t even about their relationship nor is it romance-centric at all, but its depiction of a modern relationship is far more true-to-life.

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    I agree the ending was beyond painful as it had been so beautiful up to that point. She was his sunshine and they were so good together. When he showed her the face that his mum saw it was like darkness had entered their space. On his bedroom wall from a certain age onwards there was no joy in his pictures.

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    IKR. I’d rather the show focus on their story but yea, revenge plot coming in

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    Just as you’ve so well articulated, their relationship felt so real, raw and true to life. I’m LOVING their flashbacks! I know haven’t watched many kdramas this year but their chemistry is so on point that I can’t deny they’re my top favourite (healthy) pairing this year. I know Kang-ho’s revenge schemes are going to put a damper on things and I honestly don’t know if they’ll end up together (I think Mi-joo deserves better honestly), but for the first time kdramaland actually convinced me of the magic of First Loves.

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      Yup, this was one of the very few times when the romantic leads meeting as kids (as in, quite literally being born next to one another on the same day – that’s some strong fate) didn’t detract from the relationship by being unrealistic and overly kdrama-esque. Instead, it felt just right that these two childhood friends would end up together and form such a strong, loving bond. Just top-tier chemistry and incredible writing. I’m so impressed.

      My money’s on them being together by the end. There’s been a big emphasis on Kang-ho ‘starting anew’ and redeeming from his past actions and what bigger redemption is there for a male lead than to regain the affections of his first love, who is also definitely the mother of his twin children? Besides, the law of dramas (and the patriarchal society of South Korea, probably) wouldn’t allow young single mom Mi-joo with her two children out-of-wedlock to remain unhitched, even if she’s way too good for the guy.

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    This is the only reason I would want to click on ep 4. Just to see them together. I really thought they were adorable in high school.
    I am really struggling with the main plot. And the mothers approach to her son.

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The surprise of all surprises: both Joseon Attorney and The Secret Romantic Guesthouse are… really good?? And for legitimate plot reasons beyond the reverse-harem eyecandy and/or Woo Do-hwan ones??? Who would’ve thought???? Of course, there’s a very strong chance I will be eating my words in just a few weeks, but I’ll be riding this unexpectedly pleasant high for now.

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    That’s great news to be happy with two dramas is such a bonus , enjoy while it’s lasts. Who knows, they may make it a consistently good watch right to the end!

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    Joseon Attorney and The Secret Romantic Guesthouse deserve Our Blooming Youth’s ratings.

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      I actually don’t remember Our Blooming Youth doing that well in ratings. But if it did then definitely, yeah. I always want good dramas to find commercial succession and a wider audience – especially when its struggling against comparable dramas lesser in quality.

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        Our Blooming Youth didn’t do that well in ratings, but it did better than Joseon Attorney and The Secret Romantic Guesthouse, especially since it aired on cable instead of a public broadcaster. It premiered before the other two dramas, so I believe that it cannibalized the market share, and viewers had sageuk-fatigue. Although it is the least fusion of the three unlike Joseon Attorney, which is a modern drama in sageuk clothing.

        I just feel that they deserve better because I found Our Blooming Youth to be incredibly boring with no chemistry between the main or secondary romances.

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    I have not started Joseon Attorney yet but SRGuesthouse is being so much entertaining. I’m taking it as a light watch (It’s not as watching Nokdu Flower of course) but I’m always looking forward to watching the next episode. And I know that I would be binge-watching the whole drama if I could.

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    i am sold at joseon attorney for the fact that narrative flows so smoothly with no hiccups transitioning plot to plot while not that convinced with Secret Romantic Guesthouse.. there narrative feels jumpy to me…so had to drop it.
    but woo do hwan has its best drama as Joseon Attorney absolute treat

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