Beanie level: Rooftop room dweller

My Mister is done! I still have so many questions though. E.g., I know it’s not all that important, but I’m curious about Dong-hoon’s marriage. Anyway, this was a beautiful, though also brutal, watch. I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to watch this show again. But I’m glad I did watch it at least once.

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    There were some very hard moments and it could be brutal, the end left me feeling happy. Almost buoyant.
    I had a little quibble with the way they left Dong-hoon’s marriage too. He was obviously happy at the end but it still felt like it could be something holding him back. To me they never quite explained well enough why his son was away, and seemed not to visituch, because Dong -hoon still came across as someone who would be happier as a family man. Like That the state of his marriage and his son being gone had left him lonely even with his friends and family.
    It’s like an annoying itch.

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      I mean he can be a family man again. His marriage is over on good terms and he’s free to meet somebody else.

      To me his son was away studying overseas because so much of his life was governed by Korean social expectations of what it meant to live a higher class life. He had “married up” and was living the script of that life. Sending your children to study overseas is part of that script, a proof of your higher social status and wealth. But it’s not like they had enough money to pop halfway around the world every few months. And the absence of his son was part of why he was so willing and eager to ‘adopt’ Jia, because he had a wealth of paternal feelings with no outlet.

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        Are they not still married at the end? I may of misunderstood and would love it if I did and they were divorced.
        That is a good point about the son. Thinking back on the show as a whole I can see how big of a loss the son’s presence was in both of his parents everyday life.

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          No they’re in the process of divorcing. Their marriage is over, was long over, but because they found some peace with each other they’ve been slowly re-arranging their lives to prepare for the divorce so it’s not so disruptive, especially for their son. Although… I’m now wondering if that was as clear as I thought it was.

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        +1 for the second paragraph! Although I also think there is something rather poetic about Dong-hoon sending his son to a foreign land to learn — it’s almost like he was trying to ensure his son was free from the suffocating obligations he spent his entire life trying to comply with.

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    I personally found it transcendentally beautiful, especially as it moved through the back half and to the conclusion.

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      Me too. I didn’t want it to go anywhere else. Ji-an and DH knew each other. In my mind the wife was irrelevant by the end.

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      I definitely agree that it is beautiful, but it also takes a toll emotionally. Or maybe it’s just that I binged this show when I really should’ve watched it slowly?

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        The shed scene and then the hospital scene were climactic. I could rewatch both endlessly. I also loved the cinema scene. I’ve decided 2 things about the kdramas that I love:
        1. They do yearning so well
        2. They show the emotional depth and complexity of ordinary people.

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    I told you I would share with you my thoughts about it once you were done. I wrote this last year.
    As I told you, I hated almost every character.
    https://www.dramabeans.com/members/eazal/activity/1178832/

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Okay, but Gi-hoon is so out of line with Dong-hoon. Seriously, what is it with Dong-hoon’s family? Nobody will let anything be about him. They all have to take his stuff and make it about them.

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    This is re Gi-hoon blowing up at Dong-hoon after Gi-hoon finds out about the affair

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      That makes Gi-hoon a real character in blood and fresh. I can’t picture him warm and fuzzy to comfort his brother.

      Consistency storytelling (no matter how much we wish him to do otherwise).

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        I agree. It’s how he deals with issues – by getting angry. Inadequate and unhelpful, but that’s how he cares.

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Wait, so why doesn’t Yun-hui just lie when Gi-hoon asks her if she cheated? She had no compunctions lying about cheating to Dong-hoon and everybody else for so long. What’s with the sudden burst of conscience? And, honestly, isn’t it worse to tell his family? Not only will Dong-hoon be humiliated, but it also seems like he wants to keep the adultery secret.

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I have to admit, I don’t really get Yoon-hui’s reason for cheating. Like I get the feeling of neglect. That makes sense to me. But it seems like it’s more than that. This whole “I should be number one in your life, even above your brothers and mother” stuff makes no sense to me. They’re his family too. He loves her and he loves them, it’s just a different kind of love. Yes, he should’ve spent more time with her and yes he should’ve made his love for her clearer. But honestly, that doesn’t have to come at the expense of his relationship with the rest of his family. That’s not a fair thing to ask of somebody. And honestly, all things considered, he’s a decent husband. He provides for his family. He doesn’t get in to trouble. He does household chores. He doesn’t try to control his wife’s life and gives her independence. Yeah, he has his problems and he needs to work on those things, but I honestly just don’t think her complaints justify her adultery.

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    I thought it was also because she was ambitious and wanted to climb the social ladder. She wanted to leave the neighbourhood behind. She felt she was a class above them all and she didn’t respect him for who he was or what he did.

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      Yes, I remember thinking there was more to it and drama wasn’t fully explaining, not that this kind of thing is easy to explain anyway, people have their own reasons for everything.

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        I agree with both of you! But tbh this is a terrible justification for her actions. If she felt he couldn’t keep up with her ambitions, she should’ve just divorced him. It means they’re incompatible in what they want from their lives. Her entire aggrieved posture re Dong-hoon for his “mistakes” in their relationship just make me dislike her even more.

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      I totally agree. He wasn’t moving up and moving on as she wanted to do.

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    To begin with, she’s a snob that looks down on his family. Among the reasons she had to marry him (besides love) it was that he suited her life in the future: she’s a successful lawyer that earns more than him (it shouldn’t be important but it is an issue in SK), and instead of being praised for being a successful woman in all senses, she only gets sort of despise from her family, because she is better than her husband… how dare she?
    I know this is not reason enough to cheat on your husband, but then you have to put it into perspective and think of all the years she’s endured it. Add to that the fact that is really clear that it’s years since they don’t talk and listen to each other, and…
    I never liked her character (as I’d if I like any character in this drama…) but I totally understood her I’m this scene: when she arrives to the bar with a bouquet of flowers after Dong Hoon is promoted, the look she gets from her mother in law. I could have killed that old woman, aaaaaarghhhhhh… she looked at her and she was saying with her look, at least my husband is better than you. Can you imagine living always like that? Being judged because you are good?
    It doesn’t change the fact that she did wrong, though. But I totally get her reasons.

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      Envy. They felt she looked down on them and she did. How dare she not stay in her place. But she has her own journey in the drama too.

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One question I have re Dong-hoon: is he depressed by his circumstances or because it’s the type of person he is? I think it could be either or both, but not sure. With Ji-an, I think it’s the former.

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    I think its both. While we do know his circumstances play a part (family and work problems), if you’ve already watched ep 11 and his conversation with his friend, you’ll realize selflessly taking it all in is also part of his personality. That is a very good discussion btw, I replay it to date.

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      That’s true. He takes it all on for his family. He’s such a beautiful person. A thoroughly decent human being.

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    That’s a tough one. I’d say circumstances, but Ji-an recognises him as someone who is like herself, someone who is deeply unhappy. I’m pretty sure he knows, at a certain level, about his wife, and that’s undermining him. But having said that, it’s hard to tell if it’s his personality as well. Don’t want to say more, but it’s easier to tell if it’s one or the other by the end of the drama.

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Ugh, Dong-hoon and Yoon-hui need to talk. 99% of their problems are due to poor communication.

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    Okay, *originally* due to miscommunication. Now the problems are about more than miscommunication…

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      It’s a close-to-death case due to different personality and outlook, which are things hard to change. Marriage is a long race and the love between a couple needs a lot of nurturing and efforts to maintain. Kindness and generosity of spirit – the theme of this drama – plays a big part to make marriage work both ways. It’s a clear one way street in this marriage.

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        Which direction do you think the street goes in? By my reckoning, it just seems like Dong-hoon was the one always try to compromise, trying to understand, etc. He isn’t communicative, but he tried. Of course, we don’t see it, but I guess Yoon-hui tried too…

        I think, fundamentally, these too want different things. Yoon-hui is ambitious. She’s also a romantic who wants adoration and attention from her spouse. But that’s not Dong-hoon. He isn’t trying to be the biggest dog in the kennel. And while he loves her, it seems like he can’t give her the kind of love she needs.

        By itself, this difference in personality between the two isn’t something you can fault one or the other for. But the way she hangs on to his failings and tries to spin her mistakes so that it’s his fault just rubs me the wrong way.

        Now, to be clear, I’m not saying he did nothing wrong. But it just strikes me that her reaction to the affair becoming known is so self-centered. She talks about how mortified she is, how she feels like she has to die. Like if you feel this way, why did you cheat to begin with? I mean for God’s sake, she had (inchoate) plans to marry Do Jun-yeong! Clearly Dong-hoon would’ve learned what she’d done during their marriage at some point before she married Jun-yeong, assuming it really was something more than a mere fantasy in her mind. What was she expecting?

        Honestly, when you put her grief over the end of her affair with her mortification and guilt after Dong-hoon finds out together, it seems like the thing she’s really concerned about is herself in all of this. About her reputation. About who will love her now. It’s just gross.

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          Self-centered is the right description of her as if she has god-given right above others. It’s a mis-matched couple but her attitude and how she twisted the whole picture to suit herself is selfish and utterly arrogant.

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The scene where halmeoni puts her forehead on the back of Dong-hoon’s hand is very sad. How helpless must she have felt, without speech or movement, while her granddaughter was harassed and abused? How guilty must she have felt, not only because she lacked the means or the knowledge to help Ji-an navigate her troubles, but also because she must have felt that Ji-an’s troubles were magnified because of her? That message she wrote for Dong-hoon — “Now I think I can breathe my last breath in peace” — speaks loudly of her sadness, her anxiety, and her fear for her granddaughter.

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    I can’t imagine how terrible her life would have been. Their whole predicament was dire. The room, the bedding, the food, the helplessness in the face of the standover tactics. It was ghastly.

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      Also the loneliness too. I kept thinking about how, in addition to everything else, halmeoni must have felt so isolated. Ji-an was always gone during the day, Ji-an’s friend would only come once or twice each day, and even when Ji-an was around Ji-an really didn’t talk much to her grandma (not blaming Ji-an).

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        She can’t talk and can’t move. She lies there staring at the ceiling. Although I don’t think she has dementia, her helplessness is typical of that condition. It was a relief to see her in a better place with good nursing. Thanks to Dong-hoon.

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          Her cognitive ability seems fine to me. She does seem a bit naive, but I chalk that up to the fact that halmeoni is kind and gentle.

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    I teared up as I read your recap. That’s the power of this tale about sadness and kindness.

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Dong-hoon is the parental figure Ji-an always needed but could never get (not Ji-an’s grandma’s fault — she tried her best, but she has limits).

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    Yes to parental figure because many thought it was a loveline which I could never think of between these two.

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      Honestly, the suggestions by the other characters that Dong-hoon likes Ji-an make me sad.

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        To equate what’s between Ji-an and Dong-hook as romance cheapens the whole premise of My Ajusshi.

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I teared up at the end of episode 9 when, in response to Gwang-il’s revelation that Ji-an killed Gwang-il’s father, Dong-hoon simply turns around and says he would’ve done the same. That moment, the fight afterwards, and Ji-an breaking down on the street as she listens the whole encounter broke my heart. Dong-hoon is a good man.

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    Dong Hoon is the kind of man that makes you realize you need to take care of the Ji an’s around you.

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I really love how the show portrays Ji-an slowly — ever so slowly — opening up to Dong-hoon.

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I honestly find it slightly obscene that Dong-hoon wont speak up about his wife’s betrayal. I mean I get that it’s in line with his personality, but it’s honestly infuriating to watch her and President Do.

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Oh no. I’m getting to the part of My Mister where Dong-hoon is realizing what his wife is up to. I feel so bad for him. Please tell me they don’t end up staying together. Whatever her reasons for cheating (and to be clear, I can already see a little bit of why she would turn away from her husband), it doesn’t seem right for them to end up staying together. I mean she’s literally trying to get him to leave his job so that she can divorce him without looking like the lady who cheated with the boss! The betrayal here just seems to much.

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    his wife gets cheated on in penthouse drama.. so all good 🙂

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    The whole affaire was awful. But I never understood their marriage honestly. They sent their young son far from them, he spent his time with his brothers and friends, why did they marry?

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      There’s a scene where she tells him that she and their son are their family — that they should be his priority. I think the intent might be that he’s ignoring his wife and son, but the way that comment was phrase really rubbed me the wrong way. His wife sucks.

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        I do agree with her. It doesn’t mean it give her the right to cheat and act like she did but it can explain why she felt alone.

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      I understood her. I don’t agree to her actions but I understood her loneliness. I don’t want to blame their failing marriage just on her. It’s also him.
      She married him, but she never felt like she belonged in his circle.
      I wish she left him because she was unhappy. The whole affair and trying to get out without guilt was what was terribly upsetting.

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        This kind of marriage is not uncommon in that the husband and wife are from drastic different backgrounds. Love could overcome the differences for a while but not long. Then there’s the desire to return to familiarity or your own family folks which at least is the case with Dong-hoon and there’s no way the high browed wife could stand meeting his two ‘loser’ brothers day in day out. I’ve seen many cases like this in real life. Hard to blame one particular party, though.

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          Agreed that it’s not anybody’s fault for the failure of the marriage. But the infidelity plus all the accompanying betrayals are all her fault and I think she can be blamed for that.

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Finally started My Mister. On ep 2. Why is Dong-hoon’s wife so terrible? Why is that President so scummy? Why are his brothers such losers? Where’s his son?

On the bright side, JKY is actually ok!

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    Clarification: JKY’s acting is okay. His character is horrible.

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      I think JKY acts the best in My Mister whereas his other works are so so (apologies to his fans). But that’s a character with layers that it’s not a one way street of bad or hatred – just watch on.

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        Moon-eyed male lead just isn’t his forte. And that’s fine–but casting directors need to realise that!

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        JKY is heartbreaking in this by the time you get to the end.

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          I’m episode 4 and, tbh, I already find him heartbreaking. He’s an asshole (clearly), but there’s a kind of sadness to his character. A man who likes the girl who killed his father and who beats her up every time he sees her as an expression of both his liking and his hatred for her — he’s pitiful.

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      I was about to comment that JKY (character) is ok??? 😂

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    My Mister can be a great show but it is also overrated. The main character is great, he alone is already worth the drama. The brothers were terrible, every ep the same scene, apparently trying to convince the audience that those “losers” were nice guys. The issue was unless people had the same bad concepts they had, thinking only about status and money as ways to decide who gets to be called “loser/winner”, they would never think like that, so the whole plot about them was boring and disturbing at the same time. The JKY character was a bit unexplored but it was one of the good things about it.

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      The brothers are a terrible burden on Park Dong-hoon, but once again, once you get further into the drama, you’ll see the strength and love and support in that little group of people. All flawed but in the end, there for each other. It’s all finely put together.

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      I don’t agree with this tbh. I sympathize with the brothers and I don’t think they’re terrible. And I think the whole exploration of the way society treats middle-aged adults who’ve gotten off-track and who’re looked down upon as a result is really good so far.

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        Don’t get me wrong. They are not terrible. They are a family and they stick up for each other. But they are a burden. Of course things change.

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          Oh, I agree that they are a terrible burden; my only point is that they’re not terrible. A bad hand and some bad decisions don’t make you a bad or contemptible person.

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            Yep. Not terrible at all. Lovable. It is hard to watch at times because they are lunatics and emotional nutcases. But if you perservere @maq there are rewards. I don’t think it’s possible to over rate My Mister.

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            I explained below, but when I used the word terrible it wasn’t about their personality or choices, it was the way they were used by the plot, which is mildly offensive if you don’t believe in status/money as ways to define people. I liked them in the first eps and then just wanted go into that bar and slap every single one of them.

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        The thing is their pity party gets tiresome, they replay the same scenes over and over. They are perfectly fine but hate themselves because society thinks they should, and they are not smart enough to realize that. The fact the drama felt as if it had to convince the audience these guys were fine was what felt terrible, it’s not so much their personality, it’s the plot.

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          Oh I get that. They do not feel good about themselves and they are caught in a trap of their own making. I often feel like slapping characters. But they did regain self respect. I didn’t feel as if the drama had to convince them. I felt as if they found their own way to more self respect and self liking. It felt natural imo. I liked where they all ended up.

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            The trap is not exactly of their own making, it’s society’s, and south koreans seem to be even more crazy about these kind of standards. They do regain some self worth but I felt the drama did a very bad job exploring their situations. I don’t think the drama tried to convince them, it tried to convince us, the audience, because the writer imagined we would consider them losers instead of victims of a bad economic system and culture.

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            It may seem like a strange Korean thing, but honestly I think it would resonate with a lot of people whom I know. An example: I have a very close friend who has worked crappy jobs since she was 16. Even after finishing university (which she paid for all by herself, no help from anybody), she is still working a crappy job. She has deeply internalized the fact that she is a loser, even though she isn’t. I’ve spent years (and had many arguments) trying to tell her that her skewed self-image is not accurate, that she’s a victim of circumstance, bad luck, and, sure, maybe a few less than wise choices. But it’s hard. People who are in their situation, they really do feel like losers. So I don’t read the drama as trying to convince us that they’re not losers. I think the drama is actually representing the fact that they feel like losers, even though they clearly aren’t and we know that as an audience. It’s about them trying to make sense of how society is looking down upon them.

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          I never thought of them in those terms. Sure it’s a mix of individual choices and who has the power in society. But it wasn’t that heavy handed. It veered towards making the point that we find strength in each other in spite of our shortcomings and in the face of that power imbalance (economic, injustice, individual oppression of others). In her world there is no protection. In his world there is the viciousness of the hierarchy. In the world of the brothers, the redeeming aspect is that they have each other, but when it comes to what others term success (and in their minds too), they are more than a small part of the problem.

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          I may not like the brothers but they depict a good proportion of middle aged men – not everyone gets to be successful in career or life or smart enough to face the reality. Their issues are very relatable especially when you get older and look around – these two characters are here and everywhere. And, that is why My Ajusshi is a masterpiece as it delves quite deeply into those characters but without making a judgement.

          One Eureka moment for me is the funeral arc because the two brothers’ action is instantly what I’ve witnessed in real life – that someone I know would do the exactly same thing no matter how downtrodden their life is. I simply think you can’t define a person as good or bad because there are always so many shades of grey in every person.

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            So far Do Joon-yeong is a slime ball whom I hate. But aside from him and also Director Yoon, yeah, most of the characters are varying degrees of grey.

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            I disagree about the show truly exploring these characters or making judgements but I won’t say more because Maq is still in the early eps and it would be saying too much about plot.

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            @lixie, I’d be curious to know what you have to say! Let’s talk more when I finish the show (on ep 8 so far).

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Watching Revolutionary Sisters. It is, to be clear, a completely trash drama. However, the most recent episode makes confirms for me how much I hate the youngest sister and her husband. Middle sister was right to slap youngest sister. She deserved it. After going around flaunting her new wealth in her sister’s face and looking down on her, who wouldn’t feel angry and insulted? And, moreover, the way they treated Yeseul — the entire family — is just so horrible. If I were the middle sister, I’d be livid, too. The scene where Ki-jin defends youngest sister was just so cringe, too. Like, dude, you’re an asshole who consistently disrespected Yeseul. If anything, you should’ve slapped along with youngest sister.

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    It is a completely trash drama that I’m still semi watching for some unfathomable reason, and I can’t agree with you more about the youngest sister and her dumb, lapdog husband. The middle sister and her husband work hard. All the two assholes do is spend his brother’s money, and yet they think that gives them the right to look down on others.

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You Are My Hero episode 17: There’s something absurdly persuasive about Lu Feng’s logic when he says, “Aren’t you happier if you gain a billion dollars after losing a billion versus when you just have a billion dollars.” But it’s hard to figure out why this seems even remotely persuasive. You’re in the same position either way!

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    You know, that sidekick rich friend in YAMH – I felt they could have done more with him. For some odd reason, despite his being a jerk, I sort of warmed up to him, and wanted an arc where he became less of a jerk at the end. But we never got that.

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      I like him too. Tbh, I liked Xia with him more than that stiff police guy.

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        Oh yah, and it didn’t help that police guy couldn’t act much either. This chap had more energy and just generally more dynamic! The other OTP I wanted more of was the sister and the doctor. We got the backstory, but I wanted to know what would happen after. Sigh. Anyway, it was a great show despite these small issues.

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@pickleddragon Where are you up to these days? I miss you! 😭😭😭

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    You know Maq, you will meet her often if you just join our Discord. 😁

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      Okay, I cave. How do I join Discord?

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        https://discord.gg/Z6khDFgY

        I’ll be so happy if you join us. We think you’ll like at least a couple of channels there (cooking, for example.)

        *whispers* We are having a competition this Friday and the main ingredient is 🍋.

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        So this was it!!!
        And now we have you!!

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          You see Eaz, I was the one who did it yay!

          And to be clear, I wasn’t instigating the coup; I don’t want Queenie @sicarius to be mad at me, so I’ll make sure I’ll go upvote her comments on Monday ‘cause I’ll be free then.

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    Hey Maq!!!! I’m here. Mmmmm told me about your message. I’ve been generally low-key, nothing much to report. And definitely been off DB for a while.

    (Like M said, I spend (marginally) more time on the Discord beanies group than here. I do feel you’ll like it there, so think about whether you want to join 😉 )

    How have you been? What are you watching these days?? I was complaining the other day that my watchlist is really slim now:
    — Racket Boys (such a delight!),
    — HosPlay2 (doesn’t have the magic of the first season, though, I felt, plus my ship, my ship, sigh), and
    — Beyond Evil (decent crime drama – I love the ‘little town where everyone knows everyone’ vibe) but not the greatest show).

    Have you watched The Day of Becoming You (the cdrama with Steven Zhang in it – he displays fantastic range there, and if you brace yourself – or avoid – the last 10 minutes of the show, it’s a really fun and wonderful drama to watch)?

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      I realized so many brackets in my message are placed wrong – haha – but I guess you’ll be able to decipher what I’m saying anyway.

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      Racket Boys is so warm ahh I’m loving it so much that I get excited when I see love for it on the fan wall.
      The excitement I had for HosPlayS1 has somehow dwindled for s2. Though, I still think the show shines when the friends are together and this week’s patient’s stories really touched me.
      I think I might be in the mood for a crime thriller soon. What do you recommend I watch, Nobody Knows or Beyond Evil?

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        Same re Racket Boys and Hosplay! HP especially seems a little jaded and repetitive and doesn’t have the energy of S1. Maybe it’s deliberate, and it’ll pick up and turn around soon. I’m definitely sticking with it. RB is a show where nothing really happens, and is so predictable, but it’s just so full of joy and happiness, I’m loving it.

        Ooh crime thriller – right up my alley. I have four recs for you, if I may (some may involve darksiding, if you’re okay with that), although you may have watched some already:

        1. kdrama – If I had to pick just one, Nobody Knows over Beyond Evil. Not just as a crime drama, but as a drama, and for a superlative performance by Kim Seo Hyung. It’s among my all time favourite shows. BE hasn’t evoked the same response.

        2. cdrama – The Long Night. Short, 12 eps only. A fine performance by Bai Yu especially, and a little edgy in bits – I was surprised to see a cdrama go there. Ignore the propaganda. For the rest, it’s a great show. I mini-reviewed it here: https://www.dramabeans.com/members/pickleddragon/activity/1184244/

        3. tw-drama – The World Between Us. 10 eps only. This is an outstanding, world-class show, and less of a crime thriller than a drama drama. I think everyone should watch it. I reviewed this too: https://www.dramabeans.com/members/pickleddragon/activity/1221059/

        4. j-drama – MIU 404. This is police procedural but also a cop caper drama, so it’s much lighter fare than the others, but also discusses some serious issues. I loved both the MLs, who had terrific chemistry with each other. Easily one of the best jdramas I have watched (although tbh I haven’t watched much!)

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        And MeloMe, you’re already on discord, right? I don’t see you there, though!

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          Thanks Pickle, I knew I asked the right person :D. Will check these out soon and no, I’m not on discord rn, might join sometime in the future let’s see.

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      DB ate my comment =( I guess I’ll have to write it up again…

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2PM loves picking on Junho. Chansung may technically be the maknae, but Junho is actually the maknae.

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I continue to feel attacked

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    Side note: I don’t think they know how a relay dance works (or they don’t care) 😂😂😂

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I feel attacked

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I want to spazz so much about Winter Garden. However, the way they ended with Jung-wan has me so nervous! Is everything okay with Ik-sun? What has him so worried next episode? I need answers!

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    I love Ik Sun and Jun Wan individually but not together. Idk why, I can’t put my finger on it but that’s how I feel

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      I’ve always been kind of disinterested in their relationship, but I think for me the fact that it’s essentially now all done via Facetime is kind of getting old quick, too.

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        Maybe its because we see things from Jun Wan’s perspective or maybe it’s my internalised misogyny idk, but it kinda seems like Ik Sun isn’t invested in this relationship as much Jun Wan. Like I get that she has had a bad previous relationship which left her scarred but Jun Wan is very invested and he should have his affections reciprocated

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          Hmmm, I know what you’re getting at (and I don’t think it’s misogyny), but I think this has more to do with the way the relationship is being framed by the writer. To put the point differently, I think a plot point is whether their relationship will last and whether Ik-sun will give Jun-wan the kind of long-term commitment (presumably in the form of marriage) that he is hoping for. So I understand why you see it this way and why it might trouble you, but I also think this is intentional and will ultimately get resolved.

          I will say that I think the uncertainty we feel as viewers about their relationship is probably mostly an illusion, just like how this show has so often built up to something bad potentially happening and then suddenly anti-climactically pulling the rug out from under us by showing that this is just a perspectival artefact. It’s happened a few times already (e.g., when the box containing the ring returned unopened).

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            Our point of view is shaped by how Jun Wan sees IJ – and our uncertainties are his uncertainties, I think, as intended by the director. Nicely done, I thought.

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            Yes, this is my point too! =) it’s a perspectival artefact.

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        I like their relationship! I though it was cute in season 1 and I like it in season 2, too.

        As for it being all done on Facetime—aren’t all of our relationships basically conducting these days? Anyway, even pre-pandemic, I feel like this would’ve been par for the course in a long distance relationship. So I don’t find it’s getting old. I just think it’s an accurate reflection of how these types of relationships go.

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          And I’d probably be less bored by the Facetime if I was more interested in the relationship, to be honest. 🙂

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      I’m not invested in any relationship.

      For Jun-Wan and Ik-Sun, it went too fast. First, he didn’t know her name when she was his best friend’s sister, then he operated on her and then they dated when they had nothing in commun in the first place… (except to be doctor). We don’t know why they were attracted to each other.

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        Hmmm, I feel like he was attracted to her because of her quirky personality. I do agree that the relationship moved very fast though. In fact, this is probably a complaint with Winter Garden, too. The development of their relationship is too fast and not well explained (although I find so damn cute anyway).

        I think the reasons why Min-ah likes Seok-hyung are the best explained out of all of the potential romantic lines in this show.

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          I agree. For Winter Garden, the actor didn’t know before the end, like us, so it’s why it didn’t work for me.

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          I so gree with you. I feel like we, as viewers, need to see a relationship develop in order to be invested in them. Without the buildup, everything seems forced

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    It cast a dark shadow on the relationship when ISun has been lying all these times that the best friend in London is a she when it’s now a he. She might be well-intended but it breaks the foundation of trust.

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      I don’t think she was lying. The name is not male/female, and the pronouns Koreans use aren’t either. JW just assumed a female.

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        Yes, agreed. Although I wonder if omitting this important fact would count as deception. On this point, I’m conflicted. On the one hand, saying yes would seem to buy into antiquarian ideas about the relationship between people of the opposite sex; in particular, it would seem to affirm the dumb idea that men and women can’t be friends without the specter of romantic feelings hanging over them. On the other hand, the common sense part of my brain screams that your boyfriend would probably like to know that you’re going to be living with somebody of the opposite sex for months (years?) in a foreign country. I don’t know.

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          We’ll see how the writers handle it! For me personally, I knew a guy growing up with a very similar name, so I just assumed it was a guy and assumed JW assumed a guy also, so this development surprised me a bit. I thought he was just being a cool boyfriend.

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          As much as I am all for men and women being able to be platonic friends, I feel like the ommitance was not good on her part. It’s slightly inconsiderate of her, mainly because they’re in different countries and they only have their trust in each other to go on. Like it was going to come out sooner or later, had she told him in advance, he wouldn’t have been so worried.

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        A commenter on the BoD site called the theme of this episode “Faulty Assumptions.” Ver6 apt, I thought.

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        The ‘she’ part is coming from Netflix subtitle as I recall more than once of ‘she/her’ in describing that friend – but I don’t have the Korean to verify if it is indeed the case.

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          Often, the pronoun/subject is implied in Korean speech; it is not required. The he/she in the subtitles is inserted because it’s awkward in English without it. For example, the scene in season 1 where Song hwa says to Jung won “Let’s get married” has no explicit subject in the original Korean. The literal translation would be “marriage, do”. Th real question is whether the he/she was deliberately made ambiguous by IS or just through normal usage and thoughtlessness.

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            Yes, I think the real question here is if she was being deliberately ambiguous or not. I have been on the receiving end of vague personal pronouns, whereby someone switched languages in a conversation with me from German to English so that he could avoid assigning a gender to a “friend” who, funnily enough, turned out most definitely not to be a friend. But he banked on playing my assumption, and it worked (in the short term). I realize that in Korean its common to drop the subject, so she may not have been deliberately doing it. Honestly, she doesn’t seem like the type. But it can certainly make for an unpleasant discovery.

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            @carlybisek

            A little bit of honesty would prevent a mountain of misunderstandings. I would much prefer honest discussion. Any bets on whether JW straight up asks IS next episode? As she recovers – nah, suffering in silence is more likely! Talk to each other, people.

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