EPISODE 391. Broadcast on June 17, 2012.
girlfriday: We catch up with the boys on their Haphazard Trips, and Jong-min finally sits down to order his precious seafood jjampong, only to find that he’s 1000 won short. Sad story.
javabeans: So sad. Especially when he came up with that clever idea all on his own to sell stuff and autograph it, only to find it all come to this anyway. He heads back outside trying to sell something for that last buck. And wouldn’t you know it, an ajumma comes running up to him alllllll the way down the street to buy his last 1N2D pin.
girlfriday: Yay, he gets to eat!
javabeans: He literally trots back to the restaurant, all happy and skippy.
girlfriday: For his trouble, he does get the world’s largest bowl of jjampong, that seems to last forever. Seriously, it just goes on and on.
javabeans: He earned that meal, man.
girlfriday: The walking duo (Tae-woong and Seung-woo) finally reach the ocean and come across a curious patch of fluorescent moss or something. Seung-woo: “It’s like TOP!” His hair? Hahaha.
javabeans: Tae-woong sticks a patch of moss into his ear, because, um why not? Meanwhile in the Chunhyang village, the PD asks Shi-kyung and Tae-hyun what they’ll do to fill the remaining time in their tour mission quota. The boys are tired and out of cash, and would rather turn mundane tasks into “tour experiences” rather than, you know, actually doing a real one.
girlfriday: Well, I suppose that’s the loophole in their mission. They can turn pretty much anything into an “experience,” though I dunno if that’ll land them into a semantics debate with the PD later.
javabeans: They can take him. Na PD, maybe not. But Bird PD and even Yoo PD if they go out strong enough, sure. They drive along the road and look at the greenery, and Tae-hyun’s all, “Let’s have a ‘nature experience.’” Haha, they want to pull over and “enjoy nature” for the rest of their quota.
girlfriday: Su-geun and Joo-won search for their FOURTH meal of the day, and wander a marketplace to ask what other famous foods they should try. Someone suggests water jjajangmyun, and they’re both intrigued. “Does that exist?”
javabeans: That sounds wrong to me.
girlfriday: Yeah, like a mistake food. Like you put too much water in your jjajang.
javabeans: Like you actually followed the instructions on a package of Chapaghetti, when everyone knows you have to ignore them and skip the water step or you end up with ruined, watery, bland noodles.
girlfriday: They order a round and close their eyes, and then open them on three… Er? It looks more like jjampong than jjajangmyun. But it’s kind of got a middling consistency between them… like watery jjajang. Weird.
javabeans: It has to be a mistake creation. Like somebody was stuck in the eternal dilemma—jajang or jjampong?—and decided to do both at once.
girlfriday: They’re both so confused by the taste that they can’t describe it, and they swear it tastes like neither jjajang nor jjampong.
javabeans: I love the blank looks on their faces. They can’t NOT comment…. but clearly it’s not immediately delicious either. So how do you react?
girlfriday: But then… they keep eating. It actually looks like someone took the sauce from sweet and sour pork and then put noodles in it.
javabeans: Ick. That does not seem appetizing to me. But they don’t seem to dislike it; it’s just puzzling. Joo-won says it’s got an appealing, addictive quality.
girlfriday: Jong-min finishes his lunch, but realizes he’s lost a lot of time. The PD gives him a chance to call a member and ask them if they’d order fried chicken or seasoned chicken, and if they give the same answer as him, he gets a bike. That’s a weird question to ask, but I guess that’s not the point. Jong-min says fried, and then calls the walking team.
javabeans: HAHA. So Tae-woong answers, “Fried…” and Jong-min starts to celebrate, but then he fnishes, “….with the seasoned sauce. Can I ask for both?” He tells them they can only choose one, and thankfully Seung-woo answers fried. So Jong-min wins a bike and starts cycling. I think finishing his mission is probably unlikely at this point, but at least he’s still trying. The people will be harder than the island-circling, since there seem to be so few people out and about.
girlfriday: The bike is crap though, because the chain sticks whenever he’s going uphill, and then the caption reads: “We never promised it’d be a GOOD bike.” That’s so mean! He ends up walking it as much as riding it.
javabeans: Back with the experience team, Shi-kyung and Tae-hyun find a spot to dip their feet into the river water, but they’re feeling the burden of needing to fill their time. So then comes an “experience parade” (ha): Tae-hyun starts chanting random notes for a chant experience, and Shi-kyung lies down for a “proxy” experience of what Seung-woo and Tae-hyun would most want to do right now. Hahaha. If there was a team to work the semantics angle, this one’s it. Why is Tae-woong drawing hearts in the sand? Is that a redundant question? Somebody get him a girlfriend, please.
girlfriday: The walking team runs into a group of kids on the beach, who run up to offer them little chocolates and snacks. They argue that it would be rude to turn down children (ha) so they get to eat. The things this team has to do for a can of soda or a piece of chocolate.
javabeans: “We can’t hurt a child’s feelings!” “He’ll feel embarrassed!” The PD tries to ward them away, saying, “Don’t YOU want to eat them?” Kid: “Nope!” When the girl keeps offering snacks, the PD’s all, “If you keep doing that… the ajusshis will develop bad habits.”
girlfriday: Haha, Tae-hyun and Shi-kyung’s next “experience”: idol selcas. Pfft.
javabeans: How weird is it to see Shi-kyung with aegyo-face? It’s adorable, just totally out of character.
girlfriday: Jong-min has 15 minutes left on the clock, so he does another smart thing and races to the island’s old-school PA system and asks for the people to come to him.
javabeans: Aw, he’s really on the ball today. Yay, Jong-min, go!
girlfriday: And wouldn’t you know it, he clears 104 people by deadline.
javabeans: Tae-woong and Seung-woo are nearing the end of their mission, too, and enjoy the scenic view overlooking the bay below. There are 26 minutes left on the clock and they sigh, exhausted. Seung-woo suggests leaning against the railing for a while, since they established that leaning is okay…. but Tae-woong points out the sign posted that says “No leaning.”
girlfriday: The universe has a sick sense of humor. Su-geun and Joo-woon, meanwhile, do a happy dance down the street, since their mission consisted entirely of filling their bellies with awesome food. But they’re nearing their deadline too, and find that they have to order their next meal before 7 o’clock.
javabeans: With just five minutes left, they get suggestions shouted down to them from the open windows of an office building. Such a funny sight. The restaurant is about 5 minutes away, so they start running. I love how Su-geun starts panting and falling behind, and is all, “Joo-won! You go and order first!” So Joo-won takes off at a dead run like he’s shooting some kind of chase scene, and gets there with just about a minute left.
girlfriday: He totally leaves his cameraman behind! Haha. Only, he gets there and it’s the wrong restaurant. Su-geun catches up and they wonder if they’ve failed, and then they discover that the place they were looking for is just across the street. They run in and order, literally just as the clock turns to 7:00. Talk about a close call. They sit down to eat, and I’m seriously beginning to wonder if they’ve got bottomless pits for stomachs. You chose a meal with a million side dishes on purpose?
javabeans: Tae-hyun and Shi-kyung continue their invented experiences, which includes a series of impersonations by Tae-hyun, which are awesome, of course. He does a dead-on Seung-woo impersonation (squinting and saying, “I really can’t see anything”) and then Jong-min, and then… is Shi-kyung dancing to Thriller?
girlfriday: Love it. They fulfill their quota too, so it’s just the walking team left. They count the minutes and then finally Bird PD calls the operator to let them hear the time (7 o’clock and 40 seconds) and Seung-woo complains, “You didn’t tell us for forty seconds?!”
javabeans: Now it’s time to head to basecamp…. only, there isn’t one. Not yet—it’s the Haphazard Special, so they’ll decide it via a four-way, text-messaged round of rock-scissors-paper. Why is that so funny?
girlfriday: It’s even funnier because each team decides a pre-set order: rock-rock-scissors-paper-paper, or whatever, and their designated player just acts as the puppet.
javabeans: You’re taking the very essence of the game—a gut, instinctual reaction to your face-to-face opponent—and framing it using the very antithesis of the concept, by premeditating it and writing it down into a chart.
girlfriday: So then each team is second-guessing instinct and trying to strategize… in a game where you can’t strategize.
javabeans: And THEN, to make it even better, the PDs act as team proxies. Four staffers write the team names on their fists (Walking, Experience, Island, Food) and play out the rock-scissors-papers choices, which then gets sent to each team via video call. Dude. Way to take the simplest, lo-fi-est game ever and turn it into a big technological production.
girlfriday: It’s cute to watch them watching the game though.
javabeans: It’s a surprisingly cute game, even though it’s still totally backwards. Aw, Jong-min wins! Despite picking the worst trip, he’s on a roll today. That means that everyone comes to him, right?
girlfriday: That’s a nice prize. I love that he’s more surprised than anyone that he won something.
javabeans: Jong-min arrives in 10 minutes, so he gets to rest while the others travel to basecamp. He’s joined soon afterward by Su-geun and Joo-won, and they start watching dance videos on their phones.
girlfriday: Hahahaha. Is this dance supposed to make people look ridiculous, or are they doing it wrong?
javabeans: I think it’s a dance meant to be absurd, but they definitely aren’t helping matters the way they’re doing it. Su-geun is clearly going for the funny, but Joo-won sort of looks like he’s seizing.
girlfriday: By the time Tae-woong and Seung-woo arrive, the room is empty and the PD says the other boys went to wash up. So the ajusshis sit back, and then the rest of the boys pop out… from the closet. Pffft. Are we five?
javabeans: And then Tae-hyun and Shi-kyung arrive, and are all, “Where are the others?” HA. Is this the rake joke again?
girlfriday: This time they send Tae-hyun to go get blankets, and he opens the closet to find Su-geun popping out. Tae-hyun’s reaction makes it all worth it.
javabeans: I notice that Seung-woo said it was a childish prank when it was pulled on him, but he’s laughing pretty hard now.
girlfriday: It’s time for bedtime bokbulbok, and Bird PD says that because they all completed their missions, there’s no morning mission. They all get breakfast free and clear. Only… the breakfast menu is soup that SOMEONE has to spend all night making.
javabeans: The bokbulbok losers not only lose sleeping privileges, they have to work? That’s harsh, man. ‘Cause the beef soup on the menu requires lots of attention, stirring, and skimming. Cue background music: Kim Gun-mo’s “No Sleep on a Rainy Night.”
girlfriday: That soup is no joke. My mom will cook that for days. Like DAYS.
javabeans: I’ve never had it at home, ‘cause my mom won’t even bother.
girlfriday: To me, the smell of that soup is synonymous with home. Haha, Su-geun’s like, “Does anyone have the sleeping habit of doing this?” *stirs imaginary pot*
javabeans: They start with a game that’s basically a chain-reaction type of sequence. Person 1 starts the chant with a hand/body motion, and then Person 2 has to copy him, then create his own motion, and if you do it right you should have a 7-person chain where everyone’s doing a different motion, one beat behind the person in front of them.
girlfriday: Oh no, already Tae-woong is like, “I don’t understand this game!”
javabeans: He lasts the first round when Tae-hyun messes up first, but when it’s his turn in the second round he just says plainly, “I have no idea” and takes himself out as the loser. Haha.
girlfriday: Joo-won’s motion choices, even in the game, are like cutesy bunny ears.
javabeans: I can’t get over how much of a little boy he is. Is he regressing in age with each new project? ‘Cause wasn’t he thirty in Ojakkyo, and then he’s somewhere in his twenties in Gaksital, and now he’s five?
girlfriday: He’s Benjamin Button.
javabeans: I love how the losers take themselves to the lockers for their loser-time-out after they’re eliminated.
girlfriday: It’s adorable. Jong-min loses in the end because he gets carried away with dance moves that go on too long, so Shi-kyung wins first place. So then the rest of the bedtime games will be rounds of blind hide-and-seek. Since Shi-kyung won indoor sleeping rights, he’ll be blindfolded, and the first person he manages to tag out sleeps outside.
javabeans: Shi-kyung gets elephant-nose-turned to lose his sense of direction, then everyone scatters. Oh, Jong-min. He calls out, “Why is everyone climbing up?” Way to give away the positions! Hee, and Tae-hyun squeezes himself behind a VJ for disguising/protection. Then the boys toss things around the room to confuse Shi-kyung, who heads toward one wall saying, “I think Tae-hyun hyung’s around here…” and sure enough, Tae-hyun’s cringing just a short distance away.
girlfriday: Shi-kyung grabs onto his leg and he’s out. Tae-hyun’s the first to join the outdoor/soup-making team, and becomes the next blindfolded seeker. He keeps running into the line of staff to one side of the room and then squats down to have conversations with them.
javabeans: Tae-hyun again proves he can be funny doing virtually nothing. He’s not even doing much, but the way he goes about seeking people out is just so funny. Finally Tae-hyun corners three boys near the staff line, and runs into Jong-min first. Jong-min squeaks, “It’s staff!” Tae-hyun just goes with it, sitting down and asking, “So what do you do on the show?”
girlfriday: Jong-min: “Gags!” Hahaha. Jong-min’s turn to be the seeker.
javabeans: Omg, what is Jong-min doing to Seung-woo?? I’m laugh-crying.
girlfriday: Hahahaha. Does he have some kind of radar for his favorite hyung? And why is he attacking like he’s trying to maim him by pillow?
javabeans: It’s hysterical. He’s right in front of the closet where Seung-woo is hiding, and all he has to do is reach out and touch him. But instead of ending it easily, Jong-min starts throwing pillows inside the closet, pelting Seung-woo, who looks totally confused.
girlfriday: There’s no reason to be hitting anyone in this game, and he’s literally like, why am I being beaten up right now??
javabeans: Then he finally reaches in and softly touches Seung-woo’s hand, and then gently cups his face. Shi-kyung: “Aren’t you going too far with hyung?”
girlfriday: Jong-min: “H-h-hyung?” What, you mean with three-to-one odds, you thought you were pelting Joo-won?
javabeans: Tae-hyun does the last round, which is hilarious because the trio of Tae-woong, Su-geun, and Joo-won promise to stick together and stake out one corner. Tae-hyun approaches humming the Jaws theme, and touches Su-geun first. But instead of just claiming him as the loser, he then seeks out the guy on the left, and the guy on the right. Ah, this one has long legs, and this one wears a cap. He’s basically deciding who to drag down with him, and Jong-min’s all, “Bite the loser on the leg!”
girlfriday: This time, the hiders are the ones who attack, basically pelting Tae-hyun with pillows the entire time he’s scrambling to figure out who’s who.
javabeans: I love the way Tae-hyun laughs. Have you noticed he basically laughs, “Hee hee hee”? As in, literally the sound of “hee”?
girlfriday: Yeah like a high-pitched giggle every time. It’s contagious.
javabeans: Su-geun gets bitten (literally), so indoor sleepers are Shi-kyung, Tae-woong, and Joo-won.
girlfriday: Tae-hyun calls his wife to ask how to make the beef soup, and then Su-geun suggests that they play a game to determine one person who’ll start the soup, and he can wake up the next person whenever he gets tired. They do a random draw, and poor Jong-min is on soup duty. And his day was going so well.
javabeans: He stays up for five hours stirring and skimming that soup, yeesh. The PD asks if his mom ever made the soup, and Jong-min says yes, but he didn’t know how hard it was ‘cause he just assumed she woke up early to attend to it. Not stayed up all night.
girlfriday: Aw, is he purposely not waking up his hyungs and doing it all by himself? That’s so sweet.
javabeans: He takes a nap, then wakes up at 6am and this time wakes Tae-hyun too, who helps him with the rice and kimchi prep. As they all eat together and the other hyungs note that he didn’t wake them, he admits that he didn’t want to, but then he was running out of time so he only woke up the next-youngest.
girlfriday: Su-geun and Seung-woo both awwww. As they eat, Su-geun asks Joo-won how many meals they’ve had in the last 24 hours, and he just shakes his head, like TOO MANY. Tae-hyun: “Next week Lee Kang-to will have gained some weight!”
javabeans: After breakfast, the PD announces their trek, which doesn’t exactly go over well with this exhausted cast. But then he adds… yet another bokbulbok? This time it’s for going-home privileges. Somebody gets to skip the hike and go home early! Everyone immediately perks up. Even the managers huddle around as they conduct the draw, wanting an early day.
girlfriday: They draw spoons, and Su-geun gets to go home first. He starts hesitating, saying he has nowhere to go, and then his manager runs up to get his mic off and usher him out. Ha. Bird PD says that Su-geun will start the process of deciding the last-place person’s punishment. There’s more punishment than going home last? This is getting juicy.
javabeans: Now Su-geun wrestles with the dilemma of whether to be mean for the sake of variety, or nice. Of all the guys, he’s the one who’d worry most about this question, isn’t he?
girlfriday: Probably because he could come up with the worst if he wanted to. He gets to decide the “when” portion of the punishment. Haha, he jokes, “At first snowfall?”
javabeans: There’s another cast member who’ll get to go home early, and to decide, the PD starts a game where they’ll pose questions to the bystanders to get them to vote for a cast member. Say, which one is your ideal type, or the one you want for your brother. Tae-woong gets one vote up on the others in the first round and Seung-woo says they’ll have to find a place where Tae-woong isn’t as popular, and Tae-woong tosses out, “Is there such a place?” Haha.
javabeans: Then there’s the question posed to a young girl: Which cast member would you absolutely not want for a boyfriend. Hilariously, Jong-min immediately celebrates—he’s got this one sewn up! HA.
girlfriday: They’re like “How can you be happy about that?” But he’s ecstatic. He gets to go home next, and decides the “where” part of the punishment. And then they spin a football, and Joo-won gets to go home. He gets to choose the “what.” Poor Seung-woo hyung, who wants to go home SO badly, but keeps losing every game. Shi-kyung wins the next game, and determines the “till when.” I’m scared for what this 4-part punishment will be.
javabeans: With the last three members still hanging around—Tae-woong, Seung-woo, Tae-hyun—they get to reveal the piecemeal punishment. When: “When your whole body is soaked.” (Su-geun’s contribution.) Where: “In front of a bathroom.” (Courtesy of Jong-min.) What: “Do the very worst kind of pelvis-shaking dance.” Thanks, Joo-won!
girlfriday: HAHAHAHA. Seung-woo: “This kid is the worst.”
javabeans: But it gets even better! (Worse?) Shi-kyung’s contribution: “Until 105 bystanders have gathered.”
girlfriday: The three of them go silent. Tae-woong: “I want to cry.”
javabeans: It’s a beyond-the-fourth-wall moment, because they’re just all imagining having to do this punishment, and it makes the mood go heavy. I can’t even decide who I want it to be.
girlfriday: You know they’re all like, How far do I really have to go for this show? They line them up for the backwards-forwards game (only this time it’s left or right) and Tae-hyun realizes he’s up against the two guys who spent all day together. He’s convinced they’re rigging the game against him, and freaks out at every little eye contact.
javabeans: Tae-woong loses! HAHAHA.
girlfriday: That’s pretty much the best possible outcome. I love that Tae-woong and Seung-woo DID try to rig the game, only they confused each other in the process.
javabeans: The other two wonder if they leave now, but Seung-woo’s like, “Nah, we should stick around to see the wet part.” They teach Tae-woong the dance, and now that Seung-woo isn’t the one who has to humiliate himself, he’s all into it.
girlfriday: Aaaand, now I’m a little sorry Seung-woo didn’t lose.
javabeans: Oh. My. So Tae-woong takes a bowl of water with him and sets up in the island of a busy intersection (a toy potty serves as the “in front of a bathroom” requirement), and then… just starts dancing.
girlfriday: COULD THIS BE ANY BETTER?
javabeans: It’s amazing. Also because he’s not attracting much of a crowd, and that means he has to keep dancing. So his shame at being seen is warring with his desire to get this over, and he laments, “Everyone’s taking videos of me!” But then he decides, aw screw it and takes off the face mask and starts calling people over. ‘Cause it’s the only way to not get stuck there for hours.
girlfriday: I have a feeling Joo-won’s gonna get his ass kicked next week.
javabeans: Although, isn’t it the water part that really makes this ridiculous? Like, every so often he has to keep pouring water on his torso, which is just… it’s just too meta. I love that the schoolgirls are crazy over him though, and they start dancing along with him. Ha, it’s a crazy-humiliation dance, but they’ll do it ‘cause oppa’s doing it?
girlfriday: Oppa can do no wrong! He finally gets enough people gathered and crawls back onto the bus, soaking wet. Now I’m glad they stuck around, because at least they can comfort him after the fact.
javabeans: Seung-woo asks what this place means to him now, and Tae-woong answers, “The place that awakened my dancing instinct.” Then buries his face in shame.