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The Third Charm: Episode 5

The jealous boyfriend has arrived and he means serious business. Joon-young’s insecurities get the best of him this episode, making him question Young-jae and everything about their relationship. Unfortunately, there’s not much to go on with her being his first and only girlfriend. All he can do is stay angry with her, which he’ll find is nearly impossible to do.

 
EPISODE 5 RECAP

Joon-young catches Young-jae in her salon washing another man’s hair. To Joon-young, it looks like the two are having a grand ol’ time flirting, but we cut to inside the salon and see that the man’s (Ho-chul) advances fall flat every time.

Young-jae answers a call from Joon-young, who’s watching from behind a bush, and says she’ll talk to him later. Unsatisfied with her response, Joon-young takes the snacks he’d bought for her and leaves. He opts for Sang-hyun’s bar instead.

After Ho-chul’s new hairstyle is complete, Young-jae brings him up to the register. He stares at her intensely and she asks what’s wrong, acting coy. He leans in, saying there’s a hair on her face, and…

“STOP,” Joon-young yells, shattering his imagination and scaring everyone in the bar. He’s still fuming when he drives home, so he doesn’t answer when Young-jae finally calls him back.

His annoyance slips into the workplace the next day. He chides his team members for their police reports, saying he’s practically choking from their lack of commas. At that, Officer Jung immediately backtracks and adds a comma, heh.

Later, Joon-young has lunch with Officers Jung and Gong. After learning of Joon-young’s lady troubles, his teammates serve as the shoulder angel and devil with their opinions.

Sweet Officer Jung assures him that the man in the salon was probably just a customer. And besides, he and Young-jae have a history, meaning loyalty. Joon-young starts to smile, but then Officer Gong (who’s still bitter about his failed date) says that if he’s too trusting, he’ll get stabbed in the back.

Their other teammate Officer Lee joins them, suggesting he put his police badge to use and try to catch them in the act. And Joon-young, being the impressionable goober he is, actually listens and has a stakeout outside Young-jae’s salon. Young-jae calls to see what’s going on, and he huffs that he’s busy with work like she is. He then spies Ho-chul passing by in his car and hangs up to trail him.

Joon-young follows Ho-chul to a gas station, making himself totally conspicuous as he stares him down. Ho-chul approaches him, politely asking if they know each other. Joon-young presents his badge, lying that there’s a sex offender on the loose who looks an awful lot like Ho-chul; he asks to see some ID.

Joon-young returns to Sang-hyun’s bar to relay his findings. Now that he knows Joon-young is up against a big shot plastic surgeon, Sang-hyun thinks he doesn’t stand a chance. He says that if Young-jae isn’t cheating with him now, she definitely will later. “That man is a lion,” Sang-hyun explains, “and you’re a sloth.” So he suggests he give up and let nature take its course. Joon-young hangs his head, more confused than ever.

Joon-young returns to the salon to watch Young-jae. He follows her on her way home and narrates, “I know Young-jae very well. She stays long after closing time to practice. As long as the subway is running, even if she’s tired, she doesn’t take taxis.”

As Young-jae waits for her subway car, Joon-young stays back. He sees her texting and opens his phone to messages saying she misses him. “I know Young-jae very well,” he thinks, “and I trust that it’s nothing serious, but I still didn’t want to answer her.”

He rides her subway as well, watching her sway in exhaustion. When someone leaves an open seat, a man moves to take it, making Joon-young grab his arm. He makes sure Young-jae takes the seat and then apologizes, saying he mistook the man for a friend.

Joon-young then notices that Young-jae isn’t carrying the portfolio she had earlier. Cursing, he gets off the train and runs across the station to take the next train back. A couple has already found the portfolio and, admiring the drawings, taken it with them. Thankfully, Joon-young catches them in time and asks for it back. Aw, you softie.

Young-jae realizes too late that her portfolio is missing and panics. At the salon the next day, she tells Joo-ran, saying that all of her designs for Hong’s fashion show were in there. Like clockwork, a package comes in for Young-jae, and she’s overjoyed to find her portfolio. She wishes the sender had a left a name so she could thank them.

Ho-chul’s assistant tells him that the “Devil” has returned, and he heads into his office to find So-hee (ha). Outside, the nurses gossip about So-hee and the fact that she only comes here because she wants to marry him. And So-hee certainly flirts it up as she brags about her spot in Hong’s fashion show.

She reminds Ho-chul of the first time they met, when he’d dissuaded her from having any surgery. She tells him that after saying those kind words, he should take responsibility for her. Ho-chul chokes on his coffee.

She invites him to the show, and though he doesn’t seem all that interested, a nurse comes in and fangirls over the star-studded event. She promises to make sure Ho-chul will attend.

So-hee visits Young-jae’s salon next, wanting her hair done as a sort of test. Young-jae reluctantly does so, while So-hee orders the students around, demanding special coffee and food. Young-jae does her best to hold back, even when So-hee brings up the old days. Either way, So-hee says she probably won’t be a regular since Young-jae’s skills are lacking and she makes her uncomfortable.

Elsewhere, Joo-ran is off on yet another blind date with a much younger man. He seems to be knowledgeable and classy, and Joo-ran excuses herself to call Young-jae and tell her all about him. Young-jae thinks the age difference is too much, but Joo-ran is all for turning this boy into a man.

However, when Joo-ran heads back to their table, she overhears her date talking about her. He tells his buddy on the phone that the old lady he was set up with could be his aunt and he’s tired of watching her sit stiffly in order to hide her stomach.

Joo-ran barges into the room, making the guy hang up, and she sits in a more-than-comfy position. She drops the honorifics and orders him to pour more wine, scaring the kid. As she gulps down her glass, it’s clear that this another manhunt mission failed.

Still stressed over So-hee’s hijinks, Young-jae tries calling Joon-young and Soo-jae but neither answer. So she just leaves the salon, nearly colliding with a scooter and dropping her designs. Ho-chul, who’s passing by, stops to help her pick them up. He then pulls her away from another oncoming car.

Now that they’re together, Ho-chul joins Young-jae for her spicy chicken feet dinner. He asks if she had meant to come alone, and she explains that the person she wanted to be with can’t eat spicy food.

Ho-chul says he believes that spicy food is a great stress-reliever, echoing Young-jae’s thoughts. He mentions that even doctors think mental health is more important than physical health. At that, Young-jae admits that when they first met, she thought he worked at a club because all he ever talked about was women. He laughs and says he mistook her for a gangster, making them even.

Ho-chul orders some soju, making Young-jae wonder if he’s also stressed over something. He isn’t exactly stressed, but he does say that there are people who make him uncomfortable no matter how many times he sees them and people who put him at ease after only meeting once.

“It might be because there are no personal feelings there,” Young-jae points out. She says that any relationship, whether good or bad, starts to feel uncomfortable once there are feelings involved. He smiles at her as she continues to eat.

The next day, Joo-ran is exercising at the park to rid of her stomach fat (oh, honey, no). While taking a bathroom break, she encounters a small dog and takes it outside to find its owner. And, what do you know, it happens to be a very good-looking man.

Meanwhile, Soo-jae’s coffee business isn’t doing so well. He decides to give two coffees away when he doesn’t have the right amount of change, and his next customers happen to be officers wanting him to move his car. Poor guy.

To make things worse, Soo-jae doesn’t have enough money to fill up on gas. He reluctantly calls Young-jae for some help. Just then, Joon-young and his team are walking by after having had lunch.

Joon-young notices Soo-jae by himself and excuses himself from his team to join him. After Soo-jae explains his predicament, Joon-young happily pays the bill. They’re still talking when Young-jae arrives and she smiles to see the boys together.

She drops the smile to confront Joon-young, asking why he’s been ignoring all of her calls. She then turns to Soo-jae, concerned that he ran out of money, and he lies that he has things under control.

Joon-young says goodbye to Soo-jae and turns to leave, with Young-jae following close behind. Despite what he says, she can tell that he’s upset and she wants to know why. He tells her everything as she follows him back to the station.

She’s surprised to hear that Ho-chul is the cause of all this, and she assures him that it’s no big deal. Still, Joon-young is worried after seeing Ho-chul flirt with her; he says that any guy who sees her would like her.

Young-jae bursts out laughing, frustrating him further. But she just looks at him sweetly and gives him a quick kiss, calling him adorable.

He avoids eye contact as she shakes him and says, “No matter who flirts with me, you’re the only one for me.” Still, he quietly tells her to get in the car so he can drive her back. Like I said, softie.

In the car, Young-jae tells Joon-young not to get suspicious again and he tells her not to do anything that makes him suspicious. She promises and then suggests a nice, romantic date after the fashion show.

She lets out a big yawn, wishing she could let out all her stress with a night by sea before the show. As she drifts off to sleep, Joon-young gets an idea.

When Young-jae wakes up, the car is parked in front of the ocean. Joon-young appears by the window with a drink and she looks up at him, stunned. He merely says that he hopes the view relieved some of her stress, and she’s so moved that she starts to tear up.

He then says that they should start driving if they want to get back that night. She grumbles that he killed the mood, and he just continues that she needs her sleep for the show. She leans out the window and interrupts him with a long kiss.

Designer Hong’s fashion show starts gearing up the next day, and backstage is total chaos. Designer Hong is running around yelling at models, Young-jae and her students are styling any hair they can get their hands on and, of course, So-hee shows up late. Nevertheless, the show itself goes on flawlessly, and Young-jae is able to get So-hee all dolled up once she arrives.

Joon-young, however, is stuck in traffic the entire time. By the time he gets to the building, the show is coming to a close. He jumps out of his car with flowers for Young-jae, but stops when he realizes he didn’t park between the lines. He knows he should ignore it, but he ends up re-parking anyway, lol.

After the show, Designer Hong praises Young-jae and suggests they work together again, earning a scowl from So-hee.

Ho-chul and his nurses find their way backstage and So-hee lights up. Ho-chul walks over to her and is shocked to see Young-jae there as well. So-hee’s smile falters as she realizes the two already know each other.

So-hee orders Young-jae to bring her a cup of coffee, so Young-jae has one of her students fetch it. So-hee turns to Young-jae and silently tells her to stop being obnoxious and do as she says like the hairstylist she is.

That tears it. Young-jae loudly repeats what So-hee just said, saying she should stop being obnoxious herself and just have some confidence. So-hee stands up and jabs Young-jae in the forehead, asking who she’s calling obnoxious.

The girls start shoving and pulling at each other’s hair (ugh, not this again), before Young-jae falls to the ground. Ho-chul grabs So-hee’s arm, telling her to stop, but she yells that he shouldn’t worry about a hairstylist like Young-jae.

As Ho-chul says that he came to see Young-jae and not So-hee, Joon-young pushes through the crowd to see what’s going on. And the first thing he sees is Ho-chul helping Young-jae off the floor. Frozen in place, he just watches with a broken expression.

 
COMMENTS

You guys, I’ve figured it all out. So-hee is the source of all of Joon-young and Young-jae’s problems. She starts a fight in 2006, they break up. She starts a fight here, and there are signs of them breaking up again. Coincidence? Okay, in all seriousness, So-hee is becoming a bigger pain by the minute and I’m seeing absolutely no chances of redemption. I just don’t get her character at all, outside her being a straight-up villain. A villain that has to beat Young-jae at everything, even with men. Now that the So-hee business is off my chest, let’s get to the actual problems at hand.

The pacing is really starting to worry me. The flashbacks were rushed to get us to their 2013 romance, and their 2013 romance is being rushed to get us to what I’m assuming will be their present-day romance. At this point, I want the director to pay attention to the yellow traffic light and slow the hell down. Admittedly, when the drama’s synopsis was first announced, I thought we’d see all four “seasons” of their relationship simultaneously, giving us four timelines in each episode. In my head, it seemed different, thought-provoking, and fast-paced in a smart way. But the drama’s setup here makes it feel like the typical rom-com that’s fast-paced in all the wrong ways. All I can say is that something constantly feels off and that something may be Young-jae. I keep noticing that Joon-young gives and gives and gives, while she only receives. That’s why I was glad she provided some reassurance and told him that he was the only one for her. But their whole dynamic is still unbalanced.

True, the relationship has always been somewhat unstable, but their first three months of dating created enough fluff to hide that. Now that there’s an actual obstacle, even an arguably minor one, the fluff is useless. And of course, they’re not talking about it. And, you know what? Now I want them to fight, because it seems like the only way these two will hash things out. This is their first real relationship, so I can understand why Joon-young sometimes acts like a jealous teen boyfriend. He has nothing to compare it to. And, to be quite honest, he has a legitimate reason to feel uneasy. Young-jae isn’t the type of person to grant security. In that, I mean that affection, and constant showing of that affection, is not her forte.

If Joon-young has the time to shadow her at the subway, then couldn’t she put in a little effort too? (Also, don’t you have actual crooks to catch, Joon-young?) People show affection in different ways and on different levels, but Young-jae’s affection for Joon-young is hard to read. Like she’s not in it 100%. She’s never been one to show her emotions easily, so that could be the cause. Maybe she’s holding back because she feels she has to. Either way, if the drama is trying to make us feel as if we’re in Joon-young’s shoes, I can definitely say it’s succeeding, because I am officially conflicted. Like him, I am confused with Young-jae’s actions (or lack thereof), and even angry with them. Like him, I still love her so much as a person that I can’t stay angry for the entire episode. But there will come a time when that love won’t be enough. And I fear that that time is imminent.

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"All I can say is that something constantly feels off and that something may be Young-jae. I keep noticing that Joon-young gives and gives and gives, while she only receives." And here lies the crux of my issues with this couple, which have actually been present from the beginning. I've suspected it since the spicy food incident and her bullishly tossing aside his date ideas (which contained some of his own likes and preferences, and ended up being substituted with HER choice in movie, which he didn't like, and which she mocked him over).

I truly believe, 100%, that this is going to break this season of their relationship. I don't think Young-Jae's malicious, but she's the more dominant personality in this relationship and has put in no effort to share Joon-Young's likes, instead letting her preferences dictate the what and the how.

The way I see this going is: Joon-Young is giving and not receiving, and Young-Jae's character - as you said - is not one to give security. The result must feel kind of like dropping stones into a bottomless well.

All Joon-Young has to hold on to are the few outright promises she made...roll on the childish hair-washing thing. He's put far too much weight on it, it's being blown out of proportion, but it's going to be the symbol of all the underlying inequality in their relationship.

I think it's not so much about lack of trust, he says so himself in monologue...it's everything that promise and it being broken symbolically represents. I think he's feeling the inequality and it's starting to bubble to the surface, but he probably doesn't know how to put it into words, because he's a professional doormat for the women in his life. He's starting to need constant positive feedback to allay his fears, and Young-Jae really isn't the kind of person who gives good feedback or security.

On a side note, I still don't like Young-Jae and is it just me or is her laughter incredibly false? When she laughed at Joon-Young's rant in that parking lot, it was like nails on a chalkboard. I haven't seen Esom in anything else, I don't know if this is bad acting or just this character.

Also...Joon-Young was me in this episode. I work in an office and I lose my mind over commas and comma placement on a daily basis, and if I park outside the lines I feel like I've committed a capital crime and have to re-park.

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The thing that baffles me is blaming her for him not saying anything. The spicy food incident in which he didn't say he couldn't eat spicy food because he wanted to look cool to her. The date incident where he didn't say any of those things were things HE liked, he just suggested them for the date he planned out for the both of them and when she would shoot something down he didn't try after that. That truly did set the stage for their relationship. It set up him conceding to her but not ever saying anything, him just keeping his mouth shut even as he knows what her personality is like. Straightforward and I wouldn't say she's very tuned into other people's emotions either. She wants people to be clear cut. Part of the reason she doesn't talk behind people's backs and she confronts people to their face about things.

She's not going to try and be accommodating in a serious way because he doesn't ask her to be in a serious or significant way or tell her why either. It's an unequal give and take i agree but he doesn't seem to care about that, he clearly likes doing a lot of stuff for her and some people are just like that. That's not the issue. It's a communication issue at it's core. One they're both responsible for, communication goes both ways and they need to both know to be more in tune with the other and nudge them harder to truly speak with one another. But right now it's mostly on him. If you're the one feeling uncomfortable and insecure, like at your core, you need to articulate why and explain that you're having a hard time and make sure the other person understands that it's serious. And if after that they refuse to cooperate then the issues is more on them and not you. You did your part. This is genuinely the one thing he needs her to give him, and he hasn't made it clear to her at all yet. Jokingly asking for a promise to not wash someone's hair isn't it. And if he can't find a way to say it, which is valid some people just have that type of personality, he needs to be with someone who's more emotionally tuned to other people who can pick that up from him.

And now we have the natural conclusion of that issue, he let himself stew in his insecurity for days on end ignoring her attempts to reach him and she had to run into him by chance for him to say anything. And when he did he clearly didn't talk to her about how deep of an insecurity it is and that he's feeling. He just said he was upset she washed a customer's hair, and it really is a small insignificant thing taken out of context and she took it that way. She's not a mind reader and she's not in his head to know and understand that he's an insecure person and really needs to feel assured that way. It's unnecessary, it's damaging, and I think the show is making it very clear that the problem right now is him and his pettiness. Especially in episode 6 which I won't speak more on because this isn't the thread for it.

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I do think that Young Jae hasn't learned about giving more from herself in a relationship. This is a first for both of them and it'd be best if they could grow together. She's lucky that he likes doing stuff for her, but she still should offer and try. Plan a date for him every once in a while to let him know she cares, etc. Just because he's okay with it doesn't mean it wouldn't be nice of her to do. So I get you there. But that's not the problem here.

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I've never denied any of this about Joon-Young, and I've stated before on various TTC recaps that I think his behaviour this time around is going to be the breaking point. I've already mentioned that he's digging his own grave by being too giving.

He did try to tell Young-Jae that he doesn't eat spicy food, but in the middle of speaking she called out loudly over him that she didn't understand anyone who didn't like spicy food. It's not like he sat quietly and said absolutely nothing, it's just a shame he shut up after that, probably expecting to be judged.

Joon-Young has serious faults, and Young-Jae does too. There are also serious personality clashes. Both have their own brands of selfish and uncommunicative. I give no free passes and can only watch the train wreck that's definitely coming.

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Trying isn't doing to me, so I guess that's where our differences lie with our responses to that situation. Regardless of if he though he would feel judged or it won't turn out well I'm of the opinion he needs to speak up. In that case it's something small, it's just spicy food on a kind of date and you want to look good, it's not crazy that after she said it that someone with his personality would keep quiet. But it was still him keeping quiet, and it was still him failing to communicate what he feels and needs. It was kind of a sign of how he'd act in the relationship and we're seeing it now. And I think that's the issue, not him being too giving. If he was half as giving and this narcissist man from hell cropped up the exact same thing would be happening in my opinion. He need emotional reassurance and isn't letting that be known. But we all have different reads on it, and we all agree he's digging himself into a hole here in some manner lol. We all see how this round of the relationship is going to end honestly.

I haven't looked at the other threads on dramabeans for the third charm, I've been on soompi mostly, so I didn't know what you've said on other threads about him but at the time I read this comment as more Young Jae critical when I felt the show was trying to say it was a both of them issue, more heavily leaning in *his* direction right now. As well as a general compatibility issue they need to work through together if they want to last. And I've seen a lot of comments saying similar things to what you did but then outright saying the whole situation is her fault and I conflated those comments with yours which isn't fair. They're similar but coming from a different place, so to say you were blaming her specifically was my bad! I need to read your other comments to get a fuller picture ^^ take a lesson from the drama and not presume I know what's going on in another person's head and all

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I find Joon-Young exhausting. His insecurity is exhausting. I can't wait until they break up, maybe I side more with Young-jae because we have her personality doesn't bother me, but not everyone wears there heart on their sleeve. She hasn't shown him anything that should make him distrust her. She in fact called him several times, but his pettiness didn't allow him to answer. I dislike pettiness precisely because it is unnecessary.

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Hard same. She can't be blamed for his overwhelming insecurities. He's stalked her, ok. People in a normal relationship don't stalk each other because they're afraid of being betrayed, essentially. He's cute, but he's not without fault.

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It bothered me when he followed her in the subway like that. Where does he even find the time for it? Isn't he meant to be a team leader?

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Thanks @sailorjumun
Joon Young (and even Young Jae) reminds me so much of teenage or early romances. It's all about my emotion. I feel so much, I act on the feeling. Eventhough I know I shouldn't and the matter is actually small, I must react with emotion instead of with common sense. Inexperienced romantic relationships have a lot of self-love, (self preservation) and ego over love for the other, going with it. In fact, it takes time to learn to be really loving. It's not surprising that many early 'loves' are not fully love.

I feel that Joon Young is causing his own difficulties. Young Jae has always been pretty aloof but she did make moves to call him, she did ask him to explain his anger, she's been consistent even in her aloofness and interest in him. She has not sent mixed signals and she has been trusting him.

Joon Young is too driven by fears, insecurity and emotions to make good decisions and take the right action. So much growing up (unfortunately the best way to grow is to suffer pain) is needed before he can be more mature, boyfriend material.

Young Jae too can improve, of course. She's just been self-centred in that her attitude is: "Take me as I am or stuff it!" She has not yet come to grips with the giving more of herself in the relationship, to make it work more smoothly.

Well, the shows about time and seasons and growth... 😉

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I actually find the male lead incredibly annoying. I can't identify with him at all. I also feel if the roles were reverse people would be saying to the female lead to get a backbone, to express yourself, " how is he suppose to know you are angry if you ignore him". "stop focusing so much on the little things", "stop being so petty", "oh my god she is a cop and is focused more on petty things that her job" oh my god she is so annoying mopping everywhere". So I feel the same way about the male lead. He is the one who is angry by himself and is not talking things thru, how is she suppose to know his feelings. Is she suppose to read his mind? he knows the type of person she is, he decided to be with her because of that. Side note i do feel like he gives a lot: like apologizing to her because what happened in their first timeline, even though i thought it was unnecessary, she was the one who had to apologize. And he treats her very well, but building up anger towards someone and not expressing and talking things through its very dangerous for a relationship. he can go from loving her deeply to hating her just as deeply.

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So true.. He is annoying... The director direct him make it even worse. The think is he knows it he is annoying. But his character is write with detail that i know where he is coming from. So his journey will be worth it. I notice this writers like to write the male charac far from typical male lead. From like a farytale to romance full of life. Hopefully the journey to his change will be worth the wait and satisfying.

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Oh he's definitely annoying - I find both of them annoying, mostly because everything that's happening here is so avoidable with basic communication and mutual effort. I think this is being done on purpose so that their final season has them both being mature, likable people who have changed for the better and can finally have a healthy, functional relationship.

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Heh. JoonYoung is so emotionally high maintenance. And YoungJae just can't meet that. That's all.

They're gonna have to work it through themselves.

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I must be weird because I like the pace of the story! Its more easy to digest imo. Well, YJ is the 'its not a big deal' type while JY is the 'ITS THE END OF THE WORLD!!' type... We all know theyre complete opposites but this episode, JY... My Gawd, I genuinely fell for his caring personality despite his childish fits and was ready to give him the upperhand over YoungJae everytime because she was hard to read but this time, Im on the fence... He threw a fit when she wasnt even lying because she was working!! Unlike him that seems to work in the most chill crime free area in SK lol He's kinda difficult to deal with since he needs sooo much emotional support yet won't say things straight or pick up when called or run to his gf when shes injured. Id like to know how the hell they would work things out but I guess we would def have to wait til the 2018 timeline because it would surely not happen in 2013... They have a looong way to go

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And That Should Be Me song by Justin Bieber is playing on my mind when JY see the doctor hold HJ.. :(

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Joon young is an insecure mess...he is way too high maintenance.

Youngjae is better than me still messenging and calling when he is actively ignoring her...and called it cute.

You would think it would be more of note to him that Youngjae was ON THE FLOOR

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Part 1 of 2

Thank you for recapping, SailorJumun!

I had to laugh at your lead paragraph because actress So-hee is such a jerk. She may have set this whole sorry shambles in motion by including Young-jae in that collegiate group blind date back in the Lower Devonian, but I will never understand why she insists on continuing to insert herself into other people's lives. Especially people she dislikes.

Well, actually, I do. So-hee is a bundle of insecurity, and cannot bear to be ignored or forgotten, especially by those she deems to be her social inferiors. She sashays around and ropes others into being obligated to her for giving them “valuable opportunities” while denigrating them the whole time. I think of her as a warped Lady Bountiful whose every seemingly beneficent action has a string attached that is designed to reinforce her elevated social standing while undercutting the recipient of her empty largess and entrapping them in her personal baekjeong (untouchable) class. She builds them up to knock them down. It is her pathetic attempt to raise herself at the expense of others. She cannot exist without some kind of audience, be it fans, sycophants, or social media junkies – and the chumps she treats as doormats. Oh, and the desirable male objects of her “affection,” whose status is higher than her own.

The more I see of this drama, the more it strikes me that insecurity is a major theme. Different characters exhibit it and react to it in different ways. So-hee is vain about her appearance, requires a retinue and popularity, and must be the queen bee. Young-jae is insecure about her broken family and poverty, but confident about her professional abilities. Aside from her close and loving relationships with Soo-jae orabeoni and her boss Joo-ran, she is emotionally self-contained, and self-centered to the point of not giving a hoot about others' feelings, needs, opinions, or reciprocity in general. Young-jae does not share her innermost thoughts and feelings, but does her darnedest to suppress them, and when that fails, expresses them only under extreme duress. I'm not sure why she even has a boyfriend.

... he [Ho-chul] does say that there are people who make him uncomfortable no matter how many times he sees them and people who put him at ease after only meeting once.
“It might be because there are no personal feelings there,” Young-jae points out. She says that any relationship, whether good or bad, starts to feel uncomfortable once there are feelings involved.

- Continued -

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Part 2 of 2

Joon-young comes across as a green-eyed dingbat in this episode. A self-effacing green-eyed dingbat who performs kind deeds on the sly. Who drops everything and spontaneously drives Young-jae to the ocean just because she said off-hand that it would get rid of her stress. Given the way his family treats him, I'm not surprised that he is insecure and emotionally high-maintenance. He's grown up in a family that has never truly appreciated him for himself. His obnoxious younger sister harasses him mercilessly. To borrow a line from standup comedian Rodney Dangerfield, Joon-young “don't get no respect.” And he happens to fall for a woman who does not play well with others, at least when it comes to intimate relationships. While he has an immature streak a mile wide, he also has a kind disposition – unless he feels threatened with abandonment. Young-jae's usual detached way of interacting with Joon-young keeps him on tenterhooks. Which is no way to live, even with her occasional spontaneous smooches.

Owing to his accident, Soo-jae is financially insecure, but in some ways, he strikes me as the one person in the show who is emotionally grounded. I appreciate how he phoned Joon-young when he had his debit card fiasco at the gas station. The two seem to hit it off well. Too bad they can't just have a lovely bromance and leave Young-jae out of the equation completely.

Joo-ran is yet another insecure basket case. Her biological clock is ticking loudly. In a way, she is like Joon-young in that she desperately wants to be in a relationship, and has tried to play the dating game by conforming to others' expectations and demands. I would like to see how she would get along with Joon-young, but he is not marriage-minded, and is still too wet behind the ears. A better bet for her would be Officer Gong, if their paths could cross again under more conducive circumstances. They both want the same things: marriage and offspring.

-30-

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Insecurity is a huge theme. I don't like So-Hee, but I thought that her insecurity and her inability to recognise it were her driving forces. She gives me the impression of someone who grew up spoiled and privileged, but who sees people with less than her being better people and having more 'riches' by way of their personality and family. It seems to be something she finds hard to accept, and I think that's a reason she's always had issues with Young-Jae. She HATED that Young-Jae got any attention from Joon-Young, Sang-Hyun and their friends, she took it out on Young-Jae, even though Young-Jae did nothing to ask for that attention and is in fact a mess of insecurities herself.

"A self-effacing green-eyed dingbat" mwuahahahha yes. I understand how he got to where he is, even as it's deeply annoying to watch, because it's all so avoidable. I still think that Young-Jae's personality has dominated his, they do what she likes, and it's happened to an extent that he's got other feelings mixed in there as well as insecurity. He's a ticking time bomb of resentment.

I actually think that Joon-Young doesn't know who he is any more. The decisions he made that advanced him from his school years to being a cop were heavily influenced by Young-Jae and his bitterness. I don't think he would have become a cop under different circumstances - it seemed to me like he did it to prove to her memory that he could, rather than any real passion or interest.

The Joon-Young we have now is a Frankenstein's monster he composed out of attempts to slap back at insecurities and bad memories. If he doesn't even know himself well any more, how can he ever be secure or confident? Especially when faced with a lover who is not so good at emotional reinforcement or give-take. This is a recipe for disaster.

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A drama about insecurity is really hitting the nail on the head. Thank you for saying all this I agree with pretty much all of it. Also you nailed So-hee and what's going on with her. Except I think from what her ex-friends said about her being bullied in school made it seem like it's a self fulfilling loop of insecurity with her. Bitter and lonely as well as insecure is a recipe for her to never be able to grow from it. She doesn't have actual friends she has underlings. People she uses. And Young-Jae is the only person who refuses to abide by her self destructive petty insecure shenanigans and that gets under her skin so whenever possible she tries and insert herself into her life and bring her down a few notches. Which will never work because of who Young Jae is. Young Jae is, as you said, someone who bottles it in when she knows (thinks) it won't affect her and then explodes when she's had enough, but even when she's bottling it in in So-hee can tell she can't stand her and isn't be brought down by her antics. And Young Jae's also, like you said, someone who has a hard time giving a hoot and a holler about other people's feelings because she quiet frankly doesn't have the emotional capacity for it because of how she processes her own emotions. I also think she has a hard time reading other people's feelings and understanding why, she's not a very complicated person emotionally and doesn't know how to deal with other people being sneaky, underhanded, or even read other people when they're being quiet about their feelings, like Joon Young is right now.

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Hmm I find myself nodding along to all the comments so far. Was preaching to Young Jae to go meet Joo Young in the middle till last episode. But this hour,when Joon Young Jekyll-Hyded(Feeling a bit over dramatic myself ;) ) between being a whiny baby and swoony boy friend,I found myself saying "break up already". You guys are totally right about Joo Young's completely irrational jealousy but over the course of his monologue we can see it is not about a stupid hair wash at all.The guy is all kinds of insecure and he has chosen to be in a relationship with the worse kind of personalty type for him at this point. Young Jae simply isn't the type of person who would vocally re-assure him.He needs to hear words but the most she is giving him are smooches. Joo-Young just isn't emotionally literate enough to realize and communicate that he needs more from her. But I also can't blame Young Jae completely.She is changing but the pace is soo slow and just isn't visible to Joo young . She now seeks out other friends to go eat spicy food coz she has finally realized you shouldn't drag your S.O to activities they actively despise.She reaches out to him when she is unexpectedly iced out.
Another big issue between them could also be their attitude towards their careers. Joon-Young arguably has the more intense job but he isn't as intensely involved in it as she is. He is a smart kid who picked this path based on a childish "I'll show her" and is good at it. But he would be good at anything he picked. Yes,he musta put a lot of effort into meeting the physical requirements of the job.But for Young-Jae her job is her ticket to a better life-both for herself and her brother.She is more consumed with it and has the usual zeal of the hard worker who had claw and cinch everything she has got.She is still struggling to get new heights against odds while he has easily and comfortably got to be a team leader within 7 years. His colleagues (grudgingly)admire him,she still has to prove herself to people who could make or break her career. The issue of their socio-economic status that contributed to their first break up is still at play.Yes they might look more even footed but where you come from and how you got there always leave their marks on you,whether you realize it or not.

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All of This!!!!! My comment made it seem like no criticism for YJ, because JY was more annoying, but you have stated everything.

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Aww really happy to see we are in the same boat.Let's hope we stay afloat 😊

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THIS. Jekyll-Hyded is a great term too - I used 'Frankenstein's monster' in a comment above, and both of these terms describe his odd mesh of personalities well.

Young-Jae isn't a bad person, and I know from having seen episode 6 that she's open to learning that she needs to put in more effort and do more than laugh at him and kissing him. But like you say, she's learning at a pace that's much slower than Joon-Young's emotional issues. By the time she's realised something's not right, he's already spent a majority of the episode wallowing in depression.

Your point about their careers was one I hadn't considered before, and you're so right. I was actually impressed with Young-Jae for managing to reach the place she's at now even after having to become the breadwinner for the family and having to put some degree of care in for Soo-Jae. I know from experience that it's easy to miss out promotion and advancement if you shape your circumstances around disabled relatives. But if you look at it from a negative perspective, it could be another resentment bubbling beneath her surface, and yet another way she and Joon-Young's career advancements were too different.

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Glad to see your take on it,Alex.Have been taking in your opinions on these past recaps and I agree with you about a lot of Young Jae 's problemtic behavior in theie first run.
This time around though,I feel that she is approaching the relationship with a more open heart than he is.As the wounded party during their first tryst,I can certainly understand Joon Young needing more assurance than usual and even agree that Young Jae needs to give that to him.And therein lies the crux of their current problems.Her view of their relationship seems to be more simpler than his-they just need to love and support each other so it seems to her that she is doing her part.Of course when he manages to eek out his feelings in few juvenile bursts,she fails to listen coz to her it is a non-issue that she won't be swayed by anyone else.Joon Young sees the possibility of heart break and Young Jae simply sees a clean,happy road.Atleast that is how I have read the situation till now.Hoping to catch up on ep 6 soon-ish.

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I agree, especially after episode 6 (no more comments on that because spoilers!), that Young-Jae is being more open about all of this. I still have some problems with her character and her decisions, but it's clear to me that Joon-Young is the one who's going to cause the problems this time around.

Even when he tries to communicate, it comes out badly, and she clearly can't understand or relate. I can see she's making efforts to improve, but Joon-Young is now stuck in a dark place he can't seem to get out of.

The depth of his funk actually surprises me, which makes me think it runs far deeper than his relationship. I wonder if there are other serious issues in his life that are making everything seem so much bigger than it is. A few times, I wondered if maybe he suffers from depression and has done for a while.

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Sadly, I don't think I can make it to the 3rd charm/relationship. I liked SKJ in AYHT a lot, playing both roles. Esom was of course great in Because It's My First Life....but they don't seem to have that much chemistry to me, and Young Jae doesn't seem to need a relationship as much as she needed other things in her life (job stability, self-esteem, supporting her brother). Don't think it's worth 10 more episodes, i'll check if folks like this on recaps.

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Thanks @sailorjumun for the recap and all the comments. You know I think Team Leader On Joon-young (still waiting to see the real tough guy JY) is not busy enough. It is time for the serial killer (remember him) to make an amazing escape from Seobu Penitentiary (PP). It might get JY back on a real stakeout.
Maybe o/t but that spicy chicken feet dinner in this episode was about the most unappetizing thing (food-wise) that I have seen in a kdrama recently.
I would have stuck to the soju.

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This episode proves that both of them need to sit down and talk. Like actually talk. Clashing personalities work fine enough if there’s actual communication but both of them act out on their own through their insecurities. It’s exhausting seeing them crumble every time but I feel like it’s necessary so that the air is cleared once for all. They should both talk about their expectations for each other too because their relationship is very unbalanced, teetering on the edge of dysfunctionality. Also So Hee need some to chill, she’s such an ungrateful brat. Ugh. More hair pulling possibly in the future.

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