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Live Your Own Life: Episodes 12-13 (Drama Highlights)

Finally, someone calls Hyo-shim out on her devoted daughter attitude and “good girl complex,” and it’s none other than her bratty niece, LEE RU-BI (Lee Ga-yeon). Good Girl Hyo-shim pulls out the “Adults have a responsibility to take care of their family” card. But to Ru-bi, Hyo-shim is just codependent — that is, she finds purpose in life by devoting herself to her family, which is why she can’t break free from the abusive relationship. Ouch! Ru-bi was harsh, but she’s not wrong, and the weight of her words sends Hyo-shim into self-reflection. At least someone reflects after being called out. Hee-joo cannot be bothered even after her son, LEE PHILIP (Lee Joo-won), scolds her for neglecting him and his father just to bend over backwards for Ru-bi.

It’s a more eventful week over on the chaebol side, as Sook-hyang and her minion fake Halmeoni’s death. All it took was a decomposed body, Halmeoni’s ring, and some dental records to throw the whole Taesan Group into mourning. Sook-hyang clinches the Best in Wailing award, and a shocked Halmeoni watches as the world bids her farewell on TV. On the flip side, Tae-hee returns home for the very public funeral — which is Sook-hyang’s warning for Halmeoni to live as though she were dead. But a televised funeral sets off suspicion among the tenants at Uicheon Villa as to whether the rooftop Halmeoni is really a chaebol, or just a lookalike.

On the romance front, unlike her business/strictly platonic relationship with Tae-min, Hyo-shim is starting to feel something for Tae-ho. After Tae-ho collapses during Halmeoni’s wake, Hyo-shim is appointed as the gym’s representative to visit him in the hospital — and it’s bye bye to tracksuits and hello to a nicer outfit and makeup. Speaking of the gym, Soo-kyung spotted their flower wreath at the funeral and made a mental note of the gym’s name. Looks like someone is set to stake a claim on “her man.”

 
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As obnoxious as Ruby is, she told some truths that HyoShim needed to hear. She was bang on about someone like HyoShim being likely to fall for a man who needs her, not one who likes her. TaeMin is a self-sufficient man with whom she will never feel 'needed'. Whereas TaeHo comes across as a lost puppy who needs someone to take care of him. Is that his appeal?

The mother and the brothers still refuse to grow up. The way HyoShim's mother openly favors her sons over her daughter is also due to ingrained patriarchy. The way HyoShim accepts it with just mild annoyance is also a result of growing up in a patriarchal society. I'm sure if there was another sister, HyoShim would have been a lot more angry.

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@KDramaTipsy: Bang on. Patriarchy has normalised different modes of control and violence against women. In highly hierarchical societies, some women effectively become co-oppressors of other girls and women even if they lack agency in a number of ways themselves. Hyoshim largely internalises her anger even though even when she vocalises her grievances, they make no difference. This drama’s narrative arc will take months to show a real rebellion by Hyongshim but it would b great if it could become more subversive and call out some of the systemic issues too.

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Yes, in real life it takes a long long time for people to see the manipulations of their family. Most people don't get proper clarity before their 40s. The sad thing is that people don't really change, so even if one gets clarity there isn't much one can do coz those family members will remain as they are. But the clarity does help in setting some boundaries.

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Agreed. I cackled when I saw the mother serving her son the food she had prepared for Hyo Shim. My mother did the same thing once and I never ever let her forget it!
In a highly patriarchal society, women internalize the concept that sons are superior to daughters and they are the ones who are going to look after them in their old age. I am seeing it now with one of my woman students who is doing exactly what Hyo Shim is doing in the drama. She is essentially sacrificing her life/career for her parents. I wish there was a Ruby to tell her some home truths! I should possibly show her this scene.
It is going to take a lot of effort for Hyo Shim to break free of the toxicity of patriarchy. But I think she has taken the first step.

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The 'good girl' or 'good boy' of the family usually have it the worst. And there are definitely more good girls than good boys.

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True. Also because boys don't need to be "good" to get what they want. In fact they are enabled to be "bad" and are able to get away with a lot of BS IRL.

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So true.

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- I can't gasp how can the family so easily neglect Hyo Shin when nearly everyone lives off her. With that said, I can definitely relate to the subtle misogyny. If I got good grades it was because "girls are more hardworking, but the guys' brains are wired differently". Thankfully, my mom had only one child and with years, I managed to get her out of that mindset.

- Tae Ho is cute and Tae Min is whiny. 'I knew you for three years" is not a reason why a girl should give a guy a time of her day, especially considering that most of that time she was his coach.

- Here comes a shameful admission: I failed one important exam 6 times. I would study 2-3 hours every day, get a good score on mock tests, and fail on the real thing. The reason? Stress. The moment I would register on the exam, my brain would stop working and I would have a hard time understanding even the simplest texts. I tried everything from visiting a therapist to swimming regularly.
I am saying that because I genuinely believe that when it comes to exams, after a certain point the more you want to succeed the harder it gets. The second brother is not working, he has no friends and no social life, he is a dead weight to his family and believes that he can pay them back by passing that exam. Basically, he is putting the utmost importance in that test and the pressure impedes his ability to focus. I feel bad for him, but somehow he has to break that cycle.

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For anyone is similar boat as I was: along with finding job, start going out more often. Surprisingly, what helped me was going to theatres and ballet. I have been to +60 performances this year alone. If you are not picky with the sits, it is not even an expensive hobby.

My therapist also recommended taking an alcoholic drink to relax a bit (did not work), getting massage (strangers touching you. Very uncomfortable) and starting dating someone (unfortunately, I haven't been kind to any boy before the age of 10, so no cute oppa for me).

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Fighting!! 🤞💪💃

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I knew you for three years - and nothing happened ‼️😂

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@unit, thanks for the highlights.
Tae-Ho makes considerable progress in regarding relations with Hye -Shim.
Tae-min, is so far behind in that contest, all he sees is Tae-Ho’s dust.
Ru-bi dresses down Hyo-shim but makes a valid observation.

Chairman Kang is drunk again, slapping Minion Yeon while casting vague accusations about Yeon and Madam Jang.

Madam Jang puts on an act at the funeral, crocodile tears, fainting.

Of course, Hye-do manages not to see the coverage of Halmoni’s funeral and Tae-Hee forgets all about seeing a Halmoni-esque figure .
Ga-on is a singer and also falls ill.

Does the landlady have an evil twin with a criminal past ? 😂
Imagine two of her .

Hyo-shim should have drunkenly scarfed down the chicken.
Law Student Brother still needs to come down a few notches.
Those poor eggs 🥚 🥚 🥚!

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Well, one thing's for sure...I know that my gym is NOT full-service. They don't personally deliver GIANT baskets flowers to customers while they are lying, adorably coiffed, but unconscious in hospital!!

Hyo-Shim's confused gaze there at the end is really quite sweet, though, isn't it?

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My enjoyment of the series is solely dependent on knowing what I am here for/in for and making liberal use of the fast forward button as required. I always thought that was how everyone watched 50+ episode weekenders :-). Still, surely they could have given us more than 30 seconds right at the end, as sweet as it was. I am enjoying the juxtaposition of Hyo-Shim's extreme disease every time she is cajoled into spending time with Tae-Min vs. her obvious ease with Tae-Ho, bickering/bantering and all. Tae-Ho takes her to her preferred choice of food/restaurant and they clearly enjoy each other's company vs. Tae-Min dragging her to places she doesn't want to go and where she feels totally out of place. Tae-Min doesn't listen to her even when she is screaming "why do you never listen to me!" at the top of her voice. Sigh.

Having said that, can we please have more scenes with Tae-Ho? Please? He is the ML after all. Who looks very adorable even on a hospital bed.

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So adorbs, even in hospital. Also, welcome to the Dramabeans comment section, @al118! Here are some pictures of Tae-ho for you :)

https://imgur.com/a/alZTeP7 [it may ask if you’re over 18–but I promise there’s nothing NSFW]

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Thanks! Yes, way over 18!

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If Taemin feels so disturbed seeing Taeho & Hyosim in slightes interactions he should stop being wishy washy. He can learn a thing or two from Rubi 😂

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But but... are you a precious chaebol, Seon-ha??? 🧐😄

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Yes. Yes, I am.

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Oh, but then it is definitely included in your gym service in case you fall unconscious... under the the condition you look as beautiful and adorable as Ha Joon, of course.

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Yes. Yes, I do. 😘

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@Seon-ha: The weekenders are still so weird and wonderful to me. Trying to get used to the bizarro worlds.
The gym thing might be culturally specific but I thought of how much you must be enjoying Ha Joon in this. His character’s entitled whinging brat is treading the path to become the poor little rich boy but gotta admit Ha Joon infuses it with some charm.

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Got sorta caught up (ep. 9-11) in a FF binge and was able to watch Episodes 12 and 13 over the weekend and I finally realized several things that are bugging me about this show. First, I just don't get the appeal of Hyo Shim. I've never watched the actress before so I don't know if it is her or the writing, but I feel nothing for her door mat personality and I like even less her sudden "caring" for Tae Ho after an apology/family sob story, one night of binge drinking and a hangover soup lunch.

On top of that, I was looking forward to Ha Joon in a romantic lead role - he's very good at bipolar smooth/charming and cold/calculating. Instead, Tae Ho is a man-child - jealous of Tae Min, doesn't like any criticism, constructive or otherwise, and for 6-7 episodes, treated HS horribly - FOR NO REASON. (We actually understand the enmity between Mi-ran and Hyo Jun because things started badly between the two of them right off the bat). Tragic life or not, he's 30+ years old and hasn't earned a living his whole life. He has learned to charm his way through life w/out doing the hard work (except go to university in the US). The writers are to blame - I hope there will be more to his character development than simply Hyo Shim's love interest.

I actually enjoy many of the scenes with other characters - mysterious grandmother, staff and clients at TS Fitness, Soo Kyung (TV Anchor), Hyo seung and family (no matter how unlikeable mom and Ruby may be), Hyo Jun and Mi-ran and finally. . . . . the presumably "evil" Yeom Jin Soo. He's a great actor and it isn't for nothing that the director is lavishing all of those hateful looks he directs on Mom/Dad for nothing.

At one time (pre-debut), he was described as a co-conspirator with Ms Seo but I figured the article was wrong because right off the bat he has been acting like loyal henchman - but after he came up with a clever solution for resolving the "grandma" problem, I'm keeping an open mind.

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It was clever but really emotionally devastating for the family. Except for Evil Madam of course.

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“At least someone reflects after being called out” —-> this x 100
I hope I don’t get banned for this, but I want to slap(hard) Hyo Shim’s mother, sister in law and niece. So she spoke some home truths. Doesn’t make her tolerable. However, “stop taunting me in such detail” cracked me up.
I can’t help but feel sorry for Tae Min through all this. He isn’t getting the girl, he is getting manipulated by his evil mother and he lost his grandma just as much as Tae Ho did. He showed concern for Tae Ho over grandma’s death and when he collapses,which was so touching. As cheesy as it sounds, I would love to see the 3 cousins join forces and support each other.

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Nearly every character on the show needs to write a self-reflection paper. Maybe that’s why Aspiring Actress is my fave. She has the most mature sense of self out of all of them.

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I snorted real loud at the concept of, “needs to write a self-reflection paper.” I…know…so…many…IRL…people…who could also really use this assignment 🤣

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@Asha13: I don’t think they wield the banhammer here. Worse comes to worst, they would delete the comment.

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Ahh ok whew. Cos I was suggesting violence 😂

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😊

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This isn't a Reddit sub with over-zealous moderators 😁

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It's obvious what the writers have planned for the OTP ( HS and TH), but thus far, it's unclear for Tae Min. If he will be "grey" throughout most of the drama, I'm okay with that (provided he doesn't kill anyone or endorse fraud), but many viewers assume he is a villain from the start, in spite of many scenes that indicate otherwise. I don't feel sorry for him - he carries many burdens with strength and duty, but I would at least like to know that he will do so consistently.

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Ru Bi was harsh but she is not wrong. Her brothers and mother are adults. They have to figure out their own lives and support themselves. The brothers should not depend on their mother and sister to support them. The mother should be equal in treating all her children. I am glad this made Hyo Shim think since the current situation is very unfair to her.
Poor Tae Ho. I sure hope Grandma would be able to think of something to take her life back.
Tae Min's jealousy may get the best of him and be a pawn of his evil mother. Tae Hee should tell Tae Ho only that she saw Halmeoni out and about roughly the day before they supposedly found the body in the water.
I hope for more Hyo Shim and Tae Ho scenes next week.

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"more Hyo Shim and Tae Ho scenes"

Yes please - to help remind us who is the otp.

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Grrr now I like Rubi. One day she will be the only one who will survive 😂 say it like you mean it
So the reason why Hyeosim like Taeho than Taemin, because she has a 'good girl complex', needs to feel needed and rely upon to feel happy. Taeho is a fragile, beta male, A for variety Drama!

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For a change the psychobabble is actually sounding like something sensible. 😂

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Episode 12 has our Macknaes suddenly transformed into (temporary) chicken farmers- some fun scenes. Despite his fixation on money Hyo-do leaves the eggs behind and gives Tae-hee a piggyback ride when she sprains her ankle.

Ruby is even more of a lowlife than I thought. Yet she is probably the first member of Hyo-shim’s family to really lay out the truth of how her family has been unjustly leaching off of her. As Ruby puts it to her “You have to live your own life”. Ruby notes that her family has literally been exploiting her. I guess even Ruby has her uses in this story- after all the truth that Ruby tells her aunt is what this drama is all about. It also occurs to me that part of what is wrong with Ruby reflects her determination to never live like her aunt.

Ruby’s little brother also spoke some bottom-line truths to his mother regarding Ruby, her husband and Hyo-shim as well.

Evil Aunt’s Sinister Minion- instructed by her to get rid of Grandma- arranges to fake her death. This is apparently good enough for evil aunt as far as keeping her out of sight.

Now is the moment when Tae-hee is pulled back into her family’s drama, making very significant the moment when she took a picture of her grandmother from the bus.

We saw very little of TV Lady in these episodes- just the brief appearance at the funeral where she spoke formal polite words of condolence to Tae-min. The real message was not in her words but in her eyes and voice which expressed so much caring for him. It was startling how different she was from the confident predator which we saw before: It turns out that Ms. Choi has a heart. It was a remarkable performance from Lim Ju-Eun, which gave us much more insight into her character than you would expect in such a short time.
Just before this our Media Moghul dropped some extremely important information: He stated that he and Grandma had had a special relationship. This fact may become extremely important in time.

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TaeMin doesn't realise it now but the TV lady will make the perfect chaebol wife for him. She is intelligent and sharp, and she genuinely seems to like him too. She will also be able to keep the control freak in him in check. HyoShim can never do that as he will simply walk away from her complaints 🙄 He is under so much pressure at work and home that HyoShim's softness and sincerety seems extremely attractive to him right now. However, when they are together it's obvious that they both speak different languages.

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Tae-min is genuinely attracted to Hyo-shim but you are right that they do not speak the same language.

That brief glimpse we had of TV Lady was eye opener- she does indeed genuinely like Tae-min.

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How can anyone think a "fake funeral" will keep Grandma out of the picture, or that it would work? She was a missing person. The police would have had to investigate an unknown death. Take DNA samples. Trace her steps. Talk to witnesses. Gather evidence. Confirm the identity of the deceased especially since Tae Ho is suspicious of his own family.

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DNA would definitely derail the scam, so don’t plan on seeing it. 😂
Tae-Ho would probably request a DNA test though in real life.

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I think it was more a threat to Grandma.

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Isn't it too "public?" It brings into light media attention and government claims such as the 50 percent inheritance tax on Grandma's wealth and stock holdings.

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I think the drama logic was that the dental scan was enough proof of the identification.
And Evil Aunt wants to scare Grandma off so she never appears again.
Tax etc are some pesky details, I guess, plus I'm pretty sure they will come up with some forged will. 😁😁

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Short answer: Way, Way too public and quite frankly stupid.

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And one that will genuinely backfire: That is the significance of Chairman Choi's remark about his special relationship with Grandma.

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The threat they hold over Grandmother is Tae Ho - whether his life is in danger or his reputation (plans afoot to send him off to jail).

Tae Min's mother is clearly "insane" and I DO get a good laugh every time she says "I'm going insane" and Henchman Jin Soo rolls his eyes in agreement.

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We have yet to see a single cop. Not even for a missing person report . 😓

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We are now at the 25% mark and I am regretting that I did not begin taking my usual notes earlier. There have been many dropped hints about Chaebol grandmother and her role in Taesan Group. Textiles - sewing machine - volatile husband who hit her (?) son with a golf club - "advisor" - corporate disunity after the death of??? (Grandfather? #2 son?)- and now, special relationship with Media Mogul. Is it too much to hope that this writer will connect all of the dots - together with your comment last week (?) that #2 son was grooming Tae Min and not his own son??

Since grandfather, #2 son and his wife have been cast, I expect some very informative flashbacks of what REALLY happened a few years ago. I hope we don't have to wait for Ep. 48 to see them.

I want to know more about Choi Soo Kyung (TV Anchor) and I want to see more scenes of her with Tae Min that are longer than 30 seconds. And more Hyo Jun and Mi-ran. Otherwise, struggling to keep my overall interest in the plots and stories. interesting characters are not enough.

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So much of the plot refers back to Tai-min and Tae-ho's grandfather that it would not be possible to move forward without more detail.

I agree that it really is high time that we got more airtime for TV Lady. This is also not the first Weekender for the actress who plays her: Im Ju-Eun was also the 2FL in the well-regarded GOOD THIEF, BAD THIEF.

I liked your observation that our mysterious Grandma seems to be at the center of all of the mess which is the corporation and Tae-ho's family.

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I don't know if this is caused by the personal tragedy and the consequent replacement of the actor or if it is something else (replacement of the writer?), but it seems to me that the drama is still trying to find its footing (and style, sometimes it gives me whiplash) and that we are still in the setup phase. And I know it's a bit like comparing apples and oranges, but the daily Unpredictable Family is about similar drama-time further (16hrs, 32eps) and so far much better at being steady and developing ALL lines simultaneously. Taeho is the proclaimed Male Lead here, but we see sooooo little of him, especially in the last episode. 왜? Why??

Hyoshim is the product of the patriarchal (and Asian?) society and tries to be the diligent daughter she is supposed to be, but she is getting rightfully fed up (and we with her). Rubi's correct assessment of the situation still doesn't excuse her of her rudeness and disrespect... and although Hyoshim may be partly drawn to Taeho because he seems to be currently pitiful and asking for care (plus there is also something like siblings constellations and how we choose our partner based on that), she and Taeho just click! and are attracted to each other. That's how falling in love works, we fall or we don't. 😁 (Sorry Taemin, you are just not the one.)

Lawyer Oppa was the biggest disappointment this week, I had thought Uri Awesome Aspiring Actress got through to him, but he was still happily mooching from others and even leaving his young brother to pay for the dinner, that's a big NO! But the turning point is coming soon (I hope).

I still may not fully understand how Taesan chaebol family (dys)functioned, but I like Grandma and how resourceful she is - she managed to escape her prison and now seeing a sewing machine she immediately buys it (and no other rubish 😄) and I believe she will start business soon. Fighting Grandma!

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Hyo-do is a High School dropout ? How old is he supposed to be now ? And he doesn’t have a job ? Does He still has his military obligation to do ? The cutoff age is 28 I believe.

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The military enlistment age is 30.

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@dorotka: The new actor’s characterisation sure seems to be floundering and it is difficult to overlook the stark differences between the 2 actors’ work. It hasn’t settled down as yet. I wonder if it will at all?

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I'm still willing to give it a chance... but will reevaluate around ep.20, probably.

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Lawyer Oppa's turning point will come only after he fails the exam for the last time. The guy has no Plan B. And he looks down on those who do. He won't change until karma kicks him hard.

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@KDramaTipsy: I hope they don’t make the young woman a former lawyer or paralegal who will help him pass the exam. She shouldn’t saddled with that as well as dealing with his shitty entitlement.

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God, yes! I hope they don't go there!

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I am looking forward to his rude awakening and karma. He needs to treat his sister and everyone else better. He was rude to Landlady Grandma as well when she only spoke out of concern for the women in his family that is supporting his lazy ass.

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He needs some knocks in life to get rid of his entitlement. The problem is that his mother won't let HyoShim not help him when Karma strikes. And HyoShim is still a pushover. Hoping she toughens up by then.

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Funny, but I was thinking he might actually pass - but since there is presumably a few weeks (months if in the USA) delay before results are known, perhaps he will embark on something different while he is waiting.

I liked his convo with his brother - I'm glad they are not putting all of the family members in their own little "silos" of interaction.

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That's what he should ideally do. He should ideally also do some kind of part time job to earn his keep and not let his sister pay for everything, but he is too entitled to do something that's so menial in his eyes. That's why I feel he won't move his sorry ass till Karma gives him a kick right there.

Yes, it was a pleasant surprise to see the two brothers together. They all seem to be connected only through the family home, and not individually with each other at all.

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I have to wonder, would Hyo-shim be happy in the world of chaebols ? 🤔
Definitely not as Tae-min’s wife, TM is still controlled by his evil mom ‼️ HS couldn’t possibly survive that atmosphere.

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That is the major pitfall for Hyo Shim plight: she cannot get away from bad mother but to chained to an insane evil MIL is unfathomable prison sentence in Hell.

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I wish there was had a non chaebol option, perhaps someone from her school days who is now a professional athlete ?
Perhaps Tae-Ho abandons the world of chaebols ?

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Non-rich option: her gym co-worker Hwang Chi-San has looked out for her, been a sounding board when she has been frustrated, but I think he thinks he is out of her league.

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You gave voice to what made me uncomfortable with this choice- and why it is the ultimate reason to turn down Tae-min.

She does not suffer such a MIL with Tae-ho BUT there it may be that Ruby is right: She would just be trading one co-dependency for another, unless Tae-ho changes a whole lot.

The Shaman is right: Neither Tae-min nor Tae-ho is the right choice for her.

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That’s right, shaman did say that. ‼️

Has a 3rdML ever managed to win over a FL ?

Can such a thing happen in a K drama ?🤔

If they do it’s probably at the end via a time leap. 😟

Special guest star as Hye -shim’s husband EP 50 😂

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I have just watched Episode 14 and as far as I am aware they only list 14 episodes and since it seems to be no where near a completed drama was wondering if anyone knows what the go is? Are they making Episodes just a week or two in advance or is there another season in the plans?
Because if it ends on Ep14 without closure I'd be most disappointed.

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There are going to be 50 episodes, so this barely started.

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That was a weird scene with the drunken chairman. So it turns out evil henchman was the owner of the same textile factory where met his wife. Did that factory have something in the water that turned people evil? He even called her an evil witch. So I guess he's not as clueless as we all thought. And I found it interesting that he referred to both men as his sons.

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My understanding is that TaeSan Group owns the textile factory and, in fact, my hunch is that it began with Grandmama who knows how to sew.

Grandmama and her hubby (who apparently had major anger management issues) sent their eldest son to manage the textile factory but (1) he failed miserably and (2) married the book-keeper who seduced him.

Meanwhile, they groomed the younger son (Tae Ho's father) to eventually lead the Taesan Group.

I think writers shifted gears a bit - originally, the Chairman chided his wife for drinking too much at the welcome home dinner. The Grandfather forced his eldest son to clean the shoes of the executives and also hit him in the head with a golf club - that explains what appeared to be PTSD in the earlier episodes.

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that makes a lot of sense

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